Why Are Men Committing So Slow Today?

Hey, hey, Tony Gaston's here popping in now. Just as soon as I do that, my wife text me. My goodness. And I know y'all just gonna be thinking Tony just be faking like he got text. That's about tennis. So, not nothing too serious. And let me get my notes and type on me a few notepad over here and just in case I need to cuz now if you're new here I do these videos off the top of the dome. We just flowing with it and of course text be coming in and sometimes I got a story for you. But want to talk to you about this and just addressing the things that I'm seeing in social media in our world today. And one of those things just men committing a lot slower. Some of you may not know, but I am a professional matchmaker and have been so for about 15 16 years now. And it's I actually charge less today than I charged when I got started. And even though it's way harder today, but I just tell my clients, hey, be patient with me. It could take up to a year. I'm going through person by person because a lot of women are not being approached. And then when a woman is approached, she gets in relationship. A lot of women are not being married. And even great guys who are faithful and everything are taking five plus years to marry a woman. And then a lot of women are having to leave a man at the altar. A lot of women getting engaged and then having to walk away from an engagement. And some men are doing that as well. Some men getting engaged to a woman and then leaving her. And of course, overall, the blanket of it all you could say is spiritual warfare, but it's a lot of caveats and nuances in there that's happening. And it's a few different things that's that that we have going on. And I want to hit on a each one and what it's doing. And I'mma just jot these down for myself. so we can touch on it. And so the the first thing that I want to touch on and I want to give you or the women watching this want to give you some tips on this as well because you can't just get sad and go crawl in a hole. You got to combat it. You got to fight back against what the enemy wants, what spiritual warfare is doing. You got to fight back. Got to stay in the fight. Fight the good fight of faith. And one of the things that is really, really affecting us today is social media and that's Instagram. Instagram is the number one culprit for relationship demise. And the reason why is because it's a picture website. The pictures are very aesthetic. You can post edited filtered pictures. You can post several pictures on one post. And it's 1,000% acceptable to post in a bathing suit, in a thong bathing suit. I just was on threads and saw Serena Williams, the great Serena Williams, who is married, posted her, you know, backside from the backside stretching, reaching to hit a tennis ball and that forward leg stretches out, hits the the pavement. booty goes into a Roton Tundra rotisserie and she has on kind of like some sheer kind of see-through leggings with some, you know, like some heart-shaped underwear on, you know, whatever spandex or panties or sports panties or whatever. And so you just kind of see the outer side of the cheek. You see the roton. You see the vibration. And she's a married woman and she's a star athlete. So we as men are all excused to watch that because we're she's not a porn star. She's a the greatest tennis player to ever play the game. So we're going to click on it and look at the video. And I looked at the video two times, maybe three times, just trying to get a feel for it, just trying to see what what is she and she put on there caption this. So I'm like, well, what do she want us to caption, you know? I I can't really see the the the strike of the ball too much, but I can see two voluupuous Buddha. So now I'm sitting at work and I'm talking about it here on the camera, man. I'm telling you something I ain't have to tell you. So don't try to use my transparency against me cuz I could have come on here acting like y'all the awakening like I've never seen a butt on Instagram or on social media that was on threads. But that type of stuff it leads you into lust. And if you're not aware of it, if you're not cognizant of it, if you don't refute it, if you don't push back on it, you'll lead into lust. And next thing you know, you heading into the bathroom to watch it 10 more times and wax yourself on off and relieve yourself. And that's how we are as men. And you got to grow beyond that. But the question is, what reason does a man have to grow? So the reason why I grow beyond that is because I stepped into my purpose. I wrote a book. I started teaching. God put his hand on me. He blessed me. So I have to answer to a higher power. And I feel a conviction in my spirit. That's why I even shared that with you because I felt the conviction even seeing that, watching that. And but that's the reality of life. Now guess what? What do you think a single man is going to do? He going to watch it 10 times, 15 times. Then he's going to like it. He's going to leave a comment. He may even shoot Serena a DM even though she's married. But she married to a white man. So to a black man, that don't count. So, he gonna shoot her a DM. And then guess what? It's going to be a million other women that's on the timeline in a bathing suit that are going to receive a DM from him. And he's going to shoot his shot, shoot his shot, shoot his shot until he can no longer shoot his shot. Look at Jayon Love Deian Love. He shot his shot at all of these women on the dating apps, on social media, and all of them responded. So a man ain't going to strike out all the time. So what what's happening is these men getting