The Strangest Norms You'll Only Find In America - Sam Morril (4K)

this is delicious you haven't decided whether I know I don't like it I don't think but you keep drinking it I keep drinking it God damn it I keep drink and I'm like I don't think I like it but I've had like 10 sips and I'm like maybe I do I don't how long do it take to get accustomed to New York City I mean I don't know cuz I've lived you my whole life but you picked like the worst strip this is a really bad block I mean it's like all the people just selling fake bags who the [ __ ] thinks these are real bags I mean if you're a tourist are you're not an like you're like oh yeah the guy who was in in 3 days and smells like Bo that's a that's a real Louis Vuitton Stocker retailer of come on who's luxury items yeah just buy a [ __ ] bag that's cheap that's actually not going to break the second you buy it I don't know I this place feels really hard to adjust to as someone who's not from here yeah I feel like a a medieval Country Bumpkin going to the big city or something to have to speak to the baron or whatever and I come in I'm like just overloaded it's so loud noisy everything smells and then it's also energizing but yeah it's just it's odd to adjust to and people that live here are just like it's just what life is that's exactly my point I can't drive but I can tell you which subway gets you to like Brooklyn I'm you I can't really can't I can drive but I'm bad so you have your license but I it was a b here's what happened I I took three tests I failed the first two drivers tests I passed the third one because uh I got in the car and I was like please don't fail me I'm terrible and the and the instructor the instructor laughed and then I hit a cone and she was like all right you you got it took sympathy on you yeah and but then it was like because of that I don't drive out of like respect because I know it's a [ __ ] license oh okay so I like never drive probably for the best yeah I I did it the other day but it was like six blocks Jesus Christ yeah I well another thing do people raise children here yeah because never SE well I don't know I just never they don't look like they're going to school why do they go to school Underground like Subterranean children kindergarten area you see the little kids with the rolly bags and the going yeah they look like businessmen it's great they're already jaded they're already like [ __ ] I got to go to school today this is terrible yeah oh [ __ ] got a spelling test yeah they're miserable my teachers being a dick yeah dude no they're uh they kids I was a kid here I mean we grew up here it's but it's definitely an energy like I when people are like this City's terrible I'm like I can't argue with you there's a lot of problems like the amount of I feel like every building's always falling apart there's always like people drilling you just walk around there's people just drilling on the side of buildings to make sure loose bricks don't fall out and land on someone kidding yeah it's called section 11 law so they will have to drill on the side of your build so if you're like it could be like we could be doing this podcast and there could be a guy just like right outside the window just like Drilling and what's he doing he's making sure the bricks don't fall out by weakening the Bricks by checking I don't know enough about it but I know I know that's what they're doing yeah I think I've heard you describe New York City as you're in a constant state of irritation but you're always grateful yeah it's well that's life it's like every day for me is like I'll bump a stranger and I'll be like what the I [ __ ] I hope this guy dies for bumping me but then like I go to bed every night and I'm like good day that's like my energy it's like I'm angry but I'm I am grateful yeah I I yeah this city is a constant state of irritation but then like sometimes I think sometimes I think life is that way but then maybe it's just cuz I'm a New Yorker but I travel so much for work that like you know I'm an airport after airport so travel is is a constant state of irritation I'm always frustrated what about when you go you go to Montana or whatever and you just this down regulation and you hear these birds I've heard stories about people that live in cities not being used to silence is that is that a real thing have you ever have put on like a noise maker I put on like white noise I can't sleep with just well also though if you're in a hotel like I need the like just the sounds of the couple next door arguing or whatever the housekeeper they're just having a conversation from one room to the other and you're like do you think this is a good idea at 8:30 in the morning but but on top of that you also need this sort of ambient volume because of I need something but is that that so you don't need that that's a New York thing yeah okay yeah not at all at all needed I need pretty wild to think but I guess it's just whatever you get used to but yeah man I uh coming here the the energy is fantastic but living here must be a trip must be an absolute trip yeah I guess I'm I'm away enough to be grateful I'm away enough to like you know but then you always no matter where you live you're excited to go home I think correct you know I think of that movie up in the air all the time that Clooney movie where he's just always just staring at the the flights and you're like well that's the life of a comedian so whenever I land I'm just like [ __ ] yes and then you get home and it's miserable but you're like but this is my misery you know this is the this is the misery I'm comfortable with Whitney uh taught me something where she said that uh in order for art to imitate life you have to live a life and kind of brought on why uh comedians uh and other artists if they start to get more successful they start to spend more time on the road and then the only things that they have to talk about are airports and dinners backstages and stuff because that's their life is just infused with that so yeah you don't want to be that comedian where after every show A Guy Walks Like A guy came up to me after a show and he said and like that's your whole act and you're like no you got to have like real stories yeah I speaking of Montana I went to my first PBR professional bull riding I thought that was PS blue rib Ribbon or whatever the beer I went to a I went to a professional bull riding thing have you ever been to one of those I hear it's fun dude it's wild so my favorite part of the whole thing the Bulls themselves have walkout songs they don't pick them uh I don't know I mean it was it's all associated with and they've got highlight reels of like their best rides ever and there the you know this bull trampling on a Brazilian man and this it's like he hasn't been ridden in four years and this thing comes out and it's just super but it's got when it first comes out it's fully dolled up and it's got like flowers around it then the next time it comes out it's got this they tie this stuff under its stomach that irritates it that's why it keeps doing the Bucking thing got this stuff tied underneath it and uh yeah there's always like a little Brazilian dude on the top of them and uh they [ __ ] him up and then they go off are the guys are the guys little in that or they a little bigger cuz the the horse racing there the jockeys are tiny mixed bag a lot of the guys seemed like muscular but pretty pretty short I'm going to guess being tall would be a disadvantage in that cuz he's going to get ragged around I've done him in the bars the the balls and I don't last same thing yeah and you you would struggle so yeah I mean your pivot if the comedy thing doesn't work out pivoting into PBR might not be a good idea one thing that I really loved there's a a guy like a compare that's also a clown had full sort of face makeup on but a lot of your experience is mediated through this one dude CU he's explaining what's going on they only need to stay on the bows for eight seconds and most of them don't so it's a 40 8C periods punctuated with minute and a half long breaks while this bull is just trotting around round and there's a dude with a lasso trying to get it and [ __ ] it off into the pen so that the next guy can come out that's that's that's a worst job I think the guy who has to bring the ball back in with the lasso yeah yeah I they seem to chill out for it depends on how well disciplined the balls are but yeah I uh the one that I did at Big Sky guy X Navy SE Montana yeah it was sweet yeah guy jumps out of a helicopter flying an America flag behind him while a Angelic 12-year-old sings the national anthem fireworks went off it's like this is some America this is some real Kevin spy tried to ride the 12-year-old yes yes he