World suicide prevention month

All right, good morning. Welcome back. Hashtag is still in the morning. My good name is James. You can find me on social media, James. Remember, find our social media page at 254 channel. Now, we are going to to talk about a topic that has been surrounded by a lot of stigma. This is a very delicate topic to talk about cuz we have seen uh things happening out uh in Kenya. Let's say a few a few weeks ago we lost two stupid boy cuz uh we lost him by suicide. Remember what happened cuz he had been suffering for a while now and I did not even speak out about it. But apart from that you're going even to talk more about mental health more about how men are affected by this. Why are men losing lives to uh because of mental health issues? Why have they not speaking out about them? And in the studio I'm joined here by Moshu MD Jro who's going to dive more and also explain to me he's an artist. I know he has the the type of art uh I want to do a music tech music and also stand up comedy any type of entertainment as art. So I know you're going to get a lovely conversation also know more about his story in this in this um compared to what we are going to talk about today. So Kiban good morning. >> Yeah thank you James. >> Mhm. Glad to have you here. Yeah, mine. [laughter] >> Okay, let's start by who is Moshua MD0? Maybe the for viewers out there maybe person who seeing you today who is Mo. >> Uh I don't want to sound poetic but I would say >> if you can sound poetic [laughter] I can say MDiru is a work of art >> and he's an artist in progress. >> Mhm. >> So MDU does standup comedy. He writes books. >> He writes poetry. >> He has not performed poetry yet, but he has been writing poetry. >> And now Moshua is now the mental health advocate. >> Mhm. >> So Moshu comes from combining two names >> that is Moses and Joshua. >> Mhm. >> Moses because I've been in the wilderness and it's the wilderness of suicide and suicidal thoughts. >> Yeah. Then I realized just like Moses, >> I've been called >> Mhm. >> to come and give hope to the people and walk people through the wilderness because I've lived in the wilderness for many years. >> Belie >> then I realized that Moses >> doesn't reach the promised land. >> Mhm. >> We have seen mental health advocates. >> Yeah. when forefront [clears throat] >> even the person who who was among a a petitioner who who who petitioned suicide claim in Kenya >> Mhm. >> she died of suicide. May she rest in peace. >> Mhm. >> We have lost servants of God. >> Mhm. >> Pastors, priests, imams, no one is above the program if I can use that word. True. >> So I realized that >> Mhm. As much as several tips I can share with people, I'm also prone. Remember >> the predictor of the next suicide attempt is a suicide attempt combined. So Moses because it's because I'm coming from the wilderness but >> okay >> just because Okay. Amazing. Amazing. Now September being a suicide prevention month is as a topic that has been of discussion I think in the recent times compared to what we had uh beginning but suicide is normally uh let's say a word that is confused by many by many meanings what do we mean by when we say suicide let's say cuz I think I believe suicide as is a broad-based >> type of topic cuz there's passive type of suicide there even that is about thinking about it then there going to to executing it and also even to the point of surviving. Now as a person who has been interacted with a lot of people maybe how does it relate to you? >> So suicide is both a verb >> and it's a noun. >> People can check it out on the dictionary or Google. >> Mhm. >> So someone can be suicidal. >> Mhm. >> So it starts with being suicidal. So someone has the thoughts >> just like you said >> the passive being passive. Yeah. So someone can have their thoughts but they're not acting on them. >> So >> they think about it but our jam it's when >> or it's how >> they will [clears throat] execute it. So that is passive suicide ideation passive suicide suicidal thoughts. >> Yeah. >> Then when now someone sets a date >> and next week >> I'll do it. I do it and I will use this means I'm from being passive to active suicide ideation active suicidal thoughts >> then >> still on that there's a book called suicide and attempted suicides I would recommend everyone to read it by Joe Stone it talk it talks about >> suicide attempt >> and [clears throat] suicide gesture >> now suicide gesture is someone is using someone is executing the suicide but they don't want to die. >> Mhm. >> It's a cry for help. >> Mhm. >> You get the point? So most of the time these people not use a little method >> or even if they use a method the timing >> okay let me explain it in in perspective. Mhm. >> Early 