We Got Tattooed By The Jackass Crew (Season 08 Episode 10)

Hey, your coffee it's like an eight OUT OF 10. >> I FORGOT THAT. I think I blocked that out. But I'm happy you got engaged, dude. >> Yeah, me too. >> We're all going to die. [laughter] >> WE'RE ALL GOING TO >> SOON. SOON IT WOULD FLY LIKE THAT. >> YOU GET LIKE A REAL hot cactus or something. >> Then she doesn't talk back. >> Back scratches. Prickly sex. He would drink 20 cups of his own piss before having a little bit of this. [laughter] >> No, that's hectic [ __ ] >> Yeah, >> Jail. >> Yeah, >> depends. >> Welcome to episode number 10 of the Marty and Michael fully actual podcast, everybody. >> That's double digits. >> That's right. And it's episode number 10, which means we are halfway through the season nearly. And we've just come back from a world tour. >> It's actually erano. >> We've just come back from America and Matt had to stay here. He was here on his own and we he didn't come. We we didn't let Matt come and we had the best time. Us three, me, Michael, and James. We had went on this crazy adventure and met all these crazy awesome people and just experienced once in a lifetime opportunities. Just us three. He's looking up how to get a gun license. >> Why are you on your phone? We're in the podcast. You're being very rude to our our viewers. >> I'm working out some statistics. >> No, he's looking up gun licenses. I can see it. He's applying >> statistics of gun violence. >> Look, that's why we couldn't take you in America because guns are legal there and we couldn't trust you. >> Look, we went Yeah, we went over to LA. Uh we couldn't bring Matt. It was only um it was invite only, so we couldn't bring the Brown. Um but look, next time we'll we'll bring Matt. >> Maybe shake hand shake hands on that >> if he's good, >> Matt. shake hands on that. >> No, I would never want him to break. >> He's been denied. I saw it said it said application denied on his phone. >> Doesn't surprise me with your criminal history. But yeah, we went to LA. Paramount flew us over like really looked after us. It's We've never been looked after before. >> Usually it's like the like hotel like >> Yeah, the hotel was beautiful. Really nice. It was like amazing view of the Hollywood sign. Look down. Look down. Look down. All this cool like traffic buildings. Homeless man sleeping next to a [laughter] freeway. Yeah. And then on the other side, he was trying to build a home on this vacant land with >> Robs and sticks. >> And they gave us like like some spending money every day, free Ubers everywhere. Really looked after. >> Hard to spend the money. >> We were just like buying jerky and drinks and whatever we could to try and spend it all and tipping heaps. >> Tipping heaps with their money. >> Did you know you have to tip like regulated 20% is what's like sort of >> That's right, mate. Crazy. >> Wasn't that waiter cute? Every time you ordered the waffles, it'd be like >> naughty boy. Naughty boy. You naughty boy. [laughter] >> But then he made the marijuana joke twice. My man, >> we got married J like a whole bit. Anyway, >> we um we met the jackass guys. We filmed this like pretty tame video. The ideas we had to film with them to help promote the movie. They were all rejected because Paramount doesn't didn't want to risk any injuries and stuff. So, you know, they approved this tattoo idea. And um look. >> Oh, yes. >> Yeah. So this is drawn by Johnny Knoxville and Steo Tattoo it on. >> Don't show your ass crack, man. [laughter] >> Help him, Michael. >> It's so beautiful. >> It's so interesting cuz in Australia we say bum hole. >> But here it says >> butthole. >> But hole. But holes is definitely more American. You're right. >> Yeah, butt is like this. Hey, butt. That's my butt. It's butt Simpsons. >> And it could have been a lot worse the tattoos. So Steo kind of just went rogue at the end and just did that. Tell them, Michael. >> Tell them about your new friend, man. Dude, >> hurry up. >> It was so cool. So, obviously, you know, we're chatting to the guys and it was sort of like a bit of back and forth, but then >> suspense. See, he's doing suspense. >> Danger comes up to us and we have a chinwagon, a half, >> like a good half. Yeah, man. We I was belly laughing from his stories and [ __ ] and then like man we just were chatting and it was just hanging out with the lads hanging out and then >> you [ __ ] >> dude I was so >> they had a connection. He kept like danger kept like putting his arm around Michael and [ __ ] during the conversation. >> This [laughter] far away from each other >> but like his stories were hilarious as well as such a legend. Then he gives me his number. >> Yeah. Oh dude, you got to tell him the number story cuz you nearly [ __ ] that up. >> Yeah. Yeah. Here I am. I mean, he's doing this new tech thing where you put your phones together. >> You share your contact with AirDrop. >> He got rushed away and then someone >> Yeah. Someone came to get a photo with us >> and then like I was like, "All right." And then like instead of being rude, I was like, "All right, I'll just SC cuz I didn't know what was >> meant to press accept, but Michael didn't know that and just did a screenshot thinking he screenshotted Danger Aaron's number, but he didn't >> screenshot." And then I closed my phone >> and Danger Aaron said, "Text me tonight. I don't go on social media. Just text me." Um, so like yeah, just said text me tonight as he walks off. >> And then after the photo is done, I go to look at my phone and I see the screenshot and it's like accept or decline. >> And I was just so sad, genuinely like depressed for hours. We were trying to think of ways we could get it. We didn't want to ask anyone else that we met like, oh, can you Danger Aaron said that you tried to give us his number, but like just sounds like a lie. And you don't want to ask for a celebrity for another celebrity's number. It's just a no. No. >> Yeah. Yeah. And like it wouldn't have been so bad if I didn't genuinely just find such a great connection. It like >> and if you didn't say text me tonight. I remember very specific. >> I went from such a high to such a low. You guys would have seen I was very sad. >> It was for hours and hours and hours >> trying to think of ways to like and then we messaged him on Instagram and um and and thankfully later that night he he did he replied on Instagram and gave us his number and um yeah, it's been >> Michael screamed yes and did a fist bump. Not even kidding. It's in the vlog on the website. You'll see like the em emotional roller coaster that >> Jeff Tmaine we one of the creators of Jack said he >> he's the director mate. >> He said he's he um our videos pop up on his feed all the time and and like that the whole Jackass crew they knew about us so which was just so cool. >> Yeah. So man Poopies was a legend. So good to meet you guys. Yeah. There wasn't one like you know >> cuz they're not actors like what you see in the movies is who they are. So like very just lovable dudes and same sense of humor. England was beautiful. >> Spoiler alert on Dave England. This is incredible. Like I've done some >> on the website. >> But like for him to tell me like I go to shake his hand and then he's like, "Oh, sorry. Only my left hand works." And look and he's got a broken finger, index finger. And then he later tell Matt, unbelievable. >> I don't think that was me. Josh >> wasn't me either. Okay, look. >> Wasn't me. Look, index finger broken. I go, "What happened?" He's like, "Oh, look." So, we had to do a bit for the film and there's Zachass. Apparently, he fingered Zachass and then somehow got it so deep into Zach and an angle and then maybe Zack ass jolted and then he snapped his finger [ __ ] >> in Zach's ass. >> Yeah, that's so cool. Like, imagine that's so different. How could you break a finger in an ass? But yeah, he's done that and now his finger is bugging. >> Can't wait to watch it. We get the Paramounts. Um, they've booked out a Gold Class cinema for us next week and we get a private screening. So, we're real keen to see it. We haven't actually seen it, but from all accounts, it's like it's more of like a trip through the jackass history and it's it's like a um >> a tearjerker. >> Yeah, it's quite emotional apparently. Apparently Johnny Knoxville cries and there's some um new stunts as well, of course. >> Yeah. Look, so I've heard rumors about some Pontius high jump. Have you guys heard that? >> No. >> Don't know what it is, but should be cool. Well, that's the only shame about it was Pontius is away with May's wife on like a >> and we filmed with him before. [laughter] >> Jeff Jeff Tmaine said that. >> Yeah. >> And there so we didn't get to see Pontius but >> but we have met him before. >> Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. >> And spoke to him for a long time [laughter] >> and we spoke to his wife heaps >> and then >> so lovely >> and then we vlogged a bit and then it was all the way over to Michigan and that's like it's like flying from Brisbane to Perth nearly like long way. Yeah. Took so long. We had so many problems with flights. But anyway, >> it was a 15 15hour travel >> journey. This will make Matt happy. This is something for you, Matt, cuz you can obviously you've had a hard time. >> You got to watch Lord of the Rings on the plane. >> No, no, this is better. So, here we are heading to Chicago. >> Orlando Bloom. >> Look, we're in Chicago airport and bang, the boys are a few seats ahead of me and we've got school time to make our connection flight to Grand Rapids. So, the boys are like legit and I'm like hardly set up. I've been half like asleep, had nuts, had lots of peanuts, and then I get up and I've got the slowest [ __ ] brick next to me that's just taking their time, just doesn't even want to get out, letting other people. I was like, "Get out." I was rude. I had to be okay. And then I got rude, got out, and then I'm out front and I'm trying to do my phone and I'm just and I just see turn right and then there's like all the terminal numbers and this is the biggest airport in the world probably. Huge. Okay. Probably. >> Sorry, what airport was it? >> Chicago. And guess what? Here we are running down the blue caverns of the Chicago airport. Very world famous airport. Why, Matt? >> Go on. Come on. You can do this, Matt. >> Cuz Chicago Bulls might >> No. Come on. Running airport movie. Matt. Running late at Chicago airport. You can do this. >> Oh, home alone. Hey, >> dude. >> So, I'm thinking halfway. Here's my dilemma cuz I'm running. >> OH MY GOD. YOU WERE BEING HOME ALONE. >> I was sprinting and and there's few blow people. I was quite rude. Okay. I had to be I had to write and then here I am thinking having a dilemma of going should I put my headphones on and play the music that goes opportunity and I was like >> run Rudolph running like a merry go round that one >> but I don't know James is saying it. >> Yeah, that's the song. >> Yeah, it was like I'm thinking I got to play this right now. >> That's the Yeah, the it's in mall films. That's when the panic happens. Yeah. Anyway, then finally I make it and of course a plane's delayed anyway so it didn't even matter. >> So we get on the planes and then they tell us that there's a delay when we're on the plane. So you have to sit in this crammed up little [ __ ] plane for hours. >> Oh that plane >> 2 hours you're on the window seat. You're literally like this. >> Is that an American thing? Cuz I've never had it happen to me in Australia. >> Their population I'd say because their population is so big that there's so many planes and the airports are so big. >> So that's why because yeah it doesn't happen in Australia. But anyway, then we get to Michigan and we meet up with old mate Houston Jones. And >> before that, before we met up with [laughter] Houston Jones, >> guess what we got to do? >> Go on. >> We went tubing down a Michigan river. >> So sick, eh? >> Yeah. Look, I hated it. But the scenery was beautiful. >> The scenery was unbelievable. >> And it was like a river where we didn't