Tom Bilyeu's Rules For Getting The Most Out of Your Day | Impact Theory Q&A
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In this episode of Impact Theory, Tom Bilyeu addresses how to maximize daily efficiency through habits and routines while answering viewer questions about building sustainable work practices. He emphasizes that success requires constructing a life built on specific rules rather than relying solely on willpower. For instance, regarding side businesses or new roles where productivity is difficult to maintain, he advises viewers to establish hard-and-fast "bright lines," such as getting out of bed within ten minutes regardless of circumstances. Bilyeu suggests allocating dedicated time blocks for work and scoring oneself daily based on accountability metrics like focus and flow. He argues that desire is a process that must be cultivated; if one lacks excitement, they should identify their core "why" or connect the task to an identity statement, such as viewing themselves as someone who naturally works hard until others assume it comes from talent. The discussion extends to physical disciplines like cold exposure and managing fatigue through biological optimization. When asked about his cold shower routine, Bilyeu reveals that while he once endured daily showers for fifteen months using a difficult method of starting dry before submerging in freezing water, he eventually found the practice mentally draining rather than empowering. He now prefers full-body cold water submersion in an unheated pool at 58 degrees Fahrenheit to stimulate cellular energy and confidence without ruining his shower rhythm or delaying warming up for forty-five minutes. For viewers struggling with low motivation due to exhaustion, such as a teacher working on a business after school hours, Bilyeu stresses the importance of "cellular energy" derived from proper sleep, diet, exercise, and intermittent fasting. He notes that fatigue makes people cowards and recommends waking without an alarm by going to bed early enough to ensure restorative sleep, which is essential for maintaining high performance over time. A significant portion of the Q&A focuses on overcoming shame and inertia in personal struggles like weight loss or career dissatisfaction. Bilyeu challenges viewers who feel ashamed of their current situation, noting that biology often works against them; fat acts as an organ secreting hormones to maintain storage, while a stressed microbiome encourages overeating processed foods. He points out that trauma, such as losing a parent at age fifteen and experiencing homelessness, creates high-stress environments that exacerbate these biological hurdles. Rather than dwelling on the difficulty or blaming past events, he urges individuals to shift their focus from moving away from what they hate toward something exciting they desire. By attaching goals to specific people one loves—such as fighting for a mother's health against metabolic disease—or by focusing purely on looking good in skinny jeans, viewers can generate the necessary enthusiasm to push through biological resistance and rejection. Ultimately, Bilyeu concludes that while individual circumstances vary regarding genetics and trauma, everyone possesses the agency to make different choices at any moment. The path to an ideal life involves a combination of setting rigid rules, cultivating deep excitement for one's goals, aligning actions with identity statements, and optimizing biological function through diet and sleep. He warns against rationalizing excuses or staying in a chronic state of fatigue but encourages viewers to embrace the discomfort required for growth. Whether it is building a billion-dollar business without an alarm clock or losing weight despite stacked odds, the core message remains that consistency comes from working the process repeatedly until actions become second nature. By focusing on what truly matters and refusing to be defined by limitations, individuals can transform their habits into legendary routines that unlock their full potential.
Read the full video transcript
[music]
Hey everybody, welcome to a very special
episode of Impact Theory. Today we are
going to be talking all about habits and
routines and how to get the absolute
most out of every moment of your time
because I promise if you want to
succeed, you've got to get deeply
efficient. And that's where habits and
routines come in. And I'm going to be
taking your questions. So hopefully you
guys have some really good ones and we
can talk about exactly what you need to
do to hit the goals you want to hit. All
right, without further ado, let's hear
the first question.
Hi, Tom. I'm Danielle. I'm from sunny
Orlando, Florida, and I'm a sales
professional with a side hustle. My
question for you is about side business
personal working habits. My husband and
I are growing a side business that we
have apart from our professional
careers, and I've recently taken on a
new role writing blogs about specific
topics that the company is all about. My
husband already has his personal working
habits in place since he's been working
on the business for years. I however am
finding it hard to work this new role
into my current daily habits and
routine. Not because I don't enjoy
working on the business, it's just hard
for me to get started and stay
productive. So, what advice do you have
for me when it comes to getting started
and building personal working habits
that will last and ultimately change my
life?
All right. So, the thing that I love is
that you're using the word build because
that's exactly what we're going to be
doing here. You're going to construct
what you want your life to be. You're
going to break it up into different
hours and segments so you know when it's
go time. And then you're going to build
rules into your life that mandate that
you show up during those times. So I
have a whole host of rules in my life.
