Video summary
Alex Hormozi argues that feeling bad or experiencing hardship serves as a critical signal indicating that something needs to change, framing this sensation through the lens of judgment and decision-making regarding whether to push harder or pivot strategies. He illustrates this distinction with an analogy from weightlifting: one must determine if they are quitting because they lack discipline or because they face imminent injury; similarly, entrepreneurs must decide between pushing up a hill when facing execution challenges versus pivoting when fundamental assumptions about product-market fit prove false. Hormozi emphasizes that while losing teaches valuable lessons, the specific lesson learned depends entirely on how accurately one interprets reality, noting that it is significantly easier to learn new habits than to unlearn bad ones formed through early reinforcement patterns. Central to his philosophy is the concept of defining terms based strictly on observable inputs and outputs rather than vague labels or internal assumptions. Hormozi critiques common societal misunderstandings where people attribute behaviors like stealing simply to a character flaw such as dishonesty, which he views as circular reasoning that fails to explain reality effectively. Instead, he advocates for breaking down complex concepts into their constituent behavioral parts; just as one learns basketball by mastering specific mechanics of passing and shooting rather than the abstract goal of "getting better," individuals must define success through concrete actions like hugging or listening rather than ambiguous terms like love. This approach prevents people from being constantly surprised by reality, which he describes as undefeated and indifferent to personal expectations regarding traffic jams or other unanticipated events. The podcast highlights how inaccurate frameworks of reality lead to unnecessary conflict and resentment, particularly when individuals operate on different definitions for the same concepts without realizing it. Hormozi shares an anecdote about two employees arguing over politeness where one party expected kindness while the other focused on bill-paying duties; by asking clarifying questions rather than making unspoken demands, they resolved their misunderstanding instantly. He connects this to a broader principle that complaints often stem from expecting reality to deliver outcomes based on incorrect anticipations, urging listeners to recognize when their models of how the world works are flawed and adjust accordingly. Ultimately, Hormozi concludes that understanding "why" things happen through behavioral science provides a more accurate worldview than relying on intuition or emotional reactions alone. He suggests that by unbundling terms into specific behaviors and reinforcing correct actions while ignoring incorrect ones, individuals can align their expectations with reality much more effectively. This mindset shift not only helps in business decisions regarding when to persist versus when to change course but also applies universally to personal growth, ensuring that people build sustainable habits rather than struggling against the natural laws of reinforcement and recovery as they age.
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Because you feel bad, it means that the
path that you're on, like you need to
change something. And so, it's equal
opposite, which is like, okay, if we
know that we're on the path getting
kicked in the nuts right now, and I know
I'm on my 17th or 100th podcast, and I'm
still not like a millionaire yet.
I I have not achieved what I want yet.
It does not mean that I have to change
course.
>> But earlier on, you said that bad
feelings, feeling bad, are important to
update the way that you're approaching
this situation. So, how do you
distinguish between the two?
>> No, and that's and that's and I'd say
what you what you hit on is is the is
the crux of it, which is judgment. Which
is like, and this is one of the hardest
ones is like, how do you help someone
recognize patterns of
when you need to
Basically, it's the eternal question of
when do I push and when do I pivot,
right? When do I push through the
hardship versus when do I adjust?
>> Am I giving up on this set in the gym
because I'm being a [ __ ] or am I
giving up because I'm about to injure
myself?
>> Yeah. And so,
>> Push up, pivot. I like that.
>> Yeah. And I've and I've worked with this
a lot because it's a pretty classic
entrepreneurship issue of like, do I
product market fit, or like, do I need
to just keep pushing? You like, you
know, where am I just trying to push up
a hill? Um is that if one of the
fundamental assumptions that you began
your quest with has been proven untrue
based on the feedback,
then that is where pivoting makes sense.