on these sites, they shooting, they shot and they're not striking out and and they might send t 10 DMs at a time and three, four, five of those women respond. It's like you you you batting at a pretty high rate, so you going to keep that going. And that social media is really hurting us. But here's the thing. This is what I say to women. Don't get out the fight. Don't just say, "Oh, because men have so much temptation on Instagram. I'm not even going to worry about it. I'm not even going to try." To be honest with you, and don't think that this is desperate, but you got to throw your ring in. You got to throw your hat in the ring. You're going to have to get on Instagram. get where you need to get. Post you pictures every week. Post your quotes. Post your devotionals. Post a gourmet picture of your lunch. And get out your way. Get out your way. Post and see how you feel. See what it does for you and post how the algorithm is working. So, if the algorithm is working and it's one of those things to where you end up, if it's working on reals, post your reals. If Tik Tok booming, get on Tik Tok. If it's LinkedIn that boom for you, get on LinkedIn. If it's Facebook timeline, get on the Facebook timeline. Do whatever you have to do to get out there to get in the game. I've never in my life met so many women who don't use social media but yet want a husband. Social media is one of the biggest and fastest ways to meet a husband. Y'all got to forgive me. My wife is frightening me. Let me pause this one second. Just see what she talking about. I just Y'all forgive her, man. I don't be trying to act or nothing like that. I just hate to leave her hanging cuz just stay at home mom and I just be want to see what she talking about cuz if she she see I'm at work and she texting me that mean I'm her friend and she want me to check it out and so one thing Alan Irish was her inspo she sending me the girl Naomi Osaka then the next thing this how you be after one workout so I'm about to see how I be after one workout I'll be right back so I'mma tell you you know you got to get out there and this what you want to do when you get out there. You want to make sure that you put your best foot forward. And when it comes to social media and your Instagram etiquette, you can like a man's post. You can watch a man's story. You can hit the like on his story. You don't have to comment on his page because that lets other women know you in his comments. You you don't even have to like his post. You could just like his story. You don't have to follow them, but you could follow them because sometimes stories just do that right there and just go to the next person. So that's totally fine. No issues on that. And You're off again. And so that's how you get noticed. And then from there, the man will take it from there. Now, with the like method, that's as close as you going to come to shooting your shot. And the reason why I say that, cuz some of y'all starting to think about shooting your shot. Some of you done shot your shot and it been blocked or you done been knocked down and then left. Some of you shot your shot and that became your husband. It It just how it works out sometimes. Like my coach says, how the mop flops and how the cookie crumbles. How the cookie crumbles and how to mop flops. And so, but you can't bet on that because that is an exception to the rule. That's not always going to be the rule. And so, in this day and time, that's as close as you can come. Now, if that's too much for you, I don't blame you. You're not wrong. But what you will what you do want to do is you'll want to go to his page and spend a few seconds spend about 30 seconds on about 10 of his pictures. When you do that, it's going to put you on his discover page. So the stuff you looking at, it'll cross reference y'all's post and that's how the algorithm works to kind of make people connect. So whenever you see somebody randomly, especially like they're not famous or something like that, and you see somebody randomly on your discover page, on your for you page, that means they've been on your page. they've been spending time on your page and looking at your stuff and that's why you seeing them. And so understand that. And then what you want to do is you want to post every day if you can because it and it don't have to be a picture and you want to post a picture every week. And don't feel like you got to talk on camera. Don't feel like you got to preach. Don't feel like you got to share advice. Don't feel like you got to do any of that, but you want to you want to show up on camera, post a picture. Even if you got to go out by yourself on Friday night, go out or Saturday night, put your nice outfit on, take get you a tripod. I got one right here. And um you might could take a picture of this and use the Google image and because it ain't got a name on it, so I can't tell you which one it is, but my wife got it probably off Amazon and it has a Bluetooth thing that pop out that you can connect to your camera and you can start and stop your camera with that little Bluetooth remote. and take that tripod. It goes up probably 5 ft. And you could hook your camera on there, set the timer on your phone. Some of y'all don't know how to do the timer, but in the camera when you getting ready to take a photo, you can hit the hit the little dots. And so you you able to hit the little up in the corner, you'll see a few little dots, six little dots. It's three and three in the top right. And you hit that right there. You hit that. Hit them three dots. And then the options come up. So for those y'all don't know how to use, then you hit timer. And then hit it three