Uh they can be small simple rules like I
get out of bed in 10 minutes or less. Uh
they can be more profound and impactful
goals or excuse me rules. And I have a
rule in my life where Monday through
Friday if I'm awake I'm either working
or working out. So if I were doing
something like you in this situation, I
would say okay these two day two two
hours or five hours however much time it
is that you want to allocate to the
business you're going to say I am
working on the business during these
times I'm going to tell myself I'm going
to tell other people. That way there's
accountability. Then I'm going to score
myself at the end of that session. Did I
show up? Did I start when I said I was
going to start? Did I go hard the whole
time? And I'm just going to give myself
a rating every day depending on where
I'm going, how I did that day. Was I
distracted? Did I have flow? Was it a
great day, a bad day? And by doing that,
I'm going to hold myself accountable so
I can see over time, did I show up when
I said I was going to show up? What was
the score that I gave myself for staying
focused, staying on task, and getting
things done? And then the third thing to
really make this stick, you've got to
find a way to be excited about what
you're doing. And oftentimes when people
come and they say that they're having
trouble making a new habit stick, the
reality is they just don't want it badly
enough. And when you realize that that's
not an indictment on you as a person,
that's a simple statement about the fact
that desire is a process. So you don't
there's very few things in your life
that you just sort of automatically are
excited about. Most of the things if you
really want to kick ass at something,
you've got to build a ton of energy into
getting excited about that thing. Now,
that comes in a couple different forms.
Number one is your why. Why are you
doing this? So, it might be, hey, my
husband and I were really excited about
this. This is going to be our path to
freedom and building something with him.
Like, this means everything to me. And I
couldn't be more excited, more honored
to be working side by side with my
husband to build something, to show each
other what we're capable of, to take
care of each other, to, you know, give
ourselves what we need to build a
family, whatever. You're going to make
that why. You're going to say it. You're
going to say it with enthusiasm. It's
what I call embodying what you want to
feel. So, if you want to be excited when
you're telling other people, when you're
even talking to yourself, when you're
talking to your husband, you're actually
going to let yourself get hyped up.
There's a mechanism in the brain that
says, "Whoa, hey, we're all hyped up
about this. It must actually be worth
being hyped up about, and it becomes a
self-reinforcing loop. So, we've got our
why." And then we want to make sure that
we're putting the identity into it that
we want to get out. So, if we want to be
the kind of person that shows up and
works hard, then we say, "I'm the type
of person that shows up and works hard."
And you're going to lean into that and
the why that you have with your husband.
You guys are building something. You're
excited about it. You're telling other
people. You're embodying it. And now
you've got the identity statement of I'm
the type of person that does this. I see
this through. And you repeat that
cocktail over and over, over and over,
and following it up with that score. And
all of a sudden, over time, and it will
take time because it is a process, but
over time, you're going to stick to it
because it means something to you and
your husband. You've got the rule about
showing up. You're rating yourself on
how you did that day. You're feeling
good on the days that you killed it and
you're reminding yourself to dig a
little deeper on the days where you
don't. And I promise if you just work
that process over and over and over, two
weeks, a month into this, it's just
going to be second nature. You're going
to be showing up. You're going to be
excited. You're going to see it through.
And that's it. Just work the process.
All right. Who's up next?
Hi, Tom. I'm Nema. I'm a business
strategist and a mindset coach. My
question today is about cold showers. I
know that you're a big fan of cold
showers. I am as well. Uh I want to
understand the exact process that you do
it. Do you start with a cold shower
right away when you step into your
shower? Do you do it in the middle or do
you finish off with a cold shower? How
many minutes do you usually go for? And
do you think that you use purely
willpower to do it on a daily basis or
does it actually become a habit and uh
in a sense easier to do? So I personally
think that it doesn't really physically
become easier to do it but mentally one
can gain the strength to do it on a
daily basis hence as a habit. I would
like to really hear your thoughts on the
topic and thank you very much for your
great show.
