When A Woman Gives A Man Too Much Too Soon!

Hey, hey, Tony Gos here. Y'all got to forgive him for this here lighting in here, but wanted to pop in and chat with you for a little bit while my wife and Tayen is at soccer practice cuz when they get home, I'mma have to go. But saw a young lady say that she like to cook and clean and all of that for her boyfriend. She like to do all of that. Y'all forgive her. This my uh my face mask right here. Cord for my red light. Red light face mask when I be doing my skin care sema check uh Omni Lux. And then this my red light red light hat. Get that for that hair. Yes sir. be sitting in here that red light treatment. So yeah, y'all forgive me. But young lady say she like to take and higher do send me a check. She like to cater to her man when it's her boyfriend. She like to showcase. She like to show she is a wife. And I always told y'all, don't give a boyfriend husband benefits. And every man be like, "Hey, how I'm going to know that you a wife if you don't show me wife things and and live and do like a wife?" Now, this the thing what you got to realize and understand is what the young lady was saying is she like to do that stuff. She like to do all that. Now, to my knowledge, she's single, so it ain't worked out. Cuz I'm going be honest with you. I don't think a married woman got a whole lot of time to be online bumping the guns. I really don't think a a married woman got a whole lot of time to be doing all that. So if you single and what you have been doing has not worked yet and somebody like myself who teaches on relationships all day every day says the opposite of what you've been doing then you need to look within and you need to listen a little closer. It's different if you doing your thing and it's working for you. But if it ain't working for you and you not becoming a wife, then you need to listen to other input from those of us who know what we talking about and giving you the game. Now, this what I'm telling you from a male perspective. cooking, cleaning, laundry, sex, oral sex, all that. Be that as it may, that you love doing it and you want to do it and you want to showcase, you want to audition for a man, what we going to do is we're going to take you for granted. I'm telling you the truth. Now, grown boys going to tell you the otherwise. is going to take you for granted because you given us everything and we have not earned it. We're going to appreciate it. We going to be happy you doing it, but that ain't going to make you get no rain. It's not going to make you get a rain. And that's why it's women that be cooking and cleaning for 10, 15 years and still ain't got no rain. Because the man is like, "Why do I have to give her more if she already given me everything?" Whereas women think the more I give him, the more he's going to think that I'm worthy of being his wife. And that's not true. He's going to say she has low self-esteem and she doesn't know her worth and she doesn't know her value. So, she is serving me and catering to me and giving me everything as a man. and I haven't even put in the work to earn it. Nor am I even being faithful to her, nor is she the only woman I'm dating and she flipping and tossing and doing all this, that, and the third. And that's what the man going to say. And he's not going to respect you. He's not going to respect you. He's not going to feel like, "Oh, she amazing. Oh, she doing this and that." No, he just he going to eat up your food. He going to let you do all of that that that you doing and and all of that right there. And that's just what you going to be doing. This architecture design. Y'all forgiven. Kind of curious what this bag is up here. Oh, this for my hat. I'm like this stuff up here. That's for my hat. with the hat I got on. Y'all forgive me. I just be having stuff in all around here. And so that's how he gonna see you. He gonna see you like that. He's not going to give you any extra benefits, any extra credit. It's not like he going to be like, "Oh, wow. She is amazing. She just so amazing. I'm f to marry her cuz she know how to cook beef stroen all. She know how to cook casserole, lasagna. I'm f to marry her. No, he fa to sit there and eat. And this what I've been telling women since 2007, since my first book, if you cater to a man, we are going to kick up our feet. A man is supposed to be a provider. We're supposed to work. And yes, we don't want to do that. No, it's not fun for us. Busting our butt and providing and getting a thank you in return. No, that ain't that ain't what we want. N. But I'm telling you what's going to make a man respect you because he knows that, okay, she not greedy, she not selfish, but she's not easy. She knows her worth. She knows her value and if you take and you just do all this for a man and he hasn't earned it, he knows that you do that for every man. So like the women saying who, oh I like to cook, I like to clean. I like to do this. I like to do that. Well, that let that let a man know that no man is special to you. That you're doing that because you want to do that. So if you want to do that, you want to do that for every man. So now that make a man like you less because he's like, "Well, it's nothing special about me to her because I ain't earned this. So this mean she do this all this slaving she doing. She do this for Tom, Dick, and Harry. And how am I to know I'm her husband and I'm the one if she do this for everybody?" Because she like to do it. And that's why y'all have to realize like it's important to listen and to learn from honest men that's giving away the game. And I seen men in the comments and like yeah that what you got to do and yeah got to do this. Yeah that all that right there. I said boy one thing about it is you could be dumb. You could sound dumb and a man going to let you be dumb. He gonna talk you right on up that dumb hill. He gonna let you be as dumb as you want to be. As lost as you want to be, he gonna encourage you