only lasted eight seconds he didn't go that young that's not fair it wasn't in Hollywood no everyone was of age I have a Kevin spy joke in my act right now so I always think I have a joke about like I was watching a Hitler dock with my girlfriend and and she goes you know who'd be a good Hitler is Kevin spacy and I'm like oh yeah I could see that and she goes but he can't because canceled and I'm like he can't play Hitler that would be that doesn't seem fair well imagine imagine the pipeline of cancelled actors to unspeakable roles yeah but he can't for what he did isn't Hitler he's not shittier than Hitler right that's true did you see the one of the actors from Friends retrospectively sort of canceled the show about a lack of diversity he was that was that was Adam Goldberg that was a guy who was on like one episode right he's not one of the actor from Friends really though somebody that was once in friends said that it wasn't sufficient look you can have revisionist history right you could be like we they it was a white [ __ ] show it was a very white I was never into the friends but like a lot of those shows of that era were very white like Seinfeld was very white you know he didn't he say something about how Italians can play Jews but Jews can't play Italians I think he said that in the same yeah so there's this weird one I think we could I think Jews can my friend uh my buddy's a Jewish actor he's played in Italian uhhuh I think Jews can play Italians for sure I think I think it works both ways that was one of his complaints that he can't play maybe he's not a cool enough Jew maybe he's not tanned enough maybe Jew with a tan equals Italian is that the way that it works I think no they work CU they both have Mo they both have overbearing mothers Jews and Italians we can both tap into the same [ __ ] overbearing mother but then like Jew with the overbearing mother is like like Gloria soprano is a very different mom than my mom but my mom was my mom was it was more like anxiety than aggression than aggression yeah right okay like Gloria soprano [ __ ] hated her son she was it was all anger and resentment my mom is more just like ah like don't do this like my dad sent me a [ __ ] email my dad sent me an email about an apple juice recall the other day and I was like I'm 38 you think you think I'm you think I'm pounding apple juice like those days those days are over but that's how much they worry that's my like that's the Jewish my mom true story we were walking on the street once and I saw a dead pigeon and I go GH dead bird and my mom goes don't touch it and I was like what do you think happens when I'm not around Mom I'm not going to touch the [ __ ] bird how old are you at this point it's like five years ago six years ago she's like she worries so much dude she always on the road she's like don't don't drink and I'm like I'm going to I'm an adult I've made my own decisions what age do you think your mother sees you as I think they always see you as as a kid you know I think they can shake that you get to I don't have kids so I don't know maybe3 and they just sort of tap out at that and you've got this man in front of you with a beard who's on stage but it just happens to be your 12year old son my mom's so bummed by some of my bits like they here's the thing they insist on coming to shows and then I see her like horrified look in the crowd they for some reason they're always sat with an eyesight like I had a joke I had this long bit about going to my uh it's like an old bit of mine but I would go I went to this girl's house cuz she was like come over and I'm going to give you a [ __ ] basically and I was like I'm there and what happened was I go and while she's blowing me the door swings open and a guy was there and he like they set me up basically and I it's a long bit but I remember looking at I just turn to the crowd I see my mom's face and she's doing this and I'm like you want it to come this is a tap what you expect yeah and but she's like I'm your mother and then she asked me like is that a real story and I was like I could lie to you but uh yes it's all real it's all real and she was is not happy but you know I try to tell her like look who's considered the greatest comic ever is Richard prior and I'm sure his mom want to love some of his [ __ ] and my mom said well she his mom was a prostitute I was like I still don't think she wants to hear about her son lighting himself on fire free basing I think you're still a mom like some of the [ __ ] you talk about on stage is is regret and and you kind of that's funny kind of like hearing a a public therapy session solo therapy session yeah regularly like just pulling out all of the stuff that you wish that your son wouldn't talk about anymore but therapy very much hone cuz some Comics make the mistake of being like I'm just you know I'm figuring some [ __ ] out up here and I'm like yeah the crowd doesn't give a [ __ ] that's you pay a therapist for that you know but you know if if I just tell a story I went to a girl's house and she blew me that's not funny that's bragging but if I tell a story about going to a girl's house and I'm scared for my life because I was like what the [ __ ] is a guy coming in here for why you you know that's funny CU it's weird and uncomfortable and obviously that not just that is funny the whole story is what made it funny but you know you we're not supposed to be winners in the end Comics aren't supposed to win in the end of the story one of my friends Michael malice said he wouldn't be able to get away with half of the stuff that he can if he was taller than 56 it's 56 and I kind of get it the sense that it's not too dissimilar with that as well that if you come off as too sort of perfect or braggadocious it's just not that likable who's the most famous insult comic ever Don Rickles look at him he looks like a hippopotamus you know I mean if he's just like gorgeous guy on stage ripping on people he'd be like this guy's an [ __ ] Jimmy car's an interesting one when it comes to that yeah cuz Jimmy's kind Jimmy's not an insult comic Jimmy's a oneliner comic who's just really good with off the cuff like Heckler moments that's true that is true Jimmy's Jimmy's like Posh on stage and he's you know distinguished he's distinguished but that's that's who he is offstage too you know I've never not seen him in a suit went for breakfast Austin Texas 95 degree morning walk suit yeah it's weird yeah uh speaking of relationships Spanish supermarket Shoppers use pineapples to search for love in a surprising new craze have you seen this no let me tell you a social media Trend in Spain where people are encouraged to seek out prospective Partners in supermarkets with the help of pineapples has led to some chaotic it makes your [ __ ] taste better is that why I mean I don't get it I haven't even got into the oh so I I jumped the gun there in the city of bilau Northern Spain police were reportedly called by workers after a flash mob of hopeful singles passed packed a merad donor store and overwhelmed it Singletons have been drawn to the branches of the supermarket chain where it is claimed that they can find romance if they visit between 7 and 8:00 p.m. and put a pineapple upside down in their trolley people are encouraged to go to the wine aisle to find others with the same fruit in the same position if they like someone they bump their trolley against theirs indicating they're interested in chatting to them if the feeling is mutual they can bump back or just start talking according to the spanish-based English language News website Olive press the Spanish are overco complicating this how how about just going up to someone and saying hey I like you no you have this this beautiful dance of upside down fruit and and little carriages that it go is that not so how did you and Mom meet oh in the wine aisle of I don't think the pineapple story great either you think the pineapple I flipped the pineapple I think your kid's going to be like you're an upside down fruit dad the hell I don't I think this stuff is so complicated especially when you have all these apps to get laid on just go on one of the apps I mean I know it's not a great story but like have some fun it's quicker yeah what do you make of the sort of you in a relationship yeah from the outside perceiving it what do you make of sort of the modern state of of dating well I sure as [ __ ] miss those day naap days those were fun I mean it's it's it's Relentless I mean here's the thing The Grass Is Always Greener so I'm happy my relationship but I also like I'm like oh man that was awesome that was you could just get laid like that you could be a loser and still just be putting up numbers because it's just you know you see people just