All right. So first of all I just want
to talk about the notion of doing hard
things. So doing hard things is
critically important in terms of earning
self-respect. um building those calluses
on your mind as David Gogggins calls
them to have the ability to stick with
something when it gets difficult. It is
such an incredibly powerful skill set
and the only way you're going to get it
is if you do hard things. Um now I want
to be clear that I don't love cold
showers. I hate cold showers. Cold
showers never got easier. Uh in fact, I
would say over time it really began to
chip away at my soul. So I did cold
showers every day for 1 year and 3
months. I had promised myself I would do
it for a month. So in ending up doing it
for 15 months, I was pretty stoked. Uh
now I don't do cold showers anymore. And
I'll go back and explain um the process
I was using when I was doing cold
showers. Now what I'm doing is water
submersion. So cold water submersion
that I find is way more powerful. it is
much more difficult but in a weird way
it's uh more enjoyable. So when I was
doing the cold showers it went like
this. I would get in stand bucket naked
dry shower and just will myself to crank
that on because there was nothing worse
than standing dry knowing that that cold
water is going to hit you. That was by
far the worst is that anticipation of
like do you stop and take a couple
breaths? Do you just get in there and
crank it on like without hesitation? It
was so powerful to have to face that
down day after day after day. It really
was pretty incredible. Uh so that made
it more difficult. I did not find it
hard if I was taking a warm shower. So,
um Wimhof the Iceman recommends that you
do a warm shower like normal, but then
you end on he suggests a start with 30
seconds. You end cold. I actually didn't
find that that hard. And so because that
wasn't hard, I wanted to do it the
hardest way possible by starting just
dry and going straight for the cold. So
that was how I did it the whole time. Um
I would though end on warm most of the
time. Every now and then if it was a hot
day or something, I might uh do cold,
warm, cold. Um it just depended. So
there is something about a entirely cold
shower that's quite powerful, but I
found it very difficult to warm up
after. Um, and so that can slow the
rhythm of a day down and I just didn't
want to give that much time to it. Okay,
so I do that for 15 months. I end up
growing this resentment towards my
shower. I didn't like the way that felt.
I wanted to get back to actually
enjoying my shower. And I thought, you
know, I have always had a lingering
notion in my mind that it would be far
better on a physiological level to get
the the um response that you're looking
for at a cellular level from true
submersion. And since I have a swimming
pool that for most of the year it's not
heated, I thought, well, I'll just start
going in the pool um during the winter
months, um pool gets down to about 58
degrees. That's plenty cold, let me tell
you. And um it is so much more intense
than a cold shower because there is no
part of your body that isn't getting the
life force sucked out of it by the cold.
And so one, you feel like a total badass
doing it and you get that
self-confidence. You get that, yeah,
like I'm here. I'm doing hard things.
I'm pushing through. So that gave me a
lot of confidence that it was having the
kind of physiological effect that I was
hoping it was have. Um, so if you can do
submersion, I highly recommend it. Um, I
would stay in the pool water. Again, it
was about 58°. I would stay in that. The
longest I did was 22° 22 minutes, excuse
me. And by the time I got out, I was
moving so slowly and my teeth, like I
was so afraid I was going to bite my
tongue because my teeth were chattering
so hard. Um, and so I thought, okay,
that's a little too extreme. So I
started backing it off. Uh, and then the
important part is to warm up naturally.
So I wouldn't end up taking a warm
shower until say 45 minutes later um to
give my body uh the command that it had
to warm up on its own. Um, that was, I
think, more powerful than the the cold
shower. So, now I'm more focused on
submersion
word.
Next up,
hey Tom. Uh, just wanted to take a
second to thank you and your team for
all the positive impact you had on my
life. I'm Urus from Lethia and I'm
currently studying physiootherapy. I'm
also an aspiring personal trainer. And
my question is, I have these ups and
downs of really good productive work and
then something happens and I get down to
this baseline which isn't terrible, but
I just know that I can do more and I
just want to find out how do I keep that
habit of always producing good quality
work with minimal to no downfalls.
Yeah, that's it. Thank you. Okay, so
this is very straightforward, but there
are a lot of different pieces that are
going to go into it. So, the first thing
you need to do whenever somebody wants
something, they know what they want,
they've got a clear goal, they're
prepared to do the work, but they just
find there's pretty radical
inconsistencies as they're trying to uh
move along that path to really get
something going. Number one is that you
need to really get amped up about why
that goal matters to you. Because once
you know why the goal matters, that's
going to be that thing that gives you
meaning and purpose that turns into a
passion that allows you to show up and
keep doing it when you're bored. Because
boredom kills more dreams than failure.
I just promise you. You just get to the
point where it's such a grind and you've
got to do it day after day, month after
month, year after year. It's just like
it really drags on. It's like that old
Outcast song, forever, forever, ever,
forever, ever. It's like it's easy to do
something once, maybe you can do it for
a week, but when you have to just keep
at the grind, then you really have to
have a strong why. So figuring out why
is it that you care enough about this?
