Wrestling Games are a hilarious mess

Hey there friends. How's it going? My name is Kevin and today we're taking a look at wrestling games. We're going to be looking at the newest wrestling game. I don't understand how a series that releases every year can be this messed up. And I'm not even talking about the wrestling. As soon as I get to the main menu, I am baffled. The island. What is the island? Yeah, this really this really clarifies things. Thank you. I think this is because I put it in creator mode and a lot of games have a creator mode where it disables copyright music, but this just turned off all the audio with any music. I guess we're going to go with the order of shadows. She really convinced me in that intro screen. Her sign language was clearly the strongest. A wrestler is 6'11, 600 lb. You do not have enough VC to make this purchase. What are you talking about? I'm just making a character. Get VC. What do you mean I have to pay more? This game was a fullpriced game. I just want to make a character. I want to go to the island. Whatever the island is. The total cost is 17,500 VC. I'd have to spend €10 just to make my character rated 77. Undo. Undo. All right, we'll just be default then. Face photo capture. Oh, hell yeah. Wait, who are these people? I thought it'd be my face. I thought I agreed to that in the terms and conditions. Okay, this is kind of cool. I like the character creation. I'll give them that. And I didn't even have to pay extra to change his eyebrow. Yeah. Making him into a regular Picasso. One that fell off the side of a truck. Oh, no. That's not what I wanted to do. Hold on. No, this I I thought the rotate controls were telling me how to rotate him, you know. Accept. Yeah, that's right. I accept him for what he is. Create a superstar with a blended body. Achievement unlocked. What do you mean? What do you mean? Stretch marks. It's the hallmark of a good wrestler, I assume. I don't actually watch a lot of wrestling. Oh god, I just accepted him for what he is. Oh no. Now he's going to think it's okay to just exist like that. The hell? Why am I out in public? What's wrong with my ass? Who the hell are you? Wait, are there other multiplayer people in here? Are people going to perceive me? I didn't count on that. Oh, that was cool. Check this out. Oh, they're disconnected. I understand. Prestige your game. What does that mean? You showed up to fight for your order on this island, but if you want to make a real impact in the ring, you're going to want to raise your prestige. Well, actually, it said you showed up to fight for your order on this island, but if want to make a real impact in the ring, you're going to want to raise your prestige. Thanks, buddy. Appreciate that. Appreciate your grammar. How do I get to the Order of Shadows? I'd ask another player, but there's no one else here. Let's get a tattoo. Oh, wait. They all need real money. Okay, let's leave the store. Let's get some clothes. Oh, they all require real money. All right, let's leave the store. Finally, I found the Order of Shadows. >> Dolores told me we should be expecting a new initiate. >> The size difference. You definitely look like you might belong here. >> Thanks. I appreciate that. I'm just looking to fit in. It's never happened before. I've always been drawn to the dark. >> We should have a match first. >> Yeah, let's do that. One v one me. >> Can't wait to see how you do. >> Thanks. That made my guy pretty happy. I assume the camera is just zoomed on his stomach the whole time. Puny human. This guy thinks he's a wrestler. Why is he walking away from me? He's scared or something. I'm Dolores Hex. >> We just spoke. Why are you introducing yourself? >> Did we? >> Did we? She says as if you could forget this guy's face. >> You can change into something better here in the locker room. >> Nice. And it won't even cost me money, right? Let's see what accessorizing I can do. Oh, I can name him. His name right now is just superstar. We're going to name him Big Baby. His nickname is the baby. First name baby, second name the baby, last name babe. Therefore, his full name is the baby baby. The baby babe. It's like you're having a stroke. Menu screen pose. Yeah, I like it. I like that confidence. Damn, I like the these animations. It's like he's in a boy band posing for the album cover. I like that one a lot. That one's a good one. Oh, yeah. You think you're a wrestler? Well, can you do this? And he is from Yemen. Nothing funny about that. Just trying to appeal to my core demographics here. I changed all of his fan signs to the same one. Like they're all protesting that he's there. All right. Now, let's accessorize. The best part about wrestling. I had some belly hair. Those go well with the veins. And I got myself a tattoo that looks like I put a stencil on myself and went out in the sun. I'll give him a set of new teeth for the match. Does my ass look big in this? Yeah, probably. Okay, I'm ready. Now that's a pose. No, not her. me. Oh Jesus. One of his eyes kind of sticks out. Oh god. >> I got to be honest, guys. Dolores creeps. >> Stop it. It's my first day. Hold on. Stop it. What are you doing? Oh my god, his face. All right, let's just get out of here and put our differences aside for a second. Oh god, she's following. She's following. She can't resist following that. >> Oh yes, this is where my body weight comes in handy. >> Yeah, that's my special move now. I just got to keep her busy. No, no, no, no. Come back. No, no, no, no. Come back. This was my whole plan. Wait, I'm out of stamina. I'm really tired. >> Oh my god. Is she dead? What is she doing? This girl's weird, man. Please stop that. You're making me uncomfortable. >> And he's basically defenseless right