Video summary
Procrastination is not a sign of laziness or personal failure, but rather a protective mechanism driven by your nervous system and brain working together to keep you safe. The amygdala, an ancient part of the brain responsible for detecting threats, often misinterprets modern challenges like starting a business or writing a proposal as life-threatening dangers similar to those faced by our ancestors. When this fear response is triggered, your body floods with tension and anxiety, effectively shutting down logical decision-making in the prefrontal cortex. Consequently, you do not avoid tasks because you lack discipline; instead, you are tricked into doing nothing because your subconscious perceives the action as unsafe, leading to behaviors like doom-scrolling or endless planning as a way to stall.
To overcome this, the first step is to regulate your body before attempting to change your thoughts, as high emotions render logic ineffective. You must physically signal safety to your nervous system by moving your body vigorously, such as shaking out your limbs or engaging in deep breathing exercises like box breathing, which helps calm the fear response. Additionally, introducing a cold stimulus, like splashing cold water on your face, can rapidly shift your state from fight-or-flight to a calmer mode. Once your body feels physically safe, you can then address the task by breaking it down into tiny, manageable steps that feel like pebbles rather than mountains, proving to your brain that there is no danger in taking small actions.
The final phase involves identifying and disarming the specific subconscious stories behind your fears, such as the fear of failure or judgment. These fears often stem from past experiences with critical voices, whether from parents, bullies, or inner critics, which equate rejection with fatal danger to your sense of belonging. By consciously naming these fears and asking questions like "whose approval am I chasing?" or "is failure actually fatal?", you can reframe your narrative and realize that imperfection is safe. Furthermore, connecting to a deeper purpose or mission provides a reason strong enough to override discomfort, while intentionally scheduling time for "safe failures" teaches your nervous system that trying new things carries no real risk, ultimately allowing you to build a life driven by excitement rather than fear.
Read the full video transcript
you need to know. You're not
procrastinating because you're lazy.
You're not procrastinating because
you're broken. You're not
procrastinating. And you're not doomed
to be one of quote unquote those people
that never follows through. Whatever
you're dealing with with your
procrastination, I promise you, I have
heard it many times over the last two
decades of coaching people, of working
with people. And I promise you this,
you're normal. You're out there and
you're going, "There's something wrong
with me. You know, I'm one of those
people who doesn't procrastinate. I
don't know how to get past it. No,
you've been beating yourself up over
procrastinating, thinking that it might
be just who you are and that it's
there's no solution to this thing. But
it's not true. There's definitely a
solution. And I'm going to teach you
today the biggest part of the solution,
the main reason why you procrastinate.
And it's not your willpower. It's not
your schedule. You don't need some new
productivity app or new planner or
something like that. Really what it
comes down to and what we're going to
dive into today is it is your nervous
system and it is your brain working
together to stop you. And I'm going to
talk to you about why that is. I'm going
to talk to you about how to actually get
past that. Because your nervous system
and your brain are doing exactly what
they're supposed to do. I want you to
know this before we go any further.
Procrastination
is just protection.
Get that burned into your brain.
Procrastination is protection. So next
time you find yourself procrastinating,
ask yourself, what am I protecting
myself from? And then you really need to
start to understand yourself from there.
There's a part of your brain that's
called the amygdala, and its only job is
to scan for threats and to keep you
alive and not let you die. And the
amygdala is one of the oldest parts of
the human brain. It belongs to what
neuroscientists call the lybic system
which is part of the quote unquote
reptilian brain is what they call it
which is the also called the primitive
brain. These are structures in the brain
that developed hundreds of millions of
years ago. Can you imagine what life was
like for our ancestors hundreds of
millions of years ago? That's when the
amydala popped up to try to help them
stay alive. But we don't deal with the
same crap that our ancestors did. You
know, we don't have to worry about a a
tiger coming out and attacking us. But
when you sit down to write that proposal
or to launch that business or to start
the workout plan or to speak your truth
and put it out on social media, your
amygdala lights up like a Christmas tree
and it says, "Warning, unknown
territory. This is a threat. Keep this
human safe. do whatever you can to trick
them to not do it. And then your body
just floods with tension. You feel fear.
Your thoughts start to spiral. Suddenly
you feel tired or you feel hungry or
maybe you're just confused about where
to start and you don't do anything. And
we're like, "Oh, it's because I'm lazy."