Because, by the way, if you don't care
enough about it to do all this, go find
something that you do care enough about
to go after. Because you can do anything
you want in life, just not everything.
Now, if you're as angered by that notion
as I am, you realize whatever it is
you're going to give yourself over to
and do all the way, it needs to be
something that you are really on fire
about. Now, getting on fire about
something, you're not born with that.
You cultivate that fire. So, you're
going to pick something. Starts as an
interest. You're going to pick it,
engage with it, fan the flames of that
fire by talking about it to yourself, to
your friends, to your family, to anybody
who will listen about why it matters to
you, and then you go hard on that. So,
like for me, I'm trying to build the
next Disney. But why? Why am I trying to
build the next Disney? Because I've
worked with so many people in the inner
cities that were extraordinary, far
smarter than I am, and they're doing
nothing with their life. Why? Because
they don't have the right frame of
reference. Their mindset is so limited
that even though they have all of this
natural skill that they could build upon
and turn into something absolutely
extraordinary, they're not doing it
because they're not thinking about
themselves and the world in the right
way. Okay? I'm not prepared to live in
that world right now in America. The
number one predictor of your future
success is your zip code. Okay? I want
to introduce you to a word, maybe you
know it, maybe you don't, called an
animus. something that that pisses you
off enough that it animates you to take
action. Now, you want to find something,
a spark of something and really turn
that into this raging inferno of I am
not prepared to live in a world where
that's true and now I'm going to show up
every day and I'm going to fight. Make
sure you focus it. Get it specific to a
person. Don't let it be abstract. Who's
someone you know and love that's
struggling with that thing that you want
to put an end to? Do you have a mom
that's struggling with depression? a
brother that has massive anxiety,
whatever the case may be, there's
something out there that animates you,
that you want to fix, and you attach
that to a person that you love and care
for. Why? So that on a Friday at 2 a.m.
when you're exhausted and you're bored
and you know you need to show up and
have the discipline to see this through,
you don't want to be thinking in the
abstract. You want to be thinking very
concretely about a person who is
struggling with that thing and then you
can fight for them. I always said at
Quest, I was trying to end metabolic
disease because my mom and my sister
were morbidly obese and I didn't want
them to die. So at Friday at 2 a.m. I
wasn't showing up thinking about protein
bars. I showed up thinking about them.
And suddenly when you're fighting for
somebody like that and it's personal,
you'll have the energy that you need to
see it through. Word. Next.
Hi, my name is Aisha. I live in Boston,
Massachusetts and I'm a financial
consultant. So for my job, we are
required to pass certain certification
in order to be promoted. As I was
struggling finding time to study, I was
advised to wake up couple hours early
and study before work as my brain would
be fresh and and more focused.
And I notice on days when I'm truly
motivated, I can get up even before my
alarm goes on and put in the number of
hours I want. But on days when I don't
feel motivated, I will keep on snoozing
my alarm until my usual wake up time and
my and try to rationalize my excuses in
my head. I'm usually pretty hard on
myself and I noticed that my brain has
found a trick to rationalize my excuses
when I don't feel motivated.
I know that discipline will be the
solution. But what is what will be the
process to actually implement the habit
slash discipline to just do it without
thinking when I'm lacking motivation?
Thank you.
All right, here we go. I'm going to give
you the three steps to this magic
formula. And if you do these, it will
work every time. So, number one, like
we've mentioned multiple times already
in this episode, motivation. You have to
want it. It has to be something that you
are on fire for. Literally, as you were
describing it, I was like, "Oh my god, I
would study so much. I would ace this
exam. You have no idea. I would
absolutely kill this
because that's my identity." So, why is
it that you want to do this? Is it that
you want to be the best? Is it just the
promotion? If it's the promotion and
this is just about money, what does that
mean? Why does it matter? What are you
going to do with the money? Are you the
first person in your family to be
promoted that far? Are you setting an
example for your son or your daughter?
Like, when you attach it to something
that really matters, like for me, it's
like, I'm going to dominate. Wherever
you put me, I'm going to dominate.
That's just my thing. My identity is so
wrapped up in outworking everybody else.
I love it. So, I love going hard,
learning, putting more time and energy.
My thing is part of my identity, you
ready for the secret? Part of my
identity is like I will work so hard at
something that people will just assume
I'm naturally gifted at that thing.
