“The First Hour Of The Morning Is CRUCIAL” - Millionaire Habits For SUCCESS! | Bedros Keuilian

Majors Cooley and welcome back to the show Tom thank you for having me again I'm stoked man so why is it that people that are hyper successful are so obsessed with getting their morning routine right and what should everybody watching this right now do to make theirs crispy because that's a really good question I think the morning routine is something that will set anybody up for Success right because when you wake up and I wake up and the next guy wakes up we all have about the same number of time actually exactly the same number of time and so since we know that that means what you do versus what I do matters and so if I'm screen sucking the moment I get up I'm looking at social media what's going on Facebook who's talking about what on Instagram and you're like hey I've got this GSD list I call it the get [ __ ] done list and the GSD list is you're just going to wake up and dominate your day like my morning routine is wake up never hit the snooze button we've talked about this on your show previously drink my 30 ounces of water because Sean Stevenson said so and then take a shower and then end up downstairs with my protein shake and my coffee and more water and work off my GSD list like that sets me up to win checking in on social media is not part of my morning routine because all of a sudden something on social media might trigger me to feel like I'm missing out might trigger me to feel like I should have been at an event might trigger me to feel like sense of guilt a sense of Shame a sense of whatever and any of those things any of those feelings and emotions are not things that I would take into the Battle of business and I'm in the Battle of business because of when I make money I can have a greater sense of meaning with it and and so I cannot take emotions and feelings and thoughts that I got from social media especially in the morning to the battlefield of business where I do most of my heavy work in the morning so that morning routine sets me up to win and soon as I'm done with my GSD list by about 9 A.M like you can set your clock to me I go right to the gym work out intentionally put my phone in my cubby at the gym and because again I'm susceptible to looking at the screen and if I'm doing that all of a sudden my workout is less than Stellar yeah which means I feel like a failure and now I'm more likely to compound failure throughout the day so that's how I look at it so conversely if I slept in hit the snooze button didn't drink 30 ounces of water just took a sip of water now I'm going to be late to work I feel rushed the subconscious mind is telling me that I'm a loser I'm a failure I'm an imposter how you can go lead a international franchise or a supplement company or a or write another book when you're a loser dude right the subconscious mind speaks to us that's the inner critic and so to shut down the inner critic and give voice to the inner advocate a strong morning routine sets you up to win the day you win the day you win the week and then off you go you've won a year and then a decade it's so crazy to me how much that matters like you can get off by just a little and your efficiency starts to be off and then the day just isn't as um useful as it could have been and it really it really does start with the morning like getting people to understand if you get the morning right then the rest of your day you're going to be able to be far more productive and when you start stacking those things that really is the difference between somebody that accomplishes a lot and somebody that doesn't look I don't want to deny the intellect plays a big role education plays a big role but if you are inefficient to your point about okay we all have the same number of hours so it comes down to how are you spending your time but there's something like I find myself wanting to say more words because there's something ineffable that I'm not capturing yet which is there is a really subtle difference between a high performance day and a mediocre day and when I think about certainly the thing that has been my superpower is I'm able to generate momentum so I can go from standing still nobody knows who I am nobody believes in what I'm trying to do uh we don't have a company incorporated like all of that and then ah you know those Furs like getting the machine moving is so hard that's what I can do and whether that's a new project whether that's a whole company whatever I can get those early things going every day feels like that and on the days where I am battered and beaten psychologically and I what I I call hiding in bed and I'm hiding in bed and you just even if I just miss getting out of bed because I give myself 10 minutes if I get out of bed in 11 minutes I'm like uh I know where this goes there's something I'm pushing against that is stop either I didn't go to bed on time I didn't sleep well I'm stressed whatever but there's something going on that made getting up unusually hard that day and then it just Spirals and so getting people to understand how important it is to do the most important things first do them efficiently get the psychological momentum going so that you can believe in yourself you have that credibility you get going it really makes a big difference but it's hard to explain it is hard to explain but sometimes you don't need an explanation for example if you just watch What winners do and do what they do odds are you will eventually have a similar outcome great example is I believed I believe you may have shared this at either fleischman's elevator nights when we all spoke there or it might have been on when uh you were kind enough to come and do my podcast but you said if I wake up within correct me if I'm wrong if I wake up within 20 minutes of my alarm going off I don't go back to sleep I just get up I'm like I'm adopting that I'm adopting that now if it was some crackhead who robs Banks says that I may not adopt that but you're someone I respect that I want to be like and emulate you know what I'm going to add that to my repertoire like I don't know why Sean wrote in his book that you need to drink third ounce of