25 >> I saw a video of a guy I guess it was from rooftop. >> Mhm. >> So that's the method. >> Mhm. >> But then there was someh guys >> they were speaking but I could hear them telling this guy jump fast will catch you. It's not fair. You run fast. >> Mhm. >> So most people take that as a suicide attempt. >> But having read that book by Stone, >> that was a suicide gesture [clears throat] because if this person really wanted to die, they could have come. But they wanted someone to talk to them >> also the timing. Maybe >> now we go to attempt. Suicide [clears throat] attempt is where someone whatever means they are using >> they desperately want to die. >> Mhm. >> Now in his book talks about there are people who want to die now in their attempt. >> Mhm. >> Unfortunately they don't die. >> Mhm. >> So they will end up living with maybe injuries the psychological stigma what have you trauma and everything. >> Then there are people who don't want to die. They're using people who don't want to die but they end up >> dying. >> Uhhuh. >> Yeah. So >> it's a wall based broad conversation. Now what? >> And then another thing I would add when I'm talking I know it can't appear in cups. I wish [laughter] the voice could appear in cups. Mhm. >> Not everybody who takes their life >> Mhm. >> has an underlying mental health issue. >> Not everybody who takes their life has an underlying mental health issue. >> Mhm. >> And not everyone who has an underlying mental health issue >> will take their lives. >> Mhm. You know so I know suicide in people it's inter suicide and mental health but there are people who will take their life but they don't have any mental health issues and there are people who >> have mental health issues >> and they don't take >> and they don't take their life although >> some mental health issues >> Mhm. like bipolar, schizophrenia, major depressive episodes, they make people to be more prone to suicide. But that doesn't mean everybody with an underlying mental health issue will end up taking their life. >> Sure. A good explanation. Now talking about some of the mental issues as you mentioned are affecting affecting a lot of let's say young people also in the older generation but they have been neglected a lot. things like bipolar in Kenya. It's not a topic that of people pay a lot of attention to. But do you think we have come to a point where we are realizing these things exist and these things need these type of conversation so that we can create this type of awareness to the to the old generation maybe youth or maybe the millennials. >> Yeah. >> Mhm. >> Yeah. So I thank God we are living in an information world right now. Information is readily available. I'll take you back a bit when I had my attempt. >> Mhm. >> And I like to cry. It was my last attempt there words. >> I remember searching the internet and okay I'm a bit old [laughter] but is for youth. >> Yeah. >> From next week the age I'm turning past the youth. [laughter] >> So I was searching the net. I remember searching where do troubled souls go to? >> There's no so much information and everything. >> Mhm. >> And fast forward I remember reading somewhere >> the book you'd love to read and [clears throat] it's not there. Maybe you're the one who supposed to >> to write it. So fast forward I wrote a book on >> on on how to deal with depression, anxiety and suicidal thoughts. Mhm. >> And just a month ago, 2 months ago, >> after after a long period after starting my publishing house called Maktaba Digital, >> Mhm. >> I published a book for a guy called Samueling. >> It's called Bipolar, Hypersexuality and Grace. >> So what [clears throat] am I trying to say? Bipolar and that is volume one. Volume 2 is coming out next month. >> Mhm. [clears throat] >> You get but 10 years ago, not even 10 years, 5 years ago, there was no any book on bipolar written by a Kenyan. >> Yeah. >> Now there is that. >> And there is another friend of mine, a man must cry. Mhm. >> So many people are in the space even what's happening now >> this is a space where information is being given >> for free to many [laughter] so we are living in a we are living at such a wonderful time like information is readily readily available >> so okay I think it's Okay. So, what was the question again? >> I was asking about still on the right track. I was asking about have we gotten to a point where these topics are getting their attention that they should they should be discerning. >> Pardon? >> Uh we have gotten to a point where topics like mental health discussion like the things like bipolar getting to a point where the awareness is being created about them and we are also the attention that they deserve and also the talking about the whole topic in a general