times because it'll give you 10. So now your timer on 10. So then when you hit take a photo, it'll countd down from 10. So you got time to hit take the photo, walk, turn around, pull, hit your angle, and do you do you that about three, four times, and now you self photographering. If you don't want to go to a restaurant, you ain't got the money, then get up at a certain time of day on Saturday and Sunday, go down to the park, do your little photo shoot, wear your different outfit. You only going through four outfits a week. I mean, a month and you take your new photo in a different location, you know, day on the town or solo date. Men love that. men, love, confidence, independence. You ain't always got to have no group of women with you. Solo date, boom, you out there. Go on about your business. And then you post every week. And then from there, you now when the man come to your page, he get to see how you dress. He get to see how you present yourself. Now, I'm going to be honest with you. Majority of y'all can't dress. And majority of you think you know it all. So you don't like to listen. You do not want to hear that your fashion is bad because you think that I just want you to dress like my wife. That is not the case. It's just I rarely coach a woman who could dress and I just Like right now I'm thinking of probably five out of thousands who could actually dress. So I honestly you can use chat GPT. You can ask it. Give me some fall looks. Give me four fall looks. I got a couple stylists that are clients. Reach out. One of them be in the comments, but she never she don't self-promote. I respect that about him. But if you see this here video, Saki, then put your email in the put your email in the comments. Some of y'all know Sakia and you ain't booked her yet cuz you heard you seen her teach on 3B's virtual call. Book a session, get you some looks. Even after paying Saki, take and compare those looks, get you some looks off of chat GPT. Upload you some pictures of yourself. Do your timer. Put on some of your outfits. Stand in front of the wall in your house. upload those three, four pictures to chat GPT and say, "Give me some alternative looks with links to the stores where I can buy the looks that you suggest to elevate my fashion and look more modern and on trend or whatever term you want to use." And you need that. You need that. I'm telling you. Because men don't know fashion like that. But they know what look good. That's it. They know what look good. And so if you up the par, you dressed up to par, he's going to be able to tell, okay, yeah, there's something about this. And that's why I love Aritzia because they going to keep the latest fashion out of the out of the magazines, but it ain't runway fashion. It's everyday street fashion. Some of it is office fashion, corporate fashion. And same with Zara, which could be a little step down and clothes may be a little cheaper, not cheaper, but a little cheaper material. And but they going to have some of the latest hits. That's Zar. Yeah. No, not Aritzia. Yeah. Zara. Yeah. Zara done stepped it up though. Zara stepped it up. They done stepped it up. I'll pitch the old Zara. They stepped it up. And if you oldfashioned, I like uh J Crew. Go to J Crew. is is going to be better than Lane Bryant. Probably might be similar in price to Tory Burch, but probably a little less, but it's going to be more corporate classy. So, do that and build from there. Give me one second. One of my insurance agent And so understand that and realize that, get that in your spirit and just know that that's what you got to do. Like we are in desperate times. That's why I told y'all why I started the purpose pushers. Cuz while you waiting on a man, you need to be in your purpose. So if you ain't in the purpose pushing community, and I'm going to tell you something else. I'm going to tell you this. I hate to tell you this. I hate to tell you this. If you can't afford $47 a month, then you shouldn't be thinking about no man. Shouldn't be nothing on your mind but money. You need to be like Snoop Dog. I got my m money on my mind and my mind on my money. Ain't that Snoop Dog song? That need to be your only thought. That need to be your only thought. And because guess what? You don't want to go into a relationship. You want to be a help me, not a need help because that's how you desperate and that's how you get bought and that's how you get abused. That's how you get taken advantage. You need to be able to figure it out as an adult on how you can stand on your own two feet. And that's another reason too why I put that little price on there cuz I say as adults we got to be able to afford that. We can't afford that as adults. We can't we're not fit to call ourselves adults. Like if we can't afford to invest in ourselves and if we can't afford that, then we we are still a dependent. We still got to be called a child. And so if that means you got to get into your bag, get into your brand, start you another stream of income. And and even if you're not in purpose pushers, but what are you in that you are investing in you that's growing you? Where where is your is it into a stylist? Is it into a personal trainer? Is it into a dietician, a nutritionist? Like what are you doing that you are investing in you to take yourself to the next level? Give me one second. And so that's what you got to realize. The next thing that's happening today is the what is what's the boy name Dejon? Let me see. I ain't got to scroll too far probably before I see him. Yeah. Dejon. Dejon. That's the Dejon effect. The dating apps. So, it's a lot of dating apps that are not like Destiny. It's not slow. It's