in that. If you want to be a fool, if you want to be a do girl, he going to he going to hype you up so much. Oh yeah. Go right ahead. Yeah. Do girl. Yeah. If that's what you want to be, I guarantee you he going to let you be it. He not f to tell you, hey, you know, you're not supposed to be doing all of that for no man who's not your man. You ain't supposed to be cooking and cleaning and all that right there for no man that ain't your man now. >> Come on now. You supposed to be a you supposed to play a little hard to get now. And that's what he's going to tell you. I mean, he I mean, he's not going to tell you that. He going to let you. He coming over there to eat every day. And then you want to spend the night and all of that right there. You want to spend the night? Oh, that what he want. He want you to spend that night. Absolutely. He want you to spend the night. He want you to He want you to do his laundry. And And I'll be honest with you, and this is what a lot of women ain't going to understand this now. I've never done laundry because when I was a boy, my mama did the laundry. When I went to college, I might have did my laundry in college, but to my knowledge, I don't remember cuz I always got male woman. Always got me a woman. Soon by as soon as I got to college, got me a little white girl. was with her for a year, then got me a blight girl, was with her for two years, then met my wife, been with her ever since. So, I I cannot really recall ever doing laundry. And that's what I'm trying to tell y'all. Now, listen. the the two young ladies I dated in college but for my wife they doing whatever sex laundry cooking whatever it was didn't get no rain then didn't head take my wife did not know how to cook I don't recall if she did my laundry but my wife didn't know how to cook go figure the woman who don't know how to cook is the one I married. She learned how to cook over the years of marriage. Tonight we having salmon bake. Sushi bake, but it's salmon sushi bake with like the the sushi. Not know it's like the salmon in there, the rice, think crab meat, too. And then you have the seaweed with it. So my wife, my wife ain't no spectacular cook. Like she could cook now, but ain't like she chef Bard D now. And she do the laundry, you know. She she wash the clothes, fold the clothes. We got a dishwasher, so she ain't got to wash dishes. But it's like, go figure. See, the thing about it is that women don't understand about men is we are workers. We gogetters. The harder we got to work, the more we like a woman. The more we got to chase a woman, the more we got to do for a woman, the more we got to cater to her, the more we like her. Every real man knows that it is of the essence that we work for a woman's heart. Every real man knows that it doesn't mean you're playing games because you don't want to do all this cooking and all this cleaning and all of that. Like, yes, you should do it if that's a skill that you have and you want to show that you have that skill, but that's one meal a week. You don't have to cook for him five days a week for him to know you know how to cook. And he's not dumb. He knows that you want to be a wife. And he knows that he's not your husband. And he's actually he's not going to tell you this. I'm telling you this. He's actually going to respect you more the fact that I'm making sure I had turned it back on. He actually gonna respect you more. The fact that he knows now you're not cooking five meals a day, five meals a week for every man you meet. So now it's a treat. He get to eat your meal once a week. He get to wash you wash his clothes. But he also if he want you to wash his clothes he giving you vulnerability because there might be crud in his draws. It's going to be a it's going to be a streak in them draws now. It just going draw going to grip that booty and it it's going to be a little streak in there now. Even if it just dead skin coloration on them draws. So it's like he letting you watch some dirty draw. So he he might as well see you like a wife cuz now you got something on them now. Like draw had a little hint on them. Boy, them draw was sour boy. What you what you ran a marathon? And so that's a risk for him. And then now now granted a lot of women can't cook now. So you go to with that old salted chicken or that unsalted chicken, you might cost yourself a husband. So don't be so quick to get in that kitchen now cuz the food might not be good as you think it is. And same thing with washing clothes. Now you washing clothes. And this is the thing, a man really don't care about all that stuff cuz he could do all that stuff for himself if he need to. A man want a woman that got them three B's. Point blank period. And y'all got to remember brand don't mean that you own a company. It don't mean you're a billionaire. Your brand is also who you sleeping with. Your brand is what are you building on the side? That could be you got a blog that don't make no money. Your brand is what have you started that you can't be fired from? What have you started that you passionate about? That's also a brand. Brand don't mean when I was talking about no man wants a woman that's online giving relationship advice. Women was like, "Well, Tony, what about the brand? What about the brand?" They just built the wrong brand for a wife. You built the wrong brand. Brand don't mean talking online. Brand don't mean giving advice online. That ain't just what a brand is. If that if that's what you want to be your brand, okay, but it's not a man on the face of this earth that want to be with a woman that think she's a knowit all in relationships and think she understand everything about a man. No man want to be with that type of woman cuz he knows that she going to try to run him. He also knows she going to try to game him. She gonna try to play him. No man want to be with a woman like that. No man wants to be with a advicegiving woman if the advice is going to impact and affect his