The Lesson Jet Li Spent His Entire Life Learning

I was 2 years old. My daddy passed away. [music] My mom only 34 years old. Raising my two older sister, two older brother, me, five children. 8 years old, I start learning martial arts. You got a little money. >> Yeah. >> Now you can help mom. I know if I can keep it, get a champion and I can get more money to take care the family. I try [music] so hard. Jet, one of the most iconic martial artists and film stars in the world. He was a national martial arts champion in China. He helped bring Chinese martial arts cinema to the world. Life is a big movie. >> Yes. >> You're you're the actor. You're the writer. [laughter] >> Right. Right. >> You're direct. Everything only you will take it in the future. 5,000 years history. What you learned is the material change. The mental is similar. >> Love story, family, take care. You know >> this emotion didn't change a lot. There's something meditative about martial arts, >> more philosophy, more thinking because they use not external physical part. You need the internal they call the chi, you know, how to concentrate. >> So the study of Buddhism came later for you. >> Yeah. When I was uh 34, I become really really Buddhist to understand living and death. What's the end? Where [music] it come from, where it goes, how to solve this lifetimes. when you're through that journey until one day you want to save. >> I thought the book was really good. >> Thank you. [laughter] >> I was reading about your boyhood. It feels like there was basically pressure on you from day one. >> Yes. [laughter] >> Yes. >> How did that feel? Was it heavy >> or did you get used to it? I used to it because when I was a little boy I don't know anything about you know I was two years old my daddy passed away so family very poor my mom only 34 years old to reing my two older sister two older brother me five children you know >> so very heavy yeah the family then for I remember already say I need to try my best >> to helping my mom helping my mom you know that's why I quite naughty you know I have little with it and then 8 years old I start learning martial arts then I try my best and then you got a little money >> then you can help mom it's very important very important then I know if I can keep it get a champion and I can get more money to take care the family I tried so hard in 1970s I got a five-year champion martial art in mainland China and also it's nice things if I'm do good job and I can represent mainland China to you know travel around the world in 1974 I come states the first time >> I did a you know kung fu demonstration in many city include the white house doing the kung fu for president Nickerson and each time you represent China people. Now you got a more money. A lot of money. >> I heard Nixon asked you to be his bodyguard. >> Yeah. [snorts] Yes. I was 11. He said in the warehouse rose garden, I think. >> Yeah. He's not there anymore. Yeah. Gung fu de man, you know, after I did show the kung fu and she said, "Wow, you're gungu pretty good. You grew up. You you can become my bodyguard." >> Of course, they translate to me. I say no I want to protect billion people not one [laughter] that's the case just thinking that way >> yeah so did you did you love martial arts or was it for you like a way out a means to an end like like did you did you love doing it or was it the pressure that's putting you there >> in the beginning I don't know anything about the martial arts not I don't love it first degrade in summertime you know send all the children they go to sports school and if you're tall enough you can play basketball [laughter] you know volleyball uh some people running so fast now you go to there I'm quite short they say oh this group people learning martial art okay >> so you're getting funneled into different sports based on how old were you >> uh 8 years old >> and they're deciding your future at 8 years old basically >> yes but my master tell me later on he says my normal school teacher already say There have a one boy >> he's a good look in the physical very good control and he he must learn martial art is good. So after one month summer school so there have thousand students so the my coach only pitch me keep in the martial art team. >> Wow. And then you know after a year I got a quite good then I slightly slightly love martial arts because they have a very strong philosophy. >> Well that's what I was going to ask. Do you think the coach saw your physical potential or do you think he saw something in you mentally and spiritually like what do you think he saw in you that that made him think this is the kid you got to train? I think both way >> one is you control your body you know also they look you thinking I'm the case like a independent thinking yeah a lot not only you tell me do thousand times thousand times I just follow the rule I don't want to yeah >> I said why I just do 700 better than thousand what what's the key words I always thinking always thinking that also you know learning martial arts they have three key words just like you you you have energy you can calm down concentrate then you use internal energy show physical I have a special three words >> then they thought I have that quite special with same age all the children's >> where do you think that came from do you think it's is it biological like is it is it >> genetic or Or is it something you you were taught as a kid? Like where do you think it came from? >> At that point I when I was young I don't know but later on when I study you know especially I'm special study Buddhism. >> Yeah. >> Then there I believe there must be something in the past. >> Yeah. >> That's why you learn everything faster than normal age people. >> Right. And you have a very familiar control the body to show different way. >> Yeah. >> And uh I think I believe so. >> Do you know who Patton was the the American general? There's a famous movie patent about him. He's a famous World War II general. >> Mhm. >> But he wrote this poem where he believed he fought in World War II and World War I. But he he wrote this poem where he believed that he was the reincarnated spirit of every generation of warriors. Like there's a famous scene in the movie, but it did happen in real life where in real life he's at a Civil War battlefield >> and he's like describing it to the historian >> and [clears throat] the historian's like, "No, that's not how it went." And he says, "No, no, I was here as a boy." Which he wasn't, but he felt that he was. And