Video summary
Tom Bilyeu opens his discussion on training the brain for success by addressing how negative mindsets impact mental health and emotional control, explaining that anxiety and depression are heavily influenced by repetitive thought patterns rooted in evolutionary biology. He describes a dual impulse within humans: the drive to explore and master environments versus the instinct to conserve calories during famine. The brain resolves this conflict through myelination, where neurons firing together frequently become wrapped in fatty tissue for efficient signal transmission, effectively wiring positive or negative thoughts into automatic habits via the default mode network. Consequently, if an individual constantly loops on stress, anxiety, or fear, these states become calorically easier to maintain and dominate their cognitive landscape, leading to chronic high cortisol levels that damage blood vessel elasticity and increase risks of stroke or heart disease. Conversely, cultivating a calm, creative state through repetition rewires the brain for longevity and well-being, though Bilyeu notes this is heavily dependent on maintaining good gut health to avoid dysbiosis which can undermine mental states. To break free from negative default modes, Bilyeu introduces "pattern interrupting," a technique derived from cognitive behavioral therapy that involves consciously stopping unwanted thought loops before they escalate into runaway processes. He illustrates this with his personal strategy for managing overwhelm: when the feeling arises, he immediately interrupts the pattern by stating, "I don't do overwhelm," thereby reclaiming conscious control and deciding to insert feelings of calm instead. This process is reinforced by physiological shifts such as deep diaphragmatic breathing and slowing down, which resets focus before shifting back into an aggressive mental posture to tackle challenges. Similarly, for anxiety, he advises visualizing success rather than failure while engaging in the same physical regulation techniques. By repeatedly practicing these interruptions without self-judgment, individuals can hardwire new, positive neural pathways that function automatically over time, allowing them to handle pressure and creativity with ease. The conversation extends to managing dopamine addiction regarding digital distractions like YouTube, games, and NFTs by establishing strict "bright lines" or rules in one's life that are non-negotiable. Bilyeu shares anecdotes about his own struggles with snacking on Doritos late at night due to counting errors leading to overconsumption, contrasting this with a rigid rule of only eating them on Saturdays after seven hours of sleep. He emphasizes creating hard stops for compulsive behaviors like checking notifications across WhatsApp and Twitter, noting that the dopamine reward is actually tied to anticipation rather than completion; once an item is acquired or viewed, the chemical rush fades but the desire persists if one continues chasing it. To combat this, he recommends turning off visible phone notifications so they do not drip on the mind's attention span and setting specific time limits for recreational activities like gaming, acknowledging that while occasional deviations are acceptable as a margin of error, consistent violation of rules will eventually necessitate stricter boundaries to prevent destructive behavior patterns. Bilyeu further outlines seven essential strategies required to achieve any goal: extreme clarity and focus on exactly what is desired; leveraging both pleasure and pain for massive excitement and motivation; cultivating desire; applying pressure through the fear of failure; developing a solid strategy; avoiding overthinking in favor of fast, aggressive action; and continuously evaluating progress with grit. He stresses that without the final step of evaluation and adjustment—the "physics of progress"—no real advancement occurs regardless of effort or clarity. Furthermore, he addresses whether one should be hard on themselves or soft, suggesting an 80/20 balance where individuals primarily move toward positive goals but occasionally utilize negative impulses like fear to push through exhaustion. He warns that while pain is a powerful incentive with high amplitude, over-reliance on it becomes corrosive and damaging much like overheating in video games, so the optimal approach involves wielding both pleasure and pain tools thoughtfully based on one's baseline personality type. Finally, Bilyeu tackles self-perception by advising listeners to recognize they are "hopelessly average," a concept that paradoxically empowers them rather than diminishing them because it removes the burden of needing to be special or different. He argues that humans have evolved into adaptive apex predators and that the only belief that truly matters is knowing one will get better at any skill given sufficient time and energy, as skills possess utility in the world. By focusing on gaining abilities that others cannot do which are valued by society, individuals enter a virtuous cycle where their contributions lift others up, generating gratitude and joy that fuels further improvement. This mindset shift allows people to pursue goals they love even during failure, creating a magical formula for fulfillment where hard work serves oneself and others simultaneously, ultimately proving that training the brain is not just possible but essential for achieving legendary success in life.