actually have to push. There was a couple little rapids, few little ma mass like >> tailbone into rock. >> Yeah. Like Oh man. Seen the boys get hurt. We vlogged a bit of that, too. So pretty. Yeah. Yeah, we didn't know about it. >> It's going to be a good vlog. I reckon it' be a good a very good We did some funny [ __ ] >> We went for a bushw walk after that and we like probably one of the top 10 top 30 funniest moments of my life is and somehow I got it on film cuz I'm just filming the whole bushw walk cuz it's so pretty. And then here I am filming and then I turn to Marty and Marty's hitting himself with like bush leaves cuz he's got bugs all over >> mozzies. They were terrible. >> Covered in ticks. >> And then we hear this >> and it's a baby dick. >> Let's play the clip for him. Yeah, [ __ ] it. Let's watch for him. >> Holy. It's a baby deer. >> Oh my [ __ ] god, >> dude. You had us. >> This is probably one of the best clips I've ever seen. >> It is good. >> Yeah. So, there you have it. And um anyway, then we we get we get filming with Houston. And >> wait, before that [laughter] before that we cut. What about how pretty that that was Bambi in real life? There you go. More movie. More movie for you. And so sad too because not with its mom at that age. That's not a good thing. >> And it was limping. So it's definitely got killed by >> would have had by now its limbs ripped apart by two eagles. >> Yeah. 100% I reckon. >> Well, >> yeah. >> Yeah. And Okay. So, >> and then we meet up with Houston Jones and we film uh >> and we had a a place on a lake >> Airbnb. Yeah. Yeah. The lakes are so pretty. >> Oh, man. >> You would have loved it, Matt. >> It's so beautiful there. >> The food was just so good. >> I caught a widemouth bass. >> Yeah. >> There was like a little, you know, the summer camp, you know, the parent trap. You love the Parent Trap summer camp. >> I was thinking more Adam's family too where they go to the camp >> and then there's this this little platform where people swim out to and they climb up the ladder and they jump [clears throat] off platoon thing. It was America. We were in America basically >> and it was bath water hot, but he wouldn't swim out to the platform cuz it was too cold. >> I got in the kayak. I chased a duck and brought duck halfway back up. I was trying to Yeah. Anyway, >> splashing him with cold water on the tubing was also definitely >> that was a shame. >> But yeah, so many adventures and it was just it was like a very full-on trip, but um again just >> Man, >> what about Houston, man? >> Yeah. Yeah. So, we filmed with Houston Jones, >> man. Should have told that earlier. three videos for him and one for our our channel. So, that's all coming out soon. Uh first one of which will be uh will be already out. The the Lego one. Oh, no. The bowling ball soccer. >> Bowling ball soccer. You think sounds painful enough, right? No, they Houston glues pieces of Lego on it. >> So, you're kicking it and you're just cutting your feet up. >> Dude, it was that I thought it would be one of the easier videos. I reckon it was up there with >> graphic. Yeah, like Lego racing was tough. >> All that blood just mixing together. >> It was slicing Chris's and Houston's feet up. They didn't even care. I at one point was like, "Let's get good footage here." When I on a kick out, I I scooped it into Houston's kneecaps. Instead of going, "Ow!" He just marched forward and continued to get the ball. >> It's a different him and Chris, different breed, man. >> They didn't give a [ __ ] Then you look at their feet and there is slices everywhere. Think about this. This is like an eight pound ball coming into you with a potentially a dagger, which what it was coming. If it cuts the wrong spot or goes in the wrong bone, you're [ __ ] you'd have like your body. >> Yeah. And then that was mean. I'm apologizing for that. I didn't understand that reference. But anyway, just like a [ __ ] body, >> right? >> Yeah. >> Cut. Lots of cuts. >> Sorry, Matt. I was excited. We we got to test some of our favorite stunts cuz the video we filmed with Houston was um which painful stunt hurts the most. So we brought all of all our classics and the ones we did to Houston was the hand of doom Christmas paper wrapping and the squash ball. And it was just so funny seeing his reaction cuz they don't look intimidating. And then he we saved the Christmas paper wrapping for last and man it him up. He was so shocked. He gave that an 8 out of 10 which for that's like a 10 out of 10 for us. >> Yeah. Well it is. And like he's even messaged saying he thinks he's got a bruised rib [laughter] now. >> Yeah. >> From that one. >> And he's just he's like he's in total shock about I can't believe that can do damage. [laughter] >> His face you can just see like wow. >> Oh man. >> And then the squash ball hit. I [ __ ] up of course and hit it straight into his dick. >> He was wearing a cup but like he had his ball out >> and he's he's like he had to check his ball like five times and I felt I felt really bad about that. But then the perfect like slot. We split his belly button open, >> slices like right in the center. >> Oh yeah, direct shot woods probably. >> And then we asked Houston to give us some of his most painful u like stunts that he's done. And he pulls out a gun. So it was like a mystery uh punishment. So he pulls out this non-lethal handgun and shoots these rubber bullets at us. And man, >> oh yeah, >> this is like >> Have a look at this. >> Oh wa. Yeah. Like full scab in the middle. Then galaxy full just cut your skin >> and that's like that's like way better than what it was. >> It was like dark purple everywhere, bro. >> Yeah, it was a really hard two days. Four videos and it was just But when it was with him, it's like having like a little like relic. He makes you feel bigger and stronger than you really are. >> Yeah, he's a lot like he's a lot more protection with that dense muscle on him, >> man. Brass knuckles. Oh, >> do you reckon muscle is better than fat for taking harder? >> More dense, >> but yeah, he's uh very brave. Michigan in summertime is just a 10 out of 10. Man, that was so cool. >> So, uh really cool trip. But anyway, we're back now and uh we're bruised and battered, but on goes the train, as they say. [screaming] [laughter] >> Is that real? >> Yeah. He did the horn. He did the train horn after. >> That is not real. >> They say that in Germany. [laughter] >> On goes. >> Do we have some top comments, my brownie? >> No. >> Oh my god. Really? >> Last episode. Let's see top comments. And James wasn't here last episode. So James still has to tell us about his engagement. So we'll get on to that after this. But first, let's read the top comments. >> Um I will say there's a lot of RP to Jets in the comments. >> Man, I miss that from everyone. >> Yeah. Thank you guys. I've had a lot of lovely um Instagram messages. I haven't written back to them all, but um yeah, appreciate the love and support. He was a good boy. >> What do you want first? Go YouTube. All right, top comment came from Joshua Hughes 166. >> Punishment idea. Magnifying glass to the bottom. Call it hot dot. He also said, "RP Jet." That was 45 likes. >> That's a great idea. >> Hot dot. Hot dot dot. >> Maybe for um [applause] >> Yes, mate. Yes, Joshua. Yes, Joshua. >> That's a great idea. >> Yeah, it is. That's scary, though. >> Could it do it? >> Remember we tried to do magnifying glass magnifying glass? >> Leave it on there for a second before it's excruciating. [laughter] >> Imagine if you got right in the middle and there just happens to be a gap all the way to your intestine. Puncture a big hole in your intestine >> or you catch fire inside and you don't know about [laughter] it. Methane lights your methane. You spontaneously combust. You probably could, couldn't you? You like open your mouth and laugh and then your mates can see the tops of the flames at the back of your throat cuz your insides are on fire. >> Yeah. You want to be clenching your [ __ ] shut. [laughter] >> You want to be clenching it shut. >> Did you ever use it when you were a kid to burn things? >> Oh, yeah. >> I used to have a sister. [laughter] >> Killed her with a magnifying glass. Acting. [laughter] Her name was Magnus >> Michael. >> Sorry. It's sort of like magnifying glass. >> All right. Spotify. >> Spotify. Top comment went to Jordan Jacobs. >> You legend Jordan. >> Um, >> this is a good one. I think about Matt. >> Yeah, it's all about me. [laughter] >> Uh, if this gets top comment, Matt has to snort hot sauce. If he refuses, he must do a bong with Carver water, then drink the water or copper gut slog with a snake plant. >> Oh, 71 likes. What would you do out of those >> 171 likes, dude? >> That's so many likes. >> Yes, Jordan. Hey, look at me. [applause] Yes, Jordan. >> Yeah, >> let's do that at the end of this episode. >> At the end of this episode hot sauce right there, my brother. >> If you had to do one of the three, which would choose if you had to. >> It's not the hot sauce. Surely >> was the second. >> Oh, you wouldn't do the second order. >> You'd see the devil again. >> Oh, it' probably be snake plant. Let's be honest. But >> all right. Well, snake plant it is. No, wait. Wasn't the snake. >> I'm saving my body for the upcoming videos that we got. >> I see. >> Wow. Tactics. [laughter] >> Come on, man. >> No. >> Oh, that was a pretty good. >> Either we all do it together or we don't do it at all. >> Can't say that on YouTube, man. Come on, man. >> I get it. Come on, man. >> Too sexual. >> Yeah, cut that, Josh. >> Leave it in. >> Um, what was I going to say? Um, >> you have to do one. You can't. It's a top comment. No, I don't. >> 71 likes, man. I'm like, Jordan thought of that himself. >> Well done, brother. I applaud. >> We're going to do it to Matt secretly. The snake plant >> while he's asleep. >> You will see a snake plant. It's bound to happen again. >> It's disappointing. But yeah, sorry. Matt's >> he's denying it. I don't know. >> What should we do? Let us know in the comments when Matt says no. Like, what do we do in this? >> I just want a canvas for what? I know what's upcoming and I want to have a a fresh canvas because last season >> week, was it last? No, the week before before you went away, we filmed a few things and it took some time of recovery to get through all. So, do the hot sauce. That doesn't leave any damage. >> No, no, I don't want to do that. >> I'll do a line with you, brother. >> I'm not going to I'm not going to I'm not going to >> You're not going to please our fans. >> What about if I do a line? Do a line. >> We all do a line. >> I'm good. >> We'll all do a line together. >> Should we make a merch shirt that says Matt no brown? >> Or why don't we Matt no bound? Oh >> no. The brown always bounds. >> Mommy. >> Hey, look. Get the hot sauce out. Let's do a line. Really? How bad is this hot sauce? >> I don't think it's too bad. It's Frank's. >> Let's do it. I'll have a snort. If you have a sn >> He probably pissed in it. >> Actually, I did. I did piss. >> Looks like Did you actually? >> Yeah. >> Dude, I wonder what a line of fireball would be like. Oh, yum. Oh, man. >> Oh, look. We don't >> We got We got it last week. >> We don't have hot sauce here. >> I came in. >> So, this is the piss bottle. >> This is what the hot sauce looks like. And Frank's is supposed to be red. So, >> he's pissed in it. That's what he just said. >> Oh, is that true? I'm glad I'm touching it. >> Oh, yuck. >> Sorry. >> It's just a little piss. >> Is this normal or has this got things in it? >> No, I had a shot of it last week. >> Wow. Was it nice? >> Yeah, it was all right. It burns. It's all right. >> Just want to have a sneer. [ __ ] Have a little >> Have a sweet. >> Yeah, have a sweet. >> You won't. You won't. >> James got absolutely hammered drunk on one. Oh, this is another thing that happened in America which gave us the idea for this week's prank call. This like this restaurant. You would have loved it because of the history of this restaurant. It's like the oldest oldest restaurant