The Neuroscience of Manifestation: How Your Mind Is Creating Your Reality | Emily McDonald
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The video explores the profound connection between neuroscience and manifestation, arguing that true change begins with aligning actions, words, and beliefs rather than simply wishing for outcomes. Emily McDonald explains that humans do not attract what they consciously desire but instead manifest based on how their nervous system is wired by early conditioning and past trauma; if one's behavior contradicts their stated goals, the brain remains in a dysregulated state that reinforces negative patterns. To overcome this, she advocates for "identity shifting," where individuals adopt the label of someone who already possesses what they want—such as an author writing daily—which rewires neural pathways by strengthening subconscious associations formed through habits and environment. This approach allows people to move beyond limiting scarcity mindsets rooted in medical diagnoses or depression by embracing spiritual practices like meditation and affirmations as scientifically valid tools for neuroplasticity, viewing past struggles not as permanent barriers but as essential curriculum for healing others' brains.
McDonald further bridges the gap between spirituality and reality by highlighting how repeated positive thoughts activate dopamine-reward centers through Hebb's Law of "neurons that fire together wire together," though these affirmations work best when paired with a relaxed emotional state or physical movement to reduce resistance against deep-seated beliefs. She illustrates this biological advantage by noting that strong belief boosts motivation and lowers stress hormones like cortisol, whereas doubt hijacks perception via an overactive amygdala, causing confirmation bias where the brain filters reality to match negative expectations; consequently, she recommends resiliency plans involving exercise or specific affirmations whenever self-doubt arises. Her personal journey with ADHD serves as a powerful example of this principle in action, detailing how she transitioned off stimulant medication that induced chronic fight-or-flight responses by replacing external dopamine seeking with internal regulation through caffeine, supplements like lion's mane, and mindfulness training to shift from reactive impulses to mindful responses.
Ultimately, the talk concludes with three core truths: live in joy because it enhances performance and makes life about the journey rather than just a destination; recognize that individuals are the creators of their own lives regardless of external circumstances; and understand that people can achieve anything they set their minds to by aligning their energy with their goals. McDonald defines greatness not as accumulating more or achieving specific milestones, but as living authentically as one's favorite version of oneself while letting go of the belief that constant productivity is necessary for success. By focusing on small moments where realizing personal capability shifts internal energy and reduces stress, she demonstrates how immediate application of these neuroscience principles can transform reality without waiting for external validation or credentials, proving that joy and energetic alignment are the true drivers of a fulfilled life.
Read the full video transcript
How important is it to make sure your
nervous system is in alignment with what
you think and believe
>> [music]
>> in order to manifest what you want in
life?
>> You wouldn't really be able to trust
somebody that was always saying [music]
one thing and doing another. You'd
probably have your head on a swivel
around those people. When you're always
saying you're going to do one thing
>> [music]
>> and you're not doing it, your brain is
on a swivel with you.
And that's dysregulating. And then when
your nervous system is dysregulated,
well then that's the [music] energy
flowing through you and that's the
energy you're putting out.
>> neuroscientist and mindset expert who's
been featured in the New York Times and
has reached millions of people across
social media. Today [music] she's going
to break down the neuroscience-backed
methods to help you rewire your brain.
Emily McDonald in the house.
>> Your brain is always filtering your
reality to confirm the beliefs you
already have. You actually get dopamine,
[music] too, when your brain confirms a
belief you hold. And so
>> Even if it's negative.
>> Even if it's negative. So if we are
constantly doubting [music] ourselves
and having this negative mindset, then
our amygdala's going to hijack our
perception and we're not even going to
be able to notice the opportunities
[music] or the things that we want.
>> What is the thing then that keeps people
falling back into their familiar
patterns and way of being rather than
fully [music] shifting into the newer,
greater identity?
>> So I think there are kind of two
components to this, which [music] is
>> We were just talking about right
beforehand. I you were mentioning that
you really got into manifestation or you
started to learn more about it from the
School of Greatness. So I'm I'm grateful
for this full circle moment
that you you have gone on and crushed it
and went to get uh, you know, study
neuroscience and really have built your
own thing and it's been really cool to
watch what you've done. So congrats on
everything.
>> Thank you. It's been amazing and thanks
for your podcast because I don't I mean,
it was a huge player in my journey and
developing learning about manifestation
and developing into my spirituality and
getting to this point where now I'm
getting invited on your podcast.
>> That's great.
>> [laughter]
>> That's great.
One of the things I wanted to start with
is about nervous system and the brain.
How important is it to make sure your
nervous system is in alignment with what
you think and believe within your brain
in order to manifest what you want in
life?
>> I think it is the most important thing.
I would surely think it's the most
important thing. I mean, when I think of
your nervous system being in alignment
with what you want, I think of your
thoughts, your beliefs, [clears throat]
but not only that, but also your habits
and the way that you show up in the
world because your brain doesn't just
listen to your thoughts, it also listens
to who you're being, right? And that's
such a key player and something that I
love talking about is identity
because, you know, your identity is your
destiny in this life and I love talking
about that and it's so huge. I mean,
every single time I shift my identity,
my reality shifts like pretty quickly.
Um and so
that that's because your brain holds a
model of who you are, right? In the
default mode network
is a key component in that. But your
brain holds a model of who you are and
then it uses that model to predict your
thoughts, feelings, behaviors, and
choices without your conscious
awareness. So a lot of the time we think
we're choosing, but really it's our
identity and our nervous system that's
choosing for us and they've shown that
in studies that a lot of time the neural
representation of the choice that you've
made um shows up in a brain scan before
you're even consciously aware of the
choice that you're making. And so that
really is the importance of making sure
your nervous system is in alignment with
where you're trying to go because if
it's not, then you're going to have, you
know, those moments where you're like,
why did I not do the thing I know I
should be doing? Why did I make that
choice? Or maybe you don't even know
what to choose or you're confused or
you're feeling stuck, you're lacking
motivation, and getting your nervous
system into alignment really is the
first step.
>> Interesting. So would you say that our
nervous system
is actually making decisions for us
rather than what we truly want or
desire?
>> That happens a lot of the time without
our awareness. Our brain is making
choices for us. And when I think of the
brain I mean that's a part of the
nervous system so they all kind of work
hand in hand, right? Like the brain is a
part of the central nervous system,
we've got the peripheral nervous system
as well. So these two work hand in hand.
But I think that you know through
processes like meditation and practicing
mindfulness meditation we can start to
become aware of these patterns and build
the awareness of them and actually begin
to heal these things so that we maybe
have more agency over these choices and
in those moments where you're waking up
or maybe for example you have this habit
of eating unhealthy foods and you're
always doing that. If you're opening up
the fridge and you're really hungry and
you're really stressed so your impulse
control is not as strong when you're
stressed or tired and you're opening the
fridge and there's a dessert or there's
a salad it's like your nervous system if
if that's a part of your identity to
always be eating unhealthy foods then
your nervous system probably would
subconsciously motivate you to go and
eat that dessert or the unhealthy snack
or whatever it is. But when you kind of
practice this and you kind of expand
that gap where you feel the desire and
the motivation but you can actually kind
of override it that's when you can start
to choose differently and I always say
you're always doing one of two things
reinforcing your current reality or
creating a new one. And just from the
kind of neuroplasticity perspective
right? Like you're always either
strengthening the pathways you've always
strengthened in your brain or lighting
up new ones and strengthening new
pathways in your brain that can then
help you build a new reality. So yeah I
think that we are always kind of being
subconsciously motivated and we're
always moving in the direction of our
focus we're always moving in the
direction of our identity because our
identity is our destiny.
But so yeah I I think to answer your
question yes but we do have agency to
kind of change what those subconscious
motivations and desires are.
>> Why is it so much harder to create
decisions based on a future reality than
a current reality?
>> I think it's only harder if you don't
have a super clear vision of the future
reality. And this is where I think
practicing the art of I guess I call it
identity shifting, but sort of
constructing
that version of you that has it all.
I think is the most important thing.
Like everybody has a to-do list, but how
many people have a to-be list?
Like, what do you know who you're being
called to become? And I always think,
you know, in every great movie or book
there's this hero's journey. It's like
they don't achieve the goal as a version
of them who started. They achieve the
goal as a version of them they had to
become to achieve it. And that was I
mean, in my own journey, in my own life,
like I knew if I had this big dream, I
was going to have to become a better
version of myself. And so knowing that
if I want to live in a better
quote-unquote better reality, different
reality, then I'm going to have to
become a different version of myself.
And I think that can be confusing if you
don't know who that version of yourself
is. But I like to sit down. I mean, I I
always take my people that I coach
through and even myself through a
practice where I visualize
that version of me who has it all. Like,
who is that version of you who has it
all? What are their habits? What's their
energy like? What's their mindset like?
How do they carry themselves? What do
they do every day? Um what are their
beliefs, you know? And I think once you
get clear on that, it becomes a lot
easier to act as that version of you. So
yeah, I think it's only harder if you
don't have that super clear picture.
>> What is the thing then that keeps people
falling back into their familiar
patterns and way of being rather than
fully shifting into the newer greater
identity that has
the direction of the version they want
to be. When you've lived for 20-plus
years or 30 years with an old identity.