on the street like you know and you're like holy [ __ ] this is like like social media is addictive this is like the only downside is really you are pictures aren't everything right like you meet someone in person there's an energy you pick up on and it's like it's pictures don't M you can't you don't really you know count for voice and then they have that voice feature but that always feels weird you know to send a voice note to somebody that you've never met it's creep we a dick pick exclusively the reason of trying to get someone to think that you're cool or sexy and then how many times you re-record it or change the tone of your voice in to be more sultry than you actually are I know I've never used the voice note message are you single I am and do you are you are you cleaning up Rya right now i' spend a little bit of time on Rya but uh even that's it just feels like Pokemon trading card game but virtual and it's like well you've got it the admin of being single is so [ __ ] arduous dude like they you if you've spent all day working and sending emails backwards and forwards then going into your private life and go oh you better deal with the dating admin that doesn't exactly feel like a I don't know a fulfilling way to spend an evening yeah and you get caught up in the text and you have multiple and then you have the dates and they get repetitive and boring and I think those apps are shallow CU you're leading with the pictures so you're going with who you find most attractive more than most interesting a lot of the time and then you're on the date and you're like this [ __ ] this chick sucks pry yeah this is I don't care at all you're coming from like you know podcast therapy then you go on a date you're like I got to carry this [ __ ] too I got to bring the heat on the date the hell I'm tired well that's uh I think that's definitely a byproduct of growing up that getting a little bit older as a guy that girls that are pretty but not that interesting like I can't do this I can't I you're tired I can't do this I can't do it doesn't really matter how pretty you are because it's mind to me yeah if there's nothing if there's nothing else that's why mean everyone wants to meet in person but the apps are so addictive but yeah meeting in person's better always because you get to know somebody I've a couple relations I've been in we kind of got to know each other over FaceTime because it was just someone I kind of knew a little bit before and they lived in another state so we talk on FaceTime so I I really got to know them before we even had sex which I was like holy [ __ ] this is so different than what I'm accustomed to but that maybe that's why I did just like my grandfather did yeah but I mean I mean I jacked off on FaceTime to him a few times but you know I didn't I didn't I it was wholesome it's uh it's strange to think about the like I think that there's a a market for a dating app that's just video messages so you don't have a profile you don't have anything else and you just get to see a video video message backward and forward because within the space of 60 seconds you can work out whether or not this person is someone that you're bothered about it's not just the voice note thing you right within 2 minutes of being on your date you go ah should have bailed out that's that's why the the dinner first date is a terrible move cuz if you're not vibing with the person locked in for I'll have this appetizer this main course we're sticking around for dessert and you're like [ __ ] yep I already don't like you yeah but uh no you got to do drinks or coffee whatever you do but walking date is highly recommended apparently that's thing yeah because you side by side and that means that you there's less sort of intensity like this and also you can get away with a 15minute you know 30 minute we'll just test the water but then I wonder whether you do seem cheap though if you're like we should take a walk and she's like are you homeless why the [ __ ] are we walking you know I don't know yeah that is true uh I do I do wonder whether the subtext of going for a walking date is I'm really unsure about whether or not I can deal with spending more than 20 minutes around you so let's do something that I can oh I I must I I have to get a grapefruit or two from the supermarket I'll see you later on you know what I mean got get a pineapp flip it upside down find [ __ ] Spain with it yeah yeah we'll get back to talking to Sam in one minute but first I need to tell you about ag1 over the span of about a year I tried pretty much every Green string that I could find trying to work out which one was best and I came across ag1 and have stuck with it for over three years because it is the most comprehensive highly tested and rigorously formulated on the market a1's formulation is built to improve your health not just when you take it for a week but when you take this every single day for years and that is why I've stuck with it since 200 10 they've improved their formula 52 times in the pursuit of making the best foundational nutrition supplement possible through high quality ingredients and rigorous standards there's a 90-day moneyb guarantee so you can buy it completely risk-free use it every single day for three months and if you do not like it they'll just give you your money back so if you want to replace your multivitamin and more start with ag1 right now you can get a Year's free Supply vitamin D3 and K2 plus five free ag1 travel packs and that 90-day money back guarantee by going to the link in the description below or heading to drink a1.com slod wisdom that's drink a1.com slod wisdom another new story that I noticed this week Americans with a passport yeah in 1990 4% had a passport and now still less than 60% do so it's like but 4% in 4% in 1990 that's crazy yeah I don't know I don't know whether it's the fact that it's such a big country that you basically have 50 countries inside of one continent so people don't feel the need to travel but uh it's kind of not surprising that America sees itself as the center of the world given that most people for most people who live here it is the center of the world I don't know how many people have ever traveled even the ones with a passport you would assume that at least 50% has never left this country yeah which is pretty wild well that is pretty uh look I I I love America it's always going to I'm always going to live in New York but uh that is that's 4% is kind of a sad number I mean don't don't you want to get out of here I guess you know some people have stuff keeping them back it's it's expensive to travel but [ __ ] man that's a there's an awful lot of world outside of 50 states yeah dude I mean I guess it also depends what state you're in right because if you're in Texas Mexico's pretty easy if you're up north Canada's pretty easy but yeah [ __ ] what do what is your favorite place to travel uh I love Italy it I've never been I I tried to I'm doing a Euro tour and I tried to add it but it could I couldn't add Germany and Italy to this one and there two that I've never been to and I really want to go so good I went to Venice for the first time a couple of weeks ago my thing is history and culture and tours I want some dusty 55-year-old ex academic woman to who knows all of the history of a place with big jugs with big jugs to slap a headset on and walk me around telling me unpr ible surnames of an architect that's I could spend the rest of my life doing that and Venice was just obscene these tiny little streets that are not that much wider than you are rickety buildings all the buildings are held up by bits of wood so they don't fall over because the grounds shifting below that I it's crazy I was I was in love so that was awesome Florence kind of similar but less water awesome and then Rome similar but bigger so yeah my girlfriend was born in Rome she she grew up in America but she's born in Rome and she's you know her mother's Italian so she has this inred the Italian Jewish connection there we go you can make it work we make it work yeah I I love I don't know for some reason Italian I mean mob movies were such a thing for me growing up because my brother was obsessed with Good Fellas and Godfather's like this iconic American movie so there was this it sucks that I'm reducing to telling culture to mob movies for this point the synthesis it's pizza and mob movies yeah but Pizza is also very important to me so we had a problem so this this drink thing that we made we uh and I love necron so uhhuh we tried to recreate in the US I've heard a rumor that the same problem we encountered which was the hardness of the water has got something to do with why is it pizza or pastries or something P Pizza that's New Yorkers will we