now. >> Yeah, he's just a baby. >> Not in the stomach. He's all bloated. Stop it. I'm out of here. I'm done with your your inappropriate. No, stop leaving on me. Stop it. How are you doing this? So, I guess the answer to what is the island is it's a place that they beat up babies. That's really sad. I'm hyping up the crowd. >> This is just someone saying I am the alpha in this match. >> Yeah, I'm the alpha in this match. >> Pinfalls. No, I don't want to counter this. I feel like for everyone's sake, this should end. And that'll be it. >> Is he okay? I can't even see him over his tummy. >> And here's a look back at some of the action from the previous match. >> No. No. Don't make me watch it again. >> Here is your winner. >> Yeah, you beat up a baby. Get over it. I don't know how to escape the island. I want to go back to the menu, but it won't let me. Oh, wait. Exit the island. Nice. I just wanted to swap game mode, but instead I was stuck picking my factions and opening random packs and unable to get to the actual game for two whole minutes. The comeback. So, this is a different story mode. I had to make a different character. They're actually related. They're long lost brothers and also cousins. >> There you are. I've been looking for you all day. >> Yeah, I'm a hard one to spot. My hand feels like it's about to fall off after signing about 1,000 8 by10s. >> Yeah, no one believes you. >> I'm ready to show them what dad can do in the ring. >> Don't call yourself dad, please. Why are all three of you just staring at me? He pretended to look away when I looked at him. >> Yeah, that's right. They're hyped. Oh, I can use the pyro techniques. Yes, >> so obnoxious. It just keeps exploding. >> Not going to be any question about who's champ after this. >> Is it that guy? He's the belt. Yeah, it must be that guy. Congratulations, buddy. >> Here we go. It's the Raw after Wrestlemania. Okay. >> Last time I picked flight. This time I'm going to pick fight. >> Wrestling's hard, man. I don't know what to tell you. Oh, what is it now? This game is trying to be everything, but also they're not telling me anything cuz the music's off. It takes so long to browse all the community creations, which are awesome. You got every wrestler you'd want from Markiplier to Freddy Fazbear, but it's just so damn slow. Like, look at this. I'm just loading one page. Reward ready. Oh my god. No. I I just can't be bothered, man. There's too much going on there. Wow, what a poster. Look at that paper crowd in the background. They're going absolutely mild. One thing I never get about these games is that the crowd is always so bad. It's one of the only things in your game. How is the crowd still bad? Look at them. Some of them are absolutely freaking out in sync with others, by the way. And some of them are sitting there like absolutely nothing is going on. randomly. Some of them just stand up there and hold their hand up, which I don't understand at all. It's like they're asking to go to the bathroom and then it looks like they all collectively need to use the bathroom at the same time and they're slowly raising their hand. I don't know. Maybe it's to do with the wrestler. I I don't know anything about wrestling. This whole game is a fever dream and I want to wake up. >> Okay, hold on. He's He's taking this seriously. I can't even see through this mask. I've got backup. I picked the Green Goblin as my manager. >> Hey, stop it. Friendly fire. >> Oh, sorry for the friendly fire. >> Yeah, now this is wrestling. >> What am I doing? What am I doing? He's too slippy. I can't pin him. Sorry, William. Defo is not the friend. Oh, that seemed personal, too. >> Who put those thumbtacks there? I got this bag of money. >> Oh, come on. Not the thumbtacks. >> Wait, hold on. It's full of thumbtacks and I just poured them everywhere. Found more thumbtacks. There goes your eyesight. Oh, he got me more thumbtacks. Thank you. Hand them over. There we go. I'm just littering. I'm such a bad boy. >> And got it. >> Wait, what the hell? Oh my god. Rocky killed Freddy Fazbear. >> Here is your winner. >> Boo. Boo. Out of all the struggles I've had to go through in this game, everything I have to endure, the worst thing is that I've now realized I cannot see my baby. They have kidnapped him and confined him to the island. I can't use him in any other mode. So, we're going back to the island to save my baby. Like, look at these oldies. They ain't got a chance. I got youth on my side. Youth and looks. Like, he's even got the the rock eyebrow there. He's going to be huge. Well, he is huge, but he's going to be famous. The island is just product placement and microtransactions. Like for real, I want to dress up my baby, make him all pretty. Well, prettier than he is. But I can't even afford a haircut. A haircut costs 9,000 coins. After all I've been through, I have 975 coins. I guess it doesn't help that everything has to be custom fit to this unique body. I do appreciate the craftsmanship on the glasses, even if they do look like they were just thrown on the ground and bent out of shape. And yes, all the hair is off. Those marks on the top of his head are actually scars. He was dropped on his head a lot as a baby. And by that, I mean, he is continuously dropped on his head in current day. Like, he's still a baby. That's why he is the dent, too. I did buy him a black belt, though. I figure the extra karate skills could come in handy. >> I got to be honest, guys. Okay, we're off to a terrible start. Let me just take a second there. All right. What did I learn from Freddy Fazbear? >> Take things one step at a time. >> That's it. I'll hit her with one step at a time. >> What? What do you mean disqualified? Why would Freddy Fazbear