in Hollywood. >> All of the like big A-list celebrities go there. They have like regular booths and stuff. >> Marilyn Monroe Ro is next to us. >> 3 months 3 month wait to get a table here. And James calls up and makes some [ __ ] about some massive Aussie comedians in one night. There for one night and they go, "Come on, come on in." And they let us go in and the waiter told us like that [snorts] used to be where Charlie Chaplan sat and he sat there so he could watch his horse tied up at the front. It's how old it is. >> All these crazy stories are cool. >> Jack Nicholson's had a spot like that. >> Mafi Big B someone and he sat in the corner, went home, got killed. Yeah, >> that was his last meal at that place. So many cool stories. So many. And we were just rolling our eyes. Whatever. Whatever. Stupid movie. >> You would have loved it. >> We saw Gwennneth Poutro there. >> You guys have no culture. >> And the Jackass crew just so happened to be in the private room while we were there as well. We didn't go say hi, but he was we were like, "Oh, is there any celebrities in tonight?" And he was like, "Yeah, actually the jackass crew is in the private room." >> So, it was meant to be. Yeah. >> Even though we didn't talk to him then. >> Man, it was good food. Do >> you remember the name of the place? Uh, >> yeah. Uh, Muso, Muso and Frank. >> And we told people, >> I made that up. But no, that actually is it. >> Is it? Yeah. Yeah. And um, >> great food. And they have this drink, a martini, and they just come out with a like half a glass of vodka. Was it? >> I was lit from one cocktail. I don't drink much, but I was like, I have a martini. They're famous for it. Yeah. It comes out, you get the martini, and then I was like, what this? There's just this bottle in like an ice sitting there. You pull the bottle out and it's just like another like I reckon like 300 ms of martini just pure alcohol like I'm drinking it >> and then bang hangover the next day on the jack from one drink. No, I had two actually, didn't I? I had something else. >> They never caught the guys and murdered Bugsy Eagle. >> Wow. >> They're still out there. >> Wow. >> They're bloody eating bloody there. Bloody right bloody now. Bloody Wait a minute. He must have bloody tipped enough. You stupid. [laughter] you [ __ ] >> Sorry. >> Yeah. >> But yeah, so US, there's lots of [ __ ] we're probably forgetting, but yeah, the we we'll have a vlog out on the website. >> It'll be a big vlog, too. Big cuz it just >> lots of funny [ __ ] happening. There was lots of funny. >> Yeah, look, >> I remember laughing a lot. >> Marty discovered his inner like American character. >> You did some public [ __ ] too. By the way, there were moments where Michael just got real cringe in public. He brought back the buying the car outright thing. It was >> remember we that cafe we went to after Skid Row. >> Oh yeah, dude. You were Marty then. >> You were being a vlogger. >> We were cringing. >> Yeah. I like trying to be like we were like >> real cringey. >> Just like a cringe vlogger like acting like all right. Yeah. >> Yeah. A little cafe, right? And just a few nice tables of people and Michael's like, >> "Hey, you coffee? It's like an eight OUT OF 10." LIKE >> I FORGOT THAT. I think I blocked that out. There was a one guy sitting over in the corner was literally just looking at you with a face like he just wanted to king hit you from behind. >> Yeah. Well, it said it was an eight out of 10 on on Google. >> Did you feel at home at Skid Row? >> Look, we got we got rocks. >> Did you wear shoes? >> We didn't actually get to the We saw the midpoint, but we didn't walk down it because there was rocks being thrown at us. >> Yeah, me and James were like I wanted I wanted to go in the eye of the storm. >> Why were they throwing rocks? >> He was filming >> filming on the ground. So much homeless droppings everywhere. Dude, so [laughter] homeless >> big on the ground, dude. It was so You loved it. >> I was getting closeups of it. [laughter] I like what I like doing was filming them really intensely and having just people walk past like they like they're like, "What's that?" And they [laughter] see I'm just filming really >> passionately. Anyway, you'll see website. It'll be out in in probably like a month. >> And all the Houston Jones footage will be coming out, too. And our little thing that we filmed with Jackass will also be on social media for free. So, there's plenty coming out that's not on the website. >> [clears throat] >> But anyway, James got engaged. There's nothing. We don't work. But yeah, it was hectic, man. It was so much planning, eh? Like so scary that she's going to find out. Like I I was showing her I was showing like one of our videos from the day once and I like had the little it's called like a CAD, like a 3D design of the ring in my photo thing. And so I'm like going through my thing showing her and I see it and I literally just shut my phone down. I was like, "Anyway, there's not [clears throat] much to see." like sort of just tried to but she didn't catch on to that. There was like 10 other things, so many like opportunities for her to find out. But I lied to her and told her we were going to like a gender reveal party. And we got there and she's sort of like looking around at this like really cool Airbnb I have with this awesome view looking around like really confused as to why there's not that many people there. And I had like the little proposal area set up with like flowers and and nice sentimental stuff. And she's still just like looking at it. No idea. no idea until we're literally like standing opposite each other and then I could see her brain go, "Holy [ __ ] is this [laughter] happening?" But it was so good. Such a fun weekend. Such like a Yeah. Massive massive moment. >> What did you say? >> Yeah. >> I write I I wrote something. I was like, >> "Did you read it?" >> Yeah. I was like, "Fuck like improvising. I'm going to be too stressed." So, I just like stood with her and held her hand and just like pulled out this piece of paper and just like read it to her cuz it was so much >> What did you say again? I I I was trying to write something but I was like [ __ ] nothing because everything sounds corny because you're trying to be like beautiful and romantic. I can't do that [ __ ] >> So I just put it and I knew you have the little like uh thing that the container that ring goes in. If you got that in your back pocket, you're [ __ ] >> You have to have the ring only. >> So I had the ring in a little baggie like a drug bag. >> Oh, sorry. Why are you f >> Cuz the box is so big when you put it in your pocket, they can see it. >> Oh, okay. I hid mine in like a big jacket like this and I put it in the pocket and just held my jacket over my arm so I could sort of just like sneak in there and grab it. >> See, I just got down and said, "I don't know what to say." And then I just held it up. >> No, you didn't. [laughter] >> After Amber set it up because she was doing a business where she set up date nights >> and Amber was so stressed cuz me and were watching. Amber's so stressed setting everything up. Michael's just sitting there watching her. [laughter] >> Freaking hell. Hurry up. I'm stressed. And then she finally finishes setting up and Michael just says, "I don't know what to say." >> Yeah. >> But [laughter] it's the thought that counts. It's like Christmas. >> It's basically Christmas, I guess. Yeah. Yeah. I put a lot of thought into it. A lot of thought and a lot of time. But man, she's the best. I'm very lucky. So, thank Marty's Marty's wife introduced us, which is just like I I owe them for life. >> And Michael and Amber as well. So maybe Matt >> did she introduce him or did they meet by chance? >> Came because >> I was there at their house for me. >> Yeah. >> But yeah. So maybe >> maybe have a chat to set up a meeting. >> You could look it can be like imagine you get like a real hot cactus or something. >> Then she doesn't talk back. >> Back scratches prickly sex. >> So I don't know. I'm just on the way. >> That does that actually does sound nice. Yeah, I know. >> And we get a Bucks, boys. >> Yeah. >> Why are you looking at me? It's him. >> And we get another when Matt gets married. >> Funny is getting married. [laughter] >> Um, what's the plan for? Should we go go-karting or something? >> Yeah. Yeah, we'll just go go-karting and then wrap it up by like 3:00 p.m., I reckon. >> Strippers you want. And we got all your 40ths next year, too. >> Yeah. Me, Luke. I worked out today, Matt, in double our lives, we'll be dead. >> So we we're past the halfway point. >> Whoa, >> man. That's 80 something. >> And the second half is probably like goes way quicker. >> Oh yeah. >> So really, we're we're 70% done. >> Quality of life is [ __ ] because you got problems. [laughter] >> You got problems in your second half. It's like you'd rather be dead. >> Dude, that's so >> But I'm happy you got engaged, dude. >> Yeah, me too. [laughter] We're all going to die. >> WE'RE ALL GOING TO >> SOON. SOON. IT COULD FLY LIKE THAT. THINK ABOUT HOW quickly it's gone now. IN A DOUBLE DAY, ANY DAY. ANY DAY [screaming] NOW. >> PAST HALFWAY. >> THINK HOW FAST IT HAS GONE. >> YEAH. And that it's you got 30 years left. >> Think about how fast it's going now. Like, so the the next half is Yeah. That'll be gone. It'll be gone like that. A year when you were 10 years old felt like so long. Now a year is is A MONTH. SO, WE'VE REALLY GOT 12 MONTHS LEFT. Red Dead Redemption. >> And in that time, we got to watch our parents die, OUR MATES DIE, OUR BODIES DETERIORATE, BOY. AND WE SLUMP OVER. [screaming] >> MY MOM GONE. [laughter] OH, DAD. OH, DAD. [laughter] >> NO ONE. DIAGNOSIS AFTER DIAGNOSIS AFTER [screaming] DIAGNOSIS. HOLY [ __ ] >> Problems are arising and the climate change. >> It really drives it home. Enjoy the moment >> cuz we're Yeah. congratulations on you guys. [laughter] I'll see you at the Bucks and the wedding. Well said, boys. That should be like a motiv. We'll clip that and we'll have a motivational unmotivational speech. But anyway, look, we got a jam-packed episode. All right. We got the $100 challenge makes a return. We got fussy little boys. Uh we got a prank call. We got a prank call. That's That's We've got an idea and we're going to do it. And of course tinders and some PO boxes cuz Matt's [ __ ] obsessed with them. >> No, I just I just don't want it to get forgotten. >> That's right. >> And the people >> love giving us gifts. >> People mean something. >> Michael. Michael, don't. Okay, do it. [laughter] >> I farted on your hand. >> Worth it. >> He caught it. [laughter] You can hear the distress in his heart. Touch my balls. >> Now there has been like serious like if if this if their friendship wasn't like volatile enough. This athletics this athletics thing is really causing some arguments. We had to stop it in planning yesterday and be like we'll talk about this on the podcast. Did we >> got heated? Yeah. Oh yeah. >> I worked out why Matt thinks he's good at discus. Why? Because think about the words in it. Disc. Sorry. I worked out why Matt thinks he's good at disc wise. >> Leave that in, Josh. >> Ass loves it. There's an S in there. >> Yeah, I don't know. I was going somewhere with it. >> So, Michael won Michael's up one nil in the events, the backwards run. That was at the very end of the last episode if you want to have a watch. And today, we'll be finishing this episode with three discus throws each or just one. I reckon we do need to do more than one because like I've I've set out the like the V and because our yard is quite thin, I think it's not quite regulation. So, I think we do need to give you the chance to throw straight more than once. >> All right. Do we get three? >> To make it fair, why don't we >> We're doing an average. >> You just >> No. No. This is just the person who gets the furthest. That's our discus. Yeah. >> Spooky. >> That's our discus. >> Yeah. [laughter] >> Like Matt's trying to scare him. [laughter] Yeah, but Matt's Matt's got an advantage because of the