will tell you your water is not good enough is it true is that legit I don't know I I've heard people say it's not true I mean look they've got they figured I've had good pizza in La I can't be just you know because of the water yeah but New York yeah we have good we have good water here for sure I mean you and I should go to Flynn Michigan and try the pizza out then we got to figure it out we got to crack it it's got a lead lined crust on the outside I'm like I'd still try it what do you're a big Sports guy yeah what do football fans think about the Kelsey Brothers it's the first time in as long as I've ever sort of paid attention to American Sports where you've had an acting Top Flight athlete to multiple athletes with so much other public facing stuff well podcast public relationship I mean what what's that is there a purist out there in the sports world that thinks that no cuz he's still performing I think if he was an athlete who who lost the step and then you know was like I'm podcasting I think when you when you're playing like [ __ ] and your podcas and your teammates are probably like maybe stop the broadcasting Super Bowls back to back like [ __ ] he's a Phenom uh his brother was a great lineman and uh he retired but Travis Kelce is in the conversation for best tight end of all time and he's still unguardable and he's got the best quarterback so I mean they're they're unreal a lot of people are convinced uh that Travis Kelce and and Taylor schwift were put together by like you know Democrats to be like you know they're like it's it's not a real relationship they were they're both Democrats were they're using them to get votes which is I'm like well then get two [ __ ] Republican celebrities get uh Kanye and Caitlyn Jenner to date that's getting you some votes that's more eyeballs but my thing my thing is like his performance hasn't slipped with this Taylor schwift thing either that's the other thing like we're talking about like your his podcast and his performance is like it's funny how much sh [ __ ] he's getting because every athlete Kim Kardashian started sleeping with just started to suck and he's still good you know you think sleeping with Taylor Swift is a performance enhancer no no I think I think someone that famous is probably draining you a little bit but he's probably got endless stamina he's a he's a world class athlete yeah no I think just being around that level of celebrity I'm sure there's Parts where he's like [ __ ] I should probably be list right now or doing some training and I I got to put on a top evading the paparazzi or whatever it is got to do sacrifice child blood at the full moon for a pentagram on the floor with people in hoods I have to dress like a sailor at the US Open I should be lifting weights but you know uh can you imagine if that is if that was the truth if it is a Democrat conspir or fiser or whatever gave gave them both an unlimited amount of money or something uh but you get the call it's like Mr Kelsey um you have been called up to do the duty for not only your political party but the future of your country it's like all right well I guess you know kind of always wanted to serve in one form or another what is it that you need me to do it's like we need you to bang Taylor Swift yeah not awful does worse jobs yeah uh I think Katie Holmes got the same call but from Tom Cruz's people we need you to do a duty we need you to protect an American movie star you need to help him pretend he's not gay Will Smith same call to Jada pinket and so on down the line the Will Smith Arc is fascinating yeah absolutely fascinating I remember this video of his where he was on a treadmill there was a dude next to him on a treadmill and they were going to have a competition to see who would quit last and will say something along the lines of either I'm going to pass out or I'm going to beat you you know when will was kind of he had this sort of almost Tony Robbins y motivational sort of era or at least this this was part of it I remember a bunch of different videos I was like ha like I really like that this is before Goggins and Joo and kind of that world of like you either win or you die stuff came through yeah I was like huh will was like a kind of a shredded guy masculin hero I Am Legend he's jacked he's done like a bunch of movies what was that one Hancock where he was the drunk superhero yeah the really Charming kind of unique complex slightly complex character that could have been so much better that one movie premise yeah uh yeah and then you just look now and I don't know I so you know uh Danny and Ryan from the boyscast they're both big Will Smith fans yeah and they're really worried like unironically this is not a joke worried about Will Smith um and it's weird it's just such a weird Arc that to to kind of see what's happened and then there's these weird videos of him behind the scenes she got this um I've told you not to record me do you see that one no where this is my life and you're sort of and it's her it seems like sort of berting him a little bit or it's really it's really really uncomfortable to watch it's obviously just in the house or something in this guy just looks broken Dead behind the eyes such a weird art isn't it amazing that you you're so envious of some of these people's lives it's only natural when you see how much someone has going on you're like wow and then they're often miserable I mean he really seems like an unhappy guy it's almost like being that famous for almost 40 years it's not healthy what other outcome could there have been after being famous for that long I think he's Pro my guess is he's probably probably gay I don't know I mean could I get sued for this all right allegedly gay allegedly well it's like the marriage is definitely bad you don't just slap someone in the face after they make a joke about your wife cuz things are stable at home that's not it's just not what you do you someone makes fun of my girlfriend I'm just like hey don't you know just don't do that I'm not or if it's an award show i' probably be like haha and then just fake it you know but you don't be like keep her [ __ ] name out of my mouth and then slap a guy on live it's crazy it's crazy behavior something's not right at home I mean she was publicly talking about having an affair right I wouldn't I would probably wouldn't stay with someone who did that I don't know what the divorce looks like I don't know what the prenup situation is I she she seems like a absolutely Psychopathic person yeah she seems like a legitimate crazy person I I can't imagine someone I'm sure he [ __ ] around too Lord knows with who maybe women maybe with guy I don't [ __ ] know what they're doing but uh but if someone cheated on me and then went on a book tour talking about cheating on me I'd be like probably time to wrap this up didn't she say something was to do with rappers too didn't who was it that she said that she was The Muse for don't you just hate someone who [ __ ] huh Tupac was she apparently that was part of the tour she might be [ __ ] good then I mean dude she she's responsible for uh Will Smith and T all eyes on me me against the world and Men In Black in the 90s go Jada she might be good one of the things even with the Kelsey Taylor Swift situation that I think about and I guess Will Smith's one as well is uh how difficult it is to have a relationship normally mhm and then how difficult it is to have a relationship with a few hundred million or a few billion people's eyes on you as well I don't think mercifully almost no one's ever going to really no matter even like someone like Rogan like his relationship his marriage is just not any part of anybody's conversation no one really gives a [ __ ] he's done a very good job of mentalizing his private life and keeping it private which I think is I think it's crazy he's married to a Filipino boy but he's done a great job and uh good job Joe I just navigating a relationship that's that public must be essentially um no it's it's uh it's got to be hard I mean but problem is the you're talking about these people their spouse is also famous so when you're dating a famous person people are fascinated with it I guess and I mean look at Bena like in JLo it's you know what's they're currently about to break up or breaking up I thought they broke up I don't know right okay there was a I saw I mean it must be addictive like Ben Affleck got the addiction thing so it must be addictive to make what you know is a bad choice and [ __ ] her is a bad choice for him clearly it keeps ending right but he's got to be like it must be like a drink oh did they keep breaking up and getting back together well they were dated like like 20 years ago remember yeah like 20 years ago they dated and now