they are getting the attention they should deserve. >> Yeah. So says the attention is there on the on what should be addressed and everything. >> Information is readily available. >> Mhm. >> And say what we need >> Mhm. >> is not even more information. >> Mhm. >> And I don't want to sound preachy. >> Mhm. >> What we need is a change of heart. >> Mhm. >> You know, it's just like let the children go. >> Mhm. Mhm. >> Even without the information, for example, >> you find like that rooftop. >> Mhm. >> What more do you need? What more information do you need? You're like, this person is about to jump. >> Mhm. >> But people are like, >> Mhm. >> Two years ago, I went to it somewhere and there was this guy. I'm suicidal. >> Mhm. the men who are around. [clears throat] >> So information but we we need a change of heart. >> Yeah. >> The information can be there. It's like pure corruption. >> We know those places corruption. We don't tolerate corruption. >> We have all that information. >> We know like cops should not take bribes. >> Yeah. But they take >> you get so there like >> one life lost >> is too many lives lost. >> Yeah. >> So change of heart talking about change of all these conversations circle back to men. Why are men being affected more so by this type of a conversation? Because I think moreo is a stigma. Why are men not really talking about their feelings? Why not men talking about what they are going through in daily life even compared to now the scarcity of jobs? Let's say scarcity of jobs even um the normal the normal challenges of life driving people to even to that type of point. So why is it affecting the men more so more compared to how it is affecting the women? >> So I'll start with Women are more women think more about suicide than men. >> In fact, four times the number of women than men attempt suicide. >> Mhm. >> Four times the number of women than men attempt suicide. >> But who die by suicide more? It's four times the number of men I mean in some cases three times the number of men >> Mhm. >> than women die by suicide. >> Mhm. >> You remember suicide gesture and suicide >> attempt. >> Yeah. >> So women >> when they attempt you know it's a cry for help. Few people want to die. >> Few people want to die. >> Many people want the pain to end. >> Many people want the frustration to end. Many people want the disappointment to end. Mhm. >> Many people they are just lonely. >> They want to feel they are seen, they are hard. >> Mhm. >> But people resort to suicide. >> Mhm. >> So women will use non-lethal methods. >> They will use pills and other methods. >> But men, you know, men when they do things, men naturally are risk takers. >> They go all in. >> Mhm. So they'll jump from rooftops. They will even nowadays men have become more creative. >> They go drinking au they they drive and they run into into a into a road and people are like ah he died in a car crash. >> It was suicide but under a creative means. >> So one it's because of the method used. Mhm. >> Secondly, it's because men for men there's no space for being quote unquote weak. >> Mhm. >> I've been inst I've been in instances like someone said other men >> there was that man on the rooftop the people who are saying jump it's other men. >> Mhm. >> I'm not a psychologist. >> Mhm. Like I'm MD that's not for a medical doctor. >> Yeah. In as much as I can give people world best medicine which is laughter. >> Mhm. >> And people if they don't laugh at my jokes they I usually go and tick them and they laugh. Anyway, >> that said, this is my hypothesis. >> The reason why men want other men dead. [clears throat] Mhm. Remember as humans we are still animals quot. >> Yeah. >> So there is the human there is the human male >> and there is the human man. >> Mhm. >> So the male is the animal. So we we usually fight for resources >> subconsciously. >> No. So we fight for like clients. We fight for for mates. >> Mhm. >> We fight for territory. >> Mhm. >> So subconsciously when you see another man jumping from rooftop >> and maybe [clears throat] ourselves >> like that's a weak man. >> Mhm. >> So it it make us feel better. >> Mhm. >> Subconsciously. >> Mhm. >> And that's why men will continue will continue to die by suicide as other men are >> are watching. Mhm. >> We will not want to see someone else dying by by suicide. So it's more of a subconscious thing like the way they say like when you see a mad person dancing in the market >> it's funny until now it becomes a family member. >> Yeah. >> So doesn't you concern you that's a brother that's a son that's a a dad. Yeah. So you know women can exist on their own. >> Mhm. Women ladies like they can go for lunch out. In fact, I saw a postal date between >> between their friends. >> So