hand size. I can't get my bloody weight to him and my arthritis from that stupid accident. Now, my fingernails the size of bloody balloons. I can't actually grip cuz this finger doesn't actually bend all the way. >> You'll be all right. It's not that big. >> I'm disabled, Matt. >> You know, you'll be good. >> Disabled. Don't be like that. Yes. [laughter] >> What are they paying? I reckon it's relatively close >> cuz Michael's more explosive and faster, but Matt's got the weight behind him. >> Yeah, but Matt, think about when Matt throws a ball. What that looks like? >> Yeah, I know. But this is just slinging the arm. >> Yeah, true. It is his sort of forte. >> Are you confident today? >> Oh, no. Okay. [laughter] >> I haven't thrown a discus since like How are you? >> Well, Michael's not doing it every morning either. >> Yeah. I haven't seen >> Oh, both of us. It'll be >> I think year four, year five. >> Yeah. So, I don't know. I think it's anyone's game, >> man. There's so much respect now. Yesterday. >> No. No. I will win. I will win. There's not one athletic event that Matt can beat me in. >> Matt, stand by that. [laughter] >> I I wish you um >> I wish you good fortune in the uh in the games to come. >> Come on, Matt. Mate, you sound like those people who eat those cookies called fortune cookies. >> That's right, mate. >> No, I'm not gonna I'm not going to be suckered into your trap. >> You got to get the mind games going. Look at Conor McGregor. >> Have you ever heard of Peter? Go on. >> Hey, Peter. Hey, Peter. It's disappointing. I thought there was going to be a punch line. >> Yeah, [laughter] >> it works though. It angers Matthew. >> Yeah, he pissed me off a bit then too actually. So, we should do fussy LITTLE BOYS, I RECKON. [screaming] >> LET'S RIP IN. Should we have a bong break or just Yeah, let's have a bong break. >> Yeah, go on. Suck one down. >> Rip a bong. Have a car. We'll be right back with fuss. >> Hey, Peter. It's time for some fussy little boys. Fussy little boy. These are fussy boys. >> All right, it's fy little boys. >> Die. >> No, [laughter] you promise. >> I promise. Now, Ollie, >> did you research? >> Yeah. Yeah, of course. Ollie, thank you, dude. I lit, this is the one where I put it out on Instagram and I said, "I've been trying to find this ingredient for literally years and Ollie messaged." He goes, "No worries, mate. I'll bloody go buy it from you. I'll go buy it for you from the shop and I'll post it to you." And he communicated amazingly. Got it all done. It was here within bloody a week. >> Sounds like a serial killer waiting to act out on his [laughter] frustrations with watching my >> Also, what I'm worried about is the travel time. Food erupts like a volcano. >> Pickled. It's a pickled food. That means it lasts longer. Last >> it changes though when it's up in the air in a plane. It changes its molecular structure. >> That's right, mate. Yeah. Yeah. But that could be all right. >> It could hurt. >> You know my mate Alec um who lives in Sydney. He's British. Yeah. So this is very common food in England. And he messaged me. He was like, "Have you guys tried that before?" And I was like, "No." And he was like, "The boys are in FOR A ROUGH TIME." >> OH, YAY. YAY. I like it when you're rough. Will pickle mean it's salty? >> Very vinegary, which honestly me and Marty would probably suck this down. >> Have it with a bit of cheese on a cracker? >> Here we go. And it begins. >> All right. Do you want to sit here, Marty? >> Yeah. I'd love to. >> Great idea. >> I'm sad. >> All right. Here it is. Good old Barney Seafood. Eh, Barney seafood. Jellied eels. [laughter] >> Jellied. >> Farmed. >> Why do they call a jelly eel? So that means these these these fish have been raised in a small dirty little puddle. >> A little puddle. >> Oh man. Eels really has a bad taste in my head because of you sending that picture of your which look like little black [laughter] eels. >> I did do that. >> I had a bad tummy in America and [laughter] I sent a photo of my weird [ __ ] to the boys and just wrote eels and it looked like little eels. [laughter] It was so now I got to eat an eel. >> So the ingredients are water. M yummy. Hydrating eels. [laughter] >> Angigula restraata, which which in bracket just SAYS FISH. >> OH, >> THEY MUST THERE MUST BE LIKE some fish in here, too. Gelatin, spices, parsley, salt. So, very healthy. >> Yum. Apart from the gelatin. It's weird that they jelly they jelly it up like that. >> It's not right. I don't know. >> Well, that's the jelly part, mate. Don't look everyone. No. No. You're not meant to do that. Oh, so thick. [screaming] [laughter] >> OH [ __ ] >> WHOA. >> What happened? >> See, this is what I mean. We don't know what he's done to this. >> I don't know if I can. >> Oh sh >> What happened? >> This is what I mean. It could kill us. >> Smells off, eh? >> Yeah, it does. >> Whoa, dude. >> Oh, you know what? It kind of smells like certain. >> Yeah, it does. >> Oh, I can smell it already. >> Let's look up if it's meant to smell. >> Dude, that is that is like >> Yeah. Can you pass me my phone, please? >> That is like a It's a smell. >> Paul, [laughter] >> what are they called? Gelatin eels. >> Jellied eels. >> Ask GBT. Here we go. >> Paul. >> Oh, dude. >> Are they meant to be refrigerated? >> Yeah, true. >> I don't think you can eat them, >> dude. They smell off. >> I don't want to die. >> Oh, thank god I um sprayed myself with sprays. Let's see what ChT says. >> Is this meant to smell? >> It's meant to smell fishy. >> Poor. >> It shouldn't smell rotten, ammonia, or truly spoiled. That would mean it's >> fresh jelly deals are usually meant to smell mildly of the sea or fish. Slightly salty or briney. They should not smell sour, ammonia, rotten fish, sulfur/eggy, fermented or off. Damn it. >> Oh yeah, I think we can't eat those. >> Ollie, I'm so sorry, man. Oh, I'm so glad. >> Oh, look at this. From the label, I can see a used by date of 11th of the 5th, which has passed if the photo was taken recently. [snorts] >> Damn, man. >> Yes. >> Oh, yeah, dude. That is stench. >> You still have to eat it, >> man. I can't I can't die. I only got 30 years left. >> Ollie, like if Look, guys, you know what we're like. We would force them if I wasn't genuinely concerned they may die, but that smells like they would die. >> That's food poisoning. That's food poisoning. >> And look, it was off two months ago. >> Ollie, I'll bloody reach out to bloody you on bloody Instagram, brother, and maybe we can work out a way, a different way. >> Maybe Ollie wanted me to die. >> Yeah, maybe Ollie >> has it in for us. >> Drink piss. >> I'll drink some piss. >> Good boy, Michael. >> Michael's going to drink piss. >> Oh, my golly's in there. >> Matt could do a shot of UM FIREBALL. >> OH, LOOK AT THAT. MATT. Oh my. You >> So much's happening right now. I don't want to really want to drink my golly, but I'll drink some piss. >> Can you smell it? >> Why is it so milky? Oh, dude. Dude, dude, look out. It's hanging. >> Stretch. >> It's hanging. [screaming] >> Dude. Dude. >> Oh, yuck. [laughter] >> He drew the letter U. >> Is that it? There. >> It's a V. >> Sorry, dude. >> V for victory. >> And then you're not going to drink. [laughter] >> You drew Matt's hat. >> All right. And >> damn. >> What are [clears throat] you doing? >> Drinking some piss. >> Oh. Oh, he's genuinely going to drink some piss for you guys. But that's honestly to him it's >> He would drink 20 cups of his own piss before having a little bit of this. Dude, that honestly would kill them. >> Yeah, it doesn't smell good. >> Oh, it went on me. Went on my clothes and my seat. >> Is it in your hands? >> Oh, yeah. >> Maybe wash your hands. You don't want that. >> I'm going to go. It's the golly. The golly that turns me off on this. >> Watch Josh. Watch him. Josh, watch. The >> Josh watch. >> What's up? >> Josh is gagging. [laughter] Look, >> man. It's It's a lot. >> That was hot. >> Stretched piss >> lemon crisp. >> All right. Sorry. Look, that's fussy enough. >> The fireball. >> Sorry, guys. >> I won on that. Fussy boys. >> I guess you did in a way. >> Of course you did. >> Next week, next week we'll come up with something else. Very sorry about that, but that would kill that. It' just be me and Marty on the podcast now. >> Nobody's challenging you on that. >> I'm better than you. >> All right, we're going to quickly clean up and we'll be right back. Jesus, man. >> Man, that smell was quick. >> My area stinks. Well, good news everyone. >> Fussy Little Boys is not over. It's a very easy week for Matt. Michael is going to try an organic meat stick. >> So, look, he hates the These are the These are so delicious. >> Hang on. Hang on. That's not really fair. >> Why? >> Cuz I will eat 15 of those. >> That's all right. >> Seconds. >> He'll also like Imagine him forcing you to drink his piss or having green leaves. >> But I wouldn't do it. >> Touche. We I I'm not a gnomomen. Okay, >> Michael puts the entertainment first. >> I've got movement. >> You like to peel your own, wouldn't you? >> Oh, yeah. >> Like a force. >> You can give half to Matt. >> Do you want half, Marty? >> We'll just have it for enjoyment. >> How the [ __ ] does this work? >> Just at the top. Might flip it over, Michael. >> 3 2 3 2 1 flying to Marty's hand. 3 2 3 2 1 Going to throw in 3 2 1. Oh, >> I can smell them. >> Oh, dude, there's so many layers. >> Oh, it's it's slimy, Michael. Look at the >> Oh, Michael. So other way, Michael, other way the other way. In fact, >> the meat on the inside is is >> Michael's [ __ ] >> That's all the bits of cartilage and stuff. The outside is an intestine. >> Look at the juice it sits in, Michael. Look at how wet this is. >> Look how plasticky Michael, Michael, >> the layer of plastic they put in there. You can eat it. >> Sits in like meat water. I reckon he's going to like it, to be honest. [laughter] That is a Oh, >> he doesn't mind it cuz it's similar to salami. >> It's like salami. >> He likes [laughter] something. >> Yeah, I like the idea. It's >> It's Yeah, >> the wetness. What about the wetness? >> Yeah, I don't mind. >> Oh, pickle belly eel seat. Poor man. >> I really myself there. >> It's still not right, but I'll eat it. >> Mustard. Would you have it with mustard? Oh gosh. [laughter] >> All right, we're going to try a prank call. >> Oh, hit the prank call, Brown. [laughter] Seizure. Oh man, this changed. >> There's chunks. >> Yeah. Gets in between your teeth. See? >> No, no, no, no. >> Not a fan. Oh, >> you pick up when we call. We'll waste your time. This trip you fall. It's time for prank call. Not the number four. I meant four. As for the prank call. >> All right. Now, >> that was just that's chew. >> Okay. Just let's just just chill. That's >> uh it's meat. It's fresh meat. >> Yeah. It's all ground up crap. >> Fresh is a stretch. What we were trying to say before we got distracted with that restaurant we went to, James obviously called up and we were like, "Hey, we're blah blah in Australia's in top me and my men coming in one night. Get us in your restaurant." Bang. Got it. So now we decided we're going to do something a spin-off of that by calling up sort of like some flashy places like the Hilton. >> Yeah. So what we're going to do is we're going to see I'm going to pretend to be Matt cuz Matt is the only one who would do something like this. This could be very cringe, but we're going to call hotels and ask them how they handle highprofile >> uh what do you call someone who stays at the >> influences? >> No, high-profile what? Like customers. >> Celebrities. >> High-profile um residents. >> Uh what's the word? >> Yeah, this this could be very cringe. Okay. So, basically going to call and just say, "Oh, like how do you handle like highprofile patrons?" and then just see what see what we can get away with and be like a wanky kind of like influencer wannabe thing. >> Someone who like de not demands but like just expects. >> Um should we ask for like guest relations? Is that a thing? >> Guest relations? >> Yeah. Isn't that where you go to get