Why Are The Overlooked Men So Mad At Women?

Ladies and gentlemen, Tony guys can see here they're popping in. Now, I wanted to talk about this because I saw on the video I did about the uh Sura and Joey Bad. A lady commented. She said, "Tony, let's be let's be fair. Not all nerds are good guys. A lot of these doctors are players too. And that is very true. And I wanted to talk about that and explain a little something that we could do to help. But it it is not really going to work because we're not going to be able to spread it worldwide. You know, it's not like I'm on national news or got a billboard in every city. But the thing about it is you'll be able to pick that up very fast. You could pick it up on the first date if a man and I don't like the word nerd or lame or anything like that. It's just the street terms and so I don't really mean that when I be saying that like that and and you know really unfortunate and to the men who may feel like that's to you know I apologize. it just a street term. I don't mean it in a derogatory way or nothing like that. I have male clients who are doctors and lawyers and surgeons and things of that nature and some of them are single and you know some of them have recently got in a relationship or what have you. But the reason why a lot of these men are mad and you see some of them on YouTube with YouTube channels and they will do they will find the content that make women look the worst and they'll post about that content and do reactions to that content to paint the narrative that women are trash. And they're doing that because they were overlooked. And it's it's key little signs. So what I told y'all about when a man beard don't connect or if a man goes bald early and the shape of his head is different, too light, too dark, too tall, too short, too anything. Kids are cruel. And one thing you know about being a former kid is that kids are cruel. Kids don't care nothing about you. Kids will drag you from top to bottom, left to right, and will drag you all day long. Every time they see you in the hallway, in class, after school, before school, on the internet, on the video game, at practice, kids will drag you to filth. They don't have a barometer, a thermometer, a gauge. They don't understand feelings and emotions. Even though they have them, they don't understand them. So, bullies don't understand how detrimental bullying is to somebody else. And that's what y'all have to realize about 90% of men was has gone through that rigomearo. just went through all of that stuff. At some point, they were overlooked, they were mistreated, they were talked about, touched, abused, like 90% of men. And so when you see these men with an attitude, they angry, they got these stipulations for women, woman got to say this, say that, do this, do that. If she say this, I ain't dating her. If she say that, I'm cutting off. And they got all of these rules. I I I remember coaching a client and she sent me she showed me the conversation of her and this guy that she met on Facebook dating and the guy like was her her she from the islands or somewhere or another country and so her tone her text tone is very direct and it comes off as cold and harsh sometimes. And so the guy got offended and I told her she was wrong from for that the way she was so sharp and like almost trying to train him or teach him or reprimand him. And I'm like, you know, you're not his mom. You don't have to reprimand him. You just take notice of what he said, how he said it. Take a mental note and move accordingly. And so she sent me like the stuff he said and and he got back with her. Now he got back with her went to kind of snapping and kind of putting in her place and then being very rude, being very condescending and like I'mma share this video with you since you seem to know nothing about men and relationships according to what you said. And so, and then the video is like a video that a lame would watch. And it's it's it's men on YouTube that have like lame training schools. It's it's kind of like and and I'll be honest with you if I would have went into that field why I would have made so much money cuz listen I don't when I say that I'm not bragging to you know and and I ain't it ain't and I'm not saying I used to look good or nothing like that but I'm but I'm just telling you I would all him. I ain't have no problem with the women. Like I had homeboys that became pro aletes. They came to me for women. And all my homeboys came to me for women. Hey T, what up? What? Hey, you got somebody I can hit, man? Hey, put me on this chick. Put me on that chick. Put me on that chick. And I was the one who made the connection because I had a over an abundance of women. And and I and that's how the dazzling dime started. My homeboy came to me and he said, "Bro, you got away with women that's not common." I was like, "What you mean, bro?" And he was like, "And you need to do something with that." And I'm like, "What you mean?" And he was like, "Bro, you just could do stuff with women and the way the amount of women you got and can get, it's just not common, bro. You need to do something with that." And I started Dazzling Dimes. And I just had a conversation with with a bunch of girls at the college and and they joined they joined the click and they was the dazzling dimes and I put them in uniforms, boy shorts with tank tops with the glitter. Found a guy on MySpace in Atlanta who made glitter shirts and took