women when they want to have fun, >> they can have fun on their own. A woman can live here. I need I need a man for the vacation to be legit. >> But a man [laughter] get. So men also like but women in fact an organization that I work with in it resource center at Olympic >> so it's a space for men >> so there was a time we were it was only men who were coming then there's another organization part organization akir bomba >> mhm and come for the group therapy and they had intense were ladies. >> Mhm. You get the point? So subconsciously men >> would men want other men >> dead. >> Mhm. >> Also one man >> Mhm. >> One man is enough to biologically. >> Yeah. >> One man is enough to to impregnate the a whole village. >> Make sense. So the man >> we don't need many men if it makes sense. >> We don't need your point many [clears throat] men. So that's why if you don't need many men to eliminate menide it's a way to try to eliminate people. >> This another thing that I've discovered >> maybe the people who do studies they can do it and or verify. >> Mhm. Most young people they don't have families like men most young men when they don't have kids they more prone to suicide but once they become dads >> the the the suicidality the dog so maybe it's nature tend to protect these people now that you have offsprings to take care of >> yeah responsibilities >> responsibility but before mating remember survival for the fittest. So this is the thing. >> Mhm. >> It's the it's the quote unquote the the best person from the the jeans >> and the best person. If they will give up, if they will give up as good >> so many dimension >> to it. >> Mhm. >> Yeah. >> And don't you think maybe the way we were raised as men are to be to be tough every time? don't feelings like a better place in life. So do you think combining how you were raised then the hardship that you go throughout in life that that what that what makes men out here not even get to a point where they can talk about their feelings they can express how they feeling cuz now you seem like you're weak cuz you're not you're not really you're not really persevering whatever you're going through. Yeah. Yeah. So there's that men are not supposed to be to appear weak. >> Yeah. So men are not supposed to appear weak. Men are not supposed to express their emotions. >> So combined with that and What I would tell fellow men out there, >> there is hope. [clears throat] >> You don't have to talk to everyone. You just need one person. >> Mhm. >> Who you can confined >> into. Then I have another friend of mine colleagues. He's a therapist. I call him saying if you're looking for help >> imagine there are people 844 advance or masters they are trained just to sit and listen to you >> just to walk with you the the path so as a man yes I know we don't want to appear weak but go for therapy >> no >> go for therapy find someone you can confine in not everyone because remember as a man you going through easy to hardships. >> Mhm. >> You don't want to confined in the wrong person you are now more vulnerable. So just find someone just one person who you can then there are other ways there are other ways that as a man you can you can express your emotions. >> Yeah. >> You don't have to go tell someone. >> Mhm. >> You can choose to write whatever you're going through. >> Mhm. >> You need an outlet. >> Mhm. [clears throat] >> No, you need an outlet. I remember watching a video of Michael Jackson saying that if what would happen if he was never allowed to perform if he never had an outlet >> Mhm. >> you definitely take his life like you die like he need an outlet. So every one of us even if you're not a performing artist every one of us >> we are an artist we are an artist. >> So we need to we need an outlet. We need a release. So take a piece of paper, take a book, write what you are going through, >> burn it. >> Write what you going through. If you live near liver, you need the paper, throw it. >> But you need to to something you you need to let it out. >> Then as a man, another thing is you need to have a sense of purpose. >> Mhm. When I had my last attempt, >> looking back, what really lacked was a sense of purpose. >> I didn't know my purpose. >> Mhm. >> And many years later, my life never got better. >> Life gets better. No. >> Mhm. >> Life gets easy. No. >> Mhm. Looking back, I was attempting I was doing my attempt my life has not gotten better >> financially. It's It hasn't gotten better. >> Mhm. >> I've just gotten better. Mimi, not life. >> Mhm. >> So, if you have a sense of purpose, the sense of purpose will carry you as a man. >> Mhm. You get >> a man. There are two things. There are two greatest antidotes to suicide. Two. And one is dangerous. The other one you're