Read the full video transcript
Everybody, welcome to another episode of
Impact Theory. Today, we're going to be
talking all about training your brain
for success. If you want to mentally
fortify yourself so that you can
accomplish whatever it is that you have
set your mind to despite the setbacks
that will happen from internal poor
messaging or external difficulties,
we're going to be talking about all of
that today. All right, without further
ado, first question.
Does a negative mindset have more
effects on mental health and the brain?
And does it get easier to control your
emotions if you try long enough? So,
first of all, yes, a negative mindset is
going to have an overall impact on your
mental health. So, anxiety is the
easiest one to talk about because I've
experienced it, but I think depression
is also going to be hugely affected by
what you allow yourself to repeat. So,
one core mechanism of the brain is to
understand that while we are a very
active species that's meant to go out
and explore and master our environment,
there's a secondary evolutionary force
pushing on us, which is that we also
want to conserve calories to make sure
that we survive
a famine. So, we have this dual
competing thing of wanting to go out and
do cool [ __ ] hence the big dreams, and
wanting to sit on the couch and eat a
bag of potato chips,
hence why we procrastinate, why we feel
lazy, and the
way that the brain as a physiological
organ has dealt with this dual impulse
challenge over evolutionary time frames
is that it's a process called
myelination. And what that does is it's
wrapping fatty tissue around neurons
that fire together at the same time
frequently. So, this is why they say
neurons that fire together wire
together. They are literally getting
optimized for the efficient transmission
of the signals across those synaptic
gaps. And the reason that they do this
is that it becomes easier from a caloric
perspective to do those things. So, now
you've made whatever you repeat, whether
it's something empowering or
disempowering, whether it's something
that makes you anxious or feel like you
can do anything, it's going to make
thinking those thoughts and feeling
those feelings easier from a caloric
perspective. It also begins to move it
into what's called the default mode
network. So, the default mode network is
responsible for
anything that we'll call automatic
thinking. If you've done something a
bazillion times, you don't think about
brushing your teeth, you just brush your
teeth. You don't think about driving to
work often times, certainly before the
pandemic, you just drive to work. And
there were times where you would show up
at work and be like, "Whoa, I almost
don't remember the journey getting
here." And the reason is that what ends
up happening is your cognition can be
put on to basically something else, so
you're thinking through daydreaming,
whatever, and the thing you do in a
repetitive way is just happening
automatically, super efficiently. And
it's a thing that happens to the brain
where you can scan somebody and go, "Up,
they're in the default mode network
right now." And if worry, anxiety,
panic, fear, stress, if that's what
you're doing all the time, then that's
what's going to be moved over, made
calorically easier to do, that by
default, that's where you go. And this
is where most people spend the majority
of their lives is living in that default
mode network of these emotions that
they've created, these very well-worn
paths to looping around over and over,
to feeling those feelings over and over.
And so, you can understand, since the
body responds to your
the mental states that you're constantly
in, that each of those mental states is
characterized by hormonal and
neurochemical states, and the body will
have different long-term consequences
based on what you're feeling. So, for
instance, if you are constantly stressed
or
constantly anxious, your cortisol levels
are extraordinarily high. Cortisol
levels begin to damage the um
the elasticity of your blood vessels.
It's one of the vectors of attack on
your body. And so, you don't want to
stay in these chronically elevated
levels because it deteriorates the um
integrity of the lining of your blood
vessels. And this is the kind of thing
that leads to stroke or coronary heart
disease. So, being incredibly thoughtful
not to loop on those things, which
doesn't mean that there aren't bad
things going on in your life, but it
does mean that when you allow yourself
to loop loop loop, that there is this
hormonal and chemical cascade as a
response to that that your body will
have negative consequences to or
positive consequences if you're in a
loving, calm state a lot, and that's the
thing that becomes the default mode
network. That becomes the easiest thing
for you to think, and you're in this
really calm and creative state a lot of
times, uh then you're going to prolong
your life. Um so, I I hesitate only to
say that because of course, there are
other extenuating circumstances like if
your diet is terrible, uh but you're in
that calm and creative state a lot, I
think you're still going to run into
issues. And quite honestly, if your diet
is messed up, then the odds of you being
able to stay in that calm and creative
state are very, very low because of the
communication that happens between your
brain and your guts. Getting into
dysbiosis is a whole 'nother thing. But
anyway, you want to be very careful the
things that you allow yourself to think.