then and then an actual Civil War veteran comes to the scene and he says, "No, no, he's right. That's how it went." He had this sense that there was generations of sort of past fighters in him. Do you feel like you have some? >> Yes, I I think so. Because in mainland China, martial art is Chinese tradition. I think last year they calculated again is almost 80 million people learning. Wow. Still there. Yeah. When I was little is still telling uh 80 million were 100 million people learning martial arts. How can you're so young boy? You you you have a special and you're doing the same movement, same coach. >> Yeah. >> But you >> you learn it faster. >> You're faster. You're different style. Everybody saw you then they say, "Wow, this guy must have a talent." Yes. They only use Star Wars. Oh, maybe he's too talent. Yeah. So learning. And also you know later on I learned Buddhism or Buddhism you know I figure out why I'm so special why people like me you know movement on the screen on the real you know fighting different style maybe you know the people like me maybe in the past I help more people I help a lot people using martial arts yeah >> helping people >> but maybe I did some mistake hurt the wrong people that's why I got a lot injured you know >> you take the good >> you take the bad in the reincarnation that's why I didn't complain a lot >> right now but in the 30s I always think why I'm so unlucky each way I make it and I broke my arm broke my leg you know yeah >> why nobody like me you know always got injured then when I more than 35 I learning Buddhism I said [clears throat] maybe I help a lot of people that's why people love me. >> Yeah. >> Then maybe I do something wrong. >> You also committed some crimes. >> I've heard of some people that it's okay. I take it if I have energy I can control I can you know pay it back is good. >> So the study of Buddhism came later for you. >> Yeah. When I was 34 I study become really really Buddhist >> really. But the beginning I made my first movie called the Shaolin temple. >> Yeah, >> that is a big hit in Ming and China in the whole Asia make me career changed become actor. But I when I went to the temple I just saw very peaceful very happy. >> Yeah >> just something yeah I come before you know familiar this this this. Yeah >> there was something about it that spoke to you. >> Yeah. >> But how long between that movie and your study? Many years. 17 years later I become Buddhist. >> Yeah. >> But in the beginning because I learning martial arts I also very like uh theism. >> Yes. Because they call in and yang you know you t your protect you know but so that philosophy make me independent thinking are more are more because you know different age different area in the world people have a different kind of thought >> so that's why you think oh maybe I'm think the white you black black or white you know different way maybe I like a cold water people like hot other that's why this is different. >> Yeah. >> So you need to understand now there no nothing 100% equal or something there. I feel like in the modern west there's kind of a distinction between philosophy and say martial arts or sports brain and brawn as they said you know like but but it it seems like in in the east historically and in a more modern sense the philosophy and the martial arts are are more intertwined. >> Yes. Much deeper because at our school there are different kind of sports right. Yeah. The people if they learn basketball, you know, volleyball, whatever, they just physical control, concentrate only. >> Yeah. >> But martial art, we need to learn why you attack this way, why you attack way, how to protect yourself, how to >> revenge something this later on, you know, I start become actor, martial art movie always there have some more strong philosophy. >> Yeah. You know, >> there's something meditative about martial arts. I feel like that's maybe different than golf or or >> more philosophy, more thinking because they use not external physical part. You need the internal they call the chi, you know, how to use, how to sharp, >> how to concentrate. Also, they believe not just you can really easily to beat up someone. >> Yeah. But you'll never change their mind. >> So how to use convince them stop them violent and change to become good person. >> You know if only the sports Yeah. You just beat them up you win your team champion. That's good enough. Yeah. >> But martial art is always not that simple. >> Yes. >> Yeah. What what's that? You use a word in the beginning of the book. I thought it was interesting. Zai. >> What does that mean? On the philosophy part, I think everything we describe a yin and yang. >> Yeah. >> Like a cold, hot, this and this. >> So when I talk about the freedom, that means you're something cost, not freedom. >> Sure. >> You think I need a freedom because I'm not freedom. That means at the same time, >> yes, >> I want this because you don't have it. That's why you want it. >> So you think you get this, you will be happier. >> Yeah. >> More freedom. I'm happier. more power, more money and be this. But it's really really the way if that sample is much easier. >> But then when I grow up, you see a lot of people maybe they're more power, more stronger, more money, but they >> they have their problem. They have their suffering. >> Yeah. >> So if you have a goal, you always have problem. You always cut. There's something you don't have that you want. >> Yeah. So that's why and I think more talk about what we need and what we want is two things. Everybody afraid about the life and the young and old even death. So everybody try to secured. >> Yeah. >> They want more >> but they only need that much. Sure >> they want that much [laughter] >> you know then they even me I confused what I want what I need >> always miss up [laughter] >> so later on you if you truly understand life then you will know what do you need that's >> very important >> after that just what you want doesn't mean anything because the end of the day you cannot keep them go >> you need to them to the world left to the next generation ation. >> Yeah. >> So they're not the white not the black. So they have something middle words because words is too limit too limited. >> Mhm. >> Cannot describe. >> Yeah. >> Because if I say I have more freedom that means you before you you're less freedom. No is everything okay. Okay is okay not okay also okay. the result you see everything results you respect >> and I think you you said it it's connected to the idea of presence