>> Yeah, so I think there are kind of two
components to this, which is literally
just identifying as someone different,
like adopting that label. And a lot of
time that can feel like a lie, right? It
can feel
exactly. And I had I had someone a
client that I coached and he struggled
with this habit that for his entire
life. And I told him I was like he's
like I don't know why I keep falling
back to this. And I was like well that's
it right there. You're you have this
story that you always fall back to this.
And so your brain is just confirming the
story and the belief that you already
have. And so I said just tell a
different story. And he said he came
back two weeks later and he had this
whole transformation already. And he's
like yeah, I just went up to my friend
and I was like I'm just not that type of
person anymore. And he's like my friend
laughed at me but this but it's true.
And so I think that kind of is one
component to it.
But then there's the other component
which there are things that are identity
anchors.
So things like habits, your environment,
the people around you, even the foods
that you eat. I mean the brain is an
association machine. So it always is
making associations or connections with
everything, especially in an
environment. Which is why I mean like
moving is such a crazy way to level up
in life because you're taking your brain
out of an environment, putting it into a
brand new one where there are no prior
associations, there's no old identity.
So you kind of your brain kind of just
has to like build this new construction
of who you are in this new space. And
you know, environment is huge for that
and the people around you are huge for
that. But also your habits and your
behaviors, your behaviors are identity
anchors as well. And so you know, if
you're trying to shift your identity to
someone that is, you know,
likes to go to the gym and exercise
frequently, you also need to be acting
like that, right? You got to also have
to follow through on your word, which is
huge.
And I always say, you know, what do you
trust? Like if someone came to you every
single day and was like oh, I'm going to
do this. I'm going to do this. And they
never do it. Like what would you
believe? Their actions or their words?
>> Yeah.
>> Like we trust people's actions. And it's
like you don't feel you don't Yeah, you
wouldn't be able to trust them. And
your brain is no different, you know?
Like when you're constantly doing the
affirmations or the visualizations, and
you can do that all day long, but if
you're But if you're not acting on it,
then what do you think your brain is
going to believe?
>> to feel like you're a fraud probably
also. It's going to hurt your identity,
right? If you're saying I am doing this,
but then you're actually physically not
following through, what happens to your
brain or your nervous system when you
constantly break your own word?
>> You lose self-trust and self-confidence.
And also that's very dysregulating to
your nervous system.
>> Very.
>> I always say um like discipline is
nervous system regulation.
Um and that's that's because, you know,
going back to this example of you
wouldn't really be able to trust
somebody that was always saying one
thing and doing another. In fact, you'd
probably
have your head on a swivel around those
people. Like you don't you're not
>> Constantly
>> You're right. You're
>> Checking your back constantly, yeah.
>> And so when you're always saying you're
going to do one thing and you're not
doing it, your brain is on a swivel with
you.
And that's dysregulating. That's That's,
you know, you're you feel unsafe in your
own body because you can't trust
yourself.
>> Wow.
>> And then when your nervous system is
dysregulated, well then that's the
energy flowing through you and that's
the energy you're putting out. And other
people can feel the state of your
nervous system, the environment can feel
that, everything around you can feel
that. That's the energy put out and
then, you know,
you're not manifesting the life that you
want from that state.
>> Well, you're draining your energy and
you're exhausting yourself. Your nervous
system is weakening, your health is
weakening, you're not vibrating
and emitting the energy at the highest
level that you could. And I think it's
important to
And listen, we're all going to make
mistakes and we're never going to be a
perfect 100% in integrity with our word
100% of the time. Like we're going to
make mistakes, but it's if you can the
more consistent you can be, the more
empowered you will be as well. Something
you talked about a number of times is
identity so far. What is an identity
mismatch and how does someone know
that's the real reason their goals, the
relationship, or success keeps falling
apart no matter what they try?
>> I think the way you can maybe discover
if you have one is by asking that
question of whatever it is that you
want, whether it be the relationship,
the job, who is the version of me that
has that. And getting really clear on
that and then asking yourself, okay, am
I in alignment with that or am I out of
alignment with that? And I think
>> Mhm.
>> I think it's fair to notice though that
there is always going to be a gap.
But I think that that gap is beautiful
because that's, you know, the work is
never done. Um but that means that
there's always more to become.
And there's always more to grow into and
I think that's beautiful. And I think
actually having the ability to identify
where that gap is, it kind of moves you
from feeling like, oh, I'm stuck and I
don't know what to do next to, I know
exactly what I need to do next and
that's empowering. So, it's not about
labeling, oh, this is where I'm out of
alignment with my version of me who has
it all and that's why I'm not getting
it. It's like, no, it's like, okay,
cool. Now I have clarity. Like I know
exactly what I need to do. So, I think
that's that's that identity mismatch and
if if someone is, you know, really
wanting to achieve something, do
something and they find themselves just
continuing to fall back to old patterns,
I mean, they can check in with
themselves and be like, okay, where, you
know, where am I acting out of
alignment? Maybe what my beliefs, my
habits, my routines, maybe, you know,
even my thought patterns or it could be
as simple as just the label that I'm
using to identify myself. Like, what is
the label that I'm using? When I was
first starting the process of writing my
book, I had that like, I mean, we and I
think it's such a great point to say
like, no one's 100% perfect all the
time. In the beginning I was just
procrastinating writing. I would sit
down and then I'd be like, "Oh, maybe I
could go record a video. Maybe I could
go record this." Or like the those
dishes need cleaning. Like I don't know.
I I could go do that instead. I was
like, "Why am I procrastinating this? I
know I really want it, but I'm not, you
know, doing it." And I finally like kind
of sat down with myself and I was like,
"Oh, like it's a part of my identity to
be a content creator. Like that's a part
of who I am now. I've been doing it for
so long." Um and so it's very normal and
familiar to me to go and do that. It's
just part of who I am. I was like,
"Maybe like being an author needs to
just be a part of who I am and writing."
And so I literally just decided I'm an
author now.
That's who I am. And when I decided
that, I was like, "Okay, what does an
author do?" Well, they write. They write
frequently, whether it be for 30 minutes
or hours. And shifting my identity in
just that simple little way of just
literally choosing to identify myself as
that and then asking myself, "Okay,
well, what does that version of me do?"
Well, she writes. And I think I've
without knowing how this works been
doing this for a long time. Cuz when I
was in college, I would go through kind
of week spans where I'd just be having
so much fun. Like I would be having so
much fun with my friends and, you know,
going out, whatever, hanging out with
them. And then, you know, exam season
would come around. I'd have like week or
two straight of multiple exams. I'm
like, "Oh, it's responsible girl Emily
time. Like responsible girl Emily." And
literally like that was what I would do.
I would then and all of a sudden now
responsible girl Emily, she says no to
plans. She's staying in. She's studying
all night. And that's it really worked
for me. That's what I would do.
>> You shift into that different identity.
>> Yeah.
>> And then you step into it and you create
boundaries to not go out and not party
or not be distracted.
>> Yeah.
>> You shift into that identity. It's
interesting. I've heard you say this
before. You've said that we don't
attract what we want, we attract what
our brain is wired for.
So before someone can manifest the
change they want in their life, what has
to change first at the identity level?
>> At the identity level, I think I mean
everything that the categories we've
kind of mentioned thus far, the labels,
the habits, beliefs, thoughts, energy.
Um so I think all of that. But I think a
huge component to why I say that is in
that we don't attract what we want, we
attract what our brain is wired for, is
is deeper than just identity. I think
it's it's also our programming because,
you know, from as we grow up when we are
first born our brain is a sponge. We're
born with the most connections we will
ever have in our brain. And then as we
learn and grow, our brain actually
starts to like prune away these
connections. And the pathways that are
left is our programming or our
conditioning. And I love this study that
they did with the kittens where they
took these newborn kittens and they
raised them in complete darkness except
for only a couple of hours a day where
they would put one group or they would
put them individually into cylinders
painted with either only horizontal
black and white stripes or only vertical
black and white stripes. And then after
a the kind of critical period of the of
development, they put these kittens into
a normal environment and they like, for
example, the kittens that were only ever
raised to see the horizontal black and
white stripes, they would like have a
vertical bar and they'd wave it in front
of these kittens, they wouldn't react to
it. And so this is I find that this is
so like
true for us in our lives and so many
people it's like the things that we want
a lot of the time are like they're
around like
opportunities are there, but our brains
are not wired to perceive them. And I
remember when I learned about that
kitten study, I was like, damn, like
where am I a kitten in my own life? Like
where am I a kitten in my own life? And
we're all kittens in our own lives.
>> Where are you right now?
>> Somewhere.
Honestly, I feel like this next level
for me, I feel like I've had this very
full circle moment. I mean, just being
here, but also like I finished writing
my book. Um I've grown my platform
tremendously. I have a really successful
business. I'm engaged in my dream
relationship. Like drive my dream car, I
bought my dream house. Like I have all
the things, and then I realized kind of
okay, like
great, but what's next? Because joy, I
mean, happiness, like to me, like one of
my values is growth. And so, it's not
all about what I have, it's about
feeling like I am growing as a person,
um but just in other areas of my life.
And I think my next level is, okay, it's
time to write in some new beliefs.
>> Mhm.