water in the morning I don't care why I trust him and I trust that he's a great scientist and he's all about human optimization I'm going to do that I trust you as an entrepreneur and so when I look up to in this category of life I'm going to do that and so I just start adopting things and I think there's a gift to just being for lack of a better term ignorant like you know ignorance is bliss yeah so much of My Success has just been because no one told me that I couldn't fly no one said those you don't have wings and so I was like watch this and I flew yeah I mean I created a software company with no software background or franchise without any without a dropped out of college in 32 days bro out of junior college right they're like well you don't have a lot of green you don't pause on that why did you drop out I I just felt like I didn't belong I I was constantly just like high school I felt constantly behind and I figured all right I'm gonna go to Junior College and see if I can get on track because you know they say go to college where you're new to like I would be the first family member to graduate college because remember we escaped Soviet Union came here when I was six and so it was a big deal I felt that pressure on me and I truly wanted to have a college degree just to say I've done this right but just like high school it felt like I didn't belong it felt like I would have to study three or four or five times harder than everyone else and I remember in call in high school the the foil method remember foil first inner outer last nope see that no one does never heard that but it was part of algebra or something oh God I cheated my way through all the mathematics I have no idea God bless you I was so bad at it that I remember showing my answer and the teacher going but that's you're not going to get credit because you didn't do foil and this is the only thing I remember about high school because she like chastised me so much she says you didn't do the first inner out or last you didn't show your work you got the answer I remember thinking I'm gonna be an entrepreneur man I'm going to produce the results I I knew that I was going to be my own boss wow I'm Gonna Be My Own Boss I need to produce an outcome and people are going to prove some outcomes for me I don't care how they produce it don't produce it unethically don't produce it by cheating someone killing someone but produced outcome I want and I will actually reward you for producing it faster instead of doing this amount of work if you can do this amount of work and produce the outcome our industry rewards that the education system doesn't and so the same thing happened in college so like 31 32 days in I'm like all right I'm out I'm falling behind I feel like a dumb ass I'm having to study three four times as much to remember things that I feel are irrelevant to where my path in life and so I moved on was like all right full-lane entrepreneurship any of that chip away at your belief that you could do the entrepreneurship thing or you just knew uh this isn't going to matter I felt that I was so unemployable in terms of like every job I had gotten fired from also right except for Disneyland I worked at Disneyland for six and a half years I didn't get fired I quit every other job I got fired from the bagel store on by Balboa Island Adventure City um you name it every place and so I was like I'm unemployable no one wants to employ me I know I can be a better boss like and and have people like me who are I don't know maybe a bit of Misfits uh free thinkers outcome producers without showing the work work for me and I'll create my own little tribe I've always known I was a black sheep and so school and not doing well in school did not deter me from being an entrepreneur in fact all it did was say this is your only path dude no one's going to employ you you're unemployable you're going to lose every job you have um and it was because of the conflict that I have I always questioned Authority and I think that's a great Behavior to have but know that if you constantly question authority you're probably not employable right the whole idea of having a boss is there your source of authority and so I always questioned Authority I questioned education system and so I knew that I had to beat my own path so all it did is solidify my resolve yeah it's interesting the idea of questioning authorities so that's always been my problem I've always had a problem with authority I'm not even sure so I mean look 50 of us is hardwired so I'll say that for whatever reason I've just always had an issue with that uh so yeah that's definitely but I'm very employable I was an amazing employee so it's weird it's like this bizarre conflict of I hate it I hate people being able to tell me what to do which is why I was so hell-bent to become My Own Boss um but I would silently conform so it's really interesting and bucking out of that is difficult I actually want to talk about that there's going to I think a huge part of this conversation will end up being about that but first I want to talk about imperfect action yes so we've got our moaning routine we know we need to be hyper efficient I still think I failed to convey like that that real subtle Nuance of what a big difference but if people can just like you said model the behavior great so people have that on lock but they're going to most people are diminished by the failures by not being good at school by whatever they've been kicked in the teeth enough in life so they convince themselves they're not going to be able to do it and the number of people no matter how many times I say because I talk a lot about you need to learn right so whatever you're going to do you're going to learn about it but then people end up in the death Loop of like I'm going to learn from nine years because I don't think I understand and I'm like no no if you learn something in the morning you start using it in the afternoon so like you have to go right away otherwise it's it's all going to be um book knowledge is not going to be practical right it's going to be theoretical it's not going to be applied so what is imperfect action and how have you mustered the courage to actually do