Now, how do you train yourself to get
out of that
get out of a negative default mode
network and into a positive default mode
network. So, one is something called
pattern interrupting. This comes from
cognitive behavioral therapy. Uh it's
extraordinarily useful, and I highly
encourage you guys to get very deft at
with And this is simply not allowing
yourself to think certain thoughts. And
every time you catch yourself doing it
to pattern interrupt and you remind
yourself you don't do that. So, for
instance, one of the reasons that I
don't get overwhelmed is because I don't
allow myself to be overwhelmed. That
doesn't mean that I can carry an
infinite load. What it means is every
time I can feel that escalation, I can
feel like, "Oh my god, this is
overwhelming." I say to myself, "Ah,
you don't do overwhelm."
And saying that thought interrupts that
pattern and breaks me out of it, brings
my conscious control back in, right?
Victor Frankl, between stimulus and
response there is a gap. We want to mind
that gap. We want to get in there,
insert something like the statement, "I
don't do overwhelm," which then puts me
back into conscious control and I decide
what I want to insert in terms of the
emotion that I want to feel, which of
course is more calm, more relaxed, able
to handle more things.
Now, I also remind myself that doing
less is always an option. So, if there's
just too many things happening at once,
99 times out of 100, even if I'm really
in something busy and there's a lot
happening, if I feel overwhelmed coming
on, boom, pattern interrupt, I don't do
overwhelm, and then I'm going to sit
down, I'm going to deep breathe from my
belly,
and I'm going to slow things down.
And I'm going to let that stuff go,
and that's exactly how I'm actually able
to end up doing more because I don't let
that become a runaway process.
I pattern interrupt it. I breathe from
my diaphragm. I slow down. It doesn't
take long to reset,
to get yourself focused, and then
typically what I'll do at that point is
shift back into an aggressive mental and
emotional posture, which then helps me
push through anything that might
potentially feel overwhelming.
And that is the training. So, you're
doing that pattern interrupt. You're
doing the physiological things that you
need to do to shift your state, and then
you're inserting yourself back into that
gap, and you do that over and over and
over and over, never wasting time being
angry with yourself that you start to
feel overwhelmed, but instead being
proud of yourself that you do the
pattern interrupt, that you slow things
down.
And when you reinforce that behavior,
that's what begins to wire together. And
now over time, it becomes this very easy
loop that happens automatically, you
don't even think about it. When you
start to feel that sense of overwhelm,
you don't get lost in the overwhelm.
Boom, you stop, slow down, breathe,
insert the aggression in this case. I'm
just giving you an example from how I
deal with it, but whatever you're going
to do to deal with it.
I do something exactly uh similar to
that for anxiety. I start to feel the
anxiety build up. I'm not going to allow
that to become this runaway process. I'm
going to slow down. It happens again
that I'm going to breathe from my
diaphragm.
I'm going to relax. I'm going to close
my eyes. I'm going to start some sort of
visualization of things going well
instead of going wrong. You only get
anxious
when you imagine things going wrong. So
now I'm going to force myself to imagine
them going well.
I'm going to breathe from my diaphragm
doing the physiological work of making
sure I'm shifting state. And just do
that over and over and over.
I hope you guys enjoy the episode
brought to you by our sponsor Blinkist.
Go to blinkist.com/impacttheory
to get 25% off a Blinkist premium
membership and a 7-day free trial. All
right, enjoy the episode. Let me ask you
a question. Do you know the difference
between someone who crushes big goals in
their life year in and year out and
someone who can't seem to get ahead?
What is up, my friends? Tom Bilyeu here.
In my opinion, there are seven
strategies that you must use in order to
achieve any goal. The more of them that
you can take action on, the greater the
chance that you'll achieve your goal. I
say that the difference between someone
who is an overachiever and someone who
fails to hit their goals is that the
overachiever does everything they can
possibly do to be successful. I said a
second ago that there are seven
strategies you must use to hit any goal.