all your extras? >> Do you have a guest relations team or what? >> Yeah. >> Welcome to help you. Hey, um just calling seeing do you guys have like pen houses and stuff available at the moment? >> Are you referring to a suite by any chance? >> Yeah, just like the most expensive rooms that you guys have. Are any of those available at the moment? >> Is this going to be for tonight? >> It'll be for tonight and then probably I'm going to say through to Sunday. through the Sunday. So until >> like check out checkout would be on Sunday, but I just have to check with my manager to confirm that. But I'd like to just book in the next three nights. >> Three nights. Understood. Thank you so much for letting me know as well. All right, let me just check that further. >> Yeah, that's okay. You can do that. [snorts] >> For how many guests? It'll just be for one and then my manager will sort himself out. >> Understood. So, under our standard rate, we have an available standard suite. So, this is our most expensive suite for the uh for tonight available at our hotel. So, it offers a 40 square meter room with a Brisbane city skyline view. And this is located from the 9th to the 12th floors for an average night rate of $599 Australian67. >> That's so cute. Only $600 a night. That's so cute. Um, does that have like um what else? What else? Like what other like perks and do you get? Like will there be someone I can like get room service and [ __ ] or like does it like have like a bar and >> like what are we talking? >> Allow me to check that further. [sighs] So for this specific room, it doesn't have a particular inclusion in terms of um inclusion such as having access to >> but like I can call you guys and like get someone to bring up like food and drinks and stuff. Yeah. >> Yes, we have room service available at our >> Okay. Okay. Um look, do you have any um like kind of process for like if any like highprofile patrons stay there? like is there any way I can I don't know be like like escorted up or something. I just don't want to get swamped down in the reception area. That's all. >> You can always um just in case that you have preferences or request for your reservation, we can always put it on the reservation once you proceed. And if you wish to have other requests being taken note of our front desk, you can actually just redial this number. You don't have to click any of the options so that you can speak with them directly. >> Yeah. Yeah. I'd need to I'd need to confirm first if like I can get escorted up because Yeah. I can't obviously book like I I can I can get my manager to make requests, but obviously I can't stay there if my request isn't being fulfilled. So, I'd need someone to meet me in the lobby and take me up. Okay. Um, I don't want to get swamped by people and have like crowds of people following me. So, yeah, if I could get someone and maybe some security to take me up, that would be great. >> Do you recognize my voice? >> You can actually unfortunately I cannot. May I ask for your name, baby? >> Yes, it's it's I'm Matt Brown. Matt Brown. >> Matt Greg Brown. Yeah, >> I've got like 20K on Instagram. >> I see. Uh I do apologize. I haven't heard the name, but >> um >> Wow. Okay. >> You do have a lot of followers if you're mentioning. But yes, u Mr. Brown, I do understand and I do hear you with regards to your request. Now if you do wish to proceed with a reservation we can definitely proceed with that with regards to your preferred room or suite. Now with regards to your request you can actually again redial this number. You don't have to click any of the options so that you can speak directly like someone I can speak to. Do you guys do like if I did like some promotional stuff which is actually like valued at a lot more than what the room is worth. Is there someone I can speak to about maybe doing like I don't know some kind of promo and just get the rooms thrown in cuz like >> to be honest like yeah it's $600 is not really like that much money to me. Not to be rude or anything but it's really that's nearly Yeah. It's essentially free. Like I wouldn't stop if I dropped $600 out of my wallet. Do you know what I mean? >> I'm Matt Brown. >> I understand. I understand. Of course. Of course. I totally understand Mr. Brown. So yeah. Yes. Again, you can actually speak with regards to doing a promotion at our hotel on our front desk. They are well connected with regards to our other department at our hotel. >> Okay. Well, look, I'm going to have my manager call you back and just confirm all this, >> of course. >> Um, but yeah, who knows, you guys might have uh celebrities staying uh at your establishment for the next few nights. So, yeah, spread the word, make sure everyone knows about it. Um, yeah. Do you guys uh do like sex there or >> do you guys allow like sex in the rooms or >> I I do apologize. Oh, what >> do you allow like sex to happen in the rooms? >> We I wouldn't be able to guarantee that because we always um provide privacy for our guests on the room. >> Yeah. But there's no like if I were to have sex in the rooms like no one's going to like kick me out or some [ __ ] I've had hotels before do that loud. >> Well, you will have you you have your privacy in the room so we value that at our hotel. >> Okay. No, I appreciate that. Okay. So, I can have sex in the rooms. All right. Well, look, I might get my manager to call back, but yeah, maybe mention to your co-workers that um the Matt Brown is coming and yeah, I might be staying for a few nights. You lucky ducks. >> Of course. >> Of course. We look forward to your future reservation with us, Mr. Brown. >> I appreciate your time. Okay. Matt Greg Brown. >> Have a nice day. >> I understand. >> Matt Greg. >> Have a nice day, Mr. Brown. >> Matt Greg Brown. See you, baby. >> Of course. >> Right now. THANK YOU FOR DUDE. >> We have to call back as the manager and be like just fully dismiss his like [laughter] his behavior. Like he has mental health issues. You cannot let him stay at the hotel. >> Oh yeah. >> Like he's a psycho or something. >> Just want to say that guy has great customer service. Outstanding work. >> Man, he deserves a promotion. >> Stumped him with the sex. Like that was so [laughter] couldn't couldn't work out how to answer that question. All right, guys. So, we're going to call back that same place next week as the manager. Um, and >> continue that. Um, sorry, that's really cringe. And also, um, look, yeah, let's bring back the prank calls weekly. I mean, well, every episode, I mean, so look, they're back. Cringy start, but hey, that's how we >> light up the comments, guys. You got some banging ideas for prank calls. We're all ears. >> Yeah, look, that's the other thing. Like, it's hard to come up with original ideas after seven seasons. So, just let us know. Put some Give us some do get some inspiration. I see prank calls on Tik Tok all the time. [laughter] >> All right, we're going to rip into the $100 segment, but first we need to make a quick announcement. Now, our little um political rally that we're going to have at the end of the year, our um what was it again? How to get on the news thing and we're going to protest protesting that has been cancelled. >> It got denied. They obviously realized that we're just it's not like important. >> And we had some advice. We were also given some advice saying, "Look, you could really piss a lot of people off." They have to allocate actual police to this and like we just didn't want to waste people's time and potentially have this just go completely backfire on us and and piss people off. So, that's the last thing we want to do. We just want to have a laugh. So, we are canceling that. But, we have had another idea which we'll speak more about next episode, but >> better better idea. >> Better idea. We're going to be publicly screening the season finale of the podcast and we will all get to enjoy it and we're going to go out after, but we'll have more details on that next episode. But yeah, so the the protesting protest is off. So if you've booked accommodation, get your refunds now. >> I did see a few people say um why don't you just do it anyway? Um one of the you could do that, but one of the biggest things is um is >> legality. >> No, no, not just that. Michael is correct, but not just that is that the news won't come for something that the cops haven't approved. So, >> and like it's just so unpredictable. Like we might get [ __ ] 10 people show up, you know? It's so unique. >> It's going to be hot [ __ ] waving signs around in November in Brisbane. Look, the idea is cool, but the practical not so cool. >> Too risky. >> That's a great way of saying it. Michael, >> I said three calls there. >> Yeah. >> Wow. [laughter] You did too. >> My cool. >> $100 segment's coming up. We're just waiting for Kevin to get home because he'll probably clean up. Let's be honest. All right, Matt, let's do the PO box quickly and then we'll rip in. >> All right, Michael, do you want to open this one? >> Pangala. >> Is it from your hater? >> No. >> Oh, please lollies. I'm so >> Do you know what it is? >> No. >> I'm so hungry. >> That one says Martin on it. >> Yeah. And he's already ripped it open. >> Have I? >> Yep. Cuz that's what you do. >> Yeah. I can't help myself sometimes, guys. Hey, I just get so excited. >> Oh, wow. Look at this socks. >> Oh, wow. >> Hemp socks. Yes. Thank you. I love him. >> Oh, no. >> What? >> All right. We've been given a whip. This is metal wire. >> Dear Matt Brown, Marty and Michael and James. >> I know who this is. >> Me and my brother love your content so much. Every day it makes our day. We are recently signed up to your awesome website where we can see the damage. Whoever will take the whip slogging will be immensely devastated with their shockingly poor life choices. Me and my brother have done some life-changing science experiments with this whip. Use at own risk. Hope you lot enjoy this. Have fun. >> Can I have a touch of it? >> James and Jeffrey. Thank you. Please use in videos. >> Can I have a touch of it? >> Yeah, it's hard. >> Oh, yeah. It's like TV cord. >> Yeah, it's dangerous. >> All right. Now, these guys reached out uh on Instagram and said, "Can't wait to use that whip." >> Said that they were going to send a bunch of socks. I didn't realize they were hemp socks. So many. They're called M E N I E. They're from Byron Bay and they make hemp socks. And these they feel really nice. >> Does that mean no plastic in them? >> No plastic. 