it when you know that failure is so possible so I'll start with the idea of failure first and I learned from Napoleon Hills book outwitting The Devil that there is no such thing as failure I have reframed it in my head as I will experience temporary defeat many times in my life but I will never experience failure and once you accept that why what's failure and why won't you expect failure is a choice and so if you choose not to like if you choose not to drink any more water from that cup no matter how much I make you you choose not to drink it it's not going to happen so it's failure when you actually stop trying it's when you stop trying it's a choice to stay down right and it's okay to stay down and gather your wits and then get back up hence making it temporary defeat the moment you choose to stay down by because of not trying you have given up so let's just say giving up instead of failure failure shouldn't even exist it's temporary defeat so once I know that then I'm like well there's no such thing as failure because I choose not to accept it or acknowledge it therefore I will only see temporary defeats in life and the more things that I attempt to do that are new the higher the probability of having temporary defeats however each one of those defeats are a lesson that I could learn from and improve because the human mind the psyche and body are very adaptable playing ping pong against one of your guys here was different than playing against Lisa your wife who's a beast at it and so I had to adopt the body is so adaptable so knowing that if I learn something first thing in the morning I want to be able to use it as soon as possible I don't want to wait till it's perfect I don't want to wait till we have a trademark or the copyright like I was the one out the gate launching Fit Body Boot Camp before was trademarking my attorney was like stop I will always lean into imperfect action because I do know that the universe will collude with me will conspire with me when I am leaning into imperfect action I can always course correct as I go see people always we're so black and white bro we are so black and white and I was the king of black and white like if I do this and if it doesn't work out then I will fail oh [ __ ] oh [ __ ] with that mindset and if that's the only outcome you choose to accept that's scary that it's it's either going to be a win or a fail what if it's somewhere in the middle that there's a temporary defeat and therefore you can back up the car and go down the next Road and then temporary defeat back up the car again go down the next road so imperfect action tells me that the person the universe the universe will reward the person who acts the quickest that's just how the universal Collective Consciousness works if we know that to be true then I will take an idea that I learned I will launch it immediately and I will course correct as I go and the universe will reward me because of that and again these people who say the universe a you're a man of Faith right I am a man of faith that there's a God a higher power the book that you gave me my friend um the power of myth Joseph Campbell really talks about Consciousness and our human animal we are Consciousness writing in this meat sack that's a human animal that has impulsively wants to eat and lean into comfort and convenience and greed and you know if this was the only cup of water left and the few hours went by one of us are going to want to attack it that's what the human animal wants to do Consciousness goes I'm just going to look through these windows call the eyes I'm going to control my human animal most people are they're light their inner Radiance are so stifled the way I show it at the project and we'll probably get into the project later but imagine this light bulb and it glows bright within that's our Radiance we are connected to the source to God and all of our Consciousness together is the universe and so if I take that bulb and I put a black blanket over it and another layer of black blanket and another black blanket soon you barely see the glow most people their Radiance has been stifled because they put food drugs alcohol infidelity pornography laziness binge watching television all these layers of distraction over their Radiance they're supposed to go so bright that if you were able to remove all that everyone's got that great Consciousness but all those blankets on top of your light stifles it and therefore you become more of a human animal because you've stifled Consciousness and so the word greatest work we can ever do in our life is the work we do on ourselves which is really removing all of those layers of blankets so that the light can shine bright and then you know this you walk into somewhere and people are magnetically attracted to you it's not for any other reason other than you've done the self work your Tom 2.0 3.0 4.0 just like on Pedro's 2.0 3.0 4.0 and therefore people are like man there's something about this person that's the universal connection we all have Consciousness their human animal can see that this person is glowing brighter and they're attracted to that and it's our job then to go let me help you expose your Radiance as well so how do you how do you start pulling those napkins the black cloth how do you peel those off self-awareness right self-awareness first um Until you realize that you are a human animal I realized that I was a human animal meaning you have impulses impulsive that you're emotional that you react on emotion and not logic that you make decisions on feelings and sometimes those are somewhat permanent decisions based on temporary feelings and we've all made those I'm not pointing fingers I was the king of making bad decisions on temporary feelings that later led to regret but 11 years ago I had this massive panic attack and I talked about that in my book and thank God man for that panic attack because I was 37 years old I thought I was having a heart attack I'm like I'm at the peak of my Prime Fit Body Boot Camp starting to thrive like just blowing up it's becoming this International brand we got recognition from Ink magazine an entrepreneur magazine um yet my marriage was starting to fall apart my babies