livelihood. If you giving advice about makeup, he don't care about that. You giving advice about women's bodies fitness and estrogen and hormones, he don't care about that. You giving advice about finances and credit, he don't care about that. But if you giving relationship advice, he the one got to be in a relationship with you. He don't want to be with you. If you know it all and you think you understand men and you know how to gain men, you know how to play men, you know how to get this and get that and you done shared all that online. You're writing yourself a single woman ticket. That's why the young lady who have the dating app and have the singles dating show is still single because there's not going to be a honest man that want a relationship advicegiving woman. It just it does not exist. I don't care what y'all try to tell me. And and the man that show up, he he bisexual or down low or he's a user and he coming to get a check. He coming to get him a F250 or a G Wagon or a Escalade or a Tahoe, whatever he into. He coming to get him a car. He coming to have him somewhere to stay, have a bigger house than he would be able to get on his own. And he coming to trap the woman. He coming to trap her because he knows she bumping her gums online about love and relationships. So now she got to live up to that. That's why my wife's so safe and sound and secure because she know I can't do nothing. So when I'm on the road, my wife don't care. She don't be checking to see if I got a woman in the room, if I'm cheating. Never once do she say, "You better not cheat on me. You better not talk no other woman. You better not. Never once do she show any bit of insecurity cuz she know me bumping my gums online has put me in a prison of relationships and love and success and brand and whatever else. And she knows that if I am stupid enough to go out here and do what swole buddy did, it's going to cost me all my integrity, all my respect, all my supporters. She knows that unless she is the blame. So what she just focus on is not being the blame. But she don't focus on chasing me and worrying about what I'm doing because she know my message holds me accountable. And y'all hold me accountable because you listening to my message. And that is different with a woman giving advice on relationships. So what you have to realize is men are peculiar and men want a very specific type of woman. And one thing about it is that woman is feminine. Femininity is seen before being heard. That's just one that's just one truth about it. So a loudmouth woman is going to struggle getting a man. And also a man wants or see this what you have to remember. And I done told y'all this a million times. A man will accept what you give. So if you want to give him head, he's going to accept it. If you want to cook for him, he's going to accept it. If you want to sleep with him, he's going to accept it. Just because he accepts it doesn't mean he wants it. And see, this is what I want you to understand. You got to determine who you want to attract. See, y'all be doing things that attracts gay men. And y'all be doing things that attracts feminine men, cheating men, lying men, weak men, soft men, grown boys. Y'all be doing those type of things. And then you get to a place to where you like, "Okay, I'm doing this. is this, but it's not working and you attracting this type of man because you don't listen to a real man. When a real man give you the game, you don't listen. So, I'm telling you, we like to work. We want us a woman that we going to have to work for. We going to have to push the limits. We going to have to show up and show out for that. what we want. We don't want nothing. See, the thing that what you got to remember, those of us who done had a lot of women, done been out there, it's always been easy. So, nothing about a easy woman is attractive. And that's coming from masculine, confident men. You don't want no weak, soft, insecure man. So why do all of this stuff for him that he going to be clapping up and praising when the man that's going to be ambitious and be able to be a provider and be able to be a leader, he going to want to know that you worth it. He gonna want to know that you humble, you kind, you you say thank you, you show gratitude, but you not Molly made, you not Sally slave. And he wants to know that. He wants to know that you know yourself, you love yourself, and that you have a backbone. Point blank, period. And that's what you got to realize and understand. So, I'mma tell y'all like this right here. You could determine what giving a man husband benefits are. You know, you you could determine that. And I'm going to be honest with you, it's not even realistic for me to tell y'all not to have sex until marriage. No, it's not realistic. It's not common. Not every man is going to wait. But you know what gets you that opportunity for him to wait? You working on you. you having your 3Bs. When you have your 3Bs, that buys you more time. A man expects less from a woman who have her 3Bs. Point blank period. He just he expects he expects less from her because he's looking and he's saying, "Hey, she she got this." You know, she got this, she got that and her body is amazing. Her ambition is amazing. Her mind is amazing. She has a lot to offer. So I don't have to take and like I I can't expect her to do this that and the third because she bringing so much to the table. She bringing so much to the table. I got to step it up and I got to meet her and I got to be bringing to that table. So the fitter your body is, the clearer your face is, the better your fashion sense is, the stronger your ambition is, the cool, common, collected your your conversation is, the better your emotional intelligence is, the more runway you give yourself, the longer that man is willing to wait. But if you come in and you don't have things in order, he's going to feel like he is the prize and you got to show up and you got to perform and you