Video summary
Tony Gash addresses the public controversy surrounding Kandi Burress and her ex-husband Todd, framing the situation as a stark lesson on the consequences of defiling marital boundaries through threesomes. He argues that while some men may initially participate in such arrangements for fun or to avoid cheating, the ultimate outcome is often divorce and social ruin for the woman involved. Gash contends that when a man like Todd exposes his wife's bedroom business to the world, it serves as a "social black eye" that permanently damages her reputation. He suggests that this exposure reveals the true nature of the relationship, where the husband loses all respect for the wife once she engages in acts outside of monogamy, viewing her as "trash" rather than a potential partner for marriage.
The speaker delves into the psychological and social dynamics at play, asserting that a "real man" with self-respect will never be interested in a woman who has participated in threesomes because he cannot compete with another woman's intimate knowledge of her body. He posits that by entertaining same-sex partners or engaging in group sex, a woman signals to men that she is either lesbian or morally loose, leading them to treat her poorly. Gash criticizes the notion that these acts are harmless fun, pointing out that they introduce unnecessary health risks like bacteria and viruses while fostering an unhealthy level of lust. He uses examples of celebrities like Tayanna Taylor and Kandi Burress herself to illustrate that even when threesomes seem successful in the short term, they frequently lead to infidelity and divorce, proving that such arrangements do not save marriages but rather destroy them.
Gash also touches on his personal history with Kandi, noting that he once cast her in a stage play years ago, which adds a layer of personal disappointment to his current critique. He expresses frustration that she chose a much shorter man like Todd over someone who could match her status as a celebrity, suggesting that she was delusional about her own level and worth. He warns women to be extremely careful about who they marry and what compromises they make, emphasizing that men have a "rolodex" of past partners and judge women based on their sexual history. Ultimately, he concludes that the only way for a woman to maintain respect and dignity in the eyes of men is to remain monogamous, as any deviation from this standard invites judgment, exploitation, and eventual abandonment by a partner who no longer values her.
Read the full video transcript
Hey, Tony Gash here popping in. I am in
the hotel, so y'all forgive me.
In a Marriott, y'all get this old brown
thing. Nice little Marriott, not in New
Orleans, but um close to the airport.
Came to do a podcast, the Rich Lessons
podcast. So, been on a podcast tour of
sorts, but saw a lot of noise online
about one of my Instagram followers and
can't say friends, but I know her, have
talked to her, Candy Bur, her
ex-husband Todd.
And it's crazy that,
you know, it it's crazy, but this is a
sign right here.
And for one, I want to say I apologize
to the women because it's certain things
that go
with certain things. And so what I mean
by that is when you have a little man
like Todd,
you run the risk of him doing what he's
doing now that they have gone through
this divorce. And that's unfortunate
because it's a it's a blow.
It's a slap in the face to the short
kings because now the short kings is
like, "Dang, now we down." Because you
want to kiss and tell your wife giving
you threesomes,
which was your dream. You got a
celebrity
giving you threesomes and then you get a
divorce and you go and tell the world
that your wife was giving you
threesomes.
And that's why I don't believe in
threesomes. For one, because it's nasty.
Two,
somebody in it is flawed. Everybody in
it is flawed. But now you see he can't
keep that to himself because he know as
a man
we think
that is nasty of a woman. Like as a real
man we think that's nasty of a woman. So
he knows that by saying Candy was giving
him threesomes
he's putting a stain on her. He giving
her a black eye. A social black eye.
It's no different than yada
Lil Yoda punching his
broomstick wife
in the eye. Todd punching Candy in the
eye
by telling they marital bed business.
And so that's why I have to say, you
know what? If y'all want y'all a man six
foot or taller, okay, it don't mean he's
not gonna tell your business. Understand
that. But here Candy was.
She gave this little man a opportunity.
And it probably was because her ex was
probably,
you know, super tall because it looked
like Candi daughter is tall. So that
make me think c that her daughter unless
well Candy is real short but her
daughter look tall like a 59
to 6 foot. So it made me think Candi
daughter
father is tall and if that's the case
she went from a tall or taller man to
this itty bitty man. I don't know how
tall Todd is, but he just looks
extremely little in every picture I've
seen. Like Kevin Hart height.