which is just being in the moment that you're in not wanting or regretting or worrying or >> like a so be it that's why my daughter and I have so be it >> oh just come out so be it okay everything okay >> because >> people just like I'm making movie in the as you always think you try your best then the result must be best. >> Sure. >> Yeah. You you you try your best sometime work sometimes. those. >> Well, that that would be interesting, right? Because yeah, you're the actor in a movie, so you could do a great job, >> but you don't control the other actors. You don't control the director, you don't control the marketing. >> You also you can control the audience, >> right? Yeah. Exactly. >> Somebody like it this part. >> Sure. >> Somebody that like that part. >> Sure. So that's why I think the result probably three things can describe >> good >> bad so if I respect three things >> no problem at all >> sure >> but the problem is I only care about the good >> you want one which means that if the other two happen then you're upset or disappointed or sat angry >> yes >> or or someone can take good from you by ruining it >> and you're vulnerable that's natural If you have this >> probably people have this idea you know just a percentage maybe this more than 50% is good. >> Yeah >> you cannot ask people 100% like you no no one in the world 100% people support you there. So when you understand more things than just so be it you hate me I know I understand your angle you like me I appreciate I understand your level you're you know you're thinking in the middle say so also I understand so if you open your heart you respect everything you don't complain you know it's okay >> so one of the stoic philosophers his name is Epictitus who I I write quite a bit about he he would talk about how we're all actors in in a play. Yes. Right. We don't get to choose the role that we're cast in. We're cast in a role and then we have to act that part as well as possible. We don't control if it has a lot of speaking parts or only a few speaking parts, if it's the villain or if it's the celebrated laugh line. Like all we can do is play our role as best we can and we have to detach from the results a little bit because sometimes the audience loves you and sometimes they don't. >> Yeah. And for my understanding right now is not just making movie the life is big movie. >> Yes. >> You're you're the actor, you're the writer, right? [laughter] >> You're the you know performance you do direct everything because the result only >> you will take it in the future. >> And look sometimes you can be a good actor in a bad movie. >> Yes. Yes. >> And what you don't want to be is a bad actor in a good movie. >> Yes. Everything you can you you understand just acting you know you try to what I learned is training the mind is important you need to help more people understand them. >> Yeah. So then you opened it that so be it everything okay I understand yeah I hope you're happy I hope you healthy that's the way >> well and how how can you make sure that the goal that you have when you go into a project this is something that stokes talk about too the other metaphor he uses he says if you only run races where winning is up to you you will always win >> and so his point is like if if you go into a movie and the goal is this has to make a certain amount of money >> well that might not happen right other other things impact whether that happens. But if you go into a movie or a project or a conversation and you say, "I want to do my best. I want to have fun. I want to learn something." You know, these are all things that you get to decide whether they happen or not. >> Yes. >> And so deciding what the goal is and trying to root that goal into something that's not based on other people as much as possible. >> Yeah. Yeah. You know they have a different age the audience different age different languages different maybe religion so they like something they don't like something just like all the material put on the table say here's the coffee here's the water this wine take like doesn't mean this is right this wrong this is >> so I think >> most important for me is I training martial arts >> through my almost the whole life >> control the move the body that's I call is a healthy part >> healthy I thought western a lot of people learning how to keep their body running you know fate look good but I think mentally training is also very important is the part of life >> happy is the mental >> yes >> healthy is the physical healthy I think more important that's why I want to share uh I read Chinese book. This is the first English book and try to share how to training. >> Well, a lot of Yeah, a lot of people go to the gym, they run on the treadmill, they lift weights, >> but they do no mental training whatsoever. >> But if we don't do the mental training, you don't know how to control the happy who calls you not happy. >> If you know why is cause you unhappy then you solve that then you can become more happy >> also because in you know technology improve a lot. I think re in the near future maybe five 10 20 years healthy is not a big problem. Maybe people can go 200 years old >> but if mal not strong and enough you lose balance. >> You push your mind in the 200 years then you say wow I need a lot of moving to make it a lot of working to do it. Ah what happens you know. >> Sure. Yeah. If suddenly everyone lived to be 100 >> Mhm. >> but we didn't make any improvements as far as the the mental side of things >> Mhm. >> that just means you're unhappy for longer. >> That's worse. >> Yes. [laughter] >> The idea of of health being fixed is really only part of the equation. If you're out of balance with the the mental, if you don't have resiliency and you know the things that you train the mental side for. >> Yes. Because I learning martial arts. That's why I always thinking especially in China we say 500 5,000 years history what you learned is you don't make the same mistake in your 100 years life but you never know the future >> so long a lot of things h happen you didn't prepared >> then you will easily get hurt get something in the future >> there's a line from an American president that I like he says uh the only thing new is the history you don't know. >> Yeah. >> And so, yeah, when you look at 5,000 years of tradition >> Mhm. >> Sure, there's some technological advancements, but basically people have been struggling with the same things for 5,000 years. >> Yes. The emotion part. >> Yes. >> Mental part, same