got to audition for him. That's human nature. And sometimes you have to flip the script. So it's like and then that's what we fail to do as humans. And so women be getting mad when I say that. Be like, "Oh, so Tony, so if I'm ugly, that mean I got to sleep with them on a f night." You ain't got to do nothing but stay black and die if you die. If you if you're black or stay white and die or stay Hispanic and die, Asian and die. That's all you got to do. You ain't got to do that cuz Michael Jackson changed his race. So you ain't got to do that [clears throat] if you don't want to. You ain't got to do nothing but die one day. So, no, you ain't got to sleep with him third night, but he might not stay. He ain't gonna stay with you if he don't feel you worth the weight. If he doesn't feel you have sacrificed and you have put in the work and done what you need to do, what you supposed to do, he's not waiting for you. Point blank period. He's not waiting for you at all. He gone. So, the harder you work on you, the more runway you give yourself. I went and walked 10,000 steps Sunday, I think, or Saturday. Then went and walked another 10,000 on Sunday. So, I was gone on Monday. I had to go do an interview with Big Bank in Atlanta. And my wife went and did her 10,000 steps by herself. She ain't went and did 10,000 steps in a in a while by herself. But when she seen her man stepping up, now she going to do Pilates and all of that and then she'll come walk a little, you know, walk, but not no full 10,000 step. But when she seen her man stepping up and her man about to get fit, she like, "Hey, let me kick in high gear." So what you got to do, flip the on the other, put the shoe on the other foot. Sometimes you got to ask yourself as a woman, okay, if you go get this man with with a pot belly, you know, he got a pot belly, he got a receding hairline, he got cuz he ain't got one of these. He got my hairline still receding, y'all. So this the only thing the thing work. So I'm not stamping this. So save your money cuz I ain't grow now. So save your money. I'm just on here. I just be doing it to do it. So don't even think some of y'all already ordered it. Don't order phone tell you to order it now. Go refund it. You wasting your money. Telling you now. And so you come and and let's say the man he 56 or 54 got him a stomach on him. He making 35,000 receding hairline or the went ball. You're not f to feel like you got to do cartwheels and somersaults. You're gonna be like, "This man better be glad I'm giving him a chance. He better be glad I'm talking to him because 99% of women are keep walking on his behind. So, he better be glad he he need to cook me a meal." That's how you going to be thinking and feeling. Now, you pull up on this man, you got your man, he's 6'4, he got a six-pack of abs. He makes six figures. So now you like, "Oh, I'mma have to cook. I might have to pop pee. I might have to do this. I might have to do that." Cuz this man is a catch. He got all of this. So that's the same way a man look at women. Not everything could be flipped like that because we are different people. We different creatures. But that's one of those things that can work like that. That's one of those things that it'll work like that. And so I want you to realize that and understand that. That is one of those things that you could look at that right there and say, "Okay, now everything else, you know, it's it's case by case. If a man sleep with a woman on the first night is not the same as a woman sleeping with a man on the first night just because of societal norms and what society done put out there. So it's like yeah on on on the onset yeah it's the same thing. Both of them sinned both of them nasty but society going to treat it different. One going to be seen as a hero one going to be seen as a zero. And that's just the unfortunate truth. It's not something that I condone, not something that I like, not something that I appreciate or respect, but it's the unfortunate truth. And the only men who don't care or who don't judge a woman for sleeping with a man on the first night is gay men, bisexual men, which a bisexual man is a gay man. Just using the term because y'all use the term. So realize and understand that and get that in your chest. Get that through your spirit and keep your head up. And I'mma keep bringing y'all the real now. I'mma bring you the real and make sure y'all check the links in the description. November 28th, we got the Purpose Arc Summit. So, come on out. When you sign up, you'll see the link for your discounted hotel room. Go ahead, reserve it. I don't think you have to pay for hotels rooms in advance. Let me know if you do so I can add that little note in there. But it should just be put a credit card in and reserve it. And my sessions are open on my mentor.life, but it's full price session. And it's two different. You'll see one hour, one hour. One is by phone, one is by video. So you book those. And just forgive me, it does give you my text, my number that I coach on. So if you book and the session hit and you ain't got no call from me or video if you sign up for the video then shoot me a text because I probably didn't check my email. I I it goes to my email and if I miss it. So that's what happened today. One of my clients client had booked the session with me today and I ain't even know cuz I hadn't checked my email cuz I've been on the road. So hey, God bless you. Keep your head up and shout out to all my supporters. Tony Gaston Family Foundation just posted on the community page about the single single moms program was really single parents program. So thank y'all so much for your support. Keep your head up and remember Friday August 21st getting ready to launch something amazing. So stay tuned and if you ready to step into your purpose then this is for you. So check check out the community page on my Instagram or the mailing list on Friday and join me. God bless you and we'll talk soon.