not intentional. And it's a smorgish board. You go in there and you got a buffet. And so, that's how he was able to find naive and gullible women to fall for his scheme. And having imagine, picture a grocery store and then picture everything in that grocery store being a different version of a human. That's what a dating app, that's what these dating apps, these big big big big big dating apps, that's what they are for these individuals. It's a situation where Give me one second. Sorry about that. I had a call come in. And so that right there is what these men are experiencing. And I'm going to tell you like I've never been on a date now. I've only been on dates and just go in there to look around, see how it work. And I can't even look around because soon as I got in, it gave me a match. Of course, I got the test thing on my account. So hopefully she saw it's my test account and just hit pass and went on about the business and ain't logged back in. So I couldn't look around because that ain't how my app works. You can't just go scroll. But if it said, "Hey, you got 50 potentials." And then I could just go and scroll through the women. I could only imagine what E boy feeling like. Like you getting to talk to so many women like man, you ain't f to get in no relationship when you getting to talk to all these women from all over and you could pick any one of them and you got to just have your deductive reasoning. You got to go through your process of elimination and you just basically trying to figure out who got trauma, who is a ho, who got this, who got that. And you just And that process alone take a long time. Is very fun, very intriguing, very addicting for men because men are in the power seat. And so that's also what's keeping a lot of men from committing. It's just way too many options. And even with that, you know, you might need to go to my mentor and book a session with me or another coach if you see somebody else specifying in dating coaching or something. I don't know if they know what they talking about, but and if you going to get on dates, you could do your session and get feedback on your pictures, get feedback on just how you presenting yourself. put your best foot forward because if you on there looking like who shot John and forgot to kill him because that that that fashion just ain't fashioning fashionable. It's just going to kill your reach. The man looking at that first picture and he clicking pass because you ain't put your best foot forward. You ain't get your right lighting. You ain't take it on portrait mode. you just ain't do what you was supposed to do, how you was supposed to do it. And so therefore, he clicking past, he going on about this business. I had to tell one of my matchmaking clients, I said, "Listen, in so many words, I basically told her, listen, you know, you you've been single your whole life, so don't expect to just find your husband in a few months when you when you've been out here every day for decades and ain't found him. So, it's going to be a process. It take time and you got to be patient with the process. You got to trust the process like the quote say. And so that just come with it. It come with it. And that's what you got to realize and understand and you got to be okay with that and got to move along. And so it's one of those things to where you got to be realistic. You got to be realistic. You got to understand that it's not gonna be the easiest thing in the world. Not gonna be the easiest thing in the world. One second. And this the thing. See the thing I I saw this quote and I felt good about it, too. I was like, man, all right. So the post on Instagram said that it was talking about like the sign of a wise person or a mature person or something like that, a leader. And what it said is that this person, a wise person can grow, like evolve and say, "Hey, I used to think this and now I think this." And they're not always set and stuck in their ways. And so I say that to say I was completely against dating apps and I still am against the dating apps that's out there. That's why I created Dates to try to give an alternative because I know so many people are getting on dating apps. Like it's a event that we were thinking about sponsoring coming up and trying to work out the logistics and the finances for Destiny. and it's a singles event and the couple that's putting it on, the young lady is a coach now. She's a black woman and then her husband is a white man. They met on a dating app and she is a dating and relationship coach and she says she tells all of her clients to get on dating apps because that's how she met her husband and I want her to promote Destiny when she tells them that. So, it's just a reality. I coached another client who's very successful in business and her therapist who also wears a hat of a life coach at times too. Told her to get on the dating app. She met her man on the dating app. So, I understand the world is changing. Men are not approaching like they used to. It's not the old days anymore. And you're going to have to get out your comfort zone, but you're going to have to do it with rules and with wisdom. And you're going to have to get out there and make it happen. And it's just one of those things. And so I say that to say you if you going to get on a dating app, you got to put your best foot forward. You got to slay. You got to do your thing. Got to eat. Whatever. Every little word y'all like to use. You got to do it. Clock it. Whatever you got to do, talk it. Tick tock it. You got to do it. And so get on on there and do your thing, but just have your rules and book a session with me if you don't know no rules or