thing. Love, family, children, husband, you know, wife, >> you know, how to work, sake, diet. >> But the material may changed. Before you rent a horse, you know later on you have a car, now you have a different kind of car. You you don't need to drive. In the future, maybe you have clothes, everything you go to New York, you know, easily. So the material change the mental is similar love story, family, take care, you know, this emotion didn't change a lot. That's why we need >> I think in the near future my is more important than the this part. this part of technology lot of company a lot of people already doing it. >> Yeah. As society becomes more prosperous and yeah you're not a subsistence level farmer >> actually the emotional stuff becomes more important because there's more room for it. You're not just if you're spending 14 hours a day in the field. You don't have a lot of time to stress about some of these emotional and mental things. But but as that takes up less and less time in a weird way the other stuff >> takes up more space. >> Yes. And you think about it and I work in I think of 15 years ago I work with >> I work for >> two terms I each turn two years ambassador you know try to promote >> things. Then that time they already tell me uh you know the heart attack to cause human death is is the number one and cancer number two mentally >> maybe number three but they say 10 years later future mental will be number one. >> Sure cuz you can cure the other things. >> Yes the heart you know the technology AI they can sure >> maybe in next 10 20 30 years cancer maybe can cure you know and other things. So my mental very important. So people right now I think a lot of people you especially city a lot of young people take maybe 30 minutes every day training their body. >> Yeah. >> Then I want to share say wow >> what about 3 minutes to take care your mental training every day from the little little you know >> concentrate you know the my is training. >> What does your mental training look like? What do you do? When I was a little boy, you know the just like a athlete. >> You need to focus, you know, you go outside to performance, people like you. You don't >> how do you tune it out? >> You don't think about it. >> Evil yelling at you, you know, through [laughter] something, you know, you do your best on the street. >> Yeah. >> On the performance. That's a little bit, you know, if too hard, you need to try harder, harder, harder. Yeah, you also very simple training but you know later on you know making movies you have I have philosophy training and especially I become Buddhist then training you then you will understand more what cause you and not happy >> what cause you suffering >> right >> it's us we're the cause it's never out here >> then you need to understand that people say something they like you where They don't like you. Why you be happy? Why you angry? >> Yeah. >> The sound where you come from? How to work inside? You look something you're happy. Why you look at something happy? >> The flexction change your mind. How do you happy? If you can find all the problem, how can cost? Yeah. >> Then you can solve them. You can clear [clears throat] it. >> One of the ideas from the stoics. I'd be curious what you think. This also comes from Epictitis. He says, "It's not things that upset us. It's our opinion about things. >> Yes. >> Right. The it's out there, but it's when it comes through and we process it through here, that's where the >> that was offensive, that was mean, that was hurtful. >> Yes. >> That was amazing. You said I was all that's our interpretation of it. >> Yeah. Then your deep training because they have a six six sense how to you know communicate with outside what you hear what you smell what you think and the Buddhism they have a seven and eight >> involved seven is your opinion different with the others every everybody seven is different you know eight is a maybe you learn something put there it's oh so I am familiar something you know reincarnation Oh, sure. >> Does something stay in there like a more than words? Maybe like a cloud. Yeah, like uh usually I saw that you know you have a cell phone just like your body you change all your cell phone every two years 3 years but >> the data is >> the data is still there >> right >> who's your friend who's the same thing that's the software so that's why I say both side we need to understand how to work >> and make you understand when you see everything is possible >> then you not disappointed because you respect already >> and you're not surprised because you you knew that was one of the outcomes. >> Yeah. The people sometime you grow up you case you only see this things after this too bad you cannot say wow I'm like oh too special you know you wouldn't open it see everything it's okay >> saka who's another one of the stokes he said the reason you want to think about all the things that could happen >> so you're not surprised he he says the analogy is that the unexpected punch hurts more >> that the unexpected blow lands heaviest >> and so the analogy I guess for fighting is you want to think, well, they could hit me from this side. They could come from over here. Right? And it's not to make you paranoid, but it's so you don't get caught off guard. It's when we're surprised when when we didn't even conceive of someone not appreciating what we're doing or that they could laugh at us or whatever. Then when it happens, we're devastated. >> Yeah. So that's why in the book I write down my English not good enough. I try to explain you know there have a small jelly in the beginning just like everybody work you myself like a center >> I do martial arts make money take care of my family I do something I'm special everything is me me it's a lot of suffering a lot of struggling pressure and I had a tsunami in 2004 with my whole family you know two daughter almost died so >> in Indonesia the >> uh Maldives uh just 2004 four. >> You were there. You were on the beach. >> I'm in the motives. >> Ah. >> Uh 800 I think more than 800 miles there. But 1 hour later we get a hit. So the water is here. My Jada, my little boy, a little girl one years old take by the water. I hold my older four years old sister. Nothing to do. Even people think you're the mushroom guy. You know the physical. But in the nature when they come >> fly a wave >> you cannot you cannot fight. So since then I changed say I need to do something helping the society people like me give me the big name I want to help them. So I