at the time they're 14 and or 15 and 17 now they wouldn't come running to me when I come into the house because I gave off this tense energy right and I would impulsively just emotionally eat when I get home bagels and cream cheese because I needed the dopamine hits yet I was running a Fitness franchise so I was incongruent with the fitness industry that I'm supposed to be in I'm making videos at the time on YouTube from the chin up because I didn't really want to show the pouring out of shape that I was in and so I share all this with you because that panic attack led me to realize uh okay one it wasn't a heart attack thankfully the doctor did the EKG test and was like hey you're good but how's your life I'm like well I'm stressed I'm like drinking NyQuil to fall asleep every night and taking Vicodin to fall asleep and um I would wake up and take adderall and drink a whole bunch of coffee to then you know kick that foggy headedness from the drugs the night before and so I was always behind on schedule felt like an imposter because I would expect something from my employees that I wouldn't even do myself I share all this with you because that panic attack which felt like a heart attack led me to start doing some self work the self work started with a therapist because I read I didn't want to take um they gave me Xanax dude I was on Xanax for four days and I don't know if you've ever taken Xanax but for me it felt like someone turned off my creativity switch like if we have all these different switches someone just like a dimmer switch brought it down to like one and so all right I don't feel anxious but I also don't feel like trying anything stuff just chill out at home like four days in I'm like this is how I lose it all so I went back to the doctor I'm like dude I can't take this stuff he goes well to manage your your Stress and Anxiety have you thought about talking to a therapist like oh that's for crazy people right but um reluctantly I found a good therapist Dr Kevin Downing in Brea California and um and we spent the next like 15 months every Monday after work I'd drive to Brea and I'd sit on his couch and some Mondays I was like Kevin could I just can I just curl up on the couch pay you to just let me sleep here just take a nap I'm just drained and he would just have lighter conversations with me those days still charge me for a lighter conversation and then there was days where we did the heavy work where I just felt like I was just walking to my car in this parking lot like I was just walking through molasses like we peeled away a lot of scars from childhood trauma like being molested as a kid in Armenia by two older boys to just being bullied when we came here but all this to say Kevin brought to surface self-awareness for me and I realized that dude I shield and I soothe the ego is a real thing and it is there to protect us but the ego will help us shield and soothe so if I make a lot of money I can surround myself with yes people then yes people are going to be good to me they're gonna they're gonna do it so of course I wanted to make a lot of money all this to say self-awareness comes from self-work once you do the self-work you become self-aware you're like oh my God I am flawed Tom I'm a horrible friend when you're like hey how's it going and I'm like what do you mean by that that's because I'm reacting to some weird feelings that I haven't processed through that may have happened as a kid man just because the way you said something I gets triggered it triggers me right and so I started to do the self-work it was ugly it was not fun um I had weeks at a time where he had to process about what happened to me as a kid man do I tell my parents who are in their 80s no there's no point in telling them they're just gonna feel this guilt and why don't you tell us sooner and they're going to die with that memory like so like keep it to yourself you know so those are real things that the process do I share this publicly well I feel like I'm supposed to serve humanity and the selfish most selfish thing I do is each time I serve Humanity I serve myself so all right I'm going to try and talk about this on stage one time and one day it came out on stage I could see the whole audience squirming in their seats because who the hell wants to hear that hey look if you've been molested or sexually or physically emotionally abused you probably have trauma and you carry this Shield and you're either shielding or soothing soothing with drugs alcohol infidelity whatever or shielding as in not letting people win and so how is that showing up with your kids with your friendships business Partnerships your wife yours your husband um and so the more I talk about it and so I very quickly realized that oh my God talking about this allows me to have more aha moments more aha moments lead me to taking off yet another layer of that blanket and the blight gets brighter and brighter and the brighter the lights light gets the more people want to hear from me and talk to me and do business with me and stay around me and and I realized this is how we make impact we all want to serve Humanity we all know that we're on this planet for a reason we have a higher level of purpose and so we feel the gnawing in our gut like I want to impact legs I want to change lives I want to inspire people cool start with fixing victim number one before you go fix everybody else you know talk to me about the light so there's two ideas in here there's uh the universe is conspiring with you I'd definitely love to know more about that and then there's the idea of the light is sort of already on but you've covered it up and you just have to peel it away yeah how much of it is the light itself even if you didn't have it covered up do you is there a way to make that brighter like whatever that thing is or do you feel like no we're born perfect and the life diminishes us I do believe and again I've got no signs to back this up you've probably had far smarter people sitting here at this table who could back this up with some kind of science but I again I'm so convicted of my beliefs and how about this maybe I'm absolutely all wrong but just because I believe in this so much that I