you ain't got no rules or before you go on a date with a man. And at the end of the day, don't look at like I can't know what I'm saying. I ain't got no mind unless you want to end up dead. So get your rules in place and do what you got to do. Do what you got to do. The next thing that is really holding these men back and this really ain't going nowhere and this is really frustrating to me because it's making me feel like something wrong with me. But then I realize I don't watch porn. I don't watch porn. I don't have a subscription on Only Fans. But I'm seeing so much content about you got to have sex every day and men want sex every day. And I realized, you know, when I was when I was a masturbator, that thing turn you up. Like it turn that libido up. It get you addicted to that feeling to that release and it make you very very horny. It make you want to you always on cuz your body calling your brain is calling for that release. It's just like if you smoke nicotine or you drink alcohol or you do whatever your body start rec your brain calls for that release. We need that that release. We need that wind down. We need that hit. Give us that hit now. And that's what it does. But when you stop masturbating that it's like it curves it. It goes it goes away. It goes away. And so you got to understand that. Give me one second. And so what's happening is these guys, a lot of these guys, it's one of those things to where a lot of these guys. It's one of them things you got to realize it. So, look at yourself in the mirror. And I don't want you to go on Only Fans. I don't want you to do that. I don't want you to go on Pornhub, none of these little sites that's out there. And I'm tapped in. I know about it. I heard about it. All that. I haven't visited either one of them because I don't want it tracing me on online. I don't want the ads popping up and all of that. And that's the God's heaven's truth. Like I just really pride myself on that level of discipline and I don't play with that. And I just And the reason I know how the brain works. So, I know if I go look at that, I'm going to be over there for a while and then I'm going to go down that rabbit hole. You going to go first you going first, let me tell you how the brain work. Now, for you don't understand, I'mma give you the male brain. What the male brain will do. First, you going to go over there and it's going to be you're a black man. It's going to be black women. Whatever black woman is your fetish, it's going to be a black woman. Thick thighs, thick booty, and she doing her thing. If it's if it's a woman that you could just find by herself and you heterosexual, then you just going to find her by herself. And after you find her, you gonna find a second one. You gonna find a third one. Next thing you know, you gonna have you seven women. and you going to sleep with one a day and you going to watch one on Monday and you going to wear that thing out. You going to let it get you a little bit of rest. You going to go to her next video. Probably the next hour you going to squeeze you another one out. You might you might knock you out four of them. You might go through four videos, get you four O's. O mean or as you might get you four O's. And now here's the thing too. what's happening. And this is what a lot of y'all women don't understand. The more active a man third leg is, the bigger it gets. So that's why a lot of times when y'all watch that corn and you might see this man with what you consider a horse leg, and I'm not naive to it. I done seen little clips. I I know what's on there. And just because I ain't never sat and indulged in it. I know what it is. And I know if you gonna do that type of stuff, you got to be a pro. Like it's like being in the NBA or the NFL. That's what corn going to be. You are the pro of that sport. And your sport is sex. And so you the pro. So you're not f to get on there with no three inch or 4 incher. You gonna get on there with you something on there. And so y'all might go on there and see that and be like, "Oh, that's what I want. Oh, that's what it is." Not even realize that ain't even regular. That ain't even realistic. But that's what you And you see her and you like, "Well, she's smaller than me and she taking it. Oh, it look like she enjoying it." And now that now that's what you want. Now you get with a regular man and he ain't got that. And you disappointed. And he just a regular guy though. And so that's the thing. So these guys, that's what they trying to do. They dealing with insecurity. I think I think I read a thing that say the average size of a man thing is 5 in or something like that. So if that's the average size and that's what the guy got and then he watching the corn and then he watching the woman with the guy and then this guy got him a little Louisville sluggle down there, the guy going to feel insecure. So that's going to make him be like, "Man, I don't even want to get no woman, man. Cuz she gonna laugh at my thing, man. My thing too low. He ain't gonna like my thing." So guys is going and getting surgeries. They going and getting plastic rod put in there. Whatever get put in there, silicone, whatever get put in there. They going and getting that stuff done. And some of them they go get that done and then become impotent. Thing don't work no more. And so it's a lot going on out here that y'all don't know about. Some of them might be flying to Colombia, Turkey, and getting it done cheaper over there trying to get them some more girth or some more length. And I don't know how that stuff work, but I seen a billboard not long ago, and it was like enhance your manhood or something like that. And