So, if you said like, I think that I'm
going to create um
a doggie skateboard because I think that
um
a lot of dog owners will want to buy
skateboards for their dog. Um We'd be
like, and I believe that the percentage
like and I would make a you know, a
billion dollars doing this. Um that
would mean that there's this size of the
market, this percentage needs to be the
take rate in order for me to get that
that market share. It's like, okay. If
if I talked to 100 dog owners and none
of them want to buy my my doggie
skateboard, I would not say that is a
push situation. I would say that is a
pivot situation because our fundamental
assumption that we started this quest
with is false. And so, we need to take
that feedback and then pivot. If
as we're going through, they're saying
I maybe but like I don't know what you
have in your hands. What the hell is
that? So it's like the assumption is not
proven but it's more of an execution
issue. And so it's like okay, I just
need to get better. I need to push
through. But it's like it is definitely
one of the harder
lines to to know like where when should
I push when should I pivot? What lesson
do I learn from losing?
Because losing losing
teaches you [ __ ]
And we just need to make sure that we
learn the right thing.
Like teaching will occur.
>> Yes.
>> [laughter]
>> Whether you take it away or not is
>> Yeah.
>> It's the it's the
I I hired my first employee and he was a
a [ __ ] ass. Therefore, all employees
suck. Right. So like losing will teach
you something. It's just want to make
sure that we learn the right lesson.
>> I feel like this is a justification for
making early decisions as right as
possible.
>> Oh, 100%.
>> To try and avoid that PTSD of
it's far easier to learn something than
it is to unlearn something. Probably 100
times easier to learn something than it
is to unlearn something. If you've
drilled a particular habit particular
bad habit, if you have come up with a
mode of interacting with your employees
or the world because all of your
employees the first three employees you
get all of them [ __ ] you over.
>> Mhm.
>> And then finally you get to the fourth,
you have to unlearn all of the
compensatory mechanisms that you built
on the first three.
Now that you've got someone who's worthy
of that and you're restricting that
progress, you're slowing everything
down, you're being hyper vigilant it
doesn't feel like a good place to work.
Try and make your early decisions right.
>> Yeah. Changing a behavior with a long
history of reinforcement is harder than
changing one with
>> No history. You're such a hardcore
behaviorist.
>> Yeah. Well, I mean it's the only thing
that's made sense to me in the world.
Like it's I mean it's the
>> It's an uphill.
>> I mean it's just I don't even
It's just
my reality. So I'll say differently like
many people do not get what they want.
They look up at their lives and they're
like this is not what I want." And so,
if you don't have what you want, it
means that the model that you view the
world through is incorrect or you have
the correct model and the incorrect
variables or insufficient variables.
It's basically all it is.
And so, for me, the more I have looked
purely at inputs and outputs,
the more I've gotten my predictions
correct. And so, I have been super
reinforced for using this style of of of
thinking and so, I do it more. And so,
it's just And like I I I I read some of
my old stuff and I'm like, "Oh, man,
like I could have said this in half as
much words if I Now, I cuz it's
understanding why.
Like at the most basic level, it's just
understanding why. Um
I'll give an example. And I think this
is why the vast majority of the world
like walks around confused,
which is I don't have what I want. That
didn't go the way I expected. She took
that worse than I thought. So, you're
you're constantly surprised by reality.
And so, in in a simple sentence like,
"Johnny stole because he's dishonest,"
right? Most people nod their heads and
be like, "Yeah, Johnny stole because
he's dishonest." But we say, "What What
does dishonest mean?" Dishonest means
it's a label, right? That we ascribe to
somebody who does a series of different
behaviors, one of which is stealing. And
so, if we were to restate that sentence
with the broken-down definition, it
would then be, "Johnny stole because
he's the type of person who steals,"
which is circular and makes no sense.
Because the real reason that Johnny
stole is because he's been reinforced
for stealing in the past or he saw
someone
who got reinforced for stealing and then
modeled their behavior. That is why
Johnny stole.
And so, because of that basic
misunderstanding, most people have these
words that they use to explain the
reality that they don't actually
understand, and as a result, reality
fools them more often than it should. He
was rewarded for it. Or he was punished
for doing the opposite of Exactly. And
so, um that basic that like And that
what I just explained is the is the
difference between description and
explanation,
um which is relatively heady and I think
difficult sometimes to grasp, but is at
the most basic level like
my worldview.