100% natural. >> Beautiful. >> Um no. >> Oh, Michael loves those scorpion ones. >> Like look, I'm thinking like these there. So I like them all to be honest. >> So give them a look on Instagram. Um if comfortable natural socks is your thing. Should I follow them on the >> E N I E >> Lord of the Bins. >> So, thank you Andrew and everyone at Manny for that. That's bloody great. I literally need new socks. Look at the hole in the bottom of that. [laughter] >> This is sick. >> I think I like too. >> Hi guys. Hope you are well. Thanks for all the laughs. I first saw you on Tik Tok on the pandemic and spent a lot of time laughing with my kids and now I'm a website subscriber. Thank you Anna. Thanks for the years of laughs. I made some of my favorite highlights of each of your content. I know it's a bit lame, but hey, that's me. Lots of love. Fly lie. >> Um, >> I mean, that's lovely, but sorry, it stinks here. [snorts] >> Wow. >> Matt on it. >> Be careful. Oh, >> arts and crafts. >> That's right. For James, >> Michael, picture this, right? You'll love this. >> We were both but naked. Picture picture that Anna Picture that Anna is coming second in a in a race when she was a kid and her parents are on the sideline. What are they going to yell at her? >> Go Anna. >> You got two there, Matt. One on your left, one on your right. Chuck one, brother. >> This is so cool, Anna. Thank you. >> Go grapefruit. What do these do? Are these like plates? [laughter] >> Are they rice bowls? >> We should get We should have guessed what each one said. >> What do these do again? >> What is it? Are they rice bowls? >> No, I think they're just like decoration. >> They're just like a little >> We should put them up on the podcast set. >> Yeah. Go grab >> Duffy the Gaggler. [laughter] >> Yeah. So, it's like full 2. Here comes the >> These are really good. Yeah, >> that is beautiful. >> We'll find a place for these on the wall somewhere. >> Oh, yeah. Thank you, Anna. That's so lovely, man. Her writing looks exactly like my mom's. Exactly. >> Imagine if it was your mom. >> I see. All right, >> James. So, >> here's like another legend, Joey. Joey lit up my emails about a month or two ago. >> And I want you, you can open this as I tell the story. And he lives in America. He even said if we ever come back out to Michigan, he'd love to come. Is he in Michigan? >> No, he's nearby. I think he's in Cleveland. >> Oh, sorry. Um, that might have given away some of this, but like >> Browns, >> he he's literally just gone out on his own and sorted out this for our beautiful Matt Greg Brown. This is like a beautiful >> just for you, man. We get nothing. >> The Cleveland Browns. >> Look how eager he loves a PO box. >> Such a legend, man. >> He feels This is Matt's version of feeling like a rockar. [laughter] No, >> I just like I just like to communicate with >> hurry up instead of partying and >> Matt loves to open brown gifts. >> Oh, wow. There is some things for others. >> That is Cleveland Browns. He's put Matt Brown on there. >> Wow. >> Maybe you could share that, Matt. >> What would you like? >> I want I want something at least. Give me the box at least. >> Hang on a sec. There's lots here. >> Oh, wow. >> This is unfair. [laughter] >> Oh, thank you. All right. Uber W. Mason. So, you got me a truck. >> An Indian truck. Play with that. You can play with it. You should show it to the camera, Matt. >> Play with that tonight. >> It's not just for you. You should show everyone. >> Look how jealous Michael is. >> Read the letter, Carl. >> To Marty Michael James and the Brown. What's up, legends? My name is Joe and I'm from Cleveland, Ohio. That's where LeBron James from. >> That's right, mate. >> Longtime fan and subscriber of all your of all of your guys videos and podcasts. I've heard on a few podcasts about you guys talking about Matt getting more Browns football merch. So, I figured let's get him something nice for once instead of just hate mail. Although, to be honest, I almost made the name on the back. No, [laughter] but we'll give him the benefit of the doubt. Maybe this is the gift he needs to unlock the beast. Just to be clear, the Browns are definitely not the best NFL team to share a name with. >> Yeah, they [ __ ] >> The Cleveland Browns >> coming from a season ticket hold. Uh, but just like Matt participating challenges, most times you just got to watch for the effort, not for the wins. [laughter] I also threw some other Cleveland sports you to do with what you will. If you guys are ever in the States again, uh, think about doing a fan meet up. That would be [ __ ] awesome. I appreciate all you guys making hilarious videos. Joe from Manura. Man, Michael, congrats on your baby. He or she will grow up with a great dad and some kickass uncles. [snorts] >> Thank you, Joe. We haven't decided on the gender yet, so >> [laughter] >> just >> thank you Joe. Um, >> what is this? >> Oh wow. Oh wow. It's not all wow. It's something different to that. See, it's a shirt. >> Oh dude, that's hectic. >> Should have said that. Not all wow. What's that even mean? >> Holy sh That's pretty cool. >> It's cool. >> 69. [laughter] >> Good. 69. >> Holy [ __ ] That is epic. Look, even though it's not based around me, >> I still respect it. This is why we have the best viewers. I don't like to call you fans because you're more family, >> but we have the best viewers in the world. >> Put it on, Brown. >> I was thinking I'm going to wear a neck. >> The thought goes into it. >> They're quite expensive, too. I mean, >> yeah, dude. >> Joe, this is um this is a lot. >> So, we'll get we'll get Matty Brown. He will bloody as as a little thank you, we're going to send you some merch, my boy. We're gonna send you some cool. >> Yeah, dude. That's mad. >> Wow. It's even got Nike. >> Yeah. Yeah, it does. >> And Matt loves it, too, cuz it's still quite tight around the arm, showing off the guns. >> That's um That's amazing. Thank you. >> That's a sick present. [laughter] >> That's why I wanted to do the PO box so badly. [laughter] >> Well, no. James James didn't say anything. I didn't even know that was coming. >> Yeah. >> Oh, wow. It was a touching moment. This is the best thing that's ever happened. >> Who is he? I need to >> You don't get any socks. Give your socks back if you have any. >> I'm keeping Lord of the Bins. >> I'll send you his email. >> Yeah, >> this is the best thing that ever happened to [clears throat] Look how This is like the best. >> I don't blame him. I knew it was going to be sick in a life full of just losses. This is a huge win. >> New hat, new shirt, >> new socks, >> new man. >> Just got to get some new shoes. >> Anyway, thank you so much, guys. We really appreciate all the stuff you sent in. It's probably not much fun watching us unwrap gifts, but anyway. So, if you want to send us some stuff, it's PO Box 256 Tagum 4018. >> Josh, we'll put something on the screen now. >> Oh, wow. >> We did last. We did that last episode. [ __ ] >> Maybe just while I say it. Have a go. Saves time. Saves time. >> Right. We'll put it on now. >> Just not understanding, is he? >> Delay. >> All right, guys. We're going to have a massive, massive bong. And we're going to be right back with a $100 segment where we get our team to do >> cash. Keep drinking. Kev's drinking. [bell] >> All right, we are back. We have the boys. They will not be miked. They're not allowed to talk. All they do is write. >> Yeah. So, we're going to we're going to do it. They're going to they're going to uh bid and then you'll see them doing the thing that they bidded for and then we go to the next one. So, now just a quick reminder. This is whoever votes bids the lowest amount of money gets to do the thing for the money. All right. So, just a reminder and just for a reminder for you at home. All right. Number one. And I think >> Oh, jingle for it. >> Do you want a h 100red bucks or 50 bucks? 100 bucks. That's 50 bucks. >> If that was last night, I would have eaten that cuz that's 50 bucks. >> All right. So, >> Jesus [laughter] numbs. There's a hidden reference to that. >> All right. Number one, rub deep heat on your balls. Now, editors, you may have remembered me and Michael have done these. You might have edited and seen how the effects >> screaming in the pool. >> Now remember, you don't have to participate in the bidding. You can just put a stroke and then you're out. You don't have to do it. >> And I must have eyes on balls to see him. >> No, that's not true. >> It's extra strength, too. That's all we've got. >> Yeah, it is. >> Yeah. Is that true? >> That's my promise you. I swear I'm [laughter] >> It's not normal DP. It is extra strength. DP [laughter] >> straight away. writing something. >> $450. [laughter] >> All right, boys. Reveal on three. Three. One, two, three. >> 8597. [screaming] >> Kev Kev is going to make some money. >> He can't believe he won that one. I don't think he wanted to win it. >> Congratulations, Kevin. You're going to be in excru excruciating pain for 15 minutes. >> More than that. We had the pool. We were We had the pool to go in. It's gonna be an hour. >> Kev, you don't realize how bad this is. >> We gave this a nine out of 10. >> Hey, you can go in the damn damn you. >> Yeah, you can go in the damn. >> There's a $100 here cuz we [laughter] don't have 85. So, you get more if you can do this. >> Well, he doesn't have a choice. [laughter] It's on his balls. That's it. Just cuz the tip of your fingers. If it goes all over your hands, you won't be able to help. [laughter] Just a little early to teach him. >> Now you're watching him put cream on his turning away. >> [ __ ] >> Don't get any dick. >> I'm not. >> I saw his dick. >> [ __ ] view. >> You're now ow me 50 bucks. >> Isn't it 100? >> No. That's what Kev charges. >> See his [laughter] dick. >> Is it on there? Yeah, it's on there. I can feel it here. >> You got to rub it in. >> You put on there. >> I just started to sting now. [laughter] >> Dude, give it another minute and it's going to be >> it's already pretty much all of that. [laughter] >> Stay Kevin. >> Hi. My voice hurts. I know. >> Yeah. Yeah. That's enough. >> All right. I can't believe that >> still walks. He's walking slightly faster than he normally does. >> Probably about three times as fast as what he usually. >> Oh, Jesus. [laughter] >> It's so fun. Lots of people. run camp. >> Straight into Marty's car. >> All right. Number two. You want to read it out? >> Yeah. I'll have a position. >> Oh, we're all reading one. >> Yeah, that's right. >> Enough. >> All right. Eat a raw egg hole. Now, this is with the shell >> like Tommy. >> And you can't just bite into it and then the egg falls out. You've got to make sure it goes in and the whole thing is consumed or you don't get a buck. >> NO WASTE. DON'T GET A BUCK. RYAN >> MARCO. >> SORRY. Kev's confident. Look at him. >> Do you have to eat it? >> As long as you want. >> Quite a while. >> Don't you drop any, Ryan. >> But it You have to pop the whole thing. >> Yeah. You can't You can't kind of take bites of it >> and it can't just go bite and then pops out. I want it all stay in consume. Be >> Yeah. Pop it cuz you can't >> That changes things cuz I >> Yeah. >> Yeah. Yeah. I know. >> Look, you can have You can have a cup that goes in and then you continue on. No. >> Well, I reckon that's fair cuz that's going to be hard once it's been in your mouth. But you can't really take a bite of it cuz then it'll you'll drop it. You got to just pop it in and go for it. >> All right, reveal on three. >> One, two, three, GO. [laughter] >> Put [laughter] $35. >> Ryan can't believe he put 35. >> That's less than 50 bucks. >> That is [ __ ] nothing [laughter] in today's economy. That's like [ __ ] $2 in the '90s. Imagine if you swallowed a hole maybe. >> If you do spill, spill on the table, please. >> You do. You must >> on the floor. NOT ON THE >> Not on the Please don't spill on the floor. >> Think about it, Kev. If you >> If you spit it out, you're just going to have to do it again and again and again. Just get it done the first time. >> Yeah. And Jen, bucket is last resort. >> Or you can quit and then there's just no money. >> Yeah, but you have to give it a crack. >> That's what I would do. Oh, that's going to make me vomit. >> Come on in there. >> Don't [laughter] over the [ __ ] >> I mean over the bucket, please, buddy. You got it. >> Come on. >> Slippery debris. Yeah. [laughter] >> Pour it into his mouth. >> No. All right, we'll get him another egg. >> Oh, I can taste the moment in my throat. >> Oh, >> do you want another egg or do you want to forfeit? >> I'll forfeit. [laughter] >> What the hell? >> All right, Ryan, it's up to you if you want. >> You can do it if you want the 40 bucks. >> No, I'd have the exact same reaction as Kev. >> How much? 40? >> Yeah, 40. >> I'll give it a go. >> Wait, can I bite the top, drink it, and then eat the shell? >> As long you can eat it any way you like. As long as you don't spill any. Okay. I reckon I'll plug the whole thing. >> Yeah, it is the safest cuz it kind of explodes. >> If you do, you got to have it this way cuz it will fly out. >> Yeah, it'll drip down immediately. >> If you just plug it in and out, then that's it. >> Yeah, that's it. >> Come on. [laughter] >> The shell adds a nice crunch to the slime. His focus is >> he's got a morning buzz from that beer. [laughter] >> This is cocoon parties. This is him on the weekend [laughter] standing over a bucket. [laughter] He's in focus. Very cool. >> Could be [ __ ] >> Wow. [applause] Well done. All right, the next one is do a shoey out of the most shoe we can find at the whole property. >> And it's milk. >> Milk or beer? >> Got an ice cold beer downstairs in the fridge, boys. Han. Han. Super light. >> All right, boys. Reveal in one, two, three. 