I'm like, wow. So, it's like a lot of men struggling with this. If they doing advertisement and this is a whole procedure that these doctors are doing. So that mean so that means men are struggling with this and men must be out here real small or they done watch so much corn that they don't have a realistic idea of what the size supposed to be and they insecure about they sell and so that right there is driving I wish I could ask chat GBT but I I don't want that in my search history cuz I don't want chat to be looking at me like oh what is Tony going through you little freaky over here asking us what percentage of men watch corn. Oh my. [clears throat] Now I go to answer the question about the book and um Tony and with this book you know if you want to write it about corn we would suggest that you title it mystery mandingo. And I'm like, I'm asking you about my purpose pushers community and you giving me corn topic. So I ain't going to search that, but you could go search it and ask what percentage of men watch corn. If I had to guess, the minimum is going to be 50%. The minimum going to be 50%. The maximum the maximum going to be 90. The maximum going to be 90 to 99%. Because I honestly believe a lot of Christian man, a lot of Christian men struggle. I honest believe a lot of pastors I I honest believe that there's no type of man that has like there's a type of man but I believe that's those of us who are in our purpose like soul out to God and soul into our purpose like we all in on purpose and so that just that's not going to be everybody that ain't going to be everybody so a man could get there So you start dating him and make sure you make him join the purpose pushers community. If you get into his purpose, you got the best chance you going to have. If he ain't into that purpose, it don't matter if he work 40 hours, 60 hour, 80 hours. If he ain't thinking about purpose, he's not going to have a reason not to be choking the chicken. Not going to have a reason. Just how it work and just way the mop flopping and the cookie crumble. And so understand that. So these men are getting on there. They getting into that stuff. And the next thing you know, like I told you, you going from the black woman, then you going to the slimmer black woman. Then you going to a much larger black woman. Then you going to go to different variations. You going to do very, very dark. You gonna do medium tone. You gonna do light skin. Then you gonna go woman on. Then it's gonna be black on black, black on white, black on Asian, white on white, Asian on Asian, Hispanic on Hispanic, black and Hispanic. Like, you see how many variations? It's going to be voluuptuous black with petite white. And it's going to be so many variations, and you just going to be sucked in and you going to go down that rabbit hole. And then the thing about it is a lot of these men don't know how to stop and how to turn it off. And they end up going to transvestites. They end up going to fully gay. They end up going to children. They end up going to all kind of stuff. And so just that alone, that right there alone is taking out a lot a lot a lot of men out of the commitment pool because they caught up into that. It warps their reality. So now they don't know what to do. Like they get with a woman, they want to sleep with on the first night, they unwilling to wait. when they sleep with her, they wanna mutter out and do her all kind of ways. And she want to build up to that. She want to get to that point to where she feel comfortable with that. He want to just go right to it. Then he want to do more and more and more. If I'm not mistaken, that pastor thing that I watch, I I could have swore I heard that lady say he would pick up men, male prostitutes on the way home and take them home and have those men finish on his wife, if I'm not mistaken. That's what I heard. But I got to watch it back to see if I actually heard that. And so it just crazy crazy crazy crazy. So I want you to realize that it's one of those things where that's taking a large chunk of men out the game. It's taking them out the game and they sitting there and it's like they're afraid to commit. And some of these men, they're getting in love with these women. And there's no limits to the mind. The same way we got airplanes, we got spaceships, we got skyscrapers. I could imagine it's 10% of the eligible men that got print outs of these women got little photos in their wallet of the woman. Some of them probably got fullsize posters in their place that they got to go hide somewhere when somebody coming over. I believe it's at least 10% that's in a full-fledged relationship with these women. And I think I read or heard somewhere that on like Only Fans you could pay for like private messages and message the woman and talk to the woman and stuff like that. So it's like if that's the case, a man can create a whole relationship. He like Dejon Love just he the one paying versus the woman. And these women just getting paid. They getting paid. And these men, they ain't got nothing else to do with that money. and they single, no kids, might as well trick off on this woman and get you all kind of little videos. And then with these women, they making money. So there's no end to what they going to do. And the the man could send her a private message and say, "Hey, can you go get a a horsesized toy and do that to yourself for $1,000?" So she going to absolutely absolutely yeah if you'll commit the four weeks of this now he now he done dropped 4K boom she ride around in her range Rover her Gwagon you like what the real oh she turned out and he turned out cuz now he getting to see all of this