make it so if that alone makes me successful and happy in life and feeling like I've had some sense of meaning and significance I'm good to go man it's interesting you actually said something earlier and I wanted to say you know how crazy you sound right now right but it's so effective that um I so here's another idea I don't know how to get people to embody this but so what you said that made you sound crazy but to me I'm totally with you is uh you were talking about the failure and you're like I refuse to acknowledge it yeah foreign you both and you talked about this but you both have to look at it assess what went wrong look at the data learn from it so that you can do something more effective next time and at the same time you have to completely ignore whatever Temptation you have to believe that that means that you're not going to succeed in the future and that this is somehow a commentary on your capabilities it's this really weird Schism of you have to look at both things so yeah you're right and and I think that it's true what you're saying so I'm not a believer in the universe is conspiring I think the universe could give a [ __ ] like it just it it is there's obviously something that we don't understand so whatever there is some sort of god-ish thing there's something I don't understand right why is there something instead of nothing it's arguably the most profound question that you can ever ask I won't derail us on that but so there's obviously something yeah there's obviously something that I don't understand but I don't think it's working for me I think that there are a set of rules the world Works a certain way what is up my friend Tom bilyu here and I have a big question to ask you how would you rate your level of personal discipline on a scale of one to ten if your answer is anything less than a 10 I've got something cool for you and let me tell you right now discipline by its very nature means compelling yourself to do difficult things that are stressful boring which is what kills most people or possibly scary or even painful now here is the thing achieving huge goals and stretching to reach your potential requires you to do those challenging stressful things and to stick with them even when it gets boring and it will get boring building your levels of personal discipline is not easy but let me tell you it pays off in fact I will tell you you're never going to achieve anything meaningful unless you develop discipline right I've just released a class from Impact Theory university called how to build iron discipline that teaches you the process of building yourself up in this area so that you can push yourself to do the hard things that greatness is going to require of you right click the link on the screen register for this class right now and let's get to work I will see you inside this Workshop from Impact Theory University until then my friends be legendary peace out and so when you were talking about human as animal that resonates with me we I'm I have told uh my the people in Impact Theory University like a dozen times if there's going to be an Epitaph on my Tombstone I would like it to read you're having a biological experience meaning even if there is a God that God has given you a set of physics chemistry biology and they work a certain way and if you try to fight them your life will be miserable because you will be unable to predict the outcome of your behaviors if you can't predict the outcome of your behaviors you won't be able to take right action meaning the action that moves you most efficiently towards your goals so I don't think it's working with me but I still think everything you said is true in that if I align myself with the way things actually work I'll make rapid progress so why does the world I think the exact word you said where the universe will conspire with the person who acts fastest I think that's true I just don't think the universe is it's not the language I would use sure so but it is so in alignment with the first person to act will learn faster than the next person they're obviously not afraid to fail if they can lower their ego enough to take in the lesson of whatever failure they get by moving first then they can improve and keep going it's the action Improvement and continuing to move that's the conspiring but whether you believe that it's God that's going to work with you the universe is going to work with you because you do it or you just [ __ ] do it whatever as long as you're on that path you're going to win so I think we might be saying the same thing bro 100 yeah there's no doubt because you just said that on your Tombstone if there's going to be anything it's going to say that you're having a biological experience and this biological experience set by God or whoever else whatever else right um there's rules to the game this is kind of what you're implied and that if you play by the rules that you're gonna win if you don't play by the rules if you don't understand the game you're it's going to be a painful life a painful Human Experience right we can agree to that and so the way I look at it is is just that the Source Universe all of our Collective Consciousness together is like we've all agreed subconsciously these are the rules every person knows that they got to lean into imperfect action do they I doubt that they do if you take out the layers bro take out the players it is a lot of work this is why we all start off as some level of Radiance like you look at a child so pure going back to the question you asked like is that light just on I believe we all have I don't know anything about electricity so I'm going to say whatever let's say this is a 20 watt light light bulb right we're all born with a 20 watt light bulb and it's nothing's covering it ah this is beautiful baby and we hold it and ah there it is and then mom and dad are like oh you're chunky oh you're clumsy now that you're starting to walk around these are layers being put on now they plant you in front of the TV a lot and now because Mom and Dad want to go on date nights and they don't they can't afford a nanny they're going to slap the iPad in front of you on date night so now your screen's sucking and now