them to the club and they twerked and got money thrown at them. And then some of them wanted to do more than that with guys, but I didn't let them do it cuz they didn't understand the danger that they was asking me to put them in front of like going to a hotel or apartment with a group of a bunch of guys and they thinking they just going to go in there and twerk. And I'm like, "No, that's not what's going to be the end of that. You go in there and get hurt." And they were like, "Tony, we want to make money. We want to make money." And I could have became a active pimp. And I could have been Andrew Tate, but I just I guess God didn't let me go that far. And and I and I knew better. And I and I knew in my heart that wasn't what I was supposed to be doing. And my mama, she known for speaking her mind. And she said to me one day, she was like, "You need to do something different." Like I'm I'm my friends be asking me, "How little Tony doing?" Cuz my daddy named Tony Senior. how little Tony doing? And I don't know what to tell him. Like, what I'm supposed to tell him? He got a he got a bunch of girls that he take around to the club to dance and he like working girls in the club. Like, I'm ashamed. I don't know what to say. Look at me today. She sh boy. She sh But that thing hit me though. And so, that's what you got to realize. Like my experience that I had with women is a is a top 1%. Like I don't know a single other man that come from what I come from and and was doing and did what I did and not not off the muscle with no money, with no fame, with no notoriety. Yeah, guys get a bunch of women when they become millionaires and when they become pro aletes, but just off the muscle in high school and college, it it wasn't happening. And and guys used to literally bow down to me. Like they literally be riding down the street, they'll roll down the window and salute me. Hey boy. Hey. Yeah, boy. You doing that thing, boy? Hey, I salute you. And they that's how they was. And I and I and and I started dazzing D after Sheree broke up with me after a few months and she was out to the club cuz she was friends with the club promoters. So she'll just be out there standing around and stuff like that and she seen me pull up with a thousand times and she although she a good woman, she a classy woman, I think it still kind of hit her like dang like that boy ain't missing me at all. Like that boy can have any woman he want. like I done broke up with him like I'm all of that and he pull up with eight of them. My goodness. And I remember looking at her one time and she was trying not to look at but she was looking sick cuz she was looking like dang he like that with it. What you thought? And so when we got back together, she was all over me. Boy, she was all over me now. Fell right in love. Right back in love now. And so you got to realize these men, I just seen a guy do a video and he is one of them overlooked guys, but now he got a supercar and he was talking about basically he was trying to y the awakening other men saying, "You got muscles and all of that, but what you think a woman want more of? a man with muscles or a man with a supercar. And and and he didn't even realize what he was saying. He was saying, "If you get a supercar, you're going to get more attention from women than if you have muscles." And he was like, "Yes, the best thing is to have the body and the supercar, but if you can't get the body or you don't have the body, it's better to have the supercar than the body." And he was just talking about how him and his friend was outside, friend got a supercar, he got a supercar, and all of the girls, even though he was out with his wife, all of the girls was looking at their supercars. And to me, it was just lame because I'm just like, would that you happy about that? Like you excited about that? Like that that turned you on? Like you you just all the girls looking at me? Like to me that lame. And so but that's how a lot of men are like they get they whole focus is getting attention from women looking like the man to w to women looking like they got all the money or looking like they got all the success. And that's why y'all are going through hell on earth. And when I say hell I don't mean I I'm not using it like cuss word. I'm talking about like the real thing. That's why y'all going through a little bit of hell on earth because of these men being buttth hurt and having been overlooked and having been mistreated by women. And you can tell that though in the first date, it don't matter what he talking about. It don't matter how much money he make. Don't matter none of that. you you will be able to tell if he is defensive, if he's snappy, if he's condescending, he make little snarky remarks. He wear his job on his forehead or his money or what he does is on his forehead. That's when you'll know he is a revenge of the nerds, revenge of the lames, and you got to cut them off. A man who is confident and this the thing. So, so it's not that just be with a nerd. No, it be with somebody who was raised right, who got internal confidence and his confidence is from within and not outwardly or from without. It's from within and he's able to know who he is. So, he's not competing with you in the conversation. He ain't trying to stunt on you. He's not trying to impress you. He just having a normal conversation. He ain't throwing out numbers. He ain't throwing out success. He ain't throwing out none of