back and now broken up again yeah yeah it's clearly not working but it's like it is like a it's a beautiful thing if that works out like I guess it was you all along and then yeah yeah yeah yeah it's a nice story uh one the one relationship Jay-Z uh and Beyonce just seemed like I don't know that that's the one that appears to just be moving smooth they everyone's got problems I I don't buy that like not Ranna Chris Brown problems that was oh yeah I was going to say that wasn't a that seemed to be very smooth cut and dry and uh yeah he uh man he really bounce back from that huh some some people have really stayed cancelled who have done way less bad [ __ ] have you ever checked out the Chris Brown Reddit no it is cult likee people love him so much it is it's a a real force of nature to see and if you see um any would you say that they have a toxic relationship with him I don't know I think they probably do I don't know it's it's it's very exessive I don't know what it is I I need to do a deep dive on it I've seen a couple of videos that kind of break it down but if there's ever any criticism it's kind of this swarm presumably it maybe appears on the subreddit or some other channel of some kind but yeah Chris Brown's a a uniquely sort of positioned did he is it Chris Brown that did the Super Bowl this year is it him no no this year's Kendrick Lamar's Kendrick Lamar that was it yeah uh but yeah just wow um very very obsessive fan base so don't get on the wrong side of than I think don't do a Cris Brown joke that would be a bad idea for you I've done so many have you of course how could you not it's like he like he was like the insert domestic violence joke guy for a while role model for domestic violence yeah I mean you had to like the poster child for domestic violence you had to throw him in I don't know I feel every comedian's made a Chris Brown joke it's like talking sprinting without talking usin B you can't exactly don't [ __ ] don't beat up Rihanna and if you're not going to expect Comics to make jokes about you you know in other news this episode is brought to you by Shopify businesses that sell more sell on Shopify which is why they're the global force behind gym shock and skims and aloe and neonic when it comes to converting browsers into buyers they are Best in Class their checkout is 36% better on average compared to other leading Commerce platforms and with shop pay you can also boost conversions by up to 50% best of all their award-winning support is there to help you every step of the way look you're not going into business to learn about how to code or to build a website or do backend Inventory management Shopify takes all of that off your hands and allows you to focus on the job that you came here to do which is designing and selling an awesome product upgrade your business today and get the exact same checkout that we use at newtonic with Shopify head to the link in the description below to sign up for a $1 per month trial period or go to shopify.com Modern wisdom or lowercase that's shopify.com wisdom to upgrade your business today staying in New York one of the guys came on to breakfast the other day and said that he'd just seen Ryan Reynolds walking his dog oh nice like Ryan Reynolds seems to be pretty much like the perfect dude that he's just funny and his relationship's great and he buys a football club and he does stuff for charity and he build billion dollar businesses yeah the Gin the aviation Jin that's what Mark and I are trying to do with our whiskey you know tell me about that we have our own Bodega cat whiskey and we uh we we're we're getting St in the states you need to get distribution state by state it's it's a tedious process so Mark and I you know Mark Norman and I started on Whiskey Bodega cat and it's you can get on bodegacat whiskey.com but you know we're going through 15 cases a week at the comedy seller right now it's great we're at the Strip House the steakhous on 12 Street which is my favorite steakhous we're at uh the stand the other comedy club New York comedy club we're uh we're comedy clubs at the country right now just I think started up at The Comedy Store The Improv got to get we got to get the mothership in in Austin too but we're on it we're moving and uh it's uh it's a long process man liquor some mob run [ __ ] really oh dude it's crazy just the Rings you have to kiss and you know it's it's been a process but well we did taste testing and stuff for uh productivity drink but I imagine that the taste testing for getting a whiskey right is a little bit more um we didn't know were supposed to spit it out we got [ __ ] hammered you're kidding usually when you're take when you're sampling whiskey you're supposed to be but we were just like good you know progressively got better it's like it's weird the last ones that we try are always the best ones these are this is smooth yeah we were we were pretty [ __ ] up uh but we went with one that was like it's everyone has a bourbon we're like let's do Rye it's a little it's a Little's difference not whiskey coniss or it's more Ry it's it's you know uh I mean bourban is a little naturally more uh sweet like makers is more sweet than like say like arai is typically a bit more spicy R is not that spicy it's got like uh it's kind of got like a caramel vanilla type flavor it's got a little spice perfect for a Manhattan it's my favorite drink I like a Manhattan a Negron a martini anything with anything I like the classics they try to paper plain's a good cocktail if you never had it what's up it's whiskey apparo amaron Nino and uh and lemon juice in equal parts it's [ __ ] great is a man Manhattan's the one that's got nothing in it that isn't alcohol right there's no mixer I think it's a good drink a martini is the same way that's true that is but you do uh yeah it's a Manhattan is whiskey sweet vermouth a touch of Bitters and a marcino cherry there that doesn't have alcohol in it the the Cherry fruit it's a fruit salad glorified fruit salad easy yeah although by the time you have it it has some alcohol in it because you dunk it in it's funny that uh people end up creating products that are built around the thing that they do so for me I wanted something that I could have before a podcast that would be good so I do this a lot of comedians drink I got into alcohol because it was open bars I was like 18 I was like I get to drink for free here I'll be a comedian that was literally what I mean and then you were like oh [ __ ] I have to work hard but at the at the time I was like the thought process was freee drinks oh my parents were terrified remember they came to a show and I was like blackout drunk on stage I just was like I get to drink for free I was young I couldn't control myself you know Secret Service accidentally included the 9/11 hijackers in a tribute post to the victims this year in a post on X marking the anniversary of the attacks the Secret Service included the terrorists in the death toll o so the flag hanging in our headquarters is a solemn reminder of 911 and its mission purpose Testament to freedom and sacrifice Don has all 2,996 lives lost uh but the actual correct number of victims is 2,977 they had to amend it and get rid of the 19 hijackers a lot of people lost their lives at day so let's not let's not just you know you got to throw the terrorists in there too I didn't know it kind of does make sense you don't to honor exactly the hijackers but if you're going to cite how many people died that day like are we talking demographically accurate here or talking in terms of tribute I've always said that that terrorists and comedians have a lot in common because we both get bummed when not enough people make it to a gig you know because I feel like terrorists would be like three people on a bus this is [ __ ] [ __ ] you know I guess I'll do it tomorrow yeah yeah but uh yeah that's insane man that's uh geez you must have been here during I was yeah can you recall the day of course yeah it was like you know people had cell phones but no one had service so I remember New York's an amazing City because everyone by the way in school the morning the morning we F the the planes hit I had a Spanish teacher we all did not like and she decided to give us a pop quiz and we're like we're under attack we you're giving us a [ __ ] pop quiz and uh and she was like yeah you should have studied not not only from the Middle East but also from you that's so true I mean I was like I was like what she's like you should have studied and I'm just like I'm I'm GNA [ __ ] fail a test because you know I I should have studied but uh and then I got out I think on the test I wrote you suck because I didn't study and I was like I I'm just going to take the L here and then uh and then