you're just seeing all this more blankets are being put on this light the light the source your Radiance is being stifled soon you become addicted to watching television it becomes your thing and you don't connect and you don't know how to build rapport now you're a teenager and you're awkward and you're strange and you don't know and you're not playing video games instead of socializing and I share all this with you because that Radiance layer by layer from food to names like oh you're clumsy you're chunky uh we're all our family everyone in our family's fat you know how many times I heard that in my life so I was like okay I'm gonna be fat strong and so when I made this like big proclamation in 2010 like [ __ ] it I'm gonna train for six weeks and run a marathon like my inner voice was like bro you're a fat dude that just lifts weights you power lift like but now I'm gonna run a marathon you just watch so literally the inner critic and the inner Advocate are fighting Within Me and that was the first time I allowed the inner Advocate to win and I hired a running coach and I and I said make me a running program I'm gonna run the San Diego Rock and Roll Marathon my wife at the time ran marathons like three a year and look what a freaking hypocrite I was here Tom jokingly I told my wife many years before we got married we're still dating I was like hey you know if you marry me I'll run a marathon right just jokingly but again subconsciously deep down inside there's some truth to this that was me testing whether she's going to say yes or no right we're still dating we're new with this whole relationship so she's like fine I will right so then let's say three years later or four years later we got married bro was nine years in and she ran three marathons a year so almost 30 marathons later I had yet whoa what a liar I was what a hypocrite I was now one could say well I just jokingly said that I didn't really mean it at the time I'm like lifting all these weights I'm dead lifting I'm squatting I'm benching I'm a big boy lifting big weights God's made me to lift weights you can justify it any way you want then you can always find evidence to back it up right look at my traps look at my shoulders at the time right so I share this with you because one day she's like hey I'm gonna run the Rock and Roll Marathon and I was like cool awesome have a great time I then left on a trip that day to uh to run one of my masterminds the time I surrounded my masterminds in uh Miami San Diego Las Vegas we're in Las Vegas and there's like 40 50 of my coaching clients and Craig Valentine is there as well I invited Craig to help coach this group with me he was the guest speaker and Craig's telling one of the people who was complaining about procrastinating yeah I just keep procrastinating and I just keep doing all these things because I don't want to launch my products I don't want to face the rejection of it potentially whatever right new entrepreneur and so Craig very curmudgeon he goes uh you know what you need to do you know cut that deadline you need to cut your deadline in half again and then he just starts lacing into this person and I'm sitting here I'm like oh my God he's speaking to me right now here I am nine years later almost 30 marathons I've yet to make good on my promise so I text my wife under the table I'm like what did you say that Marathon was she goes in like eight weeks I'm like great sign me up for it right so she goes I'll sign you up for the half every Marathon has a half marathon I'm like that's [ __ ] sign me up for the full Marathon because I'm also all in on everything I do which is great thing unless you're like going to do cocaine or heroin but always make sure my addictions are good these days these days these days full disclosure these days I am pretty obsessive and I think that is a gift but it could also be very damaging like under the right circumstances you would find me dead in a gutter um and so I have to be vigilant and militant in my schedule and the people that I surround myself with my thought patterns all of it um going back to Diana and the marathon so she books me for the Rock and Roll Marathon I find a running coach in How the Universe colludes with us my friend you ready for this in that group in that coaching group was a woman named Joe Brewer her website I [ __ ] you not run with jill.com she's a running coach so at lunch I'm telling her about it not even connecting the dots like hey I just signed up for a marathon I'm a bit nervous because I could deadlift I could squat I could bench but Ron I've never had to run right she goes do you need a running program I'm like well yeah yeah I'm gonna find me a running coach she goes that's what I do run with jill.com like oh my God she makes me a running program lo and behold I trained for six weeks run the marathon everything's fine I broke through some glass ceiling some limiting belief that I was only made to do this and so when we were born we had this Radiance this light and families Meanwhile your aunts your uncles your moms your dads but soon they call you chunky and fat and clumsy and all this and you begin to buy all those things and your Radiance goes away your light dims and you're just like this robot living other people's stories or narrative that they put on you until one day you decide to do the self-work and peel back painfully the layers to expose your Radiance of your whopping 20 watts then you could do even deeper work and raise the wattage like a dimmer switch to whatever I don't know what the level is because I'm still a work in progress if you ever have me back 10 years from now there might be a higher version of myself um but that's where I am today is Raising that wattage yeah it's really it's a very interesting metaphor and I think that as people learn about the way the mind works and they realize that you have to be really thoughtful about what you allow yourself to think um I'm a big believer that you you are what you repeat and so whatever you allow yourself to repeat you're going to become and even so the negative stuff no matter how absurd if you repeated enough you'll actually start to believe it and the positive stuff no matter how absurd