Because the alternative to believe that
I'm spending
40 hours a week, 40 hours a week on top
of my full-time job to study for that
thing. People, they won't believe that I
would put that kind of energy and effort
into something.
but I will. And so to them, it just
looks like magic. Now, I love that [ __ ]
so much that it becomes very easy for me
to use identity statements. Okay, so
we've got motivation.
We're getting amped about it. It matters
to us for some reason. Now, we've got
identity statements. I'm the type of
person that I'm the type of person that
works so hard people assume it's magic.
I'm the type of person that works so
hard at something that people just
assume I'm naturally talented. Okay, I
love that. I love saying that about
myself. I love knowing that it's true. I
love knowing that I can trust myself to
put in the time and the energy to own it
because I'm the type of person that
knows information is really power and
that if I go in and I work and I get
better at this thing that I'm going to
be able to outperform other people,
right? Skills have utility. And then the
third thing that you're going to do to
absolutely
dominate is you're going to set rules in
your life.
[snorts]
I don't care if you've got motivation. I
don't care if I have motivation. I get
out of bed in 10 minutes or less every
day, no matter what. No excuses. But
Tom, your leg has snapped off at the
knee. I don't care. I'm getting out of
bed in 10 minutes or less. But Tom, you
only got 45 minutes to sleep. I don't
care. I'm getting out of bed in 10
minutes or less. I have a hard and fast
rule. It's what I call a bright line.
There are bright lines in my life. There
is no excuse to lay in bed. There is no
rationalization. Nothing matters. It
does not matter. Has it been 10 minutes
since you woke up? Then you got to get
your ass out of bed. It's that simple.
And every day, if I miss, and when I
miss, I miss by seconds. But if I miss,
I confess to my wife. If I miss, I'll
even confess on camera and let people
know, hey, I didn't get out of bed in 10
minutes or less. Now, keep in mind, it
was probably 10 minutes and 1 second.
But even then if the clock is ticked
over to the 11th minute I got to wrap
myself out because I don't tolerate that
in myself. I have that hard and fast
rule. It is a bright line and I act in
accordance. Now the reason that I had to
use bright lines is I used to in my
mid20s I used to lay in bed for four and
five hours a day every day if I could
get away with it. So hard and fast
rules. And then just as a bonus thing I
will say this. Don't set an alarm. Go to
bed earlier. Go to bed however early you
need to go to bed in order to wake up so
that you have a couple of hours. Then
your mind really will be fresh. Then you
don't need to hit the snooze alarm. I
built a billion-dollar business without
setting an alarm. Impact theory has
grown by 400% in the last two years
alone. I've done all that without
setting an alarm. There. You do not need
to set alarms. I'm telling you, you just
need to go to bed earlier. And this is
where a lot of people mess up is they're
living in this chronic state of fatigue
wondering why they can't see things
through. So I forget the coach that said
it, but this is so powerful. They said
the quote is fatigue makes cowards of us
all. Don't allow yourself to be tired.
It is a unique ring of hell to walk
through life tired. So get the sleep you
need. Set the rules. Make sure you've
got the motivation. Know why you're
doing what you're doing. And then rinse
and repeat. Just get after it.
Next up.
Hi, I'm Emmy and I am a breakup and
relationship coach based out of Boston,
Massachusetts. And my question for you,
Tom, is I recently started my business
over this past year. I am still a high
school biology teacher of 16 years. And
when I come home from school every day,
I am mentally drained. And so I find it
really challenging to stay consistent
with working on my business and doing
what I should be doing to keep um for
momentum and progress. So my question
is, do you have any suggestions for
habits that I should create to help
myself um work on my business and not
have the things that I accomplish just
be kind of random? Um like my check off
list is kind of all over the place. So
any insights that you have to share with
me would be really appreciated. And I
know that you're probably thinking, "Ah,
these are just excuses. You're tired. We
get it. We're all tired." But I'm hoping
for some habit suggestions.
All right.
I don't think you're just making
excuses. I think that cellular energy is
going to be what you need to focus on.
And I can't tell you how much I hate
that I have to pay attention to my body
in order to achieve the things that I
want to achieve. I want to just be able
to work around the clock. But I know if
I try to do that, I won't be cognitively
optimized and I won't have the energy
that I need. So when I go give talks,
oftentimes I'll end up after the talk um
answering questions. And my record is I
once stood in a hallway with whatever 50
people around me answering questions
without even stopping to pee for 11 and
a half hours. Now, by the end of it,
people were like, "How the hell are you
doing this?" And the answer was because
there are two types of energy. There's
psychological energy, right? You're
exhausted, right? Imagine it. Oh, you
know those days you're wiped out, but
you got that one song. You put that song
on and you still got a little ass
shaking left in you and you can just
feel it. It changes your mood. You're
ready to get up. You're ready to get
down. That's psychological energy. Okay,
we can actually make you suddenly feel
like you have this burst of energy.
