Video summary
Robert Greene addresses young men feeling lost in modern society, arguing that they must embrace their natural masculinity rather than viewing it through a negative cultural lens. He notes that while terms like "toxic masculinity" are valid concerns regarding insecurity and aggression used to demean others, the inherent virtues of being masculine—such as competitiveness, ambition, high testosterone levels, and assertiveness—are often unfairly stigmatized. Greene recalls his own upbringing watching Westerns where heroes were in control, decent, and treated women well, illustrating that true strength comes from security rather than proving manhood by pushing people around or belittling others. He emphasizes that respecting women is a genuine sign of masculine confidence, whereas the need to put others down stems from deep-seated insecurity. The core challenge Greene identifies is the lack of positive role models in today's culture; men are often left with figures like Andrew Tate who represent toxic extremes on one side and "wimpy" individuals afraid of their own nature on the other. He asserts that biological drives for aggression, conquest, and mastery are not inherently bad but require discipline to be channeled constructively. Greene uses himself as an example, admitting his competitive edge and desire to win in games or business, which he directs into creating works like *The 48 Laws of Power*. Instead of letting these aggressive tendencies manifest as cruelty, he pours that energy into exposing manipulation tactics and improving the world, demonstrating how alchemy-like processes can transform uncertain desires for power into valuable achievements. A crucial component of this redefinition is self-control, which Greene identifies as a fundamental masculine virtue often overlooked in modern discourse. He argues that being able to control one's passions, silence when necessary, and maintain discipline distinguishes strong men from those driven by insecurity. Many powerful leaders boast about their wealth or conquests not because they are secure, but because they act like "insecure little weak children" trying to fill a void with hot air. True strength is additive rather than zero-sum; building a successful business that provides for others does not require taking something away from the world. The distinction lies in whether actions stem from solid confidence or massive wells of insecurity, making self-mastery essential for navigating modern life without falling into toxic traps. Greene concludes by calling for more men and women to publicly acknowledge these positive aspects of masculinity so that young people can have clear icons to emulate. He suggests that sports are a prime example of channeling aggression positively, but many other avenues exist for directing one's natural energy toward mastery rather than destruction. The goal is not to suppress biological traits like ambition or assertiveness but to discipline them into tools for achievement and betterment. By reframing these qualities as virtues rather than vices, society can help young men find their footing without feeling the need to conform to a culture that tells them their natural instincts are negative unless strictly controlled by self-discipline and ethical purpose.
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what advice would you have for young men
that are feeling a little lost in the
modern world well you have to um you
have to be
comfortable with with who you are and
with your
masculinity so the word masculine has
now got like this negative connotation
around it which is terrible because
you're young man it's not every young
man some men don't feel this way but a
lot of young men I remember myself
you got this testosterone that's roaring
through you you're competitive you're
ambitious you have goals you have this
energy and you want to assert yourself
but it's bad it's bad it's bad you're
not supposed to be like that you know
and so and the culture isn't about
there's no virtue in masculinity okay
there is such a thing as toxic
masculinity in most definitely but there
are
virtues in in being masculine and have
to be defined and we have to have icons
and role models for that and so when I
was growing up oh God I sound like I
hated that when people said that when I
was a kid so I know you're G to hate me
but I'll say that anyway I can't help it
because it's true when I was growing up
you know I watched like a lot of
westerns you know it was the the the
silent hero kind of thing the Gary
Cooper thing but my idea of masculinity
growing up was a man who was in control
of
himself who wasn't mean wasn't pushing
people around who was decent who treated
women well so treating women well is a
masculine virtue is a good thing it
comes from a position of strength you're
not insecure about your masculinity you
don't have to prove that you're a man by
demeaning women by pushing them around
by calling them and Etc
you don't have to take the Andrew Tate
path in life you can respect women and
respecting them is a sign of your
strength it's sign of being secure in
your masculinity you don't need to put
other people down to make yourself feel
better okay so we have to redefine these
qualities but there are no icons like
out out there you either have the Andrew
Tates out of there you have these wimpy
men who are just so afraid of being
masculine
okay your aggression your assertiveness
your
testosterone is a good thing
it's how things get done it's what
energizes you what's puts you in the
world it makes what's makes you
ambitious it makes you assert yourself
and and motivate yourself it has to be
channeled it has to be
disciplined but you have to
see you know we were're talking about
are people pleasing things and how you
reframe it you have to see who you are
and see The Virtue and it and see the
power in that and it's a cultural
problem because men are very confused I
didn't have that confusion when I was
growing up um you know so now it's very
difficult because you're being told that
all these things that you feel naturally
are negative they're only negative if
you can control them so
self-control is a very masculine quality
you're able to control yourself you're
able to control your passions you're
able to not talk too much if you don't
need to talk too much I'm not saying
that women don't have that the opposite
is wrong these are things that men
naturally have because of their biology
and I'm sorry I do believe in these
things um but they're good they're just
how you use them that can be bad and so
I just wish there were more positive
role models out there I
know I could be a real bastard I could
be a real I'm very
competitive when I play games I like to
win and I can be a little bit mean about
it okay I mean I'm a pleaser but I like
winning I channeled it all of my
aggression all of that
testosterone I'm not saying I have more
than anyone I just have normal amounts I
pour it into my books I pour that edge
that aggression that like God damn you I
don't really like you I don't like the
world into the 48 Laws of Power and
here's how these manipulative these how
people manipulate these are how people
can be bad and cruel
and damn it I'm going to get out all my
aggression by exposing it and showing it
and being as real and direct I Channel
it into something as opposed to hurting
other people kind of thing so finding
ways to channel your aggressive
tendencies is a positive way way of
being a man you have to find whatever
that is sports is a great example but
there are other things as well it feels
a lot like Alchemy in a way uh or
actually it's even
it's Alchemy is taking something which
is bad or useless and turning it into
something which is valuable this is
taking uh something which is uncertain
it could go either way you know this
desire for Mastery for conquer for
achievement uh and and using it to
propel you forward
and hopefully making the world a better
place along there's no reason that your
desire to pursue and Conquer and and and
become masterful in a has to leave the
world worse it's not some weird zero
some thing where in order for you to
become better you need to take from the
world I think it it's
additive
yeah yeah I mean
um you know you have to you have to be
smart and um you have to be in control
of yourself and you have to be
disciplined but let's just add
discipline to one of the those other
masculine virtues it just needs to be
redefined we need people out there men
and even women who um feel comfortable
with this saying these are the virtues
this was these are the good sides of
being of being a man and being masculine
and so even mastering things and even
being competitive is not bad you build a
business that kicks ass that that that
that does really well that that gives
people certain things that they needed
or they wanted so it's just a matter of
how you channel that energy and how you
control it and what the virtues are is
self-control not feeling like you have
to put people down in order to raise
yourself up feeling confident not having
to boast a terrible ma um toxic
masculine quality is boasting and saying
look how much money I have look how much
women I've slept look at all this other
other thing
you're just talking it's just a lot of
hot air that's not strong that's
actually weak some so many powerful
qualities actually come from a position
of great weakness and insecurity when I
look at leaders who are always like
boasting and talking about you know all
the great things that they've done I see
a little insecure little weak child
having to say these things right so it
just depends on whether it comes from
something solid and strong or it comes
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in if you enjoyed that clip you will
love the full length conversation with
Robert Green right here