I'll be teaching them later this month
on a live workshop called how to make
any goal stick. Great news is it's a
process, it can be taught, and you can
deploy it in your own life. You can
register for this workshop by going to
this link. I'll tell you though right
now quickly what they are. First,
extreme clarity and focus. The average
person fails to achieve their goals not
because they didn't put in effort, but
because they don't actually know what it
is that they're trying to accomplish.
They're not focused on exactly what they
want. Second, massive excitement and
motivation. There are two things that
motivate us, pleasure and pain. Most
people don't properly leverage pain and
negative emotions, which means that
they're only half as motivated as they
could be or at least they're only using
half of the tools of somebody else that
finds their way to success. Third is
desire.
Fourth is massive pressure, and this
goes back to that idea of negative
emotions. If you use it the right way,
fear of failure can actually be a very
useful thing. Fifth, coming up with the
right strategy. Sixth, avoiding the trap
of overthinking rather than taking fast,
aggressive action. And finally,
evaluating your progress, building grit,
and adjusting your course. That loop is
critical in fact. That last part is what
I call the physics of progress. If you
fail to do that, you will never make
progress. All right, these are the seven
steps that I'm going to walk through in
much greater detail on my live workshop,
how to make any goal stick. So, go to
the link on your screen or click the
button below to register. All right, my
friend, I will see you soon. Take care
and be legendary. Peace.
Next, hi Tom.
I I
that you're going to like this. Do you
know what the best way would be to
accelerate the electrical neural
connections in my brain so I can learn
faster, change habits, and improve
exponentially in my life working with
the neuroplasticity that you know so
well. Thank you. Okay, so this is a game
of repetition and understanding that for
the reasons that I just laid in the
previous question, it just comes down to
what you repeat. Whatever you repeat,
then you're going to get better at that
thing. Better meaning more efficient
from a brain wiring standpoint. It gets
easier to do. And so as you think about
trying to learn faster, a lot of this is
going to be practice learning. You're
going to be learning as much as you can
and one, you're going to lay down those
neural pathways, but two, and maybe more
importantly, is you are going to learn
tips and tricks along the way that will
optimize for exactly you. So I'm giving
you all the things that work for me. I
think it'll probably work 80 to 85%
exactly the same for you, but there's
that 15% that's going to be optimized
just for you. Where you're like, you
know what? That thing, like I'll give
you an example from my own life, box
breathing.
So to meditate,
people will typically tell you to
breathe in four equal parts. I found
that that didn't work for me. So I found
by optimizing for the pleasure cycle of
those four parts of the breath cycle
that it worked perfectly. So it was like
85% of it was just sitting down,
meditating, understanding how to come
back to the thought, understanding how
to breathe from my diaphragm, all that.
That was by far all of the heavy
lifting, but then that little tweak at
the end made a big difference. And so by
practicing learning, by repeating
learning, by doing it over and over, by
finding out do you do better when you're
reading a physical book? Do you do
better when you're listening to audio?
Do you do better on YouTube videos? Do
you do better on audiobooks? Do you do
better when you can take physical notes?
Do you do better notes handwritten or
typed? All of these things. So it's It's
all the same stuff,
but there are going to be little nuances
that are different for you. And so
getting in there and doing them over and
over and over, that's going to be the
key to learning faster, increasing the
speed, and then just overall getting
better at that by doing those things
over and over and over so that you get
the hardwiring that you're looking for.
Next. Is it possible to train your brain
to control dopamine addiction,
especially with things like YouTube,
games, and NFTs that are so
all-consuming and addictive? How can you
redirect your brain to focus on your
goals? All right, let's talk about time
management. So, I am very grateful that
while I have a very obsessive
personality, I don't have an addictive
personality. And what that means is that
I find it relatively straightforward to
create rules in my life.
And I highly encourage anybody to do
this, whether you have an addictive or
an obsessive personality or anything
else, to create bright lines in your
life. Rules that you simply don't
violate. That way there's no question,
like imagine if you say something like
This is actually true from my childhood.