that. He really is getting to know you. Like the conversation really is all about you. He want to know your mind. He want to know your heart. He want to know your life. And you got to make sure that you don't fall for the foolishness and and be up there bragging about your job and your career and your money and your degrees and you and Cheyenne Bryan is classmates from Argusy and you a doctorate and not wearing all that on your forehead cuz then he's going to know you're insecure and you don't know who you are and you think that your paperwork work makes you somebody and makes you special. But your character and your heart and your personality and your mind and your conversation skills h don't make you anything. Like you don't even care about that. You're not even thinking about that. You focus more on your job title and your degrees and stuff like that. And that's where, and again, women who are like that were overlooked by the boys coming up. And so they're insecure and they wear that stuff on their forehead. And now the same thing with the women, you have revenge of the lames, revenge of the nerds. So, like the lady who got the dating app thing and the single show, she got a lot of air in her chest and she always be putting men down and talking about, "Oh, I'm so busy. I'm so successful. I ain't got time for this. I ain't got time for that." But as a black man, I can look at her and tell that she she wasn't coveted like she wasn't chased down by men. cuz cuz if she was for one she would already be married and and it ain't that oh she could have been married a million times. It's like a lot of women say that but you're not married for a reason because the men you met was bombs. They just it just wasn't up the par. And and just because you're not married it don't necessarily mean something is wrong with you. But you got to look into and understand what is the disconnect. Is it because I'm in protective custody? Is it because there's a shortage of men? Or is it because there's something that I'm doing wrong? And it's one of those three. It's one of those three. And like the lady with the with the dating app, it's because of what she doing wrong. It ain't because when when you successful and you and you notable, it's it's plenty of men out there for you. But when you wear your success on your forehead and you think that's what gives you your value, it's going to turn off every single real man. And the only man you will attract is a user. He will be basically just a prop. He's just a position, a seat filler. and he's there to use you. And he's also there to usurp and to embarrass you. And he's going to be the type of man to where he's going to beat the prenup. He's going to let you get a prenup, but the prenup still has to be fair and has to have stipulations in it for him. So, it's going to say that like if you earn more money than him, after five years he gets this amount, after 10 years he gets this amount. And that's why you have some men getting spousal support, child support, alimony, whatever it's called, severance pay from the woman who earns more. And that's all you're going to attract. You're not going to attract a real man. If you can't be humble and graceful as a man or a woman in your success, in your accolades, you're going to attract the wrong type of person. and the guy who was talking about his supercar and how this guy had the body and he took his shirt off, but none of the none of the girls was looking at the guy who had the body. But then when him and his friend went outside and they crunk up their supercars, all the girls was looking at them. It was and and he thought that meant something. All it mean is that if you was single, you just gonna get used by one of them girls that's looking at supercar because a real woman don't care about your supercar. Like she honestly don't even know what it is. She she she looking at it like if it ain't a Mercedes Benz or a Lexus to her it could just be a body shop fixed up one of them little drifting Tokyo drift fast and furious cars. She not every woman know what a Lamborghini and a Porsche and a McLaren and Ferrari and all of that is not every woman is in the car. So she just she see your car, she don't know if that car cost $10,000 and you fixed it up and painted it or if it cost $2 $300,000. The women who know what a supercar is, 90% of them know for the wrong reasons because they're a gold digger. It's only 10% of them know because they into cars. Their daddy was in cars or they just was in the cars. But 90% of them know because they gold diggers and they coming to you for that supercar. So you ain't won nothing. You have not won nothing. You've won Mr. Dummy award because now you f to get used. She f to poke a hole in that condom. She f to get pregnant. You f to be taken care of for the rest of your life. So that ain't no compliment either. But what I want you to realize with these men is they upset. They upset. Their butt hurt. And it's unfortunate. It's an unfortunate thing, but it's a real thing. The men who were overlooked coming up, but they're not butt hurt, it's because nine out of 10en times because they had a good mom who spoke life into them. And their mom always told them, "You are so handsome. You are so smart. You are so handsome, boy. You so smart. Boy, you so confident. Boy, you are a genius. Boy, what can't you do? Boy, you could do anything. What you What you thinking about being when you grow up? You could