>> This is what happened. This is why it
happened.
>> Why? Yeah. And so, from that one kind of
basic understanding, everything else can
kind of pretty much get laddered up.
And so, um
said differently, if
if I wanted to tell a child
get good at basketball, right? Um I
would
not tell him
get better at basketball.
Because a 5-year-old would be like, I
don't know how to do that. What does
that mean? So, I'd be like, okay, well,
let's break it down. We've got
dribbling, passing, shooting. Okay.
Do that. A little bit closer, but they
still probably don't know how to. If I
say, go get better at dribbling,
passing, and shooting. Still can't do
anything with that.
Until eventually be like, okay, passing.
So, I want you to take a step with your
left foot towards the the person, and I
want you to extend your elbows, and
finish with your thumbs down.
Um and if the ball goes towards them in
the direction that they're running, and
they catch it, you've passed
successfully. And then I would repeat
that chain of events until eventually
they would understand that that chain of
behaviors equals passing. And if they do
it a lot, and they hit the target many
times, they would be good at passing.
And we'd repeat that all the way down
until they're good at passing,
dribbling, shooting, etc. And then
eventually we'd describe them as a good
basketball player. But that basic
unbundling and rebundling of terms is
why I think the vast majority of people
are wildly um
confused by what's going on around them.
Is that someone says, why don't you love
me?
And he's like, what are you talking
about? He's like, I pay the bills, I
take out the trash. Like, you know, like
what do you want from me? And she says,
uh like you don't tell me I'm pretty,
you don't hug me,
uh
like you don't listen to me when I when
I you don't ever ever ask me how my
day's going. And it's because for her
she defines love in these behaviors, and
he defines love in these behaviors, and
so then they fight forever, rather than
just saying like, what does that mean?
What does that mean? Um we had uh we had
two employees
that were arguing about something uh at
acquisition and one was like, "Hey, can
you
um I would be fine if you were just like
kind and polite to me."
And um I was like, "Okay.
What does that mean?"
And uh
there was obviously a moment of like
hesitation there cuz it's like, "Okay,
so you want the other person to guess
what you think in your mind means good
behavior, but you've never articulated
it and so you want them to guess and
somehow get it right."
>> Mhm.
>> And so finally it just was like, "Can
you ask more questions rather than
making more statements?" And the person
was like, "Yeah, sure." It's like,
"Great." But that basic thing now and
they're fine now and everything's great.
And so but like this is why I I view the
world and behavior because I have wanted
things,
but I didn't know how to get them,
which is happens in reality. And so as
long as I live in reality,
I prefer to define things through
reality and then reality tends to behave
far more as I predicted it would.
>> On the
I want you to do this, but I didn't tell
you it's that Neil Strauss line,
unspoken expectations are premeditated
resentment.
>> [laughter]
>> Why didn't you do this thing that I
didn't tell you to do?
>> Yeah, probably not deliberately cuz I
think a lot of people do it not on
purpose.
>> Of course, but it's a uh
unconscious premeditated resentment. The
the investment that you are making will
be a resentment in future that you
aren't aware is about to come about.
>> Yeah. Another thing on the uh
people's map of reality is inaccurate.
I think one of the most obvious
realizations that you can have when you
hear somebody who complains a lot is
that their framework of reality is
incorrect.
>> Oh, by a mile.
>> A complaint is you saying, "Why is
reality not delivering that to me which
I anticipated?"
>> Yeah.
>> And reality doesn't care. Reality is
just going to continue to deliver to you
that which it is giving.
Why is there all of this traffic on the
way to work? There shouldn't be all of
this traffic. I didn't anticipate all of
this traffic.
>> Yeah.
>> I assumed there wouldn't be traffic.
Reality disagreed with me. Reality is
not wrong.
>> It's undefeated.
>> Reality is undefeated, yeah. It's a
million and oh.
>> [laughter]
>> A million TKOs.
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