at first it seems you'll start to believe it if you allow yourself to repeat it there's a really great book called feeling great by David D Burns and entity talks about pattern interrupting like you have to pattern interrupt your negative thoughts and that was something that really served me in the beginning I was so prone to believe negative things about myself that I just had to learn I I had to make a rule in my life I don't allow myself to repeat negative things about myself even if I think they're true because it's not going to serve me how do you interrupt your patterns I literally say I don't allow myself to think that no stop like whatever I'll sometimes even say it out loud also I have found if people ever find me making this face that face breaks negativity I can't hold that look on my face and feel negative it puts me in an aggressive move forward posture now also I find that I'm gonna have that those lines etched into my face because I do that so often but it really makes me feel powerful and so doing little things like that no I don't do that overwhelm is one I don't do overwhelm and so I say that to myself all the time because I feel myself getting overwhelmed and so I'm always trying to tell people when I say I don't do overwhelm I don't mean that in like a cool way that like oh I'm so tough I I just don't allow myself to go down that path and because to your point about self-awareness I've spent so much time identifying why I feel a certain way without judgment oh that's insecurity it's emotional weakness whatever not not in any way shape or form trying to be cool about it just okay I feel that way because I'm insecure about this thing cool but because I have that level of self-awareness and because I force myself to do things that take my emotional awareness I'm feeling a thing to being able to articulate what thing I am feeling and then why I'm feeling it when I feel to me it feels like my brain is revving up that's what overwhelm feels like my brain is moving faster and faster and faster and faster to the point where it's not it's not a level of efficiency it's overwhelm it's just it's too much it's revving too fast it's like being in first gear and stamping on yes that's exactly what I pictured in my mind's eye too A Car in park yet stepping on the gas you hear all this rev but it's not any place where it's going to get momentum correct that was a very interesting analogy that that is exactly what overwhelm feels like to me so when I hear that I'm like nope I don't do overwhelm stop and just by saying that breathing from my diaphragm it's like you can change the neurochemistry you're having a biological experience so I'm reminding myself even going back to what you were saying you're having a panic attack you think you're having a heart attack you go outside I happen to I've heard the story so I know you feel the Sunshine on your face you get some fresh air you take some deep breaths oh whoa okay it's passed even if it was a heart attack and so changing your state you know just stealing directly from Tony Robbins the ability to change your state will change your life but you have to get control of that and so getting people this all goes back to this you have this glowing orb inside of you you have to understand I think that your point about you can raise that up over time that's the area to focus whether you have it or not when you're born to me whatever our job is to uncover it and then to raise that dimmer so that it's it's really kicking off some wattage but to do that you have to think right bro what if the whole meaning of life was like we're all born with that orb or light lit fully covered with dozens of layers maybe you have 20 I have 18 he's got 32 meaning of life is uncover it and when you don't you will suffer with depression anxiety stress overwhelm which is consciousness telling you you're not doing what you should be you're shielding you're soothing you're distracting you're doing all these things instead of working on self because when you take off that last layer like potential has been achieved but well before taking off that last layer maybe five layers six layers in now you're hitting your stride in life like I feel like the last you know the soul 11 years ago was when I had that panic attack anxiety attack that led me to Dr Kevin uh that led me to so much self-work a decade of self-work but about I'd say about five years years in so I started feeling like this Rhythm like all right man like I'm really doing it the body hockey sticks and more businesses and more opportunities and I get in the best shape of my life and it's not even like you have to take off that last layer to achieve Bliss maybe that's like your Peak State and whether we all get there or not I don't know but I think what if that was it you just nailed it all the meaning of life is there's your orb congratulations it's covered with a [ __ ] ton of Gunk your job is to take the layers off and in the process of taking those layers off that's the self-work that's doing the Deep work how boring would life be if we're like yeah I'm not what I'm supposed to do it's interesting so I think that the that is so close to how I would define the meaning of life the way I've always thought of it in my head is the first of all whatever life only has a meaning that you give it I don't think there is any truly intrinsic meaning but I think everybody should have an answer my answer is the meaning of life the reason we're all here is to see how much of your potential you can turn into skill set and so if pushing the metaphor and I'm not sure this is entirely what you meant but if that glowing orb is it's you now have something that's useful that lights the way that allows you to move forward in the way that you want that that feels really close to to what I think people ought to be doing it seems to me and I've been on this path like intentionally and in a very focused way like in a ruthlessly focused way the last decade that for me again that is the meaning of my life to just keep removing the layers what is Pedro's 2.0 10.0 going to look like and again but I'm also so convicted by my belief system that I can I also know I could will things