the safest. >> The dangerous one. >> The greatest antidote and which is the most dangerous one >> is love. Love. like okay I not ask personal questions but that's why you are the Mhm. >> Gives you a purpose also gives you the motivation that you need. >> It gives you a purpose. It makes you feel powerful doing hard labor and I'm doing it for my family, for my wife and kids. >> That love >> love made a big castle. >> Mhm. love me people were going to war. So love is the greatest antidote. >> Unfortunately it's dangerous because for example in Lord Egaton's case >> Mhm. >> he was rejected by that lady. >> Oh my. >> Even after building that castle the lady was like I can't live in a chicken coupe. >> And [clears throat] that guy was like >> never will a woman step in this place. For many years, no woman ever stepped at even worked there at the Lord Castle. >> So love is powerful, but love is beyond us. >> Mhm. >> You need another person, >> Cind to like the [clears throat] love. >> Mhm. >> So that's why it's dangerous. >> Mhm. >> And the other person maybe I can stop loving you. That's why you find men when they realize their wife is cheating on them, their girlfriend is cheating on them, >> they end up taking their lives. >> True. >> They end up murdering these women. >> Mhm. [clears throat] >> We end up having murder suicide and everything. >> So because so many dynamics dangerous. Now as a man >> your safe bet >> is [clears throat] a sense of purpose. A sense of purpose doesn't rely on any other person. >> And when you have a sense of purpose >> Mhm. >> Even when love corapses, >> your life doesn't corrupt. You have seen these shows uh sanitizing. This is a >> Yeah, we have come across them. >> You see how men cry? Yeah. I didn't come. >> Yeah. >> You get seen. >> So if now picture this >> if out of love and you want Yeah. But how we improve then >> when you corrupt but on this side you are improving yourself. You are working on your business. You are working on your fitness. You are working on everything else. >> Mhm. >> You all do not >> collapse. >> Collapse. >> Mhm. >> So [clears throat] men first to to search sense of purpose. >> Mhm. >> We have a meaningful life. >> Mhm. >> Then we go for love. In fact, when you are in your sense of purpose, it's even easier to attract love. When you are in love, now remember love is the highest. when you love most people sometimes after they they most men after they get married [snorts] but no one after the honeymoon I want to go to the gym >> it usually it's usually after the heartbreak so once loveed you makes sense so no one who is in as a man will start finding his sense of purpose. >> But if you find your sense of purpose, love will come to you. >> Mhm. >> Yeah. >> Find your your purpose first then the other things will come. >> Now just to rewind it back, you mentioned something spectrum about attempts that survive. Now I just want to understand what does it mean to be a survivor more so in Kenya. >> Mhm. Hey, after I survived, that was in 2013. >> Mhm. >> Many months later, I went to the to the crime scene because at that moment, suicide was a crime. >> Mhm. >> Mess up. >> Mhm. >> I just needed to know how it [clears throat] >> then at that time I went with after a period of time I went with my then girlfriend. Mhm. >> I She was like >> Mhm. And I knew you know me for apart from story for 10 plus years. >> Mhm. >> I never shared with anyone >> really. I never shared with anyone notic [clears throat] about other stuff. I would love to write even about other stuff not this topic. >> Mhm. >> It's heavy. It's draining. >> It can leave you even even suicidal. It can even leave you suicidal. >> Mhm. I think nearly have a Jonah moment in my life and was like okay Lord I surrender let me >> that is to say people will judge you. Yeah, >> people will criticize you. >> Family and friends, you could tell they were angry. >> Mhm. >> That she survived. She was in Sweden. >> The parents were like eating up in a psychiatric word >> to get job. So people people then suicide makes people feel uncomfortable. >> Yeah. >> When you die your people like they cry. When you survive they they don't know how to relate with you. >> Yeah. >> This is the thing. >> Mhm. >> If you if you have attempted >> Mhm. >> and you're not a mental health advocate, where [clears throat] can I give your story? Now I'm talking to the audience. Can I give you a story? >> Don't don't be don't don't be in a rush to talk about it. For me, I think the same I have some shock absorbers like now because I do stand upd. So if you have attempted don't don't don't don't even share with your family or friends after even don't talk don't even tell your friends now this is what happens >> I've