He looks smaller than Kevin Hart, but
Candy is short. I met him in person.
And so she give this little man a chance
and then here he go out here running his
mouth
and he's socially abusing her
because that's nobody business
and it's sad that
he doing this to her but they say Candy
did her play or something too. So, but
it just it make you think be careful who
you marry.
Be careful what you compromise on.
Be careful what you willing to do. So
now, if the threesome was with women, it
lets me know
that
Candy is lesbian. but
want to have a husband. I don't believe
in nothing bisexual.
If you do something with your same
gender, you're gay. It's no if ends and
buts about it. I know y'all want to make
yourself feel good about being bisexual.
You're gay. Just be gay. Just go be gay.
Don't waste nobody else time. Oh, I want
both. No, you're greedy. You're gay and
you're greedy. just be with one.
But yo, if you would do something with
your same gender, you're gay. There's no
if, ends, and buts about it. And ain't
no way we could get around it. Ain't no
way we could get around it. So listen to
me.
It's unfortunate. And to the short kings
out there, that what they call y'all.
Ain't none of my king now. So don't get
that twisted now. going to get slot in
the mouth. But to the short kings out
there, man, I apologize
cuz y'all down one. Y'all down bad off
of Todd right here running here ragging
him out, which they hadn't said that
before. They hadn't came out before. But
the fact that he just popping off right
now and then the little video I seen
somebody sent me, one of y'all sent me.
was the guy Peter asking him like was
that real man about that about them
threes or whatever and he like yeah we
had a lot of threes on something he
said. So now the other thing they say
about them smaller guys like that is
they say that a lot of times that
because God didn't give them height, he
gave them something else down there. So
Todd could have could be confident in
that area to where he like, "Yo, I'm
loving this here threesome. I'm out here
woo woo woo woo woo woo doo and putting
wood." So maybe he felt comfortable, but
it's just very sad to see. But I want
y'all to see that that is what you get
when you defile the bed roll. When you
do things outside of God's will,
it's no rules to it. It's no rules. And
this is what comes of it.
This chatty patty,
everybody know your your business. I'm
going tell you the unfortunate part
about this is Candi will have to unless
she's willing to be
a lesbian publicly,
she will have to be sexually intimate
with women privately
and sexually intimate with men privately
and she will not be able to get a real
man. And that's what Todd knows. Todd
knows by telling the world that and and
this what I'm guaranteeing y'all. I'm
telling y'all this now. You could think
what you want to think. I know what I'm
talking about. A real man will never be
with a woman
who he knows has had threesomes.
Now what will happen is
a
down low man
will be with
a woman who has had threesomes because
he doesn't care. He down low. He's
sleeping with men anyways. He don't care
what you doing. And he'll ask you for a
threesome with a woman. And then one day
he'll ask you, "Well, what about if we
have a man? That ain't what I want to
do, but if that's what you, you know,
cuz you a woman,
do you want to do it with another man?"
And then down low, brother will propose
a man in there.
That is what comes to women who men know
have had. Y'all forgive my look at the
TV and watch this equalizer too. You
know Denzel love more Denzel watching
the movie.
But that is what a man will propose
to a woman that he knows has had
threesomes. The other thing about it is
because a real man,
we don't want no woman who we know. Like
we know it's a possibility a woman have
been flipped and tossed, but we don't
want no woman that we know has been
flipped and tossed. We don't want no
woman that we know have been
doing stuff with another woman because
we a man and so we know that we don't
know the woman's body the way another
woman does the way a woman knows the
body. So we know we can't please a woman
body the way a woman can. So if a woman
entertain a woman, that other woman know
exactly what a woman want and need. As
men, we don't have that body part. So we
don't know how it works. So we learning
on the fly. And if our woman don't tell
us exactly what to do and what she need,
we'll be in there all wrong and not
know. And it's a lot of women who don't
know they body or what they want. And so
they can't tell the man what to do. So a
man don't want to compete with no woman
who got the very thing that she is also
pleasing on another woman. So that's why
real men who have
any type of selfrespect
but also ego
confidence
just genuine
and real
woman that had no threesome.