My mom would say, I don't remember the
exact number, but it was something like
13. We could have 13 Doritos.
So, you're eating your 13 Doritos, but
like Dorito number nine was kind of
broken. So, that doesn't really count as
a full Dorito. But then the next one
maybe only has a tiny bit of a corner
missing. So, you take that one, you're
like, "Well, they were both broken." And
so, you end up eating, you know, the
equivalent of more. Or maybe you lost
count, and so you don't want to cheat
yourself, of course. So, you know, at
number six, maybe you start the count
over. So, there are all these ways where
you end up intaking more than you mean
to. Versus saying, "I only eat Doritos
on a Saturday."
That way, if it isn't Saturday, I'm not
eating Doritos. And then if you find,
well, what I end up doing is on Friday
night, I stay awake until 12:01 so I can
eat Doritos, go to bed, wake up, eat
more Doritos. If that isn't the outcome
that you want, then you say, "Cool.
I don't eat Doritos until I've woken up
on a Saturday morning after, you know,
at least 7 hours of being in bed.
Whatever you need to do to make sure
that you're not getting up in the middle
of the night or only sleeping 4 hours
because you're so excited to go eat.
These are sadly all real things from my
past. And so, figuring out all of those
things and understanding how you have to
refine your rules so that you can be
very clear about what you do and what
you don't do. Once you do that, now you
can start breaking that dopamine loop
that people can get into. So, one area
that I do find that I get into it and I
have to be really thoughtful about this
is this weird loop around checking uh
WhatsApp, checking uh Twitter, checking
my text messages, if I'm moving
something forward in the business. So, I
never do it just like in my personal
life, but there were times I'm trying to
move something forward in my business. I
need to see what the team is doing. Some
people on the team communicate via
WhatsApp, some for text, and then on
Twitter if I'm trying to promote
something. And so, I'll get in this loop
of just like going, going, going, going,
going, and each thing leads to the next
and, you know,
getting to sort of inbox zero on
WhatsApp triggers me to go get to inbox
zero on my text messages, triggers me to
go get to inbox zero on Twitter,
triggers me to go back to WhatsApp, to
text, and and I get in this weird crazy
loop. And so, what I do to end up
breaking that cycle, one, becoming aware
of it is hugely important in
understanding how that dopamine cycle
works. And then two, to make sure that I
put confines around it even if I have to
set an alarm. Normally, I don't because
my day is so busy
that I've got to get onto the next
thing. But, recognizing, okay, this is
something that I'm prone to and that I
need to have a hard stop because if I
don't have a hard stop, then I know that
I'll end up in this loop and it begins
to not feel good. Like at first, it
feels like I'm making progress, I'm
pushing things forward, and then at some
point it begins to start to feel really
uncomfortable. And like that I have a
compulsion. I have to check again. I
have to go back. And so, recognizing
that that's a thing, and then
instituting rules. So, for instance, I
don't care about inbox zero. I care
about moving a project forward. I care
very much about time management. I care
very much about having my priorities in
order and going down my list of
priorities. And once that thing is no
longer a priority, even if I see that a
notification comes in, now there's a
message waiting or five messages waiting
or 10 messages waiting. I train myself
that I'm not even going to look at that.
I know that there are people waiting for
a response. I've already moved it
forward as much as makes sense given my
time allocation, given my priorities,
and therefore I'm going to be completely
fine with that. And so, one thing I've
done is
on almost everything. It's not on
everything everything, but on almost
everything I've turned off all visible
notifications. So, that if you were to
pick up my phone, it looks like I have
nothing waiting for me. There's nothing
in my email, nothing in my text,
nothing.
Um
but there are. But I force it so that I
have to go in to check it. So, there
aren't these little things dripping on
my mind. So, being very careful about
doing that. And then things that are
just pure fun, like games or NFTs or
something like that, again, it's it's
knowing that I'm going to allow myself
to spend this much time. So, for
instance, having a bedtime that you
stick to is incredibly important. I'd be
lying if I said that NFTs haven't led me
beyond my bedtime a few times. Um but I
really do try to be religious. So, if
once or twice out of the week I end up
going, say, 20 minutes over my bedtime,
I'm okay with that. We'll call that a
margin of error. Um but if it started to
be a problem, then I would put bright
lines and I would say something like uh
I cannot stay up past my bedtime more
than twice in a 7-day period. And you do
something like that.
And again, bright lines are incredibly
effective at making sure that you don't
end up in a behavior pattern that you
don't want to be in.