do it. You could do that. Anything else you want to do, you could do that, too. You could do anything you put your mind to, son. that those are the men who don't be buttth hurt. And and I ain't talking about a mom, you know, who serve the son hand and foot and he could yell at her, curse at her, all of that. That's the worst kind of mom. That's the worst kind of mom. That's why y'all have a the problems that you have cuz a lot of moms are scared of their son. Like I saw the mom who she now not to say that she did it the right way or her son ain't gonna be no handful, but I love the fact that she stepped down on her son. It's a video her son was bullying a kid and and the bully weren't innocent because he took his shoe off and just dropped it on the floor. Instead of hand putting it in the boy hand, he gonna drop it on the floor. I guess it's just socially awkward. Didn't know what to do. But mama was like, "Swa." She She was one of those balls. She was like, "Take off them shoes right now. Take off them shoes right now. You get him shoe. You give him shoes right now. You go pick on his shoes. We don't do that. We don't do that. Boy, we done had a lot of hard time. Boy, we done came from nothing. Boy, get him shoe right now." And he ain't trying to he ain't trying to jump bad with mama cuz she still bigger than him now. But the fear of God he putting she putting in him right now will make him respect her so that even when he is big enough to whoop her he will know my mama will kill me. If I try her I'mma have to kill her because she will stab me. She will shoot me. My mama don't play cuz she ain't never played my whole life. And that's what a man respect. That's what a boy respect. And he not going to play with mama if she have to get all the way with him. And some boys you don't have to get like that. They personality just ain't like that. You ain't got to yell at them. You ain't got you ain't got to do none of that. You ain't got to spank them or nothing. You just could talk to them. And it's just because you've been consistent. You've been active. But a lot of these men is a handful because of how they was raised by their mama and daddy. And if their daddy weren't there, then you know it is the mama just calling them and just doing everything for them instead of teaching them stuff and all of that. And so that's one of those things And so that's what you got to realize. Y'all got to forgive me on reading comments. And so that's what you got to realize. And you got to be able to pick that up. And if it and if he slip past you on the first date, he going to show it on the second date. If he don't show it on the second date, it's going to be on the third date. But it's going to be within them first three dates, you going to see that he's insecure. So therefore, he's arrogant instead of being confident. Confidence is rooted in humility. Arrogance is rooted in insecurity. And so that's what you have to pay attention. And and the way you'll know is you have to ask yourself, how does it make me feel? If he makes you feel less than or timid or like you have to shrink, then that's a red flag. You got to pay attention to that. If he don't let you be fully you and let you talk, I saw a lady today and she was talking about like, oh, if a woman is loud and all of that, that mean you're a weak man. And again, that's a woman giving giving advice when actually it it mean you're a strong man because you don't and that's what I had to learn. I used to try to tell my wife how to be and how to show her personality, but then I at the soccer games and stuff and then I had to realize I said, you know what, if she yelling and screaming and people don't like it, she making herself look bad. Like people will be looking at me and be like, oh man, I feel sorry for him. Ain't nobody gonna look at me and you not f to look at me and look at the way I look at you and look at the way I walk and look at the way I talk and the way I carry myself and think I'm no punk and think she just running all over me. What you going to realize is that I'm a real man. And so she just got full free reign to be herself. And if she end up getting herself in trouble and embarrassing herself, which she has done, and it start to hurt the kid, then she start to learn like, okay, I got to chill out. But then what I had to learn is like, okay, I hear her voice because I know her voice, but I started listening for the other parents around us and they was yelling at their child just as much. For me, it was different because I don't say a word at the game. I look at it like these are children. They have to learn from their mistakes. They have a coach. I don't need to say anything unless my son is exhibiting a a attitude and a bad behavior and showing poor character. He's not gonna hear nothing from me other than motivation if he get close enough. Hey, good job. Keep going. Hey, stay locked in. Keep going. That's all I'mma say. But I'm not going to yell out correction and stuff like that. But it's also because I was a highle athlete. I didn't make it high level, but I was always the best athlete growing up. I was the best football player, the best basketball player in my age group, in my city, in my county. And so I look at it totally different because it was guys who weren't as good as me who went on to be pros. It's just I started selling drugs and sleeping around with a bunch of women and that derailed me. And so I I take that into