And then it also says something about
the woman. For one, it say the woman is
either lesbian or if it's another man,
then it say the woman is loose. And so
Todd know that. He know that it's taboo
and he knows that he's damaging her
name. Now to the heathens and to the
little, you know, the current mut
buckets, it's not damaging. Like they
don't care at all. Like they want to
dive off in there. You know, Yoda and
all his wives, they probably want to
dive off in there like they ready. Hey
yo, let go. I remember I met a lady on
Twitter when she was beautiful, very
beautiful lady. She was like, "Would you
and your wife be polyamorous?" And I was
like, "What is that?"
She say it's where
all the people
know about each other and everybody in a
relationship. So she say it's like me
and my partner know about you
and your wife and your wife knows that
you're sleeping with me and I know that
my man is sleeping with your wife. I
said, "Absolutely not.
Absolutely not."
And a lady asked me the other day, just
say, "Would you ever have sex in the
same room
with another couple?"
And now back in the day in college, that
was common. Like that was that was
little something you did in high school
and in college. And as an adult, it's
like especially as a Christian. So I
told my wife, I said, "Hey, lady asked
me that."
And I said, "I already know the answer."
I said, "That's something that's
something you'll do." She put absolutely
not. She said, "That's a absolute no."
Cuz when I first said it to her, she put
um and I say, "Is that a yes?" Then she
wrote absolutely not. And listen, that's
not something I want to do either
because I'm conservative. So, it ain't
something I want to do, but that's
something that some people want to do.
And so, these people get into this
stuff. And it's unfortunate a lot of
times. I think that
regular sex, I believe it was Candy, who
said her grandmother taught her at a
very young age. I don't know if she said
nine or 12, but I believe I remember
hearing this that her grandmother taught
her how to touch herself
and told her, "Girl, you better, you
know, take care of yourself." And so I
think that when people are exposed to
sex at a young age and two or orgasm or
whatever,
it just regular stuff gets boring. And
that's why they venture into like these
threesomes and all this extra stuff
and they get into all of that. And but
it's like listen like I don't I want
y'all to understand you don't have to do
more
than the regular just man and woman
one onone and what y'all want to do.
Like, don't feel like you got to do all
this extra because when you do all this
extra, like think about it. Tayiana
Taylor went on the Breakfast Club, I
think it was, and said that she was
giving Iman Shumpert threesomes.
And yet he still cheated on her and they
went through a divorce.
Candy Burus giving Todd threesomes and
they still went through a divorce. So
think about that now for those of us who
is just one on one
mono e mono
man and woman our marriage is lasting.
We lasting n but the people that's going
into threesome ain't threesome supposed
to be more fun. Ain't threesome supposed
to be
like, "Let me bring the fun to my man so
he don't have to go out and cheat."
Ain't that the point of a threesome?
How are y'all having threesomes and
going through divorces? That don't make
no sense to me.
But it does make sense to me because
you're defiling the bed. You introducing
unnecessary
lust and you're giving in and you're
fulfilling lust and a level of lust that
is unhealthy. It's unrecommended.
You should not be doing it. You're
swapping all of this bacteria.
All of this bacteria. It ain't even got
to be herpes or genital warts or
tronometry
or whatever it is or
chlamydia or gorrhea. It just pH balance
and just
bacteria
and it just think about that
like you swapping all that bacteria and
then think about it. Anybody who willing
to have a threesome obviously has a lot
of bodies.
So you don't know who they done slept
with. You don't know what demons they
done laid down with because anybody like
listen I was out there and ain't never
had no threesome. You see what I'm
saying? I was out there
and I never had So when I think about
threesome
I'm like oh
you're a different kind of nasty.
You are a different kind of nasty.
And I'mma tell you, man,
me, I'm too jealous. I don't want to see
nobody touching my woman.
I been shot you in the back of your
head. You talking about Theresa be a
two. I been shot in your head, man. I
can't see nobody touch my And I'mma tell
you like right here.
If I walked in on somebody touch my one
to be a 187
right there.
He he threw for he threw for
and and he get out of there before I get
to my gun. Well, I'm gonna be hunting
you for the rest of my life like Liam
Niss. Well, you gonna have to hide good.
Boy, you gonna pay a price. You gonna
pay a price.