started a foundation in China to help more people in the disaster. So I ask everybody donate one yen per month like 12 cents dollar >> per month put it together. So after 18 years we helped 62 million people. >> Wow. >> Uh we racing fund is uh almost 5 billion R&B. 5 billion. So help more people just put a little everybody a little bit little bit little bit together they change. But through that journey I'm so happy but also more painful more suffering. >> Yeah. >> Because you have a goal. >> Yeah. >> You help million. You want to help two million. >> Sure. You have to do the same >> same thing even they say I not work for J not work for me but you doing the same thing on the other foundation the other things so same something that's big J also suffering so [laughter] that's why end of the day in past maybe 10 years I study strongly study Buddhism Buddhism and then try to figure out know me >> you know me >> to take your ego out >> know me if know me everything is >> that's come okay >> that's okay the sample I make the sample just like I'm in the water when somebody threw the stone to me I will refund >> but later on you have big you you know they they don't like J they like JD they put a stone in the water they have a >> ripples yeah >> you can feel it you're angry but you don't want to re revenge But later on now I try to learn is you threw the stone in the air the ear doesn't matter who yeah >> be careful hurt that people be careful the stone back hurt you because there are no point >> then just less happy less suffering less everything both side then that's called >> and do you have a meditation practice do you meditate >> yes 30 years meditate ation is the one kind of skill but meditation is not a goal. go is if you in the learning beginning you have a different kind of meditation different kind of class people normally people think meditation just do nothing do thinking [clears throat] they have a lot of things to do yes >> you know steps >> there's a lot of stuff you got to clear out first >> yeah clear what cause until later on meditation can help you different kind of goal >> really depends the goal where you want to go then you learn what kind of meditation Then there have many many skills I call the many many tools. >> Yeah. >> You can use ear to meditate listen you can looking meditation uh >> walking meditation >> walking meditation drinking meditation many many ways. >> Yeah. >> Then that is the simple easy to understand and using for daily life. >> Yeah. >> Yeah. And I I feel like more in the martial arts world like again we we in America it's like so are big and tough you know the athletes but like you know there were samurai warriors that like to to do the gardening or the painting or the tea cere there's something kind of slow and meditative about it traditionally >> that is very beautiful which is a meditative experience right the the trimming of the bonsai tree or the the the haikus you know the the different kinds of sort of artistic means of getting to that that quieter calmer place. >> Mhm. I think for I learning martial arts first step is a physical skill. >> Yeah. >> Your internal external angry everything revenge whatever you want to get a goal. >> Yeah. >> You need a physical become >> very high level. >> Yeah. >> Sometime we talk about your sore. You're holding the sore sore if is your body. >> Yes. >> You people cannot you know sore and you in the together. >> Yeah. >> Mason together >> to become one. >> Become one. >> Next level you don't need a sore. >> Yeah. >> You need a physical very strong and before fighting you try to stop them. >> Yeah. >> Don't fight me. >> Yeah. >> Don't fight me. I will get you. I will got you. I will hurt you. So that level that level better than hurt people. >> Yeah. >> The second level is heart. You still have a sorrow in the heart >> but not physical. >> Yes. >> Sort. And the third level you don't have a sore inside the heart. You don't have a s. You try to helping more people. Yeah. >> You try to convince >> this way. Keep balance. Everybody be friends. Everybody you know this way. It's quite close to highest philosophy or religions. They're helping each other. We're not easy living in the earth helping brother sisters. Don't fight. >> Do you think some of that comes from confidence? Right. So it's like >> you know you can >> and then you realize you don't need to and then you realize that actually your highest use is of service. >> Yeah. Of course you also different age young have a lot of energy want to get this. I try to prove difference. I am so strong. >> I want to get >> something. Yeah. Yeah. Then you get it more confidence, more understanding life. 30s, you you think about, wow, they have reason, you have a reason. Yeah. Then until later on, you think, wow, >> I don't really need that >> much. >> You know, three meal a day went bad covering good enough. Yeah, >> I don't need that much. I don't want Don't put a want become neat. >> Right. a lot of people still confuse want and need. >> And it's also I think it's easier to have that clarity when you've gotten a lot of the things that you've wanted because then you realize it wasn't that great and you also I think you have the confidence that you're like I did it. You know it like there's something about like if you were 20 and you were like I don't need anything. >> You you're not actually saying that from a place of knowing. There's like, you know, the story about sour grapes, like where you're like, "Oh, I didn't want it anyway." >> There's something like until you've had it or you've gotten up close to it, >> you can't really know that you don't need it. >> Yes. >> Cuz it's not based on experience. >> Something Yes. Something maybe not. >> Yeah. >> Because I'm 34. I'm quite okay in Asia. >> Mhm. >> You know, actor, famous action actor. You got something you want. >> Yeah. But you look up American there's always another there are many many levels to go. >> So after entertainment actor there have a lot of businessmen so market a lot of rich people you never go that high. >> Yeah. >> So >> doesn't mean you need to go that high you understand. Yes you there you need to think about wow what do I need? What do I want? If I don't understand then end of the day 70 years old I'm still say I want more. You didn't have to conquer the entire world to know that it's not that important. >> Yes, I think your point is right also right is secured. What do you need? >> Yeah, >> that's very important. Secure say wow that's I need I need this. After