>> Um because years ago, when I decided
that this was the journey that I wanted
to go on,
I was a mad woman, like in my, you know,
affirmations, with my visualization,
with just the way that I carried myself,
and very strict about the energy of the
people that I keep around me, and all of
those things. And I mean, I can
confidently say now that I'm pretty sure
everything I ever wrote down has come
true. And so, now I'm kind of like,
okay, well, what do I want to write down
next? Like, what is like, okay, like, I
think now I am the kitten in my
programming is the life I'm currently
living. And I know that I foresee even
greater levels for myself. And so, now
it's time to kind of wire in some new
stripes to see.
>> Oh.
>> So, that's where I'm the kitten.
>> If you If you could go back, you know, 3
years ago,
to the version of Emily you were 3 years
ago,
what is one belief system that you had
to completely rip out of your brain to
make this life possible?
>> I think
being realistic
and logical.
That's probably the belief system I
>> That's the belief system you had?
>> That I had to rip out.
>> Yeah, yeah.
>> That That was it. Yeah. So, I grew up
just very, you know, parents in finance,
like very logical, mathematical
structure. Um but then also, you know,
in my own life and belief systems, like
I always like math, science, and it's
all very logical, and just the people
around me as well was just very logical
and rational. Um and so,
I kind of had to really, on purpose,
train into my brain, there are things
that could happen that are outside of
what you could ever imagine, and you
have no idea what's going to happen
today. And I think the first time I ever
heard it was from Wayne Dyer, but he
says, "No one knows enough to be a
pessimist." Like, we have no idea what's
going to happen. And there's even days
where I'm driving to the gym in the
morning, and I'm like, "Oh, I got so
much to do today. I'm doing like this,
this, that, whatever." And then I pause,
and I remind myself, "Wait, like I have
no idea what's going to happen today.
Why am I having this mindset that I know
how today is going to go? Like, I have
no idea how today is going to go. For
all I know, some unexpected blessing or
opportunity could come." Like, I have no
idea. And the specific day that I'm
remembering, that's exactly what
happened. Like, a couple hours later,
I'm in a meeting, and I get like amazing
news that makes like my month. So, yeah,
it was it it's little moments like that
that I had to open myself up to. And so,
I think for me, kind of having this
Honestly, I I did not used to believe I
mean, I was the opposite of what I
believe now. I didn't I had a friend my
senior year of high school, and he would
always be like, "You could do anything
you set your mind to." I would get mad.
No, I would actually get mad and be
like, "Don't say that. That's not true."
I I had just so I had so much
conditioning. I mean, I grew up like
with so many different like mental
illness and physical illnesses and, you
know, doctors just not knowing what's
wrong with me. And so, I had all of
these reasons to just believe that life
sucked and that you don't have agency in
your life and that you can't create the
life that you want. And so, that was
really the mindset that I had. And so,
there were a lot of beliefs that I had
to rewire. Yeah, I mean, around scarcity
as well and like living in abundance and
like making money. I
I had so many limiting beliefs around
money, and I had to kind of wire in
like, "Oh, no. Like, there are an
infinite number of ways that money can
come." And really wire I mean, so every
different area, honestly. I talked to
you about the relationship that I'm in
before this, and I mean that was a big
thing that I had to rewire as well. And
so, I was a kitten in a lot of different
areas of my life, and when I identified,
"Okay, these are the things that I'm
wanting." I'm like, "Okay, well, what
are my limiting beliefs that I have
around that?" And then, you know, I kind
of have a I kind of have a little bit of
a
process for kind of overcoming limiting
beliefs, and one of those is by looking
for evidence of the opposite. And you
know, a lot of times we think that our
beliefs are objectively true, and I
always say, "No, like go look for the
evidence of the opposite, you know?"
There are plenty of people that
opportunities just come to them. Money
just comes to them. They are abundant.
It's not that hard for them. And
I think looking for evidence of the
opposite and and recognizing, like,
"Okay, that might be true based on my
past experience, but it's not
objectively true." And it's just opens
you up a little bit to be like, "Okay,
maybe maybe I could shift a little bit
here." And just being open to it, I
think, is the most important thing. And
then, you know, starting small with just
little tweaks. And I remember I would
Yeah, I would start to start very small.
Like, "Oh, like I'm going to see a
feather today." Like, just little things
to kind of build that belief muscle of
Oh, wow, like I'm
saw that feather. Okay, maybe this
works. And then, "Oh, you know, money
can come to me in expected and
unexpected ways." And then I'm walking
my dog and there's a $20 bill on the
railroad tracks outside of my apartment.
I'm like, "Woah, that's crazy cuz I just
wrote that down." And so, just little
things like that were kind of the
beginning steps for me to kind of show
me, "Okay,
maybe maybe this does work." And then
that allowed me to grow into bigger
things.
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>> Would you say then you lived more of a
victim or scarcity mindset most of your
life?
>> Absolutely.
>> Really?
>> Absolutely, yeah. Is that surprising to
you?
>> No, I mean it's just like with the
content you created, it doesn't seem
like it. You know, it seems like you've
always had this mindset, but you would
say that you grew up
more as a victim. I Maybe you didn't
identify it as I'm a victim, but you
lived with that language, that belief
system, that no, life is harder. No, I
got sick.
No, money doesn't come to me easily.
Like you said these things that
identified as a victim, correct?
>> 100%. I didn't know what a victim
mentality was at the time, but that was
absolutely the mindset that I had.
>> living in victimhood and scarcity, you
would say, right?
>> Absolutely.
>> Why do you think your belief system was
built that way?
To think that life was hard or life was
scarce, or there wasn't abundance. Why
do you think you your brain and your
nervous system believed that?
>> The way that I grew up and just
yeah, I mean my own illnesses and also,
you know, close family members growing
up like
getting sick and becoming disabled from
a young age, like very young. I was just
a kid, and so just seeing that around
me, and then that also being my own
personal experience, I was diagnosed
with like I had clinical depression. At
one point I didn't even want to live. Um
and so like anxiety, I mean I was
diagnosed with ADHD. Um also I had kind
of like hormonal imbalances and physical
health issues that ran deep within me,
and at one point I was in and out of
doctors' offices every 2 weeks getting
my blood drawn cuz they didn't know what
was wrong with me. So, it was that it
was exactly that. Like, what's wrong
with me? Sort of mindset. I don't I
don't know what's wrong with me. And
then I think really I mean I went to
college as a biology major. I didn't
start out like pursuing neuroscience at
all. I didn't This was before
neuroscience was a popular thing. I feel
like now it's very popular, but at the
time like I didn't when I switched my
major to it I didn't even really know
what it was. And so I went as a biology
major
and I kind of was going to be pre-med
just because I saw doctors not be able
to help the people that I loved and I
saw doctors not really be able to help
me. Like, and so
I was I wanted to be able to help people
in a way that no one couldn't could help
me and the people that I loved and
that's why I initially went pre-med and
I hated it. I absolutely hated biology.
I hated studying like photosynthesis and
the Krebs cycle just wasn't my thing.
And I actually went up to someone I knew
in the pre-health organization that I
was in. I told them my situation and
they were like, "Why don't you try
neuroscience?" And it sounded cool to
me. Literally, it just sounded cool. So,
I switched my major to it, took the
first class, got a 100 on the first exam
and my professor reached out to me was
like, "Congratulations, you couldn't
have done better." And I responded back
and I said, "I love this. Get me in the
lab." And so I started doing research
super early on working in labs studying
learning and memory and the perception
of time and scanning brains doing fMRI
and
learning about the brain and
neuroplasticity just kind of gave me
hope for change that I didn't know was
even an option. You know, in my
experience it was this is what's wrong
with you. This is your diagnosis. You're
Sucks to suck. Like, you're just going
to have to deal with this for the rest
of your life. Yeah. And I had no one had
ever told me
your brain is changeable. Like, you can
change the wiring and you know,
I still have ADHD for sure, but I don't
struggle with all of the things that I
used to struggle with. And now I'm able
to, you know, direct my focus and
sustain that. And I understand how my
brain and nervous system works so that I
can actually use that knowledge to my
advantage. And so, yeah, I think just
learning about the brain and it made me
so passionate. But that's, you know,
when you say, "I could never tell by
your content." I think that's why I am
so passionate about sharing all of this
on social media and just to everyone
that will listen because it, at least
back in the day, was not popular
knowledge that, "Hey, yes, this might be
something you're struggling with, but
you do have the power to change." And no
one had ever told me that. And if
someone would have told me that earlier,
maybe I wouldn't have struggled for so
long. Um, but everything that I talk
about that everything that I talk about
online, here, on social media is is
everything that I've personally done to
change my life.
>> So, you were sharing before that like
your belief systems have changed also
around
your perception of faith, God. You said
you grew up in the church, then you
became an atheist, and now you're
spiritual. So, how have these beliefs
around God changed and evolved?
And which belief system supports you in
becoming the best version of yourself?
>> The belief system that supports me in
becoming the best version of myself, I
think it's a combination of belief in
myself and belief in my capabilities and
the power of my mind, which I've built
over time um through practice in those
small reps of just showing myself,
"Hey, you can do this." And writing
things down and then going and doing it
and proving myself right.