Put that on everything. I love And so
threesome. No,
no, I wouldn't be able to do it. And
then so here go Todd little butt
coming out here telling the woman
business and then Candy took and made
her a statement and she upset about it
and she's saying this let me know I did
the right thing. I don't know if Todd
was stealing money from her or being
petty or whatever. I don't know what it
was why why they got divorced but cuz I
don't understand how you get a divorce
if you already have threesomes. So it
can't really be for cheating. Like is it
if it's is it for abuse? Like what y'all
getting divorced for? Like if you having
threesome, your marriage ain't got no
morals. Your marriage ain't got no
standards. Anyways, it's like that's the
thing that y'all got to understand. You
can't be sending mixed signals. You
can't be talking about, oh, I don't want
you to steal from me or I don't want you
to put hands on me if you having
threesomes.
Like to a man in the man mind,
you're trash.
In a man's mind, if you give him a
threesome, you're trash.
Like a man don't give you, that's what I
try to tell women all the time. Y'all
screen record this and put this on
TikTok. When you give a man a threesome
or you let the man go out and
respectfully cheat on you,
he does not give you cool points.
He gives you fool points.
Women think they doing a man a favor by
doing all of this craziness,
letting him cheat.
giving him threesomes,
giving him money,
turning a blind eye. He don't look at
you like you a good woman. He sees you
as trash.
So that's why he steals from you. That's
why he embezzles. That's why he goes
behind your back. That's why he cheats
on you. That's why he does all that
stuff because
he sees you as trash.
This is what you have to realize as a
woman.
Men have
a
rolodex.
So we have references.
So by the age of 21, I would I had been
with I'm guesstimating over a hundred
women intimately.
Not once did one of those women offer me
a threesome.
So when you and I'mma tell you, I know
for a fact Todd wasn't able to do what I
was able to do with his little behind. I
know for a fact he went out there
hitting him like that. He happened to
get candy just because
she just wanted somebody to check the
box. She just wanted a man like any man
would have did would have done would
have been could have got the role. He
just was the role. he fit into the box.
And so
that made him feel like he was him. It
made him feel like he had to made it cuz
now you got a celebrity.
And
you got a celebrity. I casted
Candy for a David E. Talbert stage play
way back in the day.
Probably
It's almost 20 years ago.
David E. Tower was doing a stage play
and I was telling him like he was doing
a stage play. He be like, "Who you think
I should do, you know, put in?" And I
told him, I I said, "Candy Burst cuz I
knew her at the time." And then he was
trying to reach her and he couldn't
reach her. I was like, "I can get on the
phone." And I reached out to her cuz she
was following me on Twitter or whatever
it was. I think it was Twitter. Yes, she
was following me on Twitter. So, I
reached out to her and I think she end
up being a lead in his pack in his play.
I can't remember though. And if it
wasn't that one, she ended up being in
plays after that. But I think she wanted
more money than he was trying to pay
her, but he ain't had the money. But I
casted that play. I I told him Candy
Birds for the woman. Brian White, he was
back then. I say put him as the male. I
think he end up putting Brian in there,
too. Negro didn't even give me my
casting credit. Ragged it behind. Didn't
even give my darn casting credit. Baby,
you owe me a casting credit. Boy, get
slapped in your mouth out there. And so
I just did it on the stream and and I
just wanted to, you know, put Candy on
and bless her cuz I had to met her and
and I met her through one of her
co-workers, one of her colleagues, young
young lady named Meek.
And
And I met Candy in person at her store.
Very amazing spirit. And I remember
telling her cuz I was telling my barber,
"Man, I'm about to meet Candy Birds." He
was like, "Boy." He said, "Boy, Lizard,
boy."
He said, "Candy.
Boy.
All the hood negroes was obsessed with
Candy cuz from TV it looked like she had
a little booty on her.
And she's just, you know, she little
what we call fun size, bite-size. So all
the hood negroes are obsessed with
candy. Me not so much. It was just kind
of, you know, more so regular to me. But
beautiful woman, nice woman. And then
here come Todd, little butt. Cuz see
Candy at her level, she never supposed
to be with no little Todd.