consideration as well. And I notice, you know, the type of dads and and stuff like that who be doing a bunch of holling and yelling, a lot of them be living through their kid. And so you got to realize that all these things play into how these men are today. And my sons, they not going to be perfect. No man's going to be perfect. But one thing I know is they're going to hear my voice and they're going to listen to me. And if they talking to their woman a certain way, treating their woman a certain way, I'mma step down on them and I'mma let them know like, "Hey, I know you seen some stuff from me. I know you saw my attitude at times. I know you saw me, you know, get out of character at times when you was growing up. And whether that was, you know, me having to yell at you or get in your face or whatever, but I always treated your your mom like a woman. I always looked out for, took care of her, and I did my absolute best with her. Now, I ain't never going to get ran over now. I ain't going to never get disrespected. I ain't I ain't gonna never put up with none of that now. So you ain't see that either, but don't be trying to to punk your woman. And I talk to them. And sometimes a a man listen to different people at different times. Some some men only going to respond to their mama. Some men going to respond to their to their dad. For me, I respond to my dad. Like I listen to my dad so I could hear him. So when he says something to me, I could hear him. And but I didn't start listening until 23 years old after my wife left me for going back to the streets selling drugs. And then I went to my dad and I said, "Hey, you know, teach me how to be a man. Like, what do I need to do? How I need to do this thing?" And that's when I listened to every word he said. Hey, make sure we I got to get ready to go here in 13 minutes for a call. But make sure you get on your free trial at the Purpose Pushers. We got a call tonight, 700 p.m. So hop on in there. It's going to be a great little call and Oh, you going to miss it. You going to miss it. But I was supposed to be going out of town and for some reason, I don't know what what I did wrong. I booked my flight for the wrong day and the day has already passed. I supposed to be flying out. So, here I am. Think I'm flying out the mark on Thursday. I done booked my flight for Sunday. And I don't know. I don't think I could call and get it changed or use the credit cuz I missed it. And so, and I don't even want to be on there like that. And they laughing at me like, who do these black people think they are? Like, are you that dumb? Were you raised? Are you were you still in slavery? How did you How did you not know you can't call after you miss a flight and use the credit? Oh my god. I just got off the phone with a black guy. So I I'm just talking a flight was $600, too. Boy, I say, man, I'm about to have to do me a GoFundMe. So you got to realize and understand and you got to realize that and God bless Yeah. Y'all forgive him. Y'all forgive me. And so think about it and pay attention to it. And I'm going tell you the thing about it is this is this is the thing that this is the thing I I I I would and I'mma urge you on this right here. time. Don't settle for a man just because he has a good job and he makes good money. The sad part about women is that y'all are too easily bought. Make up in your mind that you will go make your own money and be committed to that. I know you don't want to work. Nobody don't want to work. We men don't want to work either. And when you don't want to work, the man don't want to work. But because he got to work, if he providing, women go through a lot. Stay-at-home moms go through a lot. It's a lot of growing that we have to do as men before we stop mine versus yours, this, mine, do what I say do, and treating a woman like a slave. And that's the part that a lot of stay at home stay-at-home moms don't talk about or admit to that that growth period that that man got to go through. And then there some women who they may they may have never had to go through that. But you know what also they be going through that they don't know about or sometimes they know about? They man be cheating. They man be sleeping with prostitutes. I seen two different two different white men get caught up this week for nefarious behavior. One one the owner of the 49er that I did a video on who went to hire a prostitute and he got a wedding ring on. I don't know if he married or if that was the wrong hand I was looking at but look like he had a wedding ring on tal to try to hire a prostitute and probably got a stay-at-home wife. She got the absolute life and look what a man out there doing. He probably don't give her no problem. Got no budget. Do whatever she want to do and look what a man doing. So when a man giving you his all and it's all about you, you're going to have to hear his mouth and you're going to have to learn how to talk to him and communicate with him to let him know like, "Hey, that's unacceptable." And that's what that's what my wife had to teach me because she she haven't worked since she was 20 years old. She turned 40 next month. September 26, she turned 40. Guess what y'all? Y'all be sending her cash out. Cash out and change her rule. change the rule to where after a few people send you a dollar or whatever they send you, they shut it down. You can't even receive it. Like my goodness, what the real. And so yeah, but hey, God bless you. Keep