that you need to think big picture. >> Yeah. >> If you don't understand if you are the billionaire billionaire you still think I want more. I want more. I'm struggling. Right. It's still there. That's why I think I need to understand where living in the earth. >> Yeah, >> that's a maybe three dimension. >> I think I think that >> in philosophy and in meditation, you know, often times if you're an ambitious person, >> Mhm. >> a lot of what you're wrestling with there is how to turn that volume down. Not off, >> but down a little bit. >> Yes. Maybe just sometime you kick kick back your reincarnation the thinking come back say look at >> if you go that journey end of day you're still suffering you need to understand >> now you think about then you find a different you >> yes >> the book can help you some maybe movie some something you got more information more book to understand living and death what's the end where it come come from where it goes how to solve this lifetimes when you're through that journey until one day you want to say wow >> I hope more people understand earlier like my daughter you should understand earlier and less suffering in your life right be happy understand that's why we share we want to share >> sure >> then we don't know really can help more people or not doesn't matter I think and that's I say to my teachers say if the can help one person two three I'm so happy >> yes >> if more I'm also happy >> yes >> I don't need a goal if I had a goal >> big go back to the beginning >> more than zero but it doesn't have to be a certain number >> yeah that's I I'm not a good teacher I don't want to teaching people I just say I'm like a you normal ball boy I through my life journey learning the physical part mental part I want to share my experiences to everybody If you like it, take it free. If you don't like it, it's okay. >> There's a different wheel to see the our life and include future the technology will hit us very very quickly. >> Yeah. >> I did this book a couple years ago about ego >> and and and a friend of mine who trains in martial arts was saying something that I thought you might like. He was saying that ego is like a floor. You sweep the floor, you get it clean, right? As we're always trying to push ego away, >> and then a week later it's dirty again. [laughter] >> That you have to always be sweeping the floor. You have to always be sort of doing the spiritual practice to to get the, as you were saying, to take the me out of it. That it's not something you do once. You don't meditate once and go, hey, I don't need to be the center of the universe. It doesn't last. It's a constant process. From my learning that's one kind of philosophy. Yeah. >> Even Buddhism have that kind just say you need all the time always clean. Yes. You know just like a big tree. >> You have too much uh >> to trim the branches. >> You need to always you know every season you need to change >> fix it keep them healthy and good. That's one way. >> Yeah. >> Also have the other way. say to figure out color tree. >> Sure. >> Even no tree. >> Yeah. >> Why you care about [laughter] season lips? >> Sure. >> So there's a two different way. This is slightly slightly slightly to understand relative truth >> and what universal something more >> when is direct go to the and cut that. >> Yeah. that there's like say they have a special words in say they they have a mirror you need a clean mirror every day if you're dirty you cannot see your face then the other master saying if there who where is the mirror if no mirror yeah why you care about the clean one you know there's a two kind of way to learn really depends the person want to slightly step by step what quickly wins different teach. But >> where where do you come down? >> I learn both. I learn both. This is safe. >> I made it clean is safe. >> Yeah. >> But that way I also learn. >> But >> that means on the other maybe talk about the reincarnation. >> Yeah. >> You never know how many times you already learned. >> Sure. >> Maybe this is the last time. >> Yeah. That's why you quick use the no mirror no tree >> because you if if we put a 100 times is really >> how do you know you're 100 or your 50s? >> Yeah. >> So if 50 is better use this way. If you already likening on that way this work >> also if the tree is ego and you think you've cut it down and you have no ego that's kind of egotistical. >> Yeah. But no another tra is explain ego where is the ego? Yeah. >> In in our body where is the ego we need to >> we not meditate you know just put your hands here that's jetty no that's hand put it all the pieces >> where is J who who suffering which part you change change until you cannot find the really really have jelly you need to put everything together they're have jelly >> yes >> now use the same philosophy you we talk about a car there a car really car. We put all the pieces saying there's a wheel there, this this there this there this there this there this there this there this there this there this there this there this this we cannot find the car. >> Yeah. If you slow down, slow down, you're kind of smaller, smaller, smaller. You even >> the atoms >> the islands then smaller thems >> become the same, >> right? >> Then where is you? Where is me? You know that that level. So >> it's quite my English is not good enough to explain that. Yeah. Chinese Chinese I can explain. If that's way you cannot find you then I'll say no trade. I'll say nothing. >> Yeah. So uh I think what I learned is very good and from my all the masters they teach me compassion. >> Yeah. >> And also they teach me wisdom. >> Yes. >> They say if you do only compassion you help other people that's why you're suffering >> because you need a wisdom because no one can help the world. Everybody every corner. >> Yeah. You need the perspective. >> Yeah. in this respect a lot of things there that use reason try your best to help whatever you can >> one of the things you're talking about in the book is is anger you have a great line you said it's a honey tip but a poison root [laughter] >> you know my daughter did help me write a English book because yeah 30 years ago I learning sports by words English to make a Hollywood movie [laughter] but even now I didn't pay a lot of attention on the language more more like a meditation study you know training the mind so when they ask me writing the English book I say I don't know I only can talk a little bit story but how to put on words on water so I need my daughter help me >> well my my books are