had situations whereby the friends are like now everything for you is now through the suicidal you So if attempt it even don't share with a lot of people find a therapist you share with with with them >> process it it may take 10 years 15 years then when you are you are healed >> and it it no longer triggers you the space is not safe. >> Yeah. the space is not safe for you know I was suicidal you know I'm suicidal no no it's not still >> just take your time so before before you get to a point where you can speak about what you went through take your time first just know that you're completely ill before you get to a point where you can speak about now before because can see the time is really rushing just um get to some points maybe uh the fear of judgment you have mentioned something about being judged by the community the fear of judgment all that maybe what's the best approach for for someone maybe interacting with a person who has who has been a survivor let's let's say me interacting with you what's the best approach one can get in order to understand the other person perspective so the best approach is listen >> and listen without judgment >> then be a safe space >> then I don't want to sound spooky But you know we are we are spiritual beings. >> Yeah. >> If for example you're judging me. >> Mhm. >> You're not you you not say it but in my spirit I can sense. >> Mhm. >> Like sa for in this conversation I can feel you are curious. You want to know and you get. So when you're listening to to people >> listen curiosity. >> Mhm. Just listen to know where they're coming from you know. So listen without >> judgment then be a safe space. Then what someone shares to you >> like this one is public but >> whatever for example if were to share something behind the cameras. >> Yeah confidential >> confidential [clears throat] >> between us. So people should just listen and then people should genuinely I know it's hard because you are humans after all but people should genuinely genuinely love each other. Yeah, we love >> when we start having love in our hearts, >> we will heal so many people. There's a story of someone wanted to jump from a bridge in the US. >> If someone smiles to me today, not to jump. So sometimes suicide and this [clears throat] suicide in a grand guest. >> Mhm. >> To stop someone from taking their lives doesn't need guest. People want to to be seen. >> People want to be to be heard. >> Mhm. >> People want to feel I'm not a burden to others. Mhm. People want to know when someone die of suicide. It's not about grand gestures. People in in lavish areas the day of suicide. People who have money day of suicide. People don't have money day of suicide. People who are married day of suicide. People who are single day day of suicide. >> Christians day of suicide. Muslims day of suicide. People who are in the pool day of suicide. [clears throat] >> Police officers die of suicide. Civilians day of suicide. Any suicide is an equalizer. >> Yeah. Doesn't affect where you coming from. >> No. No. Although there are people who are more prone to others >> but humans no wonder we are humans. >> So sometimes we let me share a quick story to to to sum it up. >> Yeah sure. So once again, thank you Brenda for the invitation. Thank you [clears throat] James. So I had purpos. >> Yeah. >> Yeah. So I had purpose to be even earlier. >> Mhm. [clears throat] >> But unavoidable circumstance. Mhm. >> [clears throat] >> So when I was in the bus then I just did just a few minutes. So I had to do a quick in fact I didn't have as much money but so I rushing for an interview if I didn't have the extra But trust me, even if I didn't have the cash, [clears throat] >> just ask for help. >> But if I didn't have the cash, the extra cash, so >> by the time someone comes to take their life today. >> Mhm. >> It's not this thing started today. >> Mhm. >> It started in the ch in their childhood. It started in their teen years then finally they could not take it anymore. So if someone takes their life next week they didn't die they will not die next week. They died long time ago. >> Unfortunately like in Nairobi today >> or across wherever everyone is watching from but they died long time ago. >> Mhm. They took their life long time ago. Mhm. They made the decision already. >> Yeah. Then a week from now, a month from now, >> a year from now, unfortunately, >> phys gestures. >> Listen to people. Make them feel seen. Make them feel they're not a burden. >> Make people feel they're worthy. >> Respond to that text. >> Mhm. >> Anything. >> Just be supportive of people. >> Just be supportive. And that's why people humans when things are easy >> Mhm. >> they want to make it complicated. That's why people suicide and mental