50. [screaming] >> Coup's got it. Holy [ __ ] He's not happy about it, but he's >> That's more than 50 bucks. >> That's right, mate. >> Well done. Beer. >> Oh, man. All right, last one. That's outstanding. >> Oh, it's covered in blood. Is it that bad? >> No, I'm good, man. >> Yeah, I think I'm good, too. All right. For 65 bucks, C is going to do a [ __ ] straight in. >> Didn't even on the job. >> You have cleaned it, but it's like knocked all the dust out. >> It feels nice. It's not tempting anymore. Do it side on. Do it side on. We want to see >> like that. >> That's it, brother. >> Down. work [laughter] >> spillage must be cold. >> Are you jealous? Jealous. [laughter] >> Is that good enough, >> my man? >> Well done, >> my man. >> At the bottom, but that's good enough. 65. Well done. God damn. >> On to the next. >> This is great. >> This is now I love this. It's nice not having to do and just watch. >> Fair enough. >> All right. Number four. Wear a chicken necklace for two full days. >> Now, chicken necks. >> Yeah, it's a chicken neck necklace. So, you'll have you'll be wearing multiple chicken necks on a piece of string. raw chicken >> like resting on your shirt for two full work days. >> We'll have it for you here. You can leave it here. And if you want to put it in the fridge, that's acceptable. But throughout the day, it will melt flesh flesh into your clothes and skin. >> Yeah. And whoever's going to like if Ryan gets it, you're going to hate it too, Cooper. But if Cooper gets it, you're going to hate it, Ryan, cuz you sit next to each other. >> Keep working outside and it will probably make you somehow smell better. >> It probably look good. [laughter] All right, let's reveal in one, two, three. [screaming] >> Cooper's getting paid. >> Wow. Looks >> Oh, wow. >> That's impressive. Well done, boys. >> So, starting tomorrow, I guess we >> Did you want to give Ryan like a handshake or something just to say thank you for participating? >> I'll give him a verbal nod. H. >> Oh, it actually was verbal. It was [laughter] good. >> You weren't even watching. That was your reward for playing but not winning anything. >> Have a smell of it, >> dude. It's the worst smelling thing I've ever smelled. >> That is It's not meant to look like that, [laughter] [laughter] >> dude. I wonder what this >> How much is the necklace? This has [laughter] >> 35. >> All right, C, you ready? >> So, two days. Coupe has to wear this now. >> Dude, that's it's going to stink out the whole office. >> I think you'll get used to it, though. Just be careful not to get it on your hands and mouth. I guess >> it's not worse when you first open the box. >> Yeah, it's cuz there was like 50 of them. Ryan's going to Oh, I can smell it now. I can still smell it through this. >> Sorry, boys. >> Thank you very much, lads. [snorts] Uh, thank you for participating. [applause] Let us know in the comments. Um, if you like this segment and if you'd like us to continue and if you have any suggestions for what the boys can bid on. >> Absolutely. Fire up the comments with them as well. >> All right. Look, >> well done, boys. Kevin just asked what's deep. [laughter] >> Kevin as he's walking off has just asked what's deep heat. >> Surely he's not being serious. >> He's like 18. >> He might Is that child abuse? >> Uh really not. >> He's a He's a consenting adult. He can do as he pleases. >> All right. [sighs] Outstanding. All right, guys. Let's rip into some Tinders. Eh, >> this place stinks, dude. Yeah, it's it it's actually I feel like it's coming up and then coming back in your face cuz I'm not getting too much of it. >> It's really unpleasant. Can you play the jingle? My brown. >> Oh, yay. Tinder. >> Time to relax, my boys. >> Yeah, I might even >> souls are my shoes in the camera. >> Fair enough. >> Is that good, Josh? >> Perfect. >> Sad and lonely women on an app. >> This is heaven. >> Tinder's there for our laughs. baby sex. If we're staffed, only cows can be calves. >> And this is a segment where we use Matt's identity to go on Tinder adventures >> and that's crazy. >> He's been shown in female groups to be misogynist. >> We have destroyed his reputation and his image and his life for your entertainment. So, please take a moment to give us a fivestar review and a like on this video. And God, maybe a comment, too. [laughter] >> For sure now, I must be on a list of some kind. >> And for sure now, people would would just be like, >> well, you would have been on a list from all your behavior in your early 20s. >> That's a different list. >> So, look, here we go. >> Enough. >> Um, what was I going to say? Oh, yeah. By the way, next week we're we're bringing back the partner challenge. >> We have to hide a speaker in the like roof of our houses >> and we're going to play like some like some kind of like ratis noises and we're going to secretly film our partners. So stay tuned for that next episode. All right, we're with our partners. >> I'm going to be doing it editors and Josh is going to be on my side with it. So >> you should you should tell the other editors what Matt's going to do and just ruin it for him. [ __ ] the whole thing up. >> Yeah, you could do that. But then >> that's an easy day for me. >> I want to see Ryan frightened. >> That's an easy day for me if you were on it. >> Sorry. Think quick. >> All right. Matt starts a conversation. >> It's not me. [sighs] I'm curling my back and looking over my shoulder. I'm sexy. >> I grind my hips forwards and backwards, letting foam pull in my nappy. Hey there, I'm Matt Brown. Google me unmad. >> Oh >> yeah, that is as bad as it gets, >> man. I didn't even think that was real life. >> It's okay if they Google me because they're going to get Matt Brown UFC fighter >> or the Matt Brown guy that died. The Alaskan guy. [snorts] >> Phillip. >> Next one. Here we go. [laughter] [laughter] >> Philip Brown. >> Phillip is >> All right. All right. [clears throat] So, Matt starts a conversation. [snorts] Warm milk trickles down my glands. You've captured my attention and soon my seed. You deserve me. Let me give myself to you. Unmatched. [laughter] All right. Matt starts [snorts] a conversation. [clears throat] Okay. Wow. Is it my chicken? Cuz I get that a lot. So, just for context, she's got a picture of a chicken in her pictures >> with her in it. Or just a chicken. her like pet chicken. >> But is it just the chicken in the photo? >> Her legs and a chicken. >> Are they nice legs? >> Yes. >> Pause. They're >> all legs and nice legs, mate. As long as they bloody work. >> All right. And just for [laughter] just for more context, Matt claims to have a pet turtle in his bio. [clears throat] Your chicken and my turtle. We could make a porno with them. Like fully get them to have intercourse. That's hilarious. I don't know. She might peck him a bit. Yeah, we can just say that's kissing. My turtle is so chill. My mate took a [ __ ] on his shell once during a bender and he had it on there for like 3 days. How old is your chicken and is it just for pet? I'm not 100% sure on the age as I got her as a rehome and definitely a pet. That's so crazy. Does she do any tricks? My turtle is 12 years old and I have taught him to go into his shell completely on command. She sits and comes when called, but that's about it. She's super friendly though. That's so funny. Does she lay eggs? And wouldn't she everywhere? My turtle does little truffles, I call them. They look and smell like truffles. [laughter] >> No, she's pretty good inside. She'll hold on for outside. She might have an accident, but not very often. House train. That's so cool. I find little truffles crusted into my carpet. Whenever I let my turtle roam, hard, crispy outer layer that gives way to a soft, gooey truffle center. When I pick them up, I just end up smearing. Ew. Chicken smells and is like poo and we together it's gross. I get long thin truffles with a carpet fur embedded deeply throughout. They harden quickly and are very slippery when stepped on. It smells like with streaks of blood throughout. Like a metallic copper theme to it. I really need to get rid of my carpet. Yeah, you do. So hard having carpet with pets. It's a rental and there's little truffle stains all over it. [laughter] I can see probably like 30 smears. I've got an inspection soon, too. Oh, [ __ ] The carpet crunches like dry leaves when I walk on the truffle skids. [laughter] Sulfur fills my lungs as I find truffle marks on my hands. I feel sick again and cher. I think maybe the truffles are starting to weaken my system. [laughter] They definitely would be that bad for you. I look in the mirror and see streaks of truffle across my foreheads. How? I must have forgotten it was on my hands again. Truffle stains cover my pillow. And that is an ongoing conversation. >> It's not. It's over. You could literally hear the exact moment when she decided, I don't want to do this anymore, but I'll continue it cuz I'm polite, man. She's out. Your vocabulary is so It's like for you to be English, your second language is just crazy. That's right. >> Crunchy carpets. >> Truffles. The way you say truffles is offensively weird. >> Do you know what that is? >> Chocolate. [laughter] What >> truffles is mushroom fungus? >> Oh, you're thinking of chocolate truffles. >> All right, Matt starts this conversation. [clears throat] There's another longer one. >> Well, well, well. Three big holes in the ground and a few on you as well. [laughter] >> That's an assumption. I'm in Tazzay at the moment. Are you in Brisbane? Yeah, I live in Brisbane. What you doing in Tazzay? Oysters everywhere in the mud. Put them in a bag. [laughter] I live in the Hunter Valley in New South Wales, but I travel a lot because I want to. Do you travel for fun? I travel a bit, too. I've been to Cans before, and I went to Toumbra in 2022. [laughter] I travel for work, but mostly for fun. What did you enjoy in Cans? I did some pub crawls, started the Backpackers, and they took us around to get all these to all these bars and pubs, and we got really cheap drinks. Two for one special. So, I got blind every night for less than $100. So many young people though, they kept bullying me. [laughter] Yeah, damn those young people. I enjoyed the aquarium and the barrier reef. Barrier Reef. Yeah, one of the pub crawls started at the aquarium and I saw heaps of photos of the barrier reef, but I didn't have time to go. Some of the pub crawls started at like lunchtime and went until like 3:00 a.m., so it was hard to do much else. Okay, cool. Sounds like we aren't a good match. Oh, [laughter] I'm sorry to hear that. Can I ask why you think that? Alcohol isn't a big part of my life and isn't something I'm looking for in a partner short or long term. Prioritizing drinking over the Great Bay Area Reef seems crazy to me. [laughter] >> Oh, okay. >> It was just because I was on on my own and I was trying to find a partner. I'm 40 years old and I've been getting worried, so having some drinks and putting myself out there seemed like an obvious choice. Okay, so you're not normally a big drinker? Depends what you mean by big drinker. more than once or twice a week and not getting drunk every week. Well, what about one massive night of Fortnite? Like 20 to 30 standard drinks and then nothing for the next two weeks. My dad is an alcoholic, so I'm mindful to I don't want that kind of life for myself. That's not to say I don't enjoy a drink or getting a bit pissy, but it's very rare. Yeah. No, that's too much for me. But it's less than once or twice a week. But it's 20 to 30 standard drinks. [laughter] Why do you want to drink that much? What does it give you that that you don't otherwise have to drink that much? No judgment. I'm just asking. It's just so fun. Fully going for it and just deleting beer after beer, taking away all of life's stresses and worries and just entering black. [laughter] It's the most fun and enjoyable experience. It's so