And I think also my spirituality has
been huge. I don't know if I would have
been able to, you know, manifest the
life that I want without this belief
that there is this, you know, higher
power or energy that exists that
connects all things, that flows through
me, that I can channel, that I can call
upon. For me, that developed probably
late undergrad. So, started studying
neuroscience and then, you know, the
power of the mind, the brain, all that,
and sort of started meditating and
opening myself up to that. I remember
when I actually went into my PhD, when I
first moved moved to Arizona, didn't
know a single person and where I had
moved to, and I had sticky notes that
said trust and surrender all over like
on my door handles, on the mirrors, like
everywhere. Cuz I just had no idea like
what was going to happen. And it was
just such an uncertain and unknown thing
that I was stepping into. But it was
that belief in the higher power that I
believe in, which I don't know. I I I
think my my personal opinion on that is
just like you can use whatever word that
you want to describe it. I don't think
that really matters. Um like what
matters is that you do believe in
something. And And for me, that's I
don't know, just the honestly the word
doesn't even matter. It's like
God, the universe, the collective
consciousness, energy, the divine. I
like divine personally. Um but but yeah,
I think that that belief system has
really been a huge player in getting
where I am today.
>> I'm assuming you grew up believing in
God, but then you said you were an
atheist. How long were you an atheist
for?
>> I don't know if I ever really believed
in God growing up. Like I was a little
kid. I went to Catholic school. When I
think back on those times, it really was
just doing what I was told. So, I don't
know if I ever really had that belief.
>> Okay.
>> It was kind of just practicing the
tradition.
>> When did you say, "You know what? I
don't believe in God or I'm an atheist
and I'm not sure."
>> It was a thing probably when I was in
high school.
Um yeah, I probably just didn't think
about it at all in middle school. I
moved across the country with my family,
stopped going to Catholic school. So,
that was, you know, the first thing that
happened. And then I
was in high school when I was diagnosed
with depression. Like I truly like
didn't want to live. And
at one point like attempted to not live.
And so I I think at that point like it
was just a combination of depression
that actually
had me being an atheist like, "Oh, life
sucks. Like there is no, you know." I
mean, and everything I was struggling in
so many different areas of my life that
I had mentioned this previously that I
my mindset was, "If God is real, then
God must be evil because how could God
do this?"
>> Mhm.
>> And so that was my mindset, and now I
don't have that mindset at all. Like I
have a completely different mindset, but
that's that's the mindset that I started
out with.
>> the mindset shift to not thinking, you
know, if something bad is happening to
me or someone I love,
then God doesn't exist or God is bad or
whatever? What what shifted for you to
think a different thought?
>> I think it's exactly what you had
mentioned earlier. I shifted out of this
victim mindset. And I realized maybe
things don't happen to you, and maybe
they happen for you. And I fully am so
grateful for everything that I went
through because I wouldn't be able to
help people in the way that I'm helping
them now. You know, so many like
everything like my my program that I
have is like I help people rewire their
habits. I help people with their
identity, with their beliefs, with with
focus, learning, memory, stress,
anxiety. And the the reason why I have
so much of this kind of targeted
knowledge is because these are all
things that I personally struggled with,
>> Mhm.
>> and I used the my neuroscience degrees
and my understanding of the way the
brain works and my spirituality to
change my own life in all these
different areas. And so now I can take
all of this and give it to other people,
and I wouldn't be able to do that if I
hadn't gone through all of these things.
And so I think it really was that
mindset shift out of like victim and
realizing, I mean, also developing into
my, you know,
I would say once I kind of
became aware of spirituality, I don't
even think I knew it was a thing until
later in life and realizing, "Oh, hey,
maybe my soul signed up for this, and
maybe I signed up for this before I
came, and maybe this was maybe the
curriculum." And I absolutely believe
that it was the curriculum for me.
>> What if it was God saying this is
everything you need to overcome to
become the greatest version of yourself
to impact other people?
>> Absolutely. And I think that I couldn't
have that mindset back then. Otherwise,
I wouldn't have been able to overcome
that mindset to get to where I am to now
be helping people other people through
it. So, I had to have that mindset of,
you know, God is evil and life sucks and
you just can't control what happens to
you at all. Like life you're just leaf
in the wind. Whatever happens happens,
you know. I had to have that mindset at
one point in order to get to this point.
>> Interesting.
That's fascinating.
>> Yeah.
>> When did you come to that realization
that maybe that was the curriculum for
you to become who you are now?
>> Late
undergrad when I was in maybe my senior
year. I had birthed this dream of
you know, going I took a class on the
neurobiology of drug addiction.
And we read a paper about why the
current treatments don't work.
>> Mhm.
>> And immediately light bulb goes off in
my head because
the current treatments, at least at this
point, didn't work because they were
>> To ending drug addiction or to
>> Preventing relapse to drug addiction.
>> Okay.
>> Um the reason why they didn't work was
because they were only putting band-aids
on symptoms rather than actually
targeting the real problem.
>> Like healing the root.
>> Right. And so, that immediately
resonated with me because all of the
illnesses that I had had and everything
that I was dealing with, it was things
that we don't know the root. We can only
treat your symptoms. And so, immediately
this dream was born within me of, "Oh,
I'm going to go to my PhD and I'm going
to study drug addiction and I'm going to
I'm going to cure drug addiction and I'm
going to win a Nobel Prize."
>> [laughter]
>> And I don't know. I mean, I've always
been a little crazy. So, that was that
was the dream. And then after that,
realizing that, "Okay, I need to go on
this journey and do the work on myself
to be able to get into that position
because obviously that's a huge dream.
And if I'm going to make that happen,
I'm going to need to be the best version
of myself. And so, I started, you know,
I would say I started meditating
and doing those things more with the
mindset of
training my brain for focus and
developing this mindfulness practice so
I become aware and just be a best
version of myself. And then kind of on
that journey opened this other door that
I maybe didn't realize was there. And I
also met people. So, I met these two
people that I became really close
friends with when I was in undergrad and
they were huge in my journey of
introducing me to spirituality. And I
remember them one of them telling me to
read The Untethered Soul. And I read
that book and it very much resonated
with what I was learning in my
neuroscience classes of oh, hey, like
yeah, it's like when you're going to a
movie and you plug in and you're
watching it. It's like that's exactly
how your brain constructs reality.
That's how your visual system works
actually. Like you don't even see
>> in your brain and you're like
>> Well, you don't even see the world with
your eyes at all, right? Your eyes just
take in light signals and then those
light signals travel through your brain
where your thoughts, emotions, beliefs,
memories, programming are all
incorporated before the image is even
constructed that you see. And so
>> see the same image but have a different
perspective of what we're seeing.
>> Yeah, and I remember learning even in
one of my neuroscience classes about how
they're they've actually found
differences in brain activity along this
pathway in people that have body
dysmorphia, for example. So, they their
brain is literally constructing the
image differently. Um and so it's not
just like all in their head and they
just need to, you know, it's like their
brain is actually constructing the image
that they see differently. And so, when
I it kind of all connected and I was
like, okay, yeah, this is a different
world and then these people that I was
meeting and that were very spiritual and
I remember they actually were
manifesting moving to Hawaii and they
had images of like Hawaii all over their
apartment. And that was sort of when I
was first introduced to it. And in the
beginning, I definitely didn't, you
know, think anything of it. I remember
my one friend was would write
affirmations and I just thought
that was I don't know, I didn't think
anything of it. I was just like, "Oh,
affirmations, that's interesting." Like
I didn't think they worked, I didn't
understand them. But then once I
understood sort of the neuroscience
behind these things, I was like, "Oh,
hey, maybe this" and then I actually
remember, you know, as I started to
study these different spiritual things,
um like solfeggio frequencies came up
and that's a very popular thing in the
spiritual spaces, which are just
different frequencies of music, like 528
hertz, 432, and I started listening to
432 to sleep because they've shown in
studies that it actually can help with
sleep. And
I remember lying in bed one night and I
was like, "Maybe these frequencies
actually like do change the state of
your brain and that's why they work."
And
literally, I sat up in bed, went over my
phone, went on to like Google to look
for research papers, found them that
they already existed. I was like, "Oh,
hey, maybe, you know, this spirituality
thing isn't so crazy. Maybe they're
actually maybe there's actually
something to this." And so I think in
the beginning for me, it was very much
seeing how neuroscience very much
explained a lot of the things that my
friends and people in books and on
YouTube videos were talking about and in
your podcast were talking about. I was
like, "Oh, hey, like" and I, you know,
neuroscience was something I was already
studying and so it kind of helped me
make spirituality make sense and that
was really the bridge for me was and
that's why I love doing what I do, in
bridging neuroscience and spirituality
because for me in the beginning, that
was the bridge that allowed me to walk
over that and go into this fully woo-woo
state where if you would have told me
you talked to an alien on the phone
yesterday, I'd believe you because now
I've had so many experiences. And
actually, with that being said, I also
had personal experiences
kind of [clears throat] at the same
time. Like I remember
I was meditating and literally like the
crown of my head started burning, like
burning. And I had no idea like what the
chakras were or any of that. And my
friend was like, "Oh, that was your
crown chakra opening up." I was like,
"What?" And I looked into it and I was
like, "Huh, maybe that was that." And
kind of little experiences like that and
then being in meditation and just seeing
visuals and things coming to me and you
know, different signs to the point where
it was like, "Okay, yeah, I fully
believe in all of the woo-woo stuff
now."