No, no, no. It's your brain trying to
keep you safe. This is how uh this is
the reason why I say your fears will
scream at you and your inspiration will
whisper. Your system is literally
louder. It's screaming danger, danger,
danger when it's trying to protect you
from something. And your brain doesn't
care about your dream life when it
thinks that you're actually under
attack. And so, what is it that you're
really avoiding? Then let's let's go
deeper into it because there's some
subconscious stuff that we need to pull
out and we will be right back. Hey, if
you're looking to get to your next level
and you realize that it's not another
strategy, it's not another book. It is
found by you conquering the version of
you that's holding yourself back, then
you need to be at my live event this
December 3rd, 4th, and 5th called
Freedom Live. We're going to find out
exactly where you want to be in life,
why you're not there yet, and then find
and break the unconscious patterns,
limiting beliefs, and fears that are
holding you back and capping your
success without you even knowing it. So,
if you want to live to your full
potential, but you don't know how to
break through, this is the event to be
at. You can go to freedomlive2026.com
or you can go to this QR code, scan this
right here. There's currently a $50 off
coupon right now. So, go ahead and scan
that and I will see you live in Austin,
Texas. And now back to the show. You're
not avoiding the task. You're not
avoiding writing the book, sending the
email, putting yourself on Instagram,
starting the business. You're not
avoiding that. You're avoiding the fear
in the emotion that's underneath it.
Usually, it's something like the fear of
failure, the fear of judgment, the fear
of not being good enough, the fear of
being seen, the fear of success, because
success means real change. And so, what
do you do? Your brain and body trick you
to doing nothing. And we call it
procrastination. We call it laziness.
But it's you being tricked by your
brain. So, you stall. You get your phone
out. You scroll on Instagram for 45
minutes. You tell yourself, "Oh, I don't
feel really good. I'll start I'll start
on Monday." You find something else to
do that's important around the house,
but really not as important. So, you
find something else to do versus doing
the thing you actually need to do. It's
not a laziness issue. It's not a time
management issue. It's a nervous system
regulation issue.
You just haven't made the action feel
safe yet. And until you do, your brain
will continue to slam on the brakes. No,
no, no. This is a threat. This is a
threat. Don't do this. And you don't
consciously notice it. You only
consciously notice, oh, I'm scrolling on
Instagram. But subconsciously, your
brain, your subconscious, your nervous
system, and your body are like, do not
let this human do this thing because
there is a threat out there. Here's the
truth. Like, I work with a lot of
really, really high performers. I've
worked with NFL athletes. I've worked
with some super high-powered CEOs of
multi-billion dollar businesses. I work
with them. I train them. I train them on
their minds and they the the thing I
notic about high performers and if
you're a person who is a high performer
or wants to be is that we always want to
learn the next thing. We always want to
get the next thing into our brain and
understand the next hack. But in this
situation,
you don't need it. You don't need to
download the productivity app to stop
you from procrastinating. You don't need
more motivation. You need safety.
Oo, that's sexy, isn't it? No, of course
not. It doesn't sound sexy. I know. But
this is the real shift that you need to
understand inside of your brain if you
really want to change your life. You
don't need anything else if you're
procrastinating except the feeling of
safety. Because once your body believes
and understands and knows it's safe to
act, you stop waiting for permission.
You stop overthinking. You start taking
small steps in the right direction. And
that's really what we're trying to do
here. We're trying to make oursel
understand,
oh, I'm actually safe to do this. And
once our brain and body know that,
there's no reason to stop you. And so
let me give you actual step-by-step
process that will make action feel safe
for you. Okay? So number one, you have
to understand you got to work on your
body before your brain. And so a lot of
times you're like, I need to change my
thoughts. I need to change my thoughts.
No, no. What you really need to do
before anything else is you need to
change your body. You need to change
your body. Your body needs to viscerally
feel that you are safe and you are okay.
Because when your fear response kicks
in, your logic goes out of the window.
And neuroscience shows this. When you,
this is why they say when emotions are
high, logic is low. Is because when you
actually have a high emotional or high
fear, your brain actually stops sending
as much blood flow to your prefrontal
cortex, which is your decision-making
part of your brain. And so, you don't
need logic. You don't need to think
differently. You need to calm your damn
body down before you can do anything
else. You need to get out of your head
and you need to get into your body. And
so before you try to reason with your
procrastination and with your laziness
and with your doom scrolling, you got to
move to your body first. So a couple
ways you can do this. You can stand up.