do this? No, don't replay it. I don't need to see me getting disqualified again. So, I kept fighting this woman over and over again, and my baby started to learn. He started to learn that he is a very big baby and I was using that to my advantage. I just kept hitting her and hitting her and hitting her and stepping on her and eventually I got the W. I finally got to hear the announcer say his full name. >> Here is your winner, the baby baby. The baby. >> It's perfect. But the game didn't explain anything and was like, "No, do it again." And so I went back there and I did it again. >> That'll be a win. >> And I lost in under a minute. And so I did it again. And this time I got the W again. But the game was like, "No, you're going to have to do it again." And this time I got to a certain point and the screen went black. A little cutscene played and I was beginning to understand the lore. You see, Dolores is actually two people. They're twins. And that's when the twin came in. And so whatever I did must have triggered the cutscene to allow the twin to come in and beat me and pass the mission. I got to watch this big long celebration of Dolores winning. And then the game's like, "No, do it again. Fight her again." >> I got to be honest, guys. >> And so I did it again. And it was honestly a crazy fight. A lot of back and forth, but it was some of the best baby wrestling I've ever seen. And I had her on the ropes. I had her just where I wanted her. And weirdly, I kind of predicted the future cuz after kneing her in the face and doing a unfortunately angled celebration scene, she disappeared. >> Where'd she go? Where's Dolores? >> And her twin came in. >> Dolores out of nowhere. >> And my baby got defeated in a cutscene. After winning twice and losing about five times, I had finally lost in the right way to allow the game to continue. >> You're headed into the scrapyard. >> That's right. Dolores sent me over here. She thought I would suit an extreme no rules wrestling match in a scrapyard. This is the big baby's home, the scrapyard. All right, you guys fight in the ring. I'm going to play with some random toys I find in the scrapyard. Oh, look, a shopping cart. Get out of my way. I want to play pretend. Yeah, I'm going shopping just like my parents do. I don't know why I have a cart when I have all this wagon. Anyway, I'm out of stamina and she's kind of catching off. Can you just leave me be? I'm just a baby. I'm just a kid. Ouch. Why are you punching me in the back? You can't punch a baby in the back. In fact, punching a baby anywhere is frowned upon. Wait, he he's stealing my cart. You see what you've done? Oh god, he's chasing me. He's chasing me with the cart. Oh god, I'll go in the corner. Yeah, that's right. You've reached your checkout point. >> Scoop out the green. >> Oh god. Now I'm stuck in the corner with the car. Oh no. No. No. Please leave me alone. I'm playing dead. All right. They're they're distracted with each other now. Climb the ladder. I got to be able to climb this right. Yes. Yeah. Come on up. You ever see a baby play a guitar? Oh. Oh god. Oh no. No. No. No. No. We're up really high. We're up really, really high. I'm playing dead again. I was going to say, why is he always in the most uncomfortable and unfortunate angles, but I don't know if he has a good angle. I got no object permanence. I assume if I'm behind the table and can't see them, they can't see me. They think they've been hit by a ghost. Oh god, they're getting up. They're getting up. I got to get out of here. What is this game? Oh, Jesus. They're following me. They're trying to climb up here. How can you hate a baby this much? Well, I hope you enjoyed your climb because Oh, you've come all the way over. Well, whoa, an elevator. Why haven't we just been using this? Oh, that's super convenient. What's in here? Just a curious little baby. That's all I'm exploring. Oh no. Oh god, they found me. It's the one unfortunate thing about Big Baby. He's not very easy to hide. But he's really good at climbing. But where do I go now? What? Big Baby. Big baby. What the hell, man? I just raged. He is such a brave baby. Wait, what the hell? Why did he I know you could say, "Why did I do it?" But why did he follow me? If Big Baby jumped off a cliff, would you follow him? >> Wait, now she fell down, too. As I said, I'm a curious baby, so let's run some tests. All right, he's followed me over. And if I go over here Yeah. Yeah. You want to go down that way? You can't take the elevator, can you? And he's on the ground. I'm going back up. >> Oh, you just missed the elevator. That's so unfortunate. The thud when they fall. You're almost here. You almost got me. Just keep climbing. Oh, I'm so weak and vulnerable. I'm just a baby. Uh-oh. Oh god. Oh no. No. No. No. No. No. No. No. No. That must have been an awkward elevator ride. At least that guy fell down. Oh god, I gone back up with her. All right, this is getting too awkward. Down you go. Oh, good balance. But I am not a nice baby. See you later. And you, too. I'll see you later. Maybe you can find another way down. Yeah, that was honestly much faster. Watch. >> Wa, that is a powerful spring. I feel like a Roman emperor looking down on my subjects fighting and occasionally body slamming them right. I've gotten him weak for you. Big baby away. >> He has been eliminated. My strategy is working. I'm not sure what my strategy is, but it's working. Yep. That's some fun wrestling, big baby. And now that I've made her fall repeatedly, I'll repeatedly fall on her. There you go. Big baby has found his place in the scrapyard. Throwing my baby in the scrapyard. If that's not a happy ending, I don't know what is. Like and subscribe, everyone. I hope to see you next