then he goes and he gets with a regular woman everyday woman and then he bringing he bringing he he bringing the uh the tripod and the Yeti and he trying to put that Yeti in the woman and she like, "What in the world? What are you doing?" Like, "What is this, man? What's wrong with you?" Like, "What do you mean? I'm just trying to have fun. What do you mean?" But guess what? He done paid a woman $1,000 on that site to do something crazy like that. And she done attempted it and she might have accomplished it. So, it's like you just don't know what all these people getting into. And it's sad because it's so many torn, broken, battered women that they'll do anything because just to pay their bills because they don't know themselves. They don't love themselves. They don't got nothing going on in their life. So, they'll just do whatever it take. And and then you got these pubescent looking women like the young lady that I saw some guys. It's some guys who interviewed her. And so that let me know y'all subscribe to this woman channel. Y'all watch this woman channel and y'all jike off to this channel. But it's a p it's a YouTube channel called the coffee hour and they interview Only Fans porn stars. And it's like you got to do your research. How do you know who this person is? How do you know she exists? I didn't know she exist till I seen the interview pop up. And even after seeing the interview pop up, I still ain't going to search her. I still ain't go to a only fan page. But I know they did it cuz I could look at how they look. I could tell that they lame and corny and overlooked and ain't never had nothing and not making a little bit of money and now they want some access and they want them they want to trick off with them are. They want to get it all the way in. And so and and here are professional men who are multi-millionaires in real estate. They look like the youth pastor and they are wrapped up. These white men, they wrapped up and immersed in this porn. And so it's like think so if you got the youth pastor looking guy wrapped up in this stuff what the dope boy what the tough guy what the jock what the this what the that doing in it. So that's what I want you to understand that this is spiritual. So that's why you have to be at such a high level. And so with that right there at pointing the only fans, that leads me to my last point that's happening. These men are going down such a rabbit hole from that stuff. And I wish I could talk about this on Instagram and Tik Tok and everywhere, but I can't, you know, because they just they'll get censored like the stuff just so all over the place. But with YouTube, I can be a little more open. But these men, they going down such a rabbit hole that they ending up by. And that's the term that that y'all use for it by, but it's actually gay. So these men are actually gay and but they don't date men. They only date women. And so, but they want a man because of all of their explorations with the corn. So, they want a man, but they can only date women. And that complicates everything. So, they're going to drag out the relationship. They're going to make you wait. They're going to gaslight and manipulate. They're going to break up with you and come back. They're going to take you through the ringer because they know you want them more than they want you. They know that you honest and you're pure. You're only into men. You're not into women. And they know that you don't know that they're into men and not into women, but got to show like they into women as their cover up. So that's what happens with this situation and that's how you get bamboozled and it's unfortunate. It's unfortunate but that's where this thing goes from and it just happened. Y'all forgive my wife was sending me a picture of my son friend my stom play soccer and got head gashed. had to get stitches. And so it's just one of those things to where it's like here you have this situation. And so Instagram, dating apps, on site on and bisexuality. When you take those four things that I hit on between social media, dating apps, the nasty sites, and I man, you could that could easily wipe out 50% of eligible men. easily. Easily it could be 70%. Now, there's going to be a percentage of women that's into that same thing, but for women, I would guesstimate 20% minimum, 30% maximum. So, let's say, and let's do the math on this right here. And we just going we we going to use just round numbers. So you are let's say you got 2 and a half million women times 70%. So you got 1.75. So you got 1,750,000 women that's available. you already have more women than men. So if you got two and a half women, then that mean two and a half million women, then that means you got a million men available. 2 and a2 million available women to a million available men. And then you take off times 50% which we already know what that is. You take off and then you got 500,000 available men. So now you have 175 divided by 500,000. So now you got 3 and a half women to every man. And he and and these are the eligible men to eligible women. And so this man got three and a half women to himself that he got to choose from. And that's how the messages like Yoda Ya the awakening can exist because these are the numbers. And I just made those numbers up, but I'm just I'm just guesstimating. But you could feel it though. You could tell it when you go out and you look around and you look at your friend group. You look online. You could tell there's more available women than there are available men. There's more ready women than there are ready men. And so that's why you have to elevate. And what I mean by that is you got to go to the highest