we got taken out of school my dad was like let's line up to donate blood cuz they might need blood at the hospital so we went to a hospital how far away were you were you able to see no my dad saw it from his office my dad worked in Time Square so he saw the second plane hit from his office and was like Jesus [ __ ] Christ yeah and then uh he went to pick me up at school we uh lined up to donate blood every hospital we went to they were like we're good unless you have this blood type we're we're good because so many people had done it too so many people yeah that's how New Yorkers are we'll say [ __ ] you to you in the street but when [ __ ] gets serious we will we will donate blood we'll help out but how old were you geez I was uh 15 uses a 15 can a 15-year-old give blood oh yeah yeah it's a nice youthful I had AIDS but I didn't tell them that you know they didn't know that but yeah no I uh yeah I I we all lined up my whole family but uh crazy day crazy [ __ ] day and I was in New Orleans for Katrina so bad [ __ ] follow me might be it might be God might be trying to send me a message yeah uh yeah no it's it's a while what was the subsequent few I don't know month couple of months in New York like after that it was uh it was there was a bit of tension I think there was definitely some uh looking back there was definitely some islamophobia which is really unfortunate and uh I think there was everyone in the city knew someone who lost someone you know and uh 3,000 people that's C well enough to touch a coup the terrorist but uh it was crazy it it was it was terrible it was a terrible uh thing but you know it's a it's a resilient City it's a wild thing I watched um was it recently the 25th anniversary uh documentary started coming out and to look at just doesn't feel right to call it a 25th anniversary that's what they called it 911 to 25 buckle up guys come back I went on I went on a one of the planes years it was like two years ago it was the 20- year anniversary they did uh it was it was uh you're going through security and it said 911 never forget I'm like I'm going through airport security I can't forget while I'm going through [ __ ] maybe don't remind me of a plane crash when I'm at the airport yeah going on a Boeing yeah oh my God [ __ ] that's a that's another one Alaska Air talk about you look online and and they're like we're having a discount the flights you go on Expedia all the Alaska airs are like 500 bucks cheaper a man that spends a lot of time on planes I imagine that's something you might pay a bit of attention to yeah if a girl if it was a girl I'm not that serious about I'm like I'll fly in on Alaska Air you might make it you might not who knows yeah uh I mean how many times does Boeing want to face plan they've got the uh astronauts that are stuck in space as well it's like not only although given how things are going in our country right now they might be better off chill out yeah uh but yeah whether it's InterContinental or transatlantic or [ __ ] interplanetary uh they're able to sort of fail at each different step of the way I have you ever been on a plane where you're like this is going down the worst turbulation turbulence I've ever had was on a flight 17 hour flight from Johannesburg to Atlanta and um that I was laid flat trying to get some sleep and I was lifted off complete like absolute freefall air that's how much like Exorcist level [ __ ] levitating yeah uh and then Christmas this year flying back to the UK tons of delays taking off out of Austin and the uh pilot came over and said I know that we've been nearly two hours in uh being delayed for take off but don't worry because the jet stream Gulf Stream is is really strong at the moment so we'll we'll make the time up in the air by the way that's not a thing we'll make the time up it's the same distance but he's able to go faster I don't buy it he managed to get us into like going down one of those water park slide shoot things with a pressure hose behind us but the entire journey I I would have happily arrived two hours later and not being dishwashed for the entire Journey but those those were the two that come to mind and when you're in a really big plane when you're in a little plane you're like okay this is probably there's a bit of me in the back of my mind that thinks yeah but it's like a pingpong ball you know it gets blown around a lot by the wind yeah but if you're in a absolute monstrosity with 500 people in it in order for this to actually get shaken around a lot I don't get that nervous but those are two times where I sort of I've been I've been in the little one where I was we uh my friend Gary and I it's so funny I saw this I saw a comedian Jim nordon at the comedy seller and he goes oh where you are this week where are you this week and I said said I'm in um I'm in Rochester and he goes oh I hope you're driving I hate that flight that little plane I was like no I'm flying it's a long drive New York yeah it's like a 6 hour drive from New York but he's like I hate it we're on the plane Gary and I we book tickets sitting next to ourselves or we're on the flight Gary and I we book tickets sitting next to each other and uh some woman like is like I'm sitting here and I'm like oh no we booked it but then I just looked at him I'm like it's a 40-minute flight like [ __ ] it just give her the seat who cares and uh then we're in the worst turbulence ever it's like shaking we're going down and the instructor like he doesn't even speak he's just I'm like oh we we're about to German Wings this [ __ ] this guy's about to kill us we're freaking the [ __ ] out we I look at him the woman who is supposed to be sitting next in the back row starts going and there was a moment where we were like looking at her like [ __ ] you [ __ ] you [ __ ] you if you die we won't be that upset but but then he just like top gunit so we just we're going down he just flew right and we were like what is he is like is he [ __ ] with us is this like some cruel joke and then it turned out uh like 10 minutes later he comes on the speaker like sorry guys it was too windy to land I had to I didn't want to get on the thing I had to focus so I want to get us around but then the guy picking us up the airport's like man one of those planes top gunned it we're like that was us dude I partnered with function health because I wanted a better way to track what's happening inside of my body they run over a 100 lab tests each year covering Heart hormones nutrients thyroid and even detecting 50 types of cancer at stage one that's five times more testing than a regular physical and all results are charted over your lifetime and explained in one simple dashboard lab testing like this would usually cost thousands but with function it's only $500 you get a streamlined evidence-based system that tracks your health Trends over time and gives you real data to optimize your lifestyle I rely on function because it's evidence-based and run by a team of expert Physicians so that you can trust that the data and insights you receive are scientifically sound and unbiased plus Dr Andrew hubman is the scientific adviser and Dr Mark Heyman is the chief medical officer function has a weit list of over 300,000 people but every Monday they open a few spots for modern wisdom listeners so right now if you go to the link in the description below or head to function health.com wisdom you can bypass that weight list today that's function health.com slod wisdom there there's a movie I don't know if you ever saw this Argentinian movie called uh wild Tales it's great it's a bunch of really dark short like shorts basically and one of the shorts is everyone's on a flight and they start two people start chatting and it turns out they have a connection to each other and they're like that's weird and then a person behind them is like did you say you know this person and they all kind of turns out everyone in the flight knows each other and then it's a guy who got them all on a flight and kills them all oh it's some sort of Vengeance thing yeah oh that's cool it's a good one the whole movie is great I I spoiled one for you I'm sorry but the last one at the wedding is the best one it's incredible so people watch that I'm sure you can just stream it like where you rent movies wild Tales it's from it's from like probably 10 15 years ago it's it's awesome that's sweet every every one of them is good yeah I wonder you know when you think about um the media that gets loaded onto planes so many movies have got plane crashes in but there's no way there has to be some sort of uh limitation of what you can put on that you can't put movies that have got really extra plane crashes in because it's cuz if you're sitting next to him you're like I don't