translated in a bunch of languages that I don't speak so [laughter] I totally >> people say that's what do you like it what do you want they say it's good similar okay They mail you a copy, you're like, I guess it's good. >> Yeah. Yeah. Sometime you want to put more but my daughter both I have they teach me they say you cannot put too much what do you want to say because they cannot digest. >> Sure. >> You need a little bit a little bit little bit this. >> But talk to me about anger. I think sometimes people think anger is like a good fuel especially in in combat sports or in fighting like anger is >> tough but you sort of make the opposite argument in the book that it's dangerous. >> Yes. angry, you want to do something and the result maybe make you more angry, [laughter] right? Yeah. Then you cannot solve outside problem, you hurt your inside. So you changed. If you're less angry, if angry can solve all the problem then I say everybody angry. >> Yes. >> But angry cannot solve all the problems. Then you angry that the other people also angry. So both angry and more more more convinced maybe thousand years still they hate each other. >> Also it's like you see in sports what why do people talk trash in sports? Like why do people try to get inside the other person's head? Because they know if they insult you or hurt your feelings and you get angry, you'll make mistakes. >> You'll hurt yourself. >> Yes. And then and then then we like no but my anger is good. It's like [laughter] no you see it in someone else. You see the damage it causes. You should be very nervous about it in your own self. >> Yeah. So if you do angry you you understand where the angry come from you you solve the angry then you become stronger. >> Yes. >> If I'm standing there and you say hey J your book is suck you're you're something you're stupid you're just yelling I'm so okay because I train you it's okay respect. Thank you your opinion. Thank you. Thank you. That make you angry. So make you try to find other words to make me frustrated. But if I'm okay, everything okay, >> then you don't need a revenge. >> It's a form of strength to not be triggered. Yeah. >> Or if people can't upset you, then you have strength. >> Yeah. >> Then you understand everything because they want something. >> Yes. >> They use that words want to get some respect. >> Yeah. [laughter] people like you they want to respect something so it's open so angry hurt yourself that's why I say don't angry you know >> uh if angry can help then make angry don't help then just keep >> yes >> you can change you yourself then you see the world totally different >> that's what I learned >> yeah and it's almost like the more stressful or frustrating or difficult the experience the more you need to bring calm to it. >> Yeah. >> Because it's complicated. >> Yes. And a lot of people I heard you know people say wow I was so tired recently the work you know work 20 24 hours or 18 hours a lot of work complain [clears throat] complain say uh listen why we need to work work just solve problem. If no problem we don't need to work right everybody working just solve problem. People say the comedy perfect comedy no problem. Why they need you? They need a lot of machine is good enough. >> Uh so work when you appreciate. So wow. >> Yes. >> A lot of things I need to do today because a lot of problem machine cannot solve I need to solve. So in >> still work. Yeah. >> Still a hour really depends how do you thinking. >> Mhm. >> You can enjoying this whole day eight hour. Well, you can angry eight hours. So, what way better for you? >> Yeah. >> That's I thinking. >> Yeah. You can laugh or you can cry about it. >> Yes. [laughter] And also forgive yourself. >> Yes. >> In the past, I tried so hard. I never give myself >> made a mistake. Yeah. >> I cannot I'm angry myself. You know something. Then you look back just say, "Hey, 5,000 years a lot of people made the mistake. Everybody make a mistake. >> Forgive them. You are not a perfect guy. >> Sure. >> You need to say good and bad mistake also your life experiences. >> Yeah. >> All the experiences make your life. >> Yeah. >> That's why you need to appreciate. >> Yes. >> Appreciate the mistake. If you don't have mistake, you do know success because you success every day the whole life you thought is boring. >> Well, one of the some of the mistakes you talk about in the book, you talk about growing as a parent. some of the mistakes you made as a parent. That must have been fun to write about. >> Yes, because you know I'm traditional Chinese people. I >> I don't have experience how to be father because I don't have father have idol to see that you should do that. Also traditional Chinese people just think you know you work hard make a lot of money then give them good education and teacher helping good money go to the hospital you know take care healthy take care student that's good enough >> then go you know I just through that journey until one day I realize I have a lot of problem the money cannot solve all yes >> and they can solve some problem but not all problem. That's why maybe my daughter they need something I forgot. So the first trick is my daughter she got some mental problem. Then >> I just do nothing. >> Yeah. >> I don't understand that kind what caused that. >> I don't know how to help. Then I saw oh you're ji you're learning Buddhism. You know a lot of mental training. >> But now they close the door. they don't want to talk to me. It's how I doing it. I suddenly think I need to learn. I need to recover everything. So I turned on a lot of work and then through this journey try to everything I can with my daughter become listener become their friend. Yeah. >> Roommate because usually I don't know American culture the parents always still say oh you should do this you should do this. Yeah, you're the [laughter] general. They're the soldier like that way. But I >> I thought doesn't work. So I slightly slightly >> need to change change. Become their buddy. >> Yeah. >> Become their roommate, become their friend. Then talk to them. They teach me a lot. You know how to be parents, how to be shar sometime I need to learn. Yeah. >> Don't give opinion. Just hear. So I learned a lot journey and of course learning this can help me ego less and less self self-center and less less >> then they they become my teacher also. So >> it's like it's like wherever you need to be challenged the most that's where your kids >> end up needing like do you know what I mean? Like I feel like with my kids like