All right. And then go look at Andrew
Huberman and his work on dopamine and
all the things that he's discussing. Uh
it's really powerful to understand how
dopamine works and that it isn't
actually rewarding you for getting the
thing, it's rewarding desire. So,
dopamine is the anticipatory
neurochemical that feels good. It's
exciting to want something, to pursue
something. And so, once you understand
that dopamine is actually triggering the
desire to pursue it, then you're more
likely to be able to break that pattern
cuz you realize that doing whatever
behavior, playing the games, looking at
NFTs, all of that, it's never going to
satisfy it. You're never going to be
like, "Oh, cool. Now I've had my fill
and I can go stop." Dopamine is
specifically making you want to do more
of something, to pursue it, to go after
it, to repeat that behavior. So, be very
thoughtful about that.
Do you ever just want to be a better
version of yourself, a more confident,
knowledgeable you? The fastest way to do
it is to get learning. My whole
obsession is what I call ABL, always be
learning. Learning about a new topic or
skill, revisiting one you learned about
in the past, or getting up to speed on
something everyone is talking about
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horizons, but also boost your
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right, guys, take care and be legendary.
What's up, everybody? Tom Bilyeu here.
Quick question for you. How many times
have you sat down in your life to write
out a list of goals and said to
yourself, "For real this time, I'm going
to make every single one of these happen
and I will not quit." If you're like
most people, you set a lot of goals, but
you don't achieve all of them. In fact,
you may not have achieved any of them.
The great news is I don't care if you
are the highest achiever in the world or
if 2021 has beaten you down hard. What I
know for a fact is that humans are wired
to adapt and no matter how difficult the
previous year or years have been, you
can find your path to fulfillment in
achieving your goals. Look, my friend,
trust me, learning how to stick to your
goals and achieve them again and again
is a skill and you can learn it. You can
master it and when you do, it will serve
you for life. Great news is it's a
process like anything else. 2021 has
been hard for a lot of people, so I'm
going to be going live later this month
to host a workshop on exactly how to run
that process called how to make any goal
stick. Now, you can go to this link or
click the button on your screen and get
free access to this live training. And
when you register, I'll send you a bonus
class from Impact Theory University to
get you started. All right, see you soon
over at the live workshop. And until
then, my friend, be legendary. Take
care.
Next. Should you be hard on yourself or
soft on yourself? How can you tell if
someone's brain is geared towards
hearing negative affirmations or needs
negative persuasion to get things done?
Case in point, were you, Tom, use a
negative scenario to get you through
your workouts. Thank you. Okay, so
there's moving towards and there's
moving away. And once you understand
what your baseline personality is, are
you more likely to move towards
something or more likely to move away
from something? I'm a move towards kind
of person. So, the vast majority of my
life is spent moving towards the things
that excite me. Call it 80%. And then
20% of the time, I find that moving away
from something is very powerful. And
what the person asking the question is
referring to in the gym because I hated
it so much and it was so exhausting and
felt like such a waste of time, I had to
think about protecting my wife. And that
if I wasn't able to get strong and not
be able to protect my wife that
something bad might happen to her. And
so, that was a real motivation. But if
I'm honest, as I get into the nuance of
that, it was really the thing that I
would imagine was just [ __ ] ruining
the person trying to get after my wife.
And so, that it was about me winning in
that scenario, being able to dismantle
them. And
even that was like a move towards. It
was moving towards getting stronger. But
there's no doubt that there was some
negative impulse there. But it's
figuring out from yourself what
motivates you, what scenarios as you
imagine them, walk through them, push
you to do more. And then recognizing
that nature has only given us two
things, pleasure and pain. And so, the
more you can optimize them both, the
better. Now, part of the optimization
cycle of pleasure is understanding that
when you think about the beautiful
things, the pleasurable things, that you
want to bring into this world, that you
could soak there. You could spend all of
your time there, and it would feel
wonderful.
The negative stuff, I think is actually
higher in amplitude in its ability to
incentivize behavior,
but is corrosive. And so, um
There are video game references coming
to mind. There is a gun in Destiny 2,
and the longer you use it, the more it
overheats, and it will actually end up
damaging you as you use the gun. And so,
you have to be careful not to use it too
much because it starts taking away your
own life. So, that's negative energy all
day. So, as you are using that negative
energy, it works at first and gives you
this real boost.