level. You got to get to your best. That's why I started black and fit.com to just create a time where Tuesday, Wednesday, and Thursday where I'm motivating people in their life and also to work out. And if you're on the purpose pushers, then you get it included in your membership. But if you're not in purpose pushers, then you go to black and fit.com, grab your membership 30 days free. And every Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday, I'm doing a motivational message while at 8:00 a.m. while you walking 30 minutes or you could walk at any time of day and just call in, listen to the playback. But I say that to say that's because it's so many women resting in complacency. And now there's women who really getting into it and they still not being chosen. And I'm going to tell you why. I'm going tell you the real reason why. The reason why is because men and women when when you get to it and you become a 1enter, you get delusional and you start to feel like you deserve more than you do. So I got clients who they got brains, brain and body. Some can even afford my year coaching program. So they got the brains, brain and body, but guess what? They want somebody out of their looks compatibility and they don't know it. And I have to break it to them a lot of times. And some clients get mad with me. think all of them get mad with more or get their feelings hurt. But I just that's my job. I got to be honest with you cuz sometime even your mama lie to you cuz your mama don't want to hurt your feelings and I have to be able to help people understand like listen okay the person you want the person you describing has perfect features. You have little Miss Piggy nose. Now, that's a cute nose, but it's a unique nose. Or you have Rihanna's forehead. It's a cute forehead. The Lord loves it. Your mama love it. But it's a unique forehead. You have Dejon love ears. It's okay ears. It's normal ears. Look like look at the little flick on my ear. I got a little flick. I'm married but it's a acquired taste. So it's like a lot of time people can't see themselves and be and not realize okay what's quirky about you? What's quirky about you? So if I was single on the market right now I have to realize my hairline is thinning. You know you can see through it. I got to go to Turkey to get my hairline done. That's going to cost me about five grand. I'm 510. So if a woman, most women want six foot or taller. So that's two inches that I'll never get. That that that ship has sailed and I probably will lose an inch just from gravity in my back and my body. So that's going to put me at 5'9. Got a flick in my ear, little elf ears. Got a deep wrinkle in my forehead from walking around looking surprised my whole life when I had forehead acne. Trying to hide the acne in the in the folds on my face. So look at all of that. Got to be realistic. So then how can I go and want this woman perfect ears, perfect forehead, perfect all her thirds are symmetrical, perfect smile, perfect lips, perfect this, perfect that, and she just look handcarved by God. How can I go and expect to have her and want her if I don't look on her same level of looks? I don't look like Acropolis and narcissist and narcissist and Achilles. I don't look like that. So, got the pipe down. And that's what happens when you become a 1enter. Like I know guys who are 1enter in their character, in their consistency, in their work ethic, but they 5'9. So, it's like, listen, you got to calm down because every woman want six foot or taller. And the women who don't care about height, a lot of times they don't have the face card or the look that you want, that you think you want. And then the women that you do want, they want, they want certain thing. They want 6 foot to 65. They want certain industry of a job, certain field for you to work in. They want certain amount of money that they want you to make because they so beautiful. Every man wants them. So they want a man that make a minimum of a half a million. Bring home a half a million in profit. So you could be making 200 250,000 and still be a quarter million short of your amazing, you know, business idea that you done created and you still short. And so that's what you have to realize and understand. It doesn't it's not easy. It's not something that's just so easy and it it catches up. So all of this comes into play. And what I'm going to tell you is what you got to do is you got to get to a place where you take and you get to a place and you get realistic. Become a 1enter. But look at yourself and be honest with yourself about what things do you possess that are outside of the everyday norm that a person will have to look at, take into consideration, fall in love with, get used to because it's not what they see on the movies and in the magazines and on the television. And once you come to terms with that and you're able to say, "Hey, I'm a 10 and everything." But because of this and this, I give myself a eight. I'm a eight. So if I'm a eight, then guess what that mean? I need to be okay with a eight. Point blank period. But hey, this Tony Gins, the gang hurt. It's hard to share it. It's hard to talk about it. And you got to realize that. You got to realize that. So understand that, get that through your spirit and join us in the Purpose Pushers community. Would love to have you there. We building live calls every week. Technically about five a week when you look at everything that's going on. So hop on on there. God bless you. Click the link in the description to book a session with me. Um, if the link not in the description, just visit mymentor.life and we'll go from there. God bless you. Talk soon.