it's it's all the things that I struggle with the most >> that they are perfectly lined up to like put the most pressure on you know [laughter] yeah I still remember one day yeah four years ago maybe one day my two daughter come you know where I met in Los Angeles I thought I'm a goodest training my mind very calm very good so you have something you know you don't like me some hard talk about it then they say wow your self center your ego had [laughter] >> I heard the ego is become evil >> in my I say I'm not evil I try work so hard in my life to protect you girls I can bring my heart give to you everything why I'm eagle how I'm so angry so there we're struggling now they say see you learn no self this big ego >> I really think Wow, it's I'm not good enough. So I learn I learn next day, next day, two days maybe take me two days and say sorry I'm not good enough. I need to learn. So two years later they say the same thing. I just smile. I say okay. Even I'm I'm happy. I'm smile. But four years later they say something. I say wow good. What are you talking? Yeah that guy J is selfish. J is self-center. It's good. You can see your also grow up. Yeah. Also grow. >> Yeah. >> Because they become my teacher, my >> buddy, my roommate. I'm so happy I have a two daughter. Uh four daughter. Yeah. But this two they have a little bit especially Jeda study Buddhist also. We have the same conversation or >> Well, each one of your kids has a different parent, right? Because you're growing like they like especially the older one. You're the least experienced with the oldest and then you're a little more experienced with the next one and a little more. So, like just as we're growing and changing, our kids are getting different versions of us because we're in different places on our journey. >> Yes. I'm a normal guy. Normal person. >> Yes. With the same Yes. Well, yeah. You talked about in the book that like you thought it was like, "Hey, I'll check in when you're 18." >> Yeah. >> But a lot was missed. >> Yes. Because um [clears throat] I'm working you know during the 30 years 40 years I'm working a lot and my uh my wife take care of them say I work for them you know you go to work >> after 18 you take care yeah >> before 18 I already have a big problem [laughter] I try to work together then later on later on now it's >> And is that kind of how it was when you were growing up is I mean obviously I know you lost your father early but it can be hard when you're like well this is how it was when I was a kid. Yeah, I was kids. I don't have father pass away. You know, mother didn't take care because I'm living in the school. >> Yes. So, you didn't really have any either parents. No, you were you were in school system. >> Yeah. The school only have >> the coach the coach like how to use the bad words, you know, just punish punish doing it. Doing it harder harder doing it. Right. >> So then you think your life is just doing it doing it. Then before you know they're later on we become friend they talk about so dad you know when I was 11 I get my injured and the sports class I go back I'm so hurt you tell me say say no problem I hurt a lot more than you do it stronger >> next day you know months later you'll become strong again he say I just say father company finally come back finally come back you need to say say oh sorry daughter you value you tell me like tough tough your training I said wow that's I what I learned from my master >> it's hard to give what you didn't get >> yeah yeah >> I didn't have experiences so that's why I'm not a good enough I learn I still learn >> right now right now I'm learning every day yeah you see you see now it's better >> I have a book in there I want to give you I think that's the interesting like like there's something even about Buddha like Buddha has a kid >> and he leaves to go get enlightenment. >> Yes. >> I mean, maybe that was okay 5,000 years ago or whatever, but but I think if that's what enlightenment takes, I don't like it. >> That is not the only way. >> Yeah. >> For sure. It's one way. >> Yeah. >> Make me make everybody. >> Wow. That's a princess. The whole country is his, you know, everything you got. All the human want get everything you you say that cannot help. >> Yeah. >> Even you have power, money cannot have that. So he tried to find another solution. Finally he likening helping a lot of people. But today you know Yeah. Well I was 35 30 40 around there I want to study become really really life like. >> Yeah. And when I tell my master I want to go to the mountain retreat and you know something fail master say get out of here go back. you doing this way, you will destroy Buddhism. I so how can you need a good students? I'm so good. I can training three years, you know, five years until I'm lightning. Good guy, good go good go get out. I said why? You see, look at the modern days. People look at you like a idol, good guy. Yeah. >> And you have wonderful wife, daughter, you know, pretty good life, you help the society. Suddenly you're through. You don't care about your daughter, wife. You go to the mountain to study. A lot of parents will say that guy mental problem mental problem. You know he don't care take care of wife of children. He go there learning s strange stuff. Don't learn in that whatever he learned. >> If it involves forsaking your obligations and your loved ones, >> what kind of enlightenment is that? >> Yeah. Doesn't mean anything. So then they say you go back you need to continue even master say go back continue make a hero I say I don't want to hurt people even I'm working on the side I'm struggling why I beat him >> you know why I beat him say don't put your likening Buddha you are just a human beat up become hero in a normal day you show your compassion you show your stuff to people there have meaning you're a real person have meaning if you're too far away this people say get out of here. You thought you needed to go to a temple and learn from a teacher but actually she was your teacher and you're like yes yes that's that's >> if I'm in the mountain never learning that right never learning you every day you go out even I say even yeah recently I read a Chinese book then still there have some people like like the book a lot of people say help some people say his mental problem why just make continue make a movie make a movie make money make something why he learning Yes. Yeah. You need to understand it's respect their thinking. >> Can I show you the bookstore? You want to go to the store? Let's do it.