The other part, the one that won't let
you down is real cellular energy. Now
within your cells are a whole bunch of
these things called mitochondria.
Mitochondria are separate little
organels, okay? They have their own DNA.
They are not you, but they are inside
your cells and they are the power plant
of your body. And if you don't do things
to push your mitochondria to stay razor
sharp, productive, to proliferate, you
just won't be able to generate the
energy. This is why I'm always telling
people, you are having a biological
experience. Whatever this is, your body
may have been given to you by God. Fair
enough. But he gave you a body. And now
you have to deal with the realities of
going through life in a body that if
you're not eating right, you're not
exercising, you will not be able to
generate the ATP, which makes you feel
like you can go and conquer mountains
and do whatever you want. But if you
really don't have the energy, then
that's a nightmare. This goes back to
being tired is a unique ring of hell. it
is just absolutely miserable. So, you're
going to have to get your diet right,
which is probably the number one thing
to get your energy levels up at a
cellular level. You got to get your diet
right. And then to um really push
things, you want to start exercising.
And then another one, going back to one
of our early questions, cold exposure is
another way to get your vascular system
going, to get your ability to generate
ATP up high because cold exposure has a
tremendous impact on your mitochondria.
Okay? So getting that right, I think is
going to solve a lot of problems for
you. And you may even need to go and get
your thyroid levels checked, like
there's really could be a lot going on
biologically. So to put it all into the
language of a habit, you're going to go
to bed early, however early you need to
go to bed to not set an alarm. Number
two, when you wake up, don't eat. You're
going to work out. Work out fasted.
Okay? I would highly recommend that you
lift weights rather than doing a bunch
of cardio. And then next meditation.
You'll be shocked how far that goes. And
then we want to um get some cold
exposure in there if we can. That would
be a really great way to get you going.
And as far as diet goes, making sure
when you do eat uh and try to do
intermittent fasting so that you have
call it a 16-hour fasting window and an
eight hour feeding window. And so you're
going to push your first meal back to
post-workout. And then when you eat,
you're going to make it whole foods. So
you're going to be eating green leafy
vegetables. You're going to be eating
meat. If you eat meat, that's absolutely
fine. Um, no processed foods. If you can
avoid it, you should be less than 10% of
what you eat should be processed.
Obviously, zero is the ideal. Uh, but
realistically, if you can make less than
10% of it processed, you're going to be
golden. If you do that all the time,
you're going to feel like a million
bucks. You you just cannot overestimate
how big of a deal sleep, diet, and
exercise make. It is lifechanging, and
it's the one thing most people aren't
willing to do. But if you want cellular
energy, that's the habit you're going to
have to get in.
Word.
All right, who's next?
Hello, Impact Theory family. Thanks for
this opportunity. I'm Ma Darling. I
currently live in Arizona.
So, this is the question I have for you.
I'm currently in a job that I hate. I'm
currently at a weight that I definitely
hate. I'm ashamed of it. And no matter
how horrible it is and how isolating it
is, I just can't bring myself to get out
of this routine of comfortability. Uh,
at the age of 15, I lost my mother and
then I shortly became uh shortly after
that, I became homeless. And so a lot of
my behavior I excuse it away because I
say, "Oh, you've had a rough life. I've
been to therapy. I got into
metaphysical. Even did hypnosis. And
nothing is shaking me to my core. How
can I become
comfortable with being uncomfortable?
Thank you guys so much. I love you guys.
Hopefully you can help me. See you.
Bye."
Okay. So, here is the hard reality that
um I know all too well uh growing up in
a morbidly obese family. Unfortunately,
no one is going to be able to help you.
We can give you all the tools and
tactics and tips, but at the end of the
day, you've got to be in a place where
you want it. You're excited about it.