>> Interesting. It's funny, I had Nir Eyal
on the show recently. He's uh
a researcher and he just wrote a New
York Times bestseller around the power
of belief.
And he did not believe in God before or
prayer, but then he started to research
prayer and now he prays because the
research proves that you are healthier
and happier when you pray. So, he's
like, "I'm still not 100% why it works,
but I know it works. And so, I just do
it because it helps my brain." And I
think it sounds like you were learning
different techniques and strategies that
made you feel better and you were
linking them to spirituality and other
things that were happening in your life.
And and you just continued on that path.
And you mentioned affirmations for a
second.
What is the neuroscience behind
affirmations and do they actually work?
>> I think they can absolutely work. So,
the neuroscience behind them is I mean,
it's sort of the power of
neuroplasticity, right? So, anything
that you repeat in your brain, those
pathways become stronger. Like neurons
that fire together wire together. That's
Hebb's law. Like we learned that in our
very first neuroscience classes. It's
Hebb's law.
Um and what that means is, you know,
neurons that fire together, meaning that
you have neurons that are wired into
pathways all throughout your brain. And
when these pathways light up or activate
together, every time they do that and
when they do that frequently, they
become stronger. And then that can
become your more dominant way of
thinking and feeling. And so,
affirmations actually work to kind of
strengthen the pathways that represent
maybe that thought or feeling. And so,
over time it can become your dominant
way of thinking.
Um and they also have been shown to
activate the reward centers in the brain
and boost dopamine as well. So they can
make us feel good and dopamine actually
drives neuroplasticity as well. Dopamine
drives learning. So you kind of get this
double whammy of, you know, boosted
dopamine in the moment, feeling good,
but then also, you know, driving
neuroplasticity to remember it better.
But I think with that being said, it
makes it even more important that the
affirmations are done the right way. I
get asked all the time like, "Oh, I do
affirmations and I have these limiting
beliefs come up and you know, the my in
my my other thoughts pop in and they're
like,
"But that's not true. That's wrong." And
if that's happening, then it might
actually be working against you. And
I've actually had people that I coach um
I remember I had this one person, he had
that happen to him where he would
practice affirmations, they just didn't
work for him. Like they just didn't make
him feel good. He just didn't really
believe them. But you know, he actually
unlocked something where he started to
he fixed up this old jet ski and he
started to go out on the little like
pond or something or lake next to his
house every morning. And he listened to
my affirmations on a speaker on his jet
ski and he found that he they became all
of a sudden so much more believable. And
we'd really do, I mean, resistance
lowers in our mind of the logical mind
when we're moving forward. Like forward
movement, that's why walking is so
helpful for processing information. So
that's actually how I started was I
would go out in the morning every single
morning on a walk and listen to
affirmations in my headphones while I
walked every morning. And so that can
actually lower resistance to sort of
absorbing these affirmations. But then
also, I think he unlocked another
component which was that he was already
boost boosting dopamine from being on
his jet ski, right? Like he was like he
was having fun. But also, right? It's so
much easier to believe in the good when
you're having fun.
>> Yes. Play.
>> Right, exactly. And play is so good for
your brain. That's why I always say like
activating your whimsy is a pro-level
brain hack and just doing everything for
with fun. And that's something that I do
all the time. Um like especially when I
was writing my book where I would be
like, "How can I make this more fun?"
Because it makes it so much easier to
start.
>> So, yeah, I think also, you know, that's
where dancing and doing the affirmations
or listening to There's this one YouTube
track that I really like and it's like a
song with this funky beat, but it's like
funny. It's hilarious. I think it's Bob
Baker.
>> Bob Baker.
>> a it's a funky beat. It's like
And it's it's just hilarious and it's
hard to take seriously, but that's the
point. And the affirmations that all of
a sudden becomes fun and it becomes way
easier to absorb.
>> What are the greatest affirmations
someone could say to themselves every
morning?
>> I think that depends on who you're
trying to become. I think the greatest
affirmations are the ones that you write
for yourself depending on exactly what
it is that you're working on.
>> What was the affirmations you would
listen to when you were getting started?
>> affirmations. They were tracks on
Basically, it's funny this is all coming
full circle now, but these were
affirmations that I didn't realize it at
the time that shifted out of victim
mindset.
>> Ah.
>> Um so, they were affirmations like I am
the creator of my life. Like I I like I
have the power to change and choose and
create the life that I want. And so,
that Yeah, I was shifting out of victim
mindset. So, I think
>> affirmations. Like
I am capable of doing this. I am I am.
>> Right. Like I I am creator of my life
and Yeah, that Those were the
affirmations that really really changed.
And I actually have all of I have a
playlist of affirmations on my YouTube.
And I literally made it public for like
all my for anyone because these are all
the videos that I listened to when I
first started out. And all these I am
creator videos are on there. Yeah, and
it's it was never was for anybody else,
right? When I made it, it was for me and
now I just made it public so I hey, this
worked for me.
But yeah, so they were I am creator
affirmations and really just allowing me
to believe that I could create the life
that I want and then after that, it
became okay, I have limiting beliefs
around money. I think that it's scarce
and that it's hard and
cuz I grew up hearing money doesn't grow
on trees, you know? And that's a
limiting belief if you believe that and
I had to I started like money does grow
on trees. come to me in unexpected
unexpected way. So, you know, that was a
goal that I had so I started to kind of
rewrite my beliefs around that.
>> Mhm. How much of our current struggle in
life is actually a physical truth or
fact versus how much of it is just
poorly wired perception in our brains?
>> I don't know if I could put a number on
it, but they've actually shown in
studies, I can't remember the exact
number of seconds, but it's seconds that
when we have an emotional response to
something, whether positive or negative,
that that kind of chemical
representation of that emotion only
exists in our brain for seconds, like
less than a minute or maybe it's 90
seconds or something like that. And
anything after that is us reinforcing
that feeling with our thoughts.
It's really quite interesting when you
think about it that way and again, we
all get caught up in the the emotions
for longer,
um but I think, you know, I remember I
heard the saying that life is 10% what
happens to you, 90% what you do about it
and after learning that, I was like,
okay, yeah, like things are going to
happen. Things happen to everyone,
everyone, even the super successful
people that we see and like the people
that we assumed, oh, they just had it
easy. Like life is hard for everyone.
Like life is not easy for anyone. Um but
I think what makes it quote-unquote
easier is having that mindset and that
belief in yourself and also that faith
in whatever you believe in, belief in
yourself and belief in the divine, the
creator, um because when you have that
belief, it it I mean, it lowers stress
and cortisol, right? And you have that
self-trust that, "Okay, like I can
overcome this." So, even when things do
suck and the things do happen, it's like
it's okay. And I remember when I was
studying the difference between like
optimistic and pessimistic mindsets,
it's like um bad things like {quote} bad
things happen to everyone, but an
optimist doesn't make that like doesn't
take a bad situation and apply it to
their whole life and mean apply it to
their whole world. Whereas a pessimist
might, you know,
trip over a wire and be like, "Ugh, I'm
so clumsy." Like there's this this this
always happens to me. Like you know,
different little things like that. You
take one situation and you apply it to
everything. Whereas an optimist might
just be like, "Okay, like that happened,
but that doesn't mean that it's going to
happen again."
>> Mhm.
And from your experience of studying
neuroscience,
can you explain then the law of
attraction
neurologically?
>> Yeah, so to me the law of attraction
really is that you don't get what you
want. You get what your brain is wired
for. You get what you are. Right? You
get what you are. From a nervous system
perspective and a programming
perspective, I mean, just I remember
learning about, you know, just the way
that neurons work, right? And neurons
fire and communicate with each other
using electrical impulses. I remember I
had to take calculus physics actually in
college to understand this. It was so
annoying. But current When current flows
through a wire, a magnetic
electromagnetic force is created
perpendicular to that wire. And our
nervous system is a bunch of wires. And
so current is flowing through us all the
time. And absolutely there is a magnetic
field created perpendicular to that flow
of energy, right? And so there's that.
And that energy is felt. I think we have
that like we know that scientifically
now that nervous systems co-regulate.
Like that's why if you're next to
somebody who's all of a sudden getting
super anxious, you feel that. And so if
we can feel other people's nervous
systems, you don't think that the
universe can feel your nervous system?
Like I think that we can. I mean,
obviously we can't show that. Like, "Oh
yeah, the universe felt our nervous
system."
But I mean, I can extrapolate that and
believe that for in my for myself. But
then, there's also the other component,
which is just that your brain can only
construct your reality based on the
programming we have, like the kittens.
And I've seen it so many times. I
remember I had someone come to my
masterclass where I talked about
identity shifting and reprogramming. And
he said he had been trying to get a job
for 2 years. And after 2 weeks after
that class, he got his dream job. And
it's like,
do we think the dream job just magically
appeared after 2 years of searching? Or
was it that his brain and nervous system
shifted into a state to where he could
actually perceive it and get that job,
right? And so, when I think of the law
of attraction, it's really about
changing our internal state and rewiring
our brain so that we are actually able
to perceive the things that we want and
go after them as well. Because a lot of
us subconsciously block ourselves from
our goals or the success that we desire
because we have, whether it be limiting
beliefs or subconscious fears even
around success. And I think a lot of our
procrastination stems from that as well.