your head up. Got a call in 8 minutes. Pay attention to this. Learn the signs. Pay attention. Oh, and what I was say, what I was saying, don't get bought. Be willing to walk away. Yes, it's going to be hard to meet a man who has it all. You know, who who good personality and all of that, but don't settle. You will be happier alone than you will being in a relationship with a man that's treating you like property and talking to you like a dog. Like I've been married over 19 years and I'm still trying to grow as a man. Like I'm still trying to be better. And it's it's questions I want to ask that I feel like Tony that's an insecure question. Tony, that's a nonconsequential question. Inconsequential question. Like that. Tony, that's a dumb question. Like that's a that's a dumb topic. Like why why do you even want to ask that? Like what does that have to do with anything? Like Tony, that's coming from insecurity. Like why why do you even want to say that? Because even if it is true, what is she going to say? Yeah, you're right. I I am I do want you to leave for a few days. Like, no, she not going to say that. So, why would you even ask, are you happy about me leaving? And so, but all of those things run through your mind as a human, male and female. And and we have to learn how to be mature, how to be confident, and all of those things. And so that's a constant battle with the mind, especially when you got to live on social media and you seeing so much so many narratives on social media. Like right now I see a bunch of women talking about how women don't like having sex because it's not pleasing to them. So then as a man when you see that you want to bring up that conversation and be like, "Hey, do you not like having sex with him?" But then you got to realize what is she supposed to say? So, you got to come to have some resolve within yourself to just be like, "Hey, I'm I'mma understand, you know, and I'mma I'mma do my thing now and just get what you get. Don't picture fit." Like, ain't there some things I want that I can't get, but that's how the mop flop and the cookie crumble. Like, everybody gonna always be pleased in everything. like want me a little action that ain't that ain't getting like that just that come with it. Like nobody is responsible for your happiness. Nobody is responsible for your pleasure. And social media will have us thinking that our spouse is responsible for our happiness and our pleasure and everything supposed to always be hunky dory and perfect. And that caused a lot of riffs in relationships. So even I I' I've been and I've been on I've been on this journey for since 2007 and just always talking to myself, teaching myself every day, just talking to myself. And so like even right now, I'm like, hey, I want my wife her birthday next month. I want her to make I want to make sure she have a season of peace that she ain't got to have no tough conversations. She not confrontational. She don't like tough conversations. She ain't got to answer to nothing. She got to answer to me. It ain't got ain't got to be nothing nothing serious. Ain't got to be nothing deep. Ain't having no budgeting talks or no this and that talks. And man, just live. Just just live, laugh, love, have fun, handle handle what you got to handle as a man. Do what you got to do. Make things happen. And don't don't cry and complain. Get up, go to work, come home, laugh, smile, talk, feel her spirit, pay attention to to how she moving, how she how she feeling. And if you could tell that this ain't a time to try to make out or make no move, then don't do it. And if she completely happy and she in a good mood and and every this and that ain't involved in it, then okay, that's cool. Like that's a good thing. It's like if if you can and my wife told me that a long time ago. She was like to me hanging out watching TV feel like sex. She was like being in your presence feel like sex. She was like, "Laughing and talking with you." She was like, "It's it's it's all a great feeling." She like, "I don't even separate the feelings." She was like, "And that's and I learned that from her that making love is communication." When sex is the an expression of fulfilling lust, but the real making love is making love to the mind. when you can have great conversation and then at the right time and that's what a lot of people don't understand. People be online bumping their guns, but it's like when you waking up four o'clock in the morning and you ripping and running all day and you tired and I be on the phone with people hours a day, it's like I don't be feeling like having no sex. And then my wife and her life and her schedules, she don't be feeling like having no sex. So sometime we just lay beside each other in the bed and just have something on TV. will Uber Eats, put the food in between us and eat right there and that be the best days in the world and just got to realize and understand that. And so a lot of people don't get that though. But hey, this Tony Gaston, God bless you. Make sure join us, get your free trial in the Purpose Pushers community. Once you come in there, you ain't going to want to leave. Great community building it day by day and don't know what the cap on it going to be. We'll just see what the Lord do. But just be a great place to meet like-minded people, hear other people questions and stories and and just be able to build from there. But God bless you. Keep your head up. We'll talk soon.