You know, maybe you notice yourself, I
need to go build my business. And then
you're 15 minutes straight on Instagram
and you're like, hold on, something's
going on here and I feel really anxious
to grow my business. I don't know if I
really want to do it. It doesn't really
feel safe. You need to stand up. You
need to shake out your arms. Shake out
your legs. Act like an idiot. If no
one's around, just move as much as you
possibly can. And uh one of the ways you
could do this as well, just shake
everything out if you want to for a
minute, two minutes. You can also do
what's called tapping where you can
actually take your your lightly hit
yourself with your fist all over your
body, every single muscle on your body,
and you could just do light tapping
throughout your entire body. After you
do that, and you get your body kind of
moving and get some of the anxiety out
of your body, do a minute of deep
breathing. And you know, the easiest
type of breathing for people to remember
is something that's called box
breathing. It's just a box. So there's
inhale, hold, exhale, hold. It's like a
box. There's four sides to it. So inhale
for 4 seconds, hold for 4 seconds,
exhale for 4 seconds, hold for 4
seconds, and then start back over again.
You do the shakes, you do the breathing
for 2 3 minutes, you'll already notice
like, oh man, I'm starting to feel a lot
more calm. Then here's what I recommend.
If you don't have a cold plunge or you
don't want to take a cold shower, the
fastest way to do this is to get a a
bucket or whatever it is that you have
around your house or in your kitchen,
fill it up with cold water, and then
fill all of the rest of it with ice,
move it around for a minute or so, and
then take your face, put your face in it
for a few seconds so that you're
actually starting to wake your your body
up, and you're completely changing your
state from what it was earlier. And what
you're doing when you do these types of
things, you're trying to tell your body,
"We're not in danger. Like, we're safe.
Let's go." And this is a really huge key
because almost nobody does this. I don't
know if I've ever heard anybody else
teach this. This is just stuff that I've
realized over almost 20 years of
coaching people is that it has nothing
to do with conscious mind. Has
everything to do with the subconscious
mind and the way that it links up with
your nervous system. But you know,
almost nobody does this, but it's the
fear in your body that's holding you
back. And so, we need to understand, we
need your body, I guess you could say,
to understand
you're safe. You're not going to die.
Okay, so that's number one. Number two,
tiny tasks. The next thing that we need
to do is we need to show it more safety
so your body feels more safe. We need to
show that it's safe. And so we need to
take teeny tiny steps in the right
direction to show that there's no
danger. No matter how small it is, we
need to figure out some sort of way to
show that there's no danger. I don't
want you to write the book. I want you
to write a really bad first sentence.
You know, I don't want you to overhaul
your entire life in your fitness
program. Just drink a glass of water.
[laughter] Like I don't want you to do
an entire workout. like I just want you
to take the first step on a walk. Just
put your shoes on to go for that walk.
If your brain thinks the task is a
mountain, you want to give it a pebble.
And then your brain goes, "Oh, it's it's
not that bad." The smaller the task, the
easier that it is to prove to your brain
that the action will not kill you. You
know, we're not trying to build Rome
today. We're trying to lay one brick
today. And so, how can you make these
mountains that we're making out in our
head to seem like a pebble to our brain?
So that's the second one. The third
thing is once you start to understand
yourself a little bit more and do this,
you want to actually like name the fear
like find the fear and disarm the story
because there's some sort of story
that's happening in your unconscious
mind. And you know I want you to
understand yourself more. I don't want
you to just listen to podcasts and read
books. Like I want you to to truly
understand yourself more over the next
couple years. There is a subconscious
story that's playing under all of this
and we need to find it because this
pattern will happen over and over and
over again until we find it and change
it. And so you need to ask yourself,
what am I really afraid of? Like what am
I afraid is going to happen if I do
this? You know, if I fail at this thing,
what does it say about me? You know,
whose voice am I hearing when I
meditate? Because our fears like to kind
of thrive in the shadows like they kind
of disappear and we don't know that
they're really there. We want to call
them out. We want to put a spotlight on
them to bring them out to the light
because it's never as scary as as we
think that it is. And when we speak
about it, it's like, oh, I'm I'm really
I'm really making a mountain out of a
pebble. And so if you have like, okay,
I'm noticing the fear of failure. Like,
what if I fail? You know, the story is
like something probably like if I try
and I fail, it proves that I'm not good
enough. And this one's pretty sneaky for
people. It sounds like perfectionism.
it shows up in like endless planning and
tweaking and waiting for the, you know,
the quote unquote right time and so you
procrastinate. Why do you procrastinate?