I mean, I remember back when I was
trying to start a podcast, before I
started, I wanted to start one for so
long. And I was just like, "Why am I
procrastinating on this?" And then I
realized that I had a subconscious fear
of being seen in a more vulnerable way
because long-form content is just so
much more vulnerable. Like, I'm over
here, everyone can just judge me right
now listening to this.
>> 1-minute curated clip.
>> Exactly. Like, it's so you're just so
much more vulnerable. And I hadn't
become aware of that, right? And so, I
wasn't aware of that fear and it was
keeping me from the success that I
desired. It was keeping me from the
thing that I wanted to manifest, which
was having a podcast. Like, I want to
have a successful long-form content. And
it was keeping me from doing that
because of this subconscious fear,
right? And as soon as I identified that,
I was just like, "Okay, now I can, you
know, just give myself a little hug like
it's going to be all right. Like it's
okay." And then I was able to go and do
it right after that. And just I just as
easy as identifying it, right? And so I
think when I think of the law of
attraction,
it really is just about like we don't
get what we want in life, we get what
our brain is wired for.
>> Mhm.
You mentioned this idea of being
delusional. Is being delusional a
legitimate neuroscience brain hack for
success or is it hurting us?
>> I personally think that and I'll talk
about the science as well, but I
personally think that it's a
requirement. If you want to achieve the
unimaginable, you have to believe in the
unimaginable, right? And the
unimaginable does feel delusional. And I
remember when I first started out,
right? Like
I am creator didn't feel true at the in
the beginning. It's like, "What? No,
like like" and so if the things that
feel delusional a lot of the time, maybe
they're not delusional to someone like
you, you know, me 5 would have thought
the things that you're doing were
delusional, right? But it just depends
on the person. But it's only {quote}
delusional until it works. And I always
say I have this kind of mindset of, you
know, being delusional really is just
living outside of the illusion, which is
the reality of the norm.
>> Mhm.
>> And I personally knew that I wanted to
live a reality of the unimaginable, a
reality that no one around me that I had
ever seen around me was doing. And if in
order to believe in that, it did feel
delusional. It absolutely felt like what
like what are you doing? That's crazy.
And I had people around me tell me,
"That's illogical. That's crazy. Like
how are you going to do that?" I'm in my
PhD having, you know, neuroscientists
like, "You're making the wrong decision.
What are you doing?" And people in my
personal life as well being like, "Who
told you you could do that?" Um and all
of those were honestly motivators for me
to prove them wrong.
Um but but yeah, I think, you know,
being delusional was kind of a
requirement for me because everything
that I wanted was something that I had
never seen done before. And then from
just kind of like the neuroscience
standpoint, right? Like
doubt is a dopamine destroyer.
Doubt is a dopamine destroyer. And so if
you have doubt in your dreams, I mean
you're not going to have the dopamine to
go and motivate you to do the thing that
you know you need to do. When I
graduated early for my PhD with my
masters and moved across the country, I
had 30,000 Instagram followers. I had no
reason to believe I was going to have
almost 2 million now. I just did it. And
I was like I was delusional. I was like
I'm just going to do this, but but it
was that delusional level of belief that
motivated me to do it. And I actually
remember when I was first starting out,
I I had I had met someone and this
person told me, "I know that you're
going to make it because of the belief
that you have." I know now that all of
the successful people when that when you
hear them speak it what that what do
they all have in common? It's the belief
that they have in themselves and in the
in their dreams. And I so I think that
sometimes it is delusional
because your reality your current
reality isn't reflecting to you what it
is that you're going after. And some the
kind of mindset that I've been, you
know, living in recently is like ignore
reality, move like it's already yours.
And that that can seem delusional to a
lot of people, but I think it it's
necessary because if you allow, you
know,
present setbacks or your present
circumstances to deter you or discourage
you, then you'll never make it. And so
in those moments where things aren't
going your way and maybe you're not
getting the results that you want. Maybe
your videos aren't going viral. Like I
had all these videos not doing whatever
and I still believed. Like I it was
crazy. Like looking back, I really was
delusional. But it's really so important
because I think a lot of us have this
experience where in the beginning we
face just so many times like most people
don't just immediately pop off into
immediate success. So many of us face
all of these challenges along the way
and have to believe through all of this
and and so I think that being delusional
absolutely is a pro level brain hack. I
mean it it it helps you unlock the power
of belief and belief is a biological
advantage. I mean they've shown in
studies that it improves performance,
boost confidence, makes you more likely
to succeed and get the thing that you
want and then it also boost dopamine,
right? And dopamine motivates you to
actually go and do it, right? If I
didn't if I'm sitting here and I don't
believe that I'm going to be able to
grow my for example social media
platform or I don't believe I'm going to
be able to write a good book,
why would my brain motivate me to go and
write write this book? Why would my
brain motivate me to go and do that? It
wouldn't. It wants to conserve energy
and if there's no reward perceived
reward or perceived outcome there, my
brain is not going to motivate me to go
and do it. So I mean having that
delusional belief of just like yeah,
it's going to work out. It's going to be
great and you know, really believing in
that
delusionally, right? Without that not
needing evidence because I think at
first we don't have evidence and I think
that's kind of what I mean when I'm
talking about being delusional is
believing without evidence.
Um and and I think a lot of times in the
beginning you might not have that
evidence and so it's kind of required.
>> I write about a lot of my work that
self-doubt is the biggest killer of
dreams and you're kind of backing this.
I'm curious. It sounds like belief is
required in order to become the greatest
version and accomplish your dreams.
What does neuroscience say
when you doubt yourself, when you say
negative things, when you say I'm not
sure if this is going to work out or you
doubt it's possible? What is
neuroscience saying is happening in your
brain and your body when you doubt?
>> I think there are multiple levels here.
I mean just the first part of doubting
yourself, I mean I I just said doubt is
a dopamine destroyer. So you're not
going to have the dopamine to go and do
the things, so you're not going to have
the motivation to go and do the things
that you need to do. But also
I like to give this analogy of imagine
you are walking around just day-to-day
life with somebody next to you 24/7
constantly telling you you can't.
Constantly telling you, "Ah, you're not
going to do that well. You're going to
do a bad job." What would that you'd be
you'd be constantly braced. You would
always be braced because this person is
just constantly tearing you down and
doubting you. You would always be
braced. You would never be able to
relax. And so that's kind of what
happens in your nervous system as well.
You're always kind of braced. That
disregulates you. When you're always I
mean really it's just negative thoughts
in general. If you're always beating
yourself up, tearing yourself down,
doubting yourself, then you're always
going to be in that braced state. And
that boosts cortisol, which boosts
stress. And I'm if you're disregulated
we haven't touched on this yet, but if
you are disregulated, if you are very
stressed, then you're going to see
increased activity in the amygdala. And
the amygdala is often associated with
fear and really being kind of the fear
and stress centers in the brain. And
when the amygdala is highly active, it
hijacks your perception as well, which
I've experienced in my life so many
times in my past where maybe I'm really
nervous, maybe I'm really stressed, and
I walk away from a conversation I'm like
"I said all these things wrong. Like I I
didn't do well enough. You know, what
did I do wrong?" And people around me
like, "Oh no, like you did great. Like
you did amazing. What are you talking
about?" And my perception of the
situation was literally inaccurate
because I was stressed, and my amygdala
was scanning my reality for potential
threats to keep me safe. So if we are
constantly doubting ourselves and having
this negative mindset or we just are
stressed in general
then our amygdala's going to hijack our
perception, and we're not even going to
be able to notice the opportunities or
the things that we want or the blessings
or the manifestations. We literally like
the thing that you want could walk in
the door, but your brain is filtering
for potential things that could go wrong
to keep you safe because that's the
state that your nervous system is in.
And and if you're always doubting
yourself and you're saying, oh, like I'm
not sure this is going to work out.
Well, well, your brain is going to
filter for reasons why that is true.
It's going to filter your reality to
confirm that belief. That's confirmation
bias. Your brain is always filtering
your reality to confirm the beliefs you
already have. And I remember learning
that you actually get dopamine, too,
when your brain confirms you hold. And
so even if it's negative. And so your
brain reinforces itself for being
negative and being and believing in the
wrong thing. And that's where, you know,
when you're like, oh, I knew that was
going to happen. Like when something
goes wrong and you're like, oh, I just
feel like, you know, it's not going to
work out and then it doesn't, you
actually get a mini dopamine hit from
being right even when it's not really
the thing that you want. And so
yeah, I mean, doubt impacts us in so
many different ways. I mean, I think we
all at times have little moments of
self-doubt creep in, but I like to I
like to do something called a resiliency
plan for those moments and like having
that developed
before it happens. And this is so many
different areas of my life now I have a
resiliency plan for lots of different
things. But, you know, for example, I
like to do my morning pages every
morning. I learned that from The
Artist's Way. It's very helpful. I'm a
huge fan of them. There was one time
where it brought up something and it
kind of made me feel anxious.
And I kind of stopped doing them for a
while because I didn't want to ruin a
bad day. I didn't want to ruin a bad
day. I was like, I don't want to feel
anxious. Like I don't want to start my
day off like that. But then
what I kind of realized and even worked
through with my coach was, no, you you
need to just have a resiliency plan for
when those moments do happen. Like what
are you going to do? And I decided, I'm
just going to move my body. I'm going to
move my body. I'm going to go exercise
because that always gets helps me reset.