You're amped. You're imagining like what
your dream job is going to be, and
you're figuring out what you're going to
have to do to get that dream job. and
you're going to go through the
application process and all the
rejection you're going to have to go
through in order to finally get where
you want to go. Maybe you have to study
something. Maybe you have to build a a
you know a marketing deck on spec or
whatever to get their attention. But
you're going to do all that because
you're excited about what that dream job
is. And you know on a long enough
timeline you can win that job. But it's
about like I'm not moving away from
hating this job because that's obviously
not enough. I'm moving towards something
that's exciting to me. and we're gonna
build that energy. We're going to build
that excitement, that enthusiasm. We're
going to tell ourselves, "I'm the type
of person that does whatever the hell it
takes to get that job." So, you're gonna
figure out what it takes. You're going
to call them. You're going to ask, "What
does the ideal candidate look like? What
do I need to do in the interview process
to make you confident that I'm the right
person for you to hire?" And then
whatever they tell you to do, do that
and more. The number of people that
think, "Well, I shouldn't have to do all
that just for a job interview." It's
like, "Sure, fine. You're not going to
get the job." Like everybody wants to be
blown away.
To have unusual success, your job is to
leave people in awe. Okay? So that's the
job side. We're going to do all that.
We're going to go leave them in awe.
We're going to get our dream job. We're
going to set our mind to something.
We're going to keep going. We're going
to push past all the rejection, which is
inevitable. It's not a commentary on
you. It is the nature of getting a job.
Now, the next part I can tell you right
now, there's one word that's causing all
your problems, and that is you're
ashamed. You're ashamed of your weight.
Don't be. Okay? This is just biology.
We're playing a game of figuring out
what do we have to do to get the body
that we want. Now, the problem is your
biology is going to [ __ ] with you. So,
did you know fat is an organ? meaning
like your liver, like your heart, like
your kidneys. It is an organ. It
secretes hormones. It tells your body to
want certain things, to behave in
certain ways, to eat certain foods. Your
microbiome is essentially an organ. It's
five pounds of bacteria in your gut that
respond to what you eat, that the
population changes based on what you
eat. And then to make sure that they
survive, they keep telling you to eat
more of that. So you've got your fat
cells screaming at you to keep eating,
to keep overfeeding so that they can
stay safe. They don't want to um feel
like they've entered into a famine
period where now they have to get rid of
this incredibly
um useful extra stored energy. You've
got your microbiome saying, "Hey, that
fast food that you've been eating, eat
more of that." Because we're optimized
for it. We want it. We need it. We won't
survive if you change your diet. So,
you've got a lot of things working
against you from a biological level.
Okay? I'll say this. The deck is stacked
against you. Mom died when you were
young. That had massive
cognitive implications. Okay? Would have
at a very formative age impacted you.
You were homeless. That creates this
sense of fight or flight. It's a high
stress moment. Not only is that going to
push you to eat more, but I'm sure at
the time you were struggling financially
as well, which means you're going to be
eating cheaper foods which are going to
be highly processed, okay? Which is
going to exacerbate the problem. So all
of this stress, inflammation, emotional
trauma, all of that is going on, okay?
You have every reason in the world to
not get your act together, right?
But I will say this.
Now what?
You can keep doing what you're doing now
and you're going to keep getting the
result that you're getting. And that's
fine, by the way. You shouldn't be
ashamed of that. If that's a life that
you choose, choose it. Do it. Don't be
ashamed of it. Recognize that it is a
choice. If, on the other hand, you're
like, "Fuck this. I'm not happy here. I
don't want to live like this. I want to
do something different." Well, now we
have to go into it with our eyes wide
open. Your biology is working against
you, but that doesn't mean that you
can't overcome it. You absolutely can.
There is no human being that is
incapable of losing weight. It's just
that the only bulletproof way to lose
weight, which I will tell you, I will
give it to you. It would be the world's
simplest thing. But your fat cells are
going to scream out. They're going to
mess with your hormones. Your microbiome
is going to mess with you. So, you're
gonna have to want it badly enough to
see it through. Now, I know you can do
it. It's just a question of whether or
not you're going to want it badly enough
to see it through. But here's all you
have to do. Eat whole food exclusively.
Okay? Green leafy vegetables, nothing
processed, chicken, beef, um fish. Keep
the fish small if you can to avoid
toxins, but you know, as long as we're
not eating swordfish or eating it for
every meal, it's probably better than
some of the alternatives that you're
taking in. Zero processed food, no
crackers, cookies, none of that stuff.
First of all, it has a just obscene
amount of sugar. Has glyphosate, which
has all kinds of downstream problems on
your microbiome that are going to
continue to create problems. I just want
to say this is doable. It is hard. But
even if the deck is stacked against you,
even if you do legitimately have it
worse than every other human being on
the planet, now what?