want to see that [ __ ] right for sure yeah for sure there's a you ever watch like a weird I remember they had the movie secretary on my flight once and I'm just watching this and it's like a lot of BDSM it's James sper and Maggie Gyllenhaal he there's a secretary that he's really sexually inappropriate to I mean it was pre me too it's very dicey where he's just making her do crazy kinky [ __ ] as a secretary and I'm just watching this and there's just like people next to me like what the [ __ ] are you want you could tell they're like this is not okay but fun movie there's a uh a cool Insight around airplanes where people that sit in economy have to walk through business to get there there's a nine times increase in passenger agitation so the number of incidents where somebody gets logged as being disruptive or whatever it's increased by nine times if the people in economy have to walk through business class it's called the poverty parade that basically everyone that's everyone that's really nice has already sat on they've got their champagne or their orange juice or whatever and then everyone else has got to sort of trapes ped with their eyes down does the proletariat have to go into their blood and feces and straw the back Point what I do I think for years I I think flying coach for so many [ __ ] years every weekend like cheapest flight possible I think it' [ __ ] my neck up because I would just I'm 63 I would just fall asleep like like and I was like I think I have neck problems uh but you know yeah it doesn't make a lot of sense I you see a lot of incidence I mean people that woman had a whole career made that woman who had like a meltdown on the plane this is what we doele [ __ ] there is not real yeah and she's like got a following now of people it's so funny how people instead of us being like that person's clearly mentally ill we're like oh we should continue to lift this she was the supernatural Hawk tour wasn't she she was Haw T is a big one well I mean the meme I've been at this something I've been totally obsessed by over the last 3 months all of this summer the speed of memes and news you know we went from Haw tour to Biden's scile to Trump's shot in the ear to Kamala Harris coconut season to BR girl summer to you know it and every single one erased all of the ones that came previously no one's talking about Trump being shot no one is being is he got shot in the or it was a piece of glass or whatever the two months ago yeah and everyone's already I'm way over it that's it's old news yeah that was two months ago the the assassination attempt 13th of July what say 14th of September or something like exact almost exactly two months ago you know uh it's interesting Andy Warhol used to say everyone will be famous for 15 minutes but he he didn't have this type of social media when he was around like you can parlay this into maybe a lifetime of missed it with without monetizing un only funds that was the pivot but then but that she's so young that I respect her for not doing that because she could have done that she could have been like I'm just going to get naked and be a but clearly she's like I want to I want to do some other [ __ ] cash me outside check did pivot into it I think she's one of the top creators on only fans now oh my God I think there was a cash her finger in herself yeah outside uh there was a breakdown of businesses their revenues and the number of employees that they have I think only fans has less than 60 employees and its revenues are in the billions yeah per employee more than Pro Sports they say yeah yeah all of every NBA player put together is less than the revenue of only fans yeah which is weird because who only fans LeBron who's like the biggest pay person I don't know I don't know let me see if I can find out Top This is Gonna I'm going to be pixeled for the rest of my time by searching top I've never done it I've never like like subscribe to someone on only fans only fans creators I mean this has got to be by the way it's so funny to call them creators just some chick getting drilled on her couch and we're like she's a Creator creative uh Erica Mena monthly earnings 4.5 million not bad bad baby there's h a lot of hes in that uh 4.33 million Tana M mongu who are you jacking off to honey it's not what you think it's it's a bad baby was jacking enough to a bed well they have a PornHub a really great their data science team this sounds like a this sounds like the dog ate my homework excuse for watching PornHub but the data science team at PornHub is actually really really great and they'll tell you what the top trends are and the top search is and and what's changed your on your and you know this particular one state has got a a foot fetish is that like Napster though for porn stars now because they're they're not paying them oh yeah that's a good point but so I'm friends with a adult actress in the UK and she said that the whole job of PornHub now for most at least women maybe guys too is it's the front end of the funnel that drives the traffic into so it's like YouTube for comedians is porn PornHub for more like Instagram where you've got your little short clips and that's what'll go up on PornHub you get to watch you know five minutes just just her sucking a [ __ ] subscribe to my actual Channel though honestly yeah to watch the full video see below yeah you get to see it in 360p but the full 4K surround sound experience is available on my website yeah I didn't know it's I mean it's it's absolutely fascinating but I used to have a joke about I I would look at so much porn that it would like funnel into my because on the dating apps you can choose like what kind of ethnicity you would want on some of them so I'd be you know I'd watch so much porn that it would funnel into it I'd be like Asian uh mil neighbor hand job yeah yeah I do wonder what uh what the future is going to end up being whether we look back on this period is like an odd every period's odd like but yeah that's that is true I suppose you look back at the Victorian era it's like you showed too much ankle there Melinda how could you you know what I mean like that's a little bit well now well dude everyone is in their own world right now everyone like it's like that thing like you know the meme [ __ ] thinks he's the main character you know something like that but you'll see a guy on a bike riding by I almost got hit by a guy on a bicycle a few days ago because he's filming himself like talking for some Vlog and I'm like some idiot he could he could have gotten like badly hurt I could have gotten maybe hurt but he's like it's all for Content man and he probably got me at the MB like [ __ ] you I'm angry but like that's all part of the video in the background of that guy's cycling Vlog that's what I love about this city I saw a woman scream at a guy going the wrong way weigh in a bike zooming by and she goes [ __ ] and I'm like ah I love an an angry old lady in this city they're fun well those uh ebikes cuz I I haven't been in they're fast and people wearing helmets dude absolutely R it must be at least 20 mil an hour maybe more that those they're able to go dedicated cycle Lanes same with the scooters yeah it's hard that's dude I I learn to drive in New Year I'm a bad driver but like I can drive in Manhattan which I think is like one of the hardest places to drive because so many [ __ ] things are happening like it's yeah you need to be one of those whmo uh cars but you need that for your head you've got eyes wrapped all the way around your back I don't know there's I'm still very much in even though I've spent I know a total of a month in this city across my life there is a confidence that New Yorkers walk with it's like a a rhythm self-assured vibration that they move through the city with that if you're not if you haven't been indoctrinated you just do not have I haven't got the people have the right of way over the car so it's like we're more confident like Colin Quinn is like the quintessential New Yorker to me he's a great comedian Colin Quinn he's got a Netflix special called New York story it's the one of the greatest standup specials ever I think and I love Colin and uh he has a joke about how like people will be driving like oh my God I almost got hit by that person you know because we walk with so much confidence but it it is it's the truth we we feel like we run this city and as it when you are driving you're kind of like what the [ __ ] is wrong with with that guy like I could have Hur him you know do so if you're a New Yorker if you're a a you know domestic born and raised New Yorker do you walk everywhere do you take the che or is it sort of a a choice based on your preference for whether you cycle I don't bcle I don't like I my dad never