Because starting means risking failure.
And failure to your subconscious, it's
not just about the task. It's about your
self-worth. And so, whose voice is
behind that? It might be a critical
parent that expected perfection from
you. It might be a coach or a teacher
who made your mistakes shameful. might
be your own inner critic that you've
trained over years and years and years
of judgment. And so what do you want to
do? You want to you the antidote is to
ask yourself if failure doesn't mean I'm
broken, what else could it mean? Am I
willing to grow
and be okay with failing? You know, do I
expect to fail on this journey? And
you're trying to change your narrative
around there by asking yourself
questions to see a completely different
perspective than you've been seeing. You
know, another fear that pops up a lot is
like, what will they think in some sort
of way? Fear of judgment, opinions,
whatever it might be. And the story is
like, if I put myself out there, people
are just going to judge me and I'll get
rejected. And this fear is really hard
because we have this primal need to
belong. And so, in the moment where you
want to put yourself out there, share
your voice or share your ideas or share
your truth, this fear will slam on the
brakes. And so, you procrastinate
because taking action equals being
visible. Invisibility means vulnerable.
And when you have rejection, it equals
massive danger to your nervous system.
Oh my god, I'm not rejected. I need to
be around people. I need to be accepted
because there's that prival part of our
brain that's like, I need to be in the
tribe. And so there might be somebody
else's voice behind it. You know, there
might have been kids who bullied you for
being different when you were a kid, the
family member who mocked you when you
were younger for your dreams, or the the
toxic ex or friend who made you feel
like you were too much. And so the
antidote in this situation is to ask
yourself like rejection from who exactly
like what is rejection mean to me? Is
rejection fatal? Like who's whose
approval am I chasing? Do I even want
that person's approval? And so that's
number three. Number four is to connect
to the why. Like you need a mission. You
need a purpose. You need something
bigger than you. Something that that is
bigger than the discomfort of starting.
And you need to ask yourself like what
is this? Who benefits from me
succeeding? Why was I born to do this?
How will this change my family's lives?
My very first mentor used to always tell
me, my first coach that I hired when I
was 19 said, "When your your why is
strong enough, your how will reveal
itself." And so when you think about
quitting, remember why you started.
That's number four. And the number five
is to actually schedule failure time.
This one's huge. It's a gamecher. Make
failing a part of your plan. Write 30
minutes of bad copy. Take 15 minutes to
record a messy podcast episode. Take one
hour to test stuff that you're scared
of. No pressure, no outcome. This it
doesn't matter if you completely screw
it up. This is just practicing showing
up for yourself. You know, I in in my
course mindset 2.0 where I teach this
type of stuff, the neurology of taking
action and the psychology behind it. I
call this it up and figure it out,
right? Because every time you show up,
regardless of the results, you're
teaching your nervous system that it's
safe to try. And that's important. And
so, you really need to understand this.
You're not lazy. You're just wired for
survival. That's the real cure to
procrastination is finding the safety.
It's not some life hack. It's not
another app. But deeply knowing how your
brain and your body work together. And
when you teach your nervous system that
it's safe to start, it's safe to be
seen. It's safe to fail. Well, it's safe
to suck a little bit and to not be good
for a while and you will get better over
time. And that your brain goes, it's
safe for me to try these things. Because
you're not here to live under some sort
of fear. You're here because you're
supposed to build some sort of life that
excites you, that helps you, and helps
other people, even if it does scare you.
And so, I really want you to understand
that this is the thing that you need to
do if you're trying to stop
procrastinating. Hey, thanks so much for
watching today's video. If you love this
video, click this one right here. This
is the one that you need to watch next.
And if you want to make sure you don't
miss any more of these episodes, click
that button right there. Make sure you
subscribe and check out the next