Now what? What are you going to do?
You're not a bad person. If you're like,
it's just not worth the energy. Fine.
Know what the realities are. It's going
to shorten your life. Whatever emotional
problems you have over looking that way,
uh the inflammation doesn't feel good,
all of that. But you're not a bad
person. And if you want to go in this
direction, well then it's like, [ __ ]
let's celebrate what that's about,
right? Let's know our why. Let's know
what we're going for. And if it's to
look really good in a [ __ ] pair of
skinny jeans, then let's own it. Let's
look really good in those skinny jeans.
Don't let people tell you that you have
to be doing it because you want to be
healthy. I love some healthy. But man,
whatever really motivates you, whatever
is really true, whatever actually gets
you excited, don't let people shame you
into thinking you have to do it for, you
know, some specific reason. Because let
me tell you, the vast majority of pounds
that have ever been lost all throughout
human history is about looking good in
skinny jeans. That's just the reality.
So, but that doesn't make you a better
person. This doesn't make you a worse
person. Over here, you're less healthy.
It's going to have its consequences. And
over here, it's going to be harder.
You're going to have to stay focused.
you're going to have to keep pushing
through. So, decide what it is you want
to do and get [ __ ] amped about it.
And if you can't get amped about it,
focus on that. You got to focus on the
motivation. You've got to get yourself
in a position where you want the change.
But don't spend cycles
lashing yourself, hating yourself. I can
think of nothing worse. The only thing
that makes me sad is when somebody's
overweight eating ice cream by
themselves in the corner of the cold
stone crying, right? That's [ __ ]
heartbreaking. An overweight person
enjoying ice cream like it was their
last [ __ ] meal. Good on you. The
person over here that never touches ice
cream, man, because they're going hard.
They know what they want. They're amped.
They want to live forever. They want to
feel good. They want to look good. They
want to be strong. I get that. Put time
and energy into it. They're choices.
No matter how hard something is, you've
got a choice.
And so I always come back to that one
simple phrase. Now what? I'm in this
situation. Let me tell you, Tom Billu
has a very easy time putting on fat and
a very hard time getting lean. Now what?
You going to work harder and get the
six-pack abs or not?
And that's it.
All right. I know you can do this. You
got this. I'm cheering for you. But
ultimately, as much as I wish I could
want it for people, I cannot. You've got
to want this for yourself. You have to
take responsibility
and know that you can get whatever you
want. Whole food. That's it. You do
that. Be a life changer. All right,
guys. I'm telling you, you are but one
habit, one killer routine away from
having the exact life that you want.
Your life is a reflection of the choices
that you make. It doesn't mean that some
things aren't way harder for you than
they are for other people. It doesn't
mean that other people don't have more
mo more more motivation than you. It
doesn't mean that some people don't
generate more cellular energy than you.
But all of us can make a different
choice at any time. Set rules in our
lives. Focus on our motivation. Get
super hyped about something. find a way
by connecting this hard ass thing that
we have to do to our identity to a
person that we love and letting it be
about them and not just that thing or
focusing on the end result and being
hyped about how good we're going to look
in the skinny jeans.
You're having a biological experience.
Figure out what are the things that you
need to do to manipulate your biology to
get the results that you want. Right?
setting rules, being excited,
following through on something because
you said you would, you told yourself,
you told other people to trigger, going
back to the biology, to trigger that
desire for congruence. Man, I said it to
them. [ __ ] they're watching. I better
do it. Use any tool at your disposal.
But if you get the habits, the routines,
the rules, the identity right, you get
all that stuff right, and you will have
your ideal life. All right, guys, that's
it. This really is doable. You can have
any life you want. So go out, make it
real. And if any of that sounded like
[ __ ] I want you to let me know. I
want people to come at me. I want people
to say, "No, no, no. This guy's just a
hype machine." Cool. Come at me, bro.
Because I'm telling you, this stuff
works. I've done this in my own life.
I've watched other people do it. I'll
take any heckling people have. If you
think something is dumb, let me know.
You'll either change my mind and open me
up to something new or you'll give me a
chance to show you that there's nuance
and that this stuff really does come
together into a tapestry of magically
delicious lives. There it is. All right,
guys. Until next time, my friends, be
legendary. Take care.
You are here with me today. I'm going to
be answering your questions and we're
going to be talking all about
procrastination.
actually doing [music] something with
all of your potential, turning it into
real skills, and then deploying that
into the real world. That is my
obsession, and that is what we're going
to be focused on today.