health because of suicide people like >> it's a mental health issue. No, suicide is not a mental health. It's different. Yeah. You mentioned something about not all people who have mental health suicide and not all people who die by suicide have mental issue. So it's a whole different topic >> but because of time we'll get to we get to that discussion later and I would like to know more about the books that you're writing and how the you're creating awareness out there but maybe just to finish up you can talk to the youth directly to the people who are listening to you right now maybe a person has been inspired by your story and all your experience talk them directly maybe a call to action where they can get you on your social media or any platforms that you are good in sharing. >> Thank you. >> [sighs] >> Now here's the thing about suicide. Suicide says in a cut across from young people to to old people. >> Mhm. >> 78 year old people they are taking their lives 80 year old people. So in a cut across number one >> Mhm. >> be selfaware. Mhm. Like I'm so selfaware. I've had two suicide attempts in my life. >> Yeah. >> So I'm I know I'm prone. So >> you see the people who are like in fact there was a time in my life was like >> looking back had forgotten at one point I had attempted when I was a kid. >> I don't know how the mind will forget certain things. Mhm. >> So number one, okay, by these circumstances, I'm prone. >> Mhm. >> No. No. For example, if you're single and live in a room, you are more prone. Yeah. If you have ever been sexually abused, [clears throat] >> you have never discussed it with anyone, with your family, with your friend, with whoever where to you are. >> Mhm. >> Nowadays, the world is changing, but there's nothing new under the sun. >> Mhm. >> There are people who behind the the scenes. >> Mhm. You're a man, but you are attracted to other men. Mhm. You are prone. >> If you drink too much, >> Mhm. you are more prone. So, all those things that can make you more prone then >> I'm like this. >> I'm high risk. Then after that, what do you do after that? You put pride aside. Pride. As men, we have ego like, "No, I'll not seek help." >> I have ego. I will find my way out. Mhm. >> Funny enough, two weeks, three weeks ago to Adams and someone. Mhm. Then I could tell I think almost >> 10 15 minutes. We as a man pride candle >> as a man pride candle. >> The other thing as a man and I know this will sound controversial. >> Mhm. >> Let's let's accept that women are not angels. >> When we were growing up were girls are flowers angels in >> but when they were growing up they were like men are >> dogs are dogs you see that on national TV that's the assumption >> you become >> so women so even when a woman finds their man cheating on them they will cry their throat and Trump says they'll do living TV but they know this is a dog. >> Mhm. >> Men women are angels. >> Mhm. >> But I want to tell people angels also fall. So find a woman cheating on you. >> Mhm. >> You you can't take it. That's why you never hear in the in the news. A woman took her a woman took her life because she found her man cheating >> but the other way a man took >> his life >> and sometimes >> so as men to accept reality >> women cheat so the moment we accept your woman has cheated on you >> I may acceptance. Then to conclude this follow me on on my new channel >> skip the rope. Yeah, a deeper meaning behind >> the call is you know most people when they take their life the most common method is even so I'm like let's use it to to 5 minutes of intensive rope skipping it changes your state of mind in fact 10 minutes of rope skipping is equivalent to 30 minutes of jogging. So I'm telling people skip the rope. So on social media follow me Tik Tok, YouTube, IG on skip the rope. Then on the other channel MD [clears throat] then my book is coming out. It's called skip the rope. You can find it depression, anxiety, bipolar, hypersexuality and grace and so many people out there you are not alone >> alone. Yeah, exactly. And thank you so much for gracing us with the knowledge and all that insights about this sensitive topic. And I've learned so much and I believe our viewers have learned as well and also they'll follow you for someone who has been touched they engage with you but because of time we could love to get to know more even about the mini bus skip the rope and also insight about the books but because of time we going to end the conversation but I was joined here by mod thank you so much my good name is James John you can find me on social media James John by for now we're going to say bye-bye meet you tomorrow early in the morning but uh don't go cuz Other programs are coming. So enjoy the rest of the programming.