Then, if you stay there too long, it
begins to become a problem, both
physiologically and just from a is it
fun living my life perspective. So, you
want to be really thoughtful. I find
that an 80/20 balance is roughly right.
Find the right balance for you. I would
be startled if it was ever more than
20%. Um but, in my darkest times, where
I am just exhausted and cannot bear the
thought of going on any longer,
to get that like reinvigoration,
I need only think about the people that
are waiting for me to fail. And that
gives me the juice that I need, but I
try not to spend a lot of time thinking
about that. So,
be thoughtful in your own life, but both
are powerful, and I would learn how to
wield both tools.
All right.
Love your content.
How do you stay up and positive when you
keep getting kicked down, things get
worse, and before you know it, uh you're
buried neck deep and completely lost as
to what to do. How do you get back to
center and beyond? Can you break down
step-by-step how to train your brain to
move past how you see yourself?
Yes, I can. So, here is how to think
about
yourself.
Number one,
recognize that you are hopelessly
average.
That way you don't have to think of
yourself as special. Because that
negative voice in your head is going to
constantly tell you that you're not
special. So, now just admit you're
average. And given the distribution
curve, the odds of you being average are
extraordinarily high. So, you're
average. You meet what I call minimum
requirements. So, if you're asking this
question, you were smart enough to do
all of the amazing things you want to do
in your life. You may not be the best in
the world at them, but you'll be able to
do extraordinary things that are going
to dazzle yourself and other people. So,
step one, recognize that you are
average. Step two, recognize that you're
an average human. And the average human
has become the apex predator of all apex
predators because of one simple
principle. It is not the strongest of
the species that survive, nor the most
intelligent, but rather the most
adaptive to change. As the average
human, you are the most adaptive
creature the world has ever seen. So,
now even being an average
adapter, you're going to be able to do
things that are incredible. It's what I
call the only belief that matters. The
only belief that matters is that if you
put time and energy into getting better
at something, you will get better.
The second part of this idea is that
skills have utility. So, you're putting
time and energy into gaining skills, and
those skills let you do something in the
world that other people can't do. When
you can do something in the world that
other people can't do, that the world
values, you will always be able to make
a living.
If you get good at something that the
world values that other people can't do,
and you love it, now all of the sudden
you're optimizing for a life that fills
you with joy, and if you're optimizing
for something that the world values that
other people can't do, that you love,
and it serves other people as well, you
now have the magic formula for
fulfillment. And the harder you work to
gain that set of skills that serve
yourself and others, you will begin
getting feedback from the world because
they value it. And you're out there
doing something that lifts them up, so
you're lifting them up in a way that
they recognize and value, and inevitably
they're going to thank you for doing
that thing. And that makes you feel
good, which makes you want to go get
better at that thing. And so now you go
gain more skills in this thing that was
hard that the world values that you're
getting better at than other people, and
doing things other people can't do, and
elevating people in ways that other
people can't elevate them. They're
thanking you for that, and now you're in
a virtuous cycle. And so that was the
breakthrough for me was recognizing I
did not need to believe that I was
different or special because I was
having a very hard time doing that. Life
was showing me that that just wasn't
true, that there were so many people
that were better than me. And so dealing
with that was emotionally very difficult
in the beginning. So that big first step
was recognizing, "Oh, I'm just
hopelessly average, but that's okay. I'm
the hopelessly average adaptation
machine." And now it's a question of
what are my goals? What do I love doing?
What do I love doing even when I'm
failing? Even when it's really
difficult? And as long as I'm doing
something that I find exciting, okay, it
has to be fun, it's got to be exciting,
and it elevates other people, now the
harder I work at that thing the better
it is for everybody involved, and it
becomes this really magical thing.
So, that is my advice to you, my friend.
Do that and all will be well. All right,
guys. That's a whole bunch of things
that I recommend to all of you and I
hope that you guys will embark upon this
journey of training your mind for
success because trust me, it actually
does work. And speaking of things that
work, if you haven't already, be sure to
subscribe. And until next time, my
friends, be legendary. Take care. Peace.