unpredictable, too. Anything can [laughter] happen. And if you aren't passing judgment, then please just try it with me once. Black out with me. [laughter] Not passing judgment doesn't mean participating. It means listening. I live my life in a way that doesn't need extreme escape es escapism. But that's okay. I wish you all the best. If you would just open your heart once and just please see what I mean. Please. I'm begging you to black out with me. Just one time and you'll see. Goodbye, man. [laughter] >> Dude, that was beautiful. >> That was a story. It was like the notebook, too. >> It was a tragedy. >> Yeah. >> Yeah. Yeah, >> she could have been the one, but they just couldn't find >> Yeah, they both didn't want dementia. Just one wanted dementia. >> All right, I call >> It's so funny, too, cuz it's opposite to that. >> Yeah, unless he has a wine challenge. >> That's right. >> All right, I call this one prostitute. >> I think this can't be good. >> Oh, yes. [snorts] >> Hi. How are you? Hey, B. I'm good, thanks. Yourself? I'm biting my bottom lip. You're really altering my biology. Uh, thanks. I can feel my heart beating and my senses are heightened. Real freaky. Tell me about yourself. What do I need to know first? That a physical connection is not the only thing I'm looking for. After that, I'm an open book, employed, active, range of hobbies, but plenty of free time to add someone to my life. It might seem like physical connection is my main driving force, but I just feel electricity surging through my body when I look at you. It's a chemistry thing. We have lots of sexual chemistry. What do you value in a man? >> I value honesty, loyalty, masculinity without toxicity. Someone who understands what a listening ear is needed more than a solution sometimes. Someone who blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah. [laughter] >> So, you want a manly man, but a man who's feminine when it suits you. Masculinity without toxicity is having your cake and eating it, too. Masculinity isn't something you can pick and choose traits from. Us men, we protect, we provide, we're honest and loyal. We'll fix and carry burdens, but we still need freedom to be toxic. What is something about masculinity that is toxic in your opinion? You need freedom to be toxic? What a red flag. Toxic men are looking to control, are aggressive, and don't value women. You can still have a masculine personality by wanting to provide, protect, and look for solutions without toxicity. It's a man's understanding the fine line and not crossing it. Not freedom to be toxic, but freedom to be a man. I agree that aggression and control is not right. But letting the man lead and trusting him to his feminine, just like how prostitutes get paid for sex, men want that occasionally. It's science. [laughter] Men wants to be paid for sex. If you agree that aggression and control are not right, then it's quite possible our definitions of masculinity aren't that far apart, just maybe not articulated as clearly as each other. I want a man who can lead without completely devaluing my input and opinions, blah blah blah blah. Mhm. >> No, I'm saying men want to pay for sex. [laughter] That's true masculinity. For example, I dated a woman and we would and would happily pay her for sex. We would meet up once a fortnight and she would track the time we spent together and charge me an hourly rate with her. She explained that that's what masculinity is and I understood what she was saying and agreed. But yes, [laughter] I agree. It sounds like our definitions aren't far off. Right. Well, I would not want my partner off paying other women for sex. Nor would I want that for myself. Paying for certain things within the relationship as discussed, then sure, but not straight up paying for sex. [snorts] Saying no to paying for sex with other women is a fair boundary, but I would really prefer to pay my partner for sex within the relationship. [laughter] So, if we did, and obviously this is just a hypothetical. I know you wouldn't want to have sex with me right now, but if we did have sex, I would want to pay you between $200 to $300 depending on what we did. Why do you feel the need to pay the person you're in a relationship? Ultimately, someone I assume you're in love with. Yes, I know it's not a traditional viewpoint, but I would really love to pay you to have sex with me, especially if we were in love in a relationship. I want to pay you. Every time you had sex with that person in a relationship, I'd expect to be with in to be a minimum of few of a few times a week. You really want to throw away up to $1,000 at someone? Yes, I'm dead serious. I would expect some pretty freaky stuff for that amount of money, but essentially that's what I want. I want to keep the physical aspect alive. It would keep the physical aspect alive like you wouldn't believe. So, what do you say? Want to make a quick $500? I'm not agreeing to sleep with you just yet, but you've got me intrigued as to you as a person. I appreciate you being so open-minded about this. It says a lot about you as a person to let me communicate. So, thank you. I'm open-minded for now. are generally tight and be that way, but I have limits just like everyone else. I really am not looking for just a physical connection, even if it even if I was being paid. [snorts] Is this the part where you tell me this was some kind of test and I've been messing with me, seeing how far you can push me? That's totally valid. I don't want to make you uncomfortable, but I think it's valuable to step outside your comfort zone in a controlled paid way. [laughter] Aren't aren't all conversations on Tinder a test? A test in compatibility and whether we should continue to get to know each other. >> We'll see if my comfort zone can be pushed. Yes, they're all a test, but in much more low-key way. Work, hobbies, communication style, and potential intervention intentions. I think you'll be surprised at how much more exciting it is when you're getting paid. [laughter] Maybe maybe how much of a prostitute I feel like. grope. [laughter] I our interactions outside that agreement are going to be incredibly important. I understand. I have a meeting in 10 minutes, but I would like to keep talking to you. >> You you know how to find me. I do. And that is an ongoing conversation. >> Unbelievable to be that weird. And you even said that you're like you want toxicity and then she's come around even though that's against her values. And then she's like into now she wants to be paid. She wants to you. So you can go on Tinder, that conversation is there. I'll show you her name and you can pay her for sex. >> You have turned her into a prostitute, right? >> That like that was very manipulative. >> Yeah, there was some [laughter] heavy heavy gaslighting going on. >> It's Yeah, I >> I've I've noticed your gaslighting manipulator. [laughter] >> It's Yeah, like look, it's not right, but it's slightly not wrong. >> I've convinced her that being paid to have sex is acceptable for [laughter] you, >> dude. You're too smart for your own good sometimes, man. >> That's insane. [laughter] That's like the German in you. There's that evil manipulation. >> You hear that one moment where she was like, >> "Oh, she literally just like was like, "Oh, okay, cool. Okay, I could I could get around this like how your values align and shit." Is that [laughter] >> Yeah. >> Oh man, that was >> But I look, I was standing. >> Please, let's follow that one up next week. >> Yeah. Yeah. I'll uh I'll message her today unless you want to take over. Well, can I use the uh >> the uh business card? >> The business card? [laughter] >> Yep. >> No, we know we need to continue this. >> We need to continue this for the fans. >> I'll organize her to come over for a meet up. >> I'd love to see if you could slowly and and gently work your way to what she would be happy to do for a certain amount of time. >> Yeah, that's good. I'll get specifics. >> Like a poo on your knee. Yeah, [laughter] >> you have to start you got to start less slightly less weird. >> Snort my >> or like even like you have to land the poo on my kneecap. If it lands, it's a grand. If it doesn't, I'll give you 500. [laughter] >> 500 for try. >> Yeah. >> All right, guys. Oh, the athletics. Holy [ __ ] You're right. Oh, yeah. Let's quickly go and have the discus competition between the Brown and Michael. All right. Look, sports jersey. He's ready. >> He's [ __ ] >> He's ready. the highest chance you've ever had. >> We have our discus range here. And remember, they're not allowed to step over at all. Even after they've released, you can't step over. That's a foul. They're going to have three [music] throws each. Furthest wins. And front foot must be behind the spray paint. So, that is the perfect positioning. That >> [ __ ] foul. >> All right. >> He's only scissors, paper, rock to see who goes first, boys. >> You're going to get >> Oh, wait. Michael won last week. I think I think Michael should go first. I think that's only fair. >> Up to you. I can do either. Whatever. Whatever way you want. >> All right. Look, Michael's first. >> You're not going to hit me, are you? >> He might He might miss throw. Here we go. Three. >> Three. Two. One. Foul. [laughter] >> I'm warming up. Figuring it out. Lucky I might HAVE HIT YOU. >> [ __ ] [laughter] HEY, it was a foul, but it was pretty decent distance. I will say that, brother. >> I'll give it to you, too, mate. >> See, I'm just sucking you out. I'm giving you false hope, >> dude. >> Matt's done this before. >> Explosive brown, [laughter] >> dude. What the hell just happened? >> I misstepped in my spin and then I had to control myself. So, >> it was actually my weakest throw I've probably ever gotten in my life. >> Dude, he's good at that. 19 21 22 23 24 25 26 and 1/2. That's a world record. 26 is [laughter] the world record. >> A branch record. >> It would be for women, >> dude. Look how far that went. >> I don't even know how to >> That's a branch record. That's a branch record. >> Go away. >> I'm going to try your spin. You're [ __ ] Michael. >> [ __ ] this. You can't afford to [ __ ] this, Alan. >> One, two. >> Oh. Oh. OH. [screaming] Michael's taking the lead. >> All right. It's not so hard. >> It's not so hard. >> It's It's >> I've won. I'm better THAN YOU. 28 1/2 M. New world record. >> I've won. >> That was straight. You just broke the women's world record probably. >> I spun. >> Heads. Heads. >> Heads. >> [ __ ] >> I could beat you guys if I wanted. >> FAIR. >> OH, DIDN'T QUITE have the distance. >> Not bad, though. I've won. I can't believe I've won. >> Actually, I can. >> He's confident now. got his tail up. >> Fair throw. >> No, rubbish. Foul. >> Pressure is on the ground. >> The last can rip it. >> The last throw I went with power. And if you notice, the discus was like that. Want us to do like >> No, no, that's high jump. >> Oh, here we go. Brownie [ __ ] rip it. >> Explode. >> A [ __ ] I knew it. Anyway, whatever. Let's get back to the podcast and fix this [music] f SOME SICK BULL. I'M BETTER. I'M BETTER. >> OKAY, so no surprises there. Michael won. Um, [laughter] >> even he's far more petite than the Brown. And this was the Brown's best chance. There will be another competition next week. It's going to be wrestling on the knees. >> Athletic has to be Olympic. >> Wrestling. Wrestling. >> Athletic, isn't it? >> Athletic. [snorts] Paralytic. >> Good point, Michael. You'll be paralytic anyway after working out after wrestling. >> What do you decide? No, it's athletics. What do you decide? >> I'll do any sport. >> Short form sprint cycle. >> What about javelin? >> Javelin. >> Michael wins that. His throwing is better. >> But um yeah, >> short put. >> If we keep it to athletics, we won't be able to >> short put next week as well as partner challenges. Thank you guys for watching and we'll see you guys in a couple of weeks. >> Don't you start singing. >> Go on, mate. B E S with a B E S with a B E S TB. That spells best. B S with a B E S with a B E S TB. Hey. B E S B E S B E S TB. Hey, hungry. Oh.