And so having that plan as well for what
are what am I going to do in moments of
doubt? And I actually have a resiliency
plan for that. I have my friend
actually, she's still in her PhD, it's
where we met, and she has been just my
biggest believer, biggest supporter
since day one. Like, she was telling me
that I would be where I am when I didn't
believe that I would be where I am. And
she is just she's incredible. She's my
sister to me. And in those moments, you
know, a lot sometimes when I doubt,
like, she's the one that I call because
she's the one to smack me in the face
and be like, "What are you doing?
Questioning yourself?" And so, you know,
knowing what to do and having that plan
for what are you going to do when you
doubt yourself. Maybe it's affirmations,
maybe it's exercise and doing things
that make you feel more confident. Um I
have a kind of a collection of things
that I do now. Yeah.
>> You mentioned about your ADHD journey.
Did I read that you didn't take any
medication when you had ADHD and you
like just learned how to rewire your
brain?
>> So, I took it in the beginning.
>> Uh-huh.
>> And then I went to my PhD and I studied
drug addiction. So, I actually did, you
know, have this dream of studying drug
addiction, preventing relapse, and I
actually went and did that. So, I was
working in a in a research lab studying
drug addiction, working on identifying
new ways to treat and prevent relapse.
So, I was doing exactly what I said I
wanted to do. Which
>> [laughter]
>> Yeah, people were like, "Oh, I know." I
went and did just that. Like, within,
you know, anyway.
Um and so, but with that being said,
when I was studying drug addiction, uh
my minor was medical pharmacology cuz I
had to study drugs and how they work in
the brain and the nervous system.
And I just remember learning about, you
know, how they actually work. And
>> Drugs.
Or ADHD
>> Stimulants. ADHD medication. Adderall,
Vyvanse in particular. And when I
learned about how they actually work
and about, you know, side effects are
really actually just off-target effects
and they're real effects, they're not
side effects. They're
>> They're effects.
>> They're effects. [laughter] They're
effects. Yeah.
>> to happen.
>> And so, when
>> to happen.
>> Right. Right. And so, the goal of any
drug, right, is to mitigate off-target
effects while still providing, you know,
the the therapy that they're meant to
provide.
>> How do these ADHD drugs affect the
brain?
>> There are different types, but Adderall
in particular, it is a nervous system
stimulant, and so it essentially puts
you into fight or flight. And you're
just constantly into fight or flight.
And and and it makes
>> That can't be good, can it?
>> It it can't be. Right. And so, I mean,
it's it's it's just like a chronic
elevated cortisol, norepinephrine, and I
mean, and they're they've come out now,
and I saw recently a study where they're
saying, "Oh, we've we've figured out
that, you know, this medication, it
actually doesn't really boost focus, it
boosts alertness, wakefulness." And so,
that's really how they work is like they
make you super alert. Um and and that's
why, at least in my experience and the
experience of many people that I work
with, they don't necessarily help you
focus on the thing you need to focus on,
they just help you feel super motivated
and alert, and whatever you do after
that is your choice. And so, medication
would hit for me, and I'm on a hour-long
hours-long rabbit hole scrolling um like
online shopping or whatever, because
it's like whatever you're doing when
they hit is whatever you get locked in
doing. And so, I realized, "Okay, I
still need to develop agency and train
my ability to direct my focus, because
without that, I mean, the medications
weren't helping me necessarily direct
it."
>> Towards something productive, right?
Empowering.
>> So, when I learned that though, when I
learned how they work and just how they
impact the nervous system, and I I just
just made the personal decision to stop.
>> They're not good for the nervous system.
>> I stopped taking them.
>> brain.
>> I It's saying not good, I think depends.
I mean, I I don't want to be like, "Oh,
they're bad." And cuz they they they
helped me, and they were sort of a
crutch that allowed me to transition.
>> A crutch is not a long-term strategy.
>> strategy.
>> And if you get addicted to a crutch
long-term, that's not good. Like, when
do you get off the crutch? It's like,
how long should they be allowed to be
used for until they say, "All right, we
got to get to the root, not just
>> Right.
>> be the band-aids."
>> Similar to depression and anxiety,
right? You don't want to be on
depression medication your entire life,
right? You take that You take it for it
to be kind of that bridge to allow you
to do the inner work.
>> do you think actually
make the leap off the bridge into deeper
healing work from either ADHD or
depression medication? How many people
actually go deeper and get off of it?
>> I don't think many people do, but I also
don't think it's their fault because
it's not something that doctors tell you
to do.
>> Well, it's not profitable to be off of
drugs.
>> Right. So, when I was diagnosed with
ADHD, it was just like, "Okay, you have
ADHD. Here's the medication." No one
ever told me,
"You should also train your executive
function." Now, it takes a simple Google
search now that I know the term. If you
search executive function training and
ADHD, it's like
yes, at people
everyone should be doing especially now
with social media and like cheap
dopamine everywhere, but especially
people with ADHD, it's something that
should be done. And so And then yeah, I
also, you know, learning uh studying
drug addiction. And I On days I wouldn't
take Adderall, I was depressed because
my brain became dependent on the
dopamine from the medication.
>> That can't be good.
>> There Right, exactly. And it wasn't
good.
>> then you have to stay on it because now
you're depressed and then you have to
take depression medication if you go off
of it.
>> So I didn't want to be dependent on this
for the rest of my life.
>> So how did you learn how to not use
medication while having ADHD and
depressive thoughts?
>> I actually
used my knowledge of just how stimulants
work and I was like, "All right, well,
if I'm going to stop taking this, I am
going to supplement with caffeine for a
little bit." So, I actually kind of
transitioned using caffeine. And at
first, it was like, "Yeah." And I really
discovered also that green tea just
unlocked a whole new level for me that
coffee never did. Like coffee never
really made me feel any sort of way. And
I know a lot of people have ADHD that
feel similarly. Like coffee just doesn't
do it. Like I would drink like so many
shots of espresso, take stimulants, take
Adderall like all together. Like
>> Man.
>> Yeah, I know. No wonder why I
[laughter] nervous system was all over
the place. No wonder why I was like so
stressed, so anxious, so easily
triggered.
>> Wow.
>> Um yeah, and you know, I had like skin
issues, I had rashes, I had so many
different things going on because of all
of that. And so anyway,
also I was addicted to nicotine, which I
don't think I had mentioned to you, but
it was a big reason why I also wanted to
study drug addiction. But what I also
realized was that the Adderall and the
stimulants, they can in kind of increase
stereotypic behavior.
Um and that's just like a scientist term
for like compulsive, like repeated
behaviors, like stereotype behaviors. I
found that that was leading me to hit
the vape a lot. And so when I found that
when I stopped taking the Adderall, I
stopped craving nicotine as much. And so
it allowed me to just stop all of it.
But what I did was yeah, I I replaced
with I replaced with supplements and
green tea. And over time now, I mean, I
haven't even really had caffeine today.
So I I now I'm at this point where I
don't even take supplements for focus,
but in the beginning I did. So I took a
lot of different supplements for focus.
I would do like the lion's mane,
rhodiola rosea, cordyceps, you know,
ginseng, bacopa monnieri, like all
ginkgo, all the different things. I was
on it all. Uh and it helped. It really
did. And it allowed me to continue to
train my brain. And I really do think
that meditation was huge. You know, I
you can rely on all the external stuff,
but I remember the first time I noticed
meditation changing me
was I started, I think, the fall of my
senior year of undergrad. And then that
winter, like 3 months later, I had my
first PhD interview.
And I was sitting in that interview, and
I remember the person asking me a
question, and I was able to sit and
really think about the question that she
had asked me, and then respond
mindfully. And that might just sound
normal to a lot of people, but to me it
wasn't because the old version of me was
super reactive, super like as soon as
you say something, I got to immediately
blurt out a response to get it out of my
head. I would be super like interrupt
you and all the different things. And I
was like, "Whoa, I just was comfortable
in the silence there for a second." And
I was actually able to develop a
response and really truly respond rather
than react to situations. And it's that
skill that allows you to create the life
that you want. You have to be able to
respond cuz if you're reacting, it's
always going to be based on your
programming. It's always going to be
based on the old version of you. You're
you're never reacting as a new version
of you. Um cuz like reactions are that
kind of immediate impulsive behavior.
And so it really is developing that
ability to respond that allows you to
act as a new version of you. And so that
was the first time I had noticed
meditation changing my mind and my
brain. And now I just see it in so many
different areas of my life. Like if I
don't know where my keys are, I'm able
to just pause and and and literally
backtrack and oh, this is where my keys
are. I have two phones cuz one of them I
used to create content. And yesterday I
couldn't find the phone. I was like,
"Where's the phone?" And I paused and I
remember it was in a bag that I threw it
into when I was in my car earlier that
day cuz I didn't want it to be on the
seat. People would see it in the window.
That's where it is. It's in that random
bag that's in the hallway over there.
And just little things like that I
notice now. I'm like, "Oh wow, like I'm
just able to unlock this different level
of my mind."
>> Mhm.