So when I seen that I was like cuz she
could have pulled a Monica and got with
an NBA player, a young NBA player. Kesha
Cole got with an NBA player. That's what
Candy could have did. But she went for
Lil Todd. So now you get Lil Todd,
you're going to go through all of this
that you're going through cuz you got to
remember it was Tayiana Taylor that told
she give Iman Shumpert again. Taya
Taylor, R&B singer, she with an NBA
player. So that became the move. You R&B
person, get you an athlete. And so, but
here she go get with Todd. Nobody knew
Todd. Nobody knew Todd. He little like
it just was like one of them things like
who is this? Like what what is why is
you with this guy when you a celebrity
woman? Like your friend Tiny is with TI,
one of the greatest rappers to ever
live. Like Tiny got Ti.
What? What are you doing with Todd?
So this the thing is like
for women, y'all got to know your level.
You got to know your level. You got to
know who you are and what you can get.
who you got access to. And you don't
have to shoot your shot. You could come
to somebody like me and be like, "Hey,
Tony." Boom boom boom boom. So like
Evelyn Lazada,
I was her matchmaker
for her child's her second child's
father. I'm the one who matched them. So
she came to me and I matched them and
that public knowledge that's put in the
article. So I say that to say that what
you got to do if you a woman you should
never shoot your shot at a man. But you
can come to a man who is a matchmaker
and say, so like women used to come to
me for certain guys and I just had to
break it to him like
you're not on his level.
I know you think God told you
that that's your husband. That wasn't
God.
That would indigestion.
You shouldn't have ate that cheese
pizza.
That cheese pizza got you delusional.
You ate that pizza too late.
That was not God.
God had nothing to do with that.
The man you want me to introduce, that's
not your husband.
That man can have any woman walking. He
do not want you. He do not want you. I
hate to break it to you and see one
thing about me. I'mma tell you the truth
now. I'mma tell you the truth.
So listen to me.
You got to be careful who you marry. You
got to be careful who you get with. You
got to be careful who you choose.
That's the mistake that Candy made. But
then also, you got to know the
implications. You got to know what makes
you a ho.
You got to know.
You got to know
how a man sees you
and what it means to him. Whether it's
true or not, whether you believe it or
not, whether it means that to you or
not, you got to know how men read
behaviors. When Candy gave Todd a
threesome, he lost all respect for her.
At that point, it told him, "I could
trash her. I could steal from her. I
could cheat on her. I could lie to her.
I could dog her out because she is the
bottom of the barrel." And when she gave
him that threesome, we don't know what
all he seen with his eyes.
We don't know what all happened in
there.
So the more that happened in there,
the less he respect her.
And so it just a man will take you from
the mindset of you being wife material
and he will put you in the same class as
a $2 ho street walking prostitute.
That's the unfortunate truth about it.
that a lot of times women are doing
things
for their own pleasure and fun and not
realizing that a man is actually judging
you.
You being judged and you're going to be
treated accordingly.
Whether you like it or not, you're going
to be treated accordingly.
So, hey, this Tony Gins
Join the purpose pushers community
or to all the single men. We need you on
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iPhone, then you could join the web
version of it.
The Destinyapp.com.
Also visit tonygassesacademy.com.
got a $5 course and then also got a
$9.97
fivestep system very very cheap because
we in a recession so I made it cheap for
you not a $5 it is going up a $25 cuz it
was just a special then if you need to
talk to me one on one right now just as
a birthday special for my wife I'm
working overtime for her so the oneonone
sessions
is her birthday gift. So, visit
mymentor.life.
You'll see the link in the description
as low as $100
for a oneonone.
Don't miss out on it. But it don't it
don't book out that far. It only books
out 60 days. So, grab as many of them as
you need cuz the price ain't going to
last. past my wife birthday. Well, it
may go to the end of September just for
the sake of the month. But hey, God
bless you. Keep your head up to Todd and
to Candy. I know you watch this video.
No hard feelings. I just have a job to
do. Don't feel like you got to get a
alias and get him a comments. I'mma know
it's you. God bless you. Keep your head
up, Candy. You know we know each other.
reach out to me if you mad with me or
whatever or what have you. Need to talk.
God bless you. Keep your head up, Todd.
No offense about, you know, you being
smaller. Just I just have to speak the
truth over here. God bless you. Keep
your head up
and we'll be in touch.