taught me how to ride a bike I'm worthless dude I'm more I'm talking I'm like holy [ __ ] I have no abilities no motor skills I can just say rude things that's all I got yeah um my dad once took me to ride a bike in Central Park and just let go of me and I went down a hill and I crashed into a [ __ ] tree and was like we're done with that and that was it it was just like I give up daily now yeah and so I've I've ridden during Co I was when we didn't know what was going on I rode the bike a couple times downtown but I was getting wiped out a couple I sucked at it and uh no I don't do the I the tube was basically just a a a homeless fight permanently happening 24 hours a day that you have no that's the media like there look there's crazy [ __ ] happening on there but they love when it does cuz it's like New York's falling apart I ride the subway everywhere okay uh I I'm a walker I walked here I I I like the subway but uh when I take if I do take a car I try to always make it a Yellow Cab because you know they [ __ ] over the Yellow Cabs a city they the medallions worthless so I try to they not just pivot to becoming Uber drivers is that not the solution the problem was if you have a medallion that was kind of an investment and you would The Medallion so you can get the cab expensive yeah they would retire on them they would send them sell them for like over a million dollars you know so it was because there's a limited number of Taxi spots available yeah right it's a scarce Resort it's like the the original Bitcoin it's the Bitcoin of the of the F taxi world but then they just let Uber people oh you have a car you can be an Uber driver so that [ __ ] them over completely so I try to stay loyal to the cabs uh look every once in a while you regret it cuz an award with no ratings you don't know what you're walking into sometimes so like I'll be in there and the guy's like oh this guy's an [ __ ] he's you know but I try to stay loyal to the cabs what's your advice for people flying into and flying out of uh New York because For the First time ever I flew into Newark coming here that's pretty sweet yeah well you have options you could you could take a cab you could also take the train you could take Amtrak in which is kind of nice and then you know the subway you got that JFK you got the you can take the subway if you want to go public transit but JFK is a tough that's a bad airport which is wild because it must be one of the busiest airports in America well look at LAX that's a terrible [ __ ] airport and that's it I've never had any better exper I mean I hate the get on the bus to get to the cab to get to the city that that is insanity very painful uh but it's like you look like you're in like a detention Camp it's insane that yes yeah that is true you're one of the Wagers just waiting to be Shi off somewhere yeah that's funny ah where else have I been to that was Atlanta is a wild airport that thing's a city that just exists as a oh you it's three miles to get to where you need to get in Uber it's [ __ ] crazy yeah and there's that big loop train thing now now we're doing what what I said I should do as a ComEd we talking about travel airports all the time everyone listening right now is like I'm going to [ __ ] put a gun in my mouth what else is coming up for you else have you got well I got this special on Prime video called you've changed I'm I'm proud of that one it's got some really good jokes in it uh a couple SP like over a year and a half touring with that so I felt I feel pretty uh good about that hour it's got a really it's called you've changed cuz there was a bid init where um it's a true story a woman tried to cancel me uh I had a trans joke in a speci in a Netflix special and it was actually a really positive joke it was a fun joke it was very positive about trans people and it went viral and all these trans people started weighing in like you know hell yeah one of them was like this is how you do it I was like I'm a [ __ ] good guy I guess the next trans person was like this is our person now and I was like uhoh you know this could back I support but you don't want me to be the voice of the [ __ ] movement and then the next trans person was like this is my least favorite comedian and yes I know his work and I was like who the [ __ ] is this P so I start clicking on the profile and it's someone who tried to cancel me in 2013 and uh and she hated my jokes and and he used to be a she which I don't give a [ __ ] about like it's your life do whatever the hell you want but every post that he writes about me now is [ __ ] samarel he made bad jokes in 2013 so I finally responded but you know that people can change very clever so that's the special is called you've changed and it's a fun special it's on Prime video I think it's like hard jokes top to bottom I got the rights back for my Netflix special so that's on my YouTube channel that's called same time tomorrow I've got uh I got this which is a special I self-produced on YouTube in 2020 which I'm proud of that one too but then I'm on tour I'm announcing a new theater tour starting I believe first week of February doing the the tour bus and the whole thing and I'm coming literally everywhere I this is probably coming up after my Euro tour so uh I got Spokan I'm doing a weekend at a club in Spokane Washington October 24th through 26 I'm doing a weekend in Cleveland at hilarities one of my favorite clubs November 21st through 23rd I believe and I'll be popping up all over just to work on the material before we go back to theaters and I'm coming to every American city truly every city so uh sam.com and hit tour and I I'll be coming to your [ __ ] City and I post my [ __ ] on punch up. live samarel because they don't censor me my friend Danny Frankle started an app he used to work at Facebook the issue for me at Facebook and Instagram is I'm sure you deal with this they they bury any post that has anything problematic in it and guess what they decide what's problematic it's becoming increasingly uh strict I put a I was wearing a very like loud pair of track pants yesterday that looked like uh what a karate teacher from the 90s would wear so I put can't wait to roundhouse kick someone in the face wearing these bad boys within 30 seconds my account had a warning and I had to go through a bunch of things because it had been autodetected that I was inciting violence it's insane wow that's really it's getting dangerous dude and it really uh for jokes like you know sometimes sometimes you say something sarcastically sometimes you're and but guess what if you're sarting horor Comedian says thing that he doesn't really mean exactly but then you they read that some robot that can't detect sarcasm sees that as like a threat or like something that's hate speech but you kind of have to look at a person's track record and what they actually believe I'm not going to actually say what I believe all the time but if you know who I am you know what I believe so what's the punch up punch up. live uh and he's got an app now for punch up but Danny's become my good friend he left Facebook because he loves comedy and he you know I think he did really well over there but now he wants to he wants to take down Ticket Master essentially cuz he think they're taking so much I mean you see what the government so what is it it's it's a it's many things it's a place where you can see uncensored comedy like like YouTube like specials sure you can put anything on there I put I put a lot of Clips on there that basically but I just asked for your email instead of your money because I just want your email for when I tour so um yeah I post Clips up there that will get flagged by Instagram and I'm not super provocative but these are just going to get flagged you know so I post Clips there and I post all my dates there and I collect emails there so I can uh and I don't spam you I just want to you know have your email so when I'm coming to your city I'll tell you it's geolocated so you give me your zip code and I will be like hey come to your city this week or something but I love what he's doing it's nice to have like a free speech platform that's not run by a right-wing lunatic because then just like well like it's free speech and then you log on some of these and it's just like the end word and you're like this isn't really what I wanted hll and Jew jokes all the way down yeah and guess what I got lot of Jew jokes too and they're not hateful so they're a little hateful but they're about me self-hating Jew different samarel ladies and gentlemen dude thanate the heck out of you thank you you too man this was fun awesome if you enjoyed that episode you will definitely love my conversation with Sam's of the half Mark Norman right here go on