>> What do you think is the root cause of
bad addictions in life?
Like alcohol, drugs, you know, I don't
know, porn, vaping, like what do you
think is the root cause?
What does neuroscience say is the root
cause of a bad addiction?
>> I don't want to say that I know what the
root cause is for everyone because for
me when I started vaping nicotine, there
wasn't really a cause. It was just, "Oh,
my friends are doing it and so I'm going
to do it." Everyone around me was doing
it so I'm going to do it. I wasn't
necessarily trying to fill any void or
like it's just, "Oh, hey, like I was
just a silly little teenager, you know."
>> you had ADHD, you had depressive
thoughts, you thought about taking your
own your life. So, there was something
underneath you weren't like, "I'm a
happy person and I'm going to do this
addiction."
>> seeking out something outside of you to
give you dopamine to make you feel
better.
>> Exactly.
>> Right.
>> [laughter]
>> So, yes, you were pressured. Right, why
did I continue to do it? Because I like
I'm like, "Oh, I like it." But also, I
had all these other, you know,
maladaptive behaviors of partying and
drinking and doing all those things.
>> environment, sure, that was the drug of
choice because your friends were vaping.
But it maybe would have been alcohol if
it was you were older or whatever, I
don't know, but
underneath, what is the neuroscience
underneath an addiction? Is it trauma?
>> Right, it's kind of seeking out
something outside of you to make you
feel better because that's what addict
That's what drug All drugs of abuse
boost dopamine.
In the reward centers of the brain, all
of them.
>> They make you feel better.
>> Yeah.
>> When you don't feel good, something
inside of you feels awful.
>> But what's so interesting about drugs,
especially addictive drugs, is that in
it's only in the beginning that they
make you feel good and then over time,
your dopamine system actually shifts to
where you don't even necessarily get
that pleasure from doing it anymore.
You're actually just doing it to avoid
discomfort.
Um and that's when, you know, addiction
really sets in is, you know, over time
it's not I'm hitting the vape vape
because it feels good and I'm getting
dopamine, it's I'm hitting it because
I'm anxious if I don't. And that sort of
starts to happen right when our brain
becomes dependent and our neurochemistry
actually adapts to using this drug
because that's what it does, it adapts.
Like over time, your receptors sort of
learn this new behavior. It's like,
"Okay, if we're always getting dopamine
from this, like let me down regulate
dopamine receptors and that way we're
less sensitive to it." And now it's like
you literally need the drug to get to
get that pleasurable experience and then
you start to Yeah, so your brain
literally becomes dependent on that
thing in order to maintain a baseline
homeostatic state. And then that's why
that's where withdrawal happens when you
don't have it. So, it only really feels
good in the beginning and like something
as simple that maybe most people can
relate to is social media. Um in the
beginning, I remember when I first went
on like Facebook when I was younger, in
the beginning you went on cuz it was
cool and fun. You get to see your
friends and talk and and then it gets to
this point where you're on your phone
and you're on social media and you don't
even know how you got there. It's like
you're it's like an automatic behavior
and it becomes a stimulus response
behavior where initially
when we do things that like drugs or you
know, social media or any sort of
gambling, whatever it is, um you do it
because it's it's a goal-directed
behavior. Like you're doing it for a
reason, whether it be to feel better, um
get dopamine, you know, maybe it could
even be as simple as, you know, I'm I I
want to stay close in with people in
this friend group, whatever it is. Um
and then over time, it develops into a
stimulus response relationship where you
see it, you do it and it becomes saved
into like the habit centers of your
brain. So,
>> Don't get addicted to drugs.
>> Yeah, don't do
>> [laughter]
>> Don't do Don't
>> Don't get addicted to it. It's going to
be hard to get off. You've accomplished
a lot of your dreams that you envisioned
years ago for yourself. You know, you
you overcame the limiting beliefs that
you had in a lot of areas. You overcame
a victim mindset, a scarcity mindset.
And to have what you said, like all
these amazing things in your life, this
business, the relationship, the house,
the car, all these things that you
imagined having.
If you could go three to five years in
the future,
what is the limiting belief you'll need
to let go of in order to be the human
you want to be at the highest version
then?
>> I think just the first belief that comes
to mind maybe is that I need to do more
>> Mhm.
>> to get more.
>> Mhm.
>> And it's definitely something that I
have experienced in the past where it's
not always about doing more. It is
always about though getting your energy
right and having your energy in
alignment and just really just being in
your joy and and just feeling your best.
I I've had so many times where
I'm maybe having a stressful week and
there are a couple of days where I'm
taking life super seriously and I'm you
know, I got the grip on the wheel of
life and then I make a plan to go see my
best friend and I'm in the car and I
immediately just feel better. I'm like
wow, like this is going to be so fun.
I'm so excited. And then all of a sudden
I get an email about an opportunity and
like the thing comes and it's just like
wow, it really does come to you when you
feel good.
>> Yeah, when you're living in joy.
>> Right. And so I think for me, you know,
just getting to this like next level and
this other thing it maybe isn't always
about doing more, but how can I feel my
best and making that the number one
priority.
>> That's great. That's great.
I've got a couple final questions for
you before we get to the the last couple
ones. I want to people to check out
everything you're up to. You got great
social media content. They can go to
your website M on the Brain on social
media m on the brain.com.
You've got a coaching program called
Minecraft as well. A lot of other cool
stuff. You got a book coming out in the
future. We'll have to have you come back
on when that book is coming out. Uh but
people can sign up for your newsletter
and subscribe everyone on social media M
on the Brain if you guys want more great
content. This is a question I ask
everyone towards the end. It's called
the three truths. You're what? 27? Is
that all you are? So imagine you get to
live, you know, past a hundred.
And
imagine the next, you know, 70 plus
years that you get to
design and live exactly where you want
it to be.
Every dream happens.
Everything you want comes true.
But at the end of the day, the last day
on Earth for you,
you have to take all of your work with
you. Everything you've ever created,
written, spoken, videos, they all have
to go go the next place. They're not
here in this world anymore.
But, you get to leave behind three
truths to the world. Three things you
feel like you know to be true
as lessons that you would leave behind.
What would those truths be?
>> First is to live in your joy.
>> Mhm.
>> Live in your joy.
As long as you're living in your joy,
then you're enjoying life. And life is
about the journey. If it were about the
destination, it'd be called death. So,
>> [laughter]
>> I I I think that's like if you're living
in your joy, then it doesn't really
matter what you achieve. It it's you're
happy. And I think living in your joy as
often as you possibly can is so
important. Um and also like like joy is
a performance enhancer. So, I mean,
you'll do better, you'll be better, and
you'll have more fun doing it. So,
living in your joy will be number one.
Number two
is that you are the creator of your
life.
You are the creator of your life.
And I think, you know, anyone could take
that and extrapolate it and, you know,
apply it to themselves and it's not
meant to be, you know,
you need to do this, but more of just
like you are the creator of your life
and you can do anything. I guess that's
number three is you can do anything you
set your mind to. Like you really can.
Like never forget how powerful you are.
And maybe that's four, but I think that,
you know,
we it's so easy to forget how powerful
we are. And it comes down to just
something as simple as literally driving
in the car and remembering, oh wait, I'm
extremely powerful. I can just be like,
an unexpected blessing or opportunity is
going to come to me today. And all of a
sudden my brain shifts and now all of a
sudden my energy shifts and then all of
a sudden
I'm laying in bed that night and I'm
like, whoa, that thing happened today.
Or maybe I notice it during the day and
I'm like, whoa. But, you know, it's
little moments like that that just
remind you, yeah, I'm so powerful. It's
like, why And it's so easy to forget cuz
I think it's just not common and
everybody out there isn't talking about
it. You don't walk around and then I
It's actually one of the reasons why I
love Arizona is just because it's super
common there. Like everybody is very
spiritual. Um but it's just not common
when we walk around, people aren't like,
"You're so powerful, like you can do
anything." And it's just like, "Oh yeah,
the power of the mind." And it's just so
easy to forget that. And every time I
remember it, it just immediately
relieves so much stress as well, and
just allows me to relax into life. So,
those would be my things.
>> Living the dream, Emily. I want to
acknowledge you for everything you've
created. You're making a big impact in
the world. You're constantly showing up
in your joy.
And there's a lot of people that aren't
as consistent as you. And I think
taking what you've learned from
neuroscience in school and starting to
apply it by sharing it while in the
practice,
a lot of people wait and say, "Let me
wait till I get my degree. Let me wait
till I have all these credentials to
start sharing." And you just said, "I'm
going to share what I'm learning
personally and what I'm learning in
school, and put it out there." So, I
want to acknowledge you for being on
that journey and being of service
and not waiting to share your gifts with
the world. It's really cool what you're
up to. So, congrats on everything.
>> Thank you.
>> Congrats on the engagement and the
business, everything you're up to. It's
really cool.
Uh, final question, what's your
definition of greatness?
>> Living as your favorite version of
yourself.
>> There you go. Emily McDonald, thank you.
Appreciate it.
>> But when dopamine is released in our
[music] brain,
we
first of all, it tends to orient us
towards
goals in the outside environment.
[music] It's the It's the molecule not
just of reward, but of motivation. And
when we [music] release dopamine, we
tend to see the world in terms of
external goals.