into being so like I can will the universe to work collude with me right conspire with me which also I goes back to like your rules like I also believe the universe has rules and it's like hey man you thought of something yeah every second that passes says the universe to me in my mind every second that passes I'm gonna make it less achievable so you thought of something you just learned a new skill do it [ __ ] do it yeah but it's not gonna be right Mr Universe I know it's not but you could either wait to get it down correctly but you're going to be so in the deficit because all the number of minutes and hours and months that go by that I've struck you know all these strikes against you or if you do it now take imperfect action you just learned it deploy it you can course correct like the universe is testing you like do I want to keep rewarding this guy for this idea I'm like oh my God I did it it's scary is it going to work it's like well it kind of worked okay well great but can you fix it yes I can I'm going to keep fixing it it's this cool thing where whether to call it the rules call it the Universe I really believe that the self-work and the rules and taking that orb that's glowing and trying to raise its Radiance the more we do we do develop these skill sets like these skill sets exist but we uncover them unearth them and then we could use it to make money have meaning leave an impact have significance create a legacy I suppose we could also use it for evil but that goes back to character core values and all that other [ __ ] right yeah that that's a whole another conversation because I think most people that from the outside we go that person's evil they they never think they're evil no but there's something you said that I want to um go deeper on so I am reading this book called The Evolution of everything by Matt Ridley and he talks about because you were saying like you need to take imperfect action the universe conspires with you if you're the first person that it's going to get harder the longer you wait and in the book he's talking about the a potential explanation for why that really is and his theory is that because everything evolves literally everything that um electricity gets invented and the light bulb is going to be invented necessarily after electricity but that it will be a certain period of time after electricity that you get the light bulb based on what kind of filaments are there can you blow glass like there's all these things that have to come together right so uh and he points out that like we think of these moments of um that inventions are these moments of genius and that it's this one person that sort of propelled us forward in this great leap and he said he doesn't think that the world actually works that way that what's happening is things are evolving and things will happen at a given point based on that Evolution and that they're uh there are like eight different people that have been credited with the invention of the light bulb and it's only because we're in the west that we think of Thomas Edison but in reality in different countries almost at exactly the same time other people came up with a light bulb and that there was the same thing I forget another really famous invention I'm forgetting it was a telephone or the phonograph whatever but it was like they the the patent was filed in the patent office on the same day and it's a really interesting idea and uh Michael Jackson said the same thing he called I think it was Quincy Jones in the middle of the night and he's like Quincy I just had an idea for a song and we have to record it and he's like why do we have to record it right now Mike it's like three in the morning he said because if we don't record it right now Prince is going to and he was like but it's just a random [ __ ] idea that you've had what are you talking about how would Prince know he's like no like once it's out there it's out there the ethers of the universe yeah and I think what he was really getting is gives me the chills what he's getting at is there's all this [ __ ] going on in the world and it all comes together and it it we're all the product of our time this really freaks me out as somebody trying to have a second um like Arc in his entrepreneurial career it's like I got it so right with Quest and now I'm trying to do something totally different in a totally different field and I'm like oh there's really something to am I am I of the moment because a kid growing up now they're they're just of the moment they're not thinking like I didn't think about quest Quest was me and look it was me and my partners don't get me wrong it was this Confluence of three people but just to keep it about the part of me that was me I was reacting against being an entrepreneur chasing money uh I was like this is so gross I just want to be myself this idea uh wanting authenticity wanting to build community all of this but I had it as a as a I was moving away from all the [ __ ] that I saw that I didn't like about building businesses and it happened to coincide right with social media now I was on the bleeding edge of social media not because I was clever because I was having a big emotional reaction and I decided to pursue it and so I was of that moment and so all of those things that happened to coincide right as social media was coming boom Quest hockey sticks it goes crazy and like if you think about what you built if that had been in 2019 it would be a very different story right right and so all this idea of like it's out there sort of in The Ether and are we able to have the balls to move when it strikes us because it's out there for everybody well said you know what there is something to you know being in that moment right and so are you saying then that you feel like in the second Arc you feel differently than you did the first time around like you know too much are you too not that I know too much it's that I really had to so I spent about a million dollars launching a comic book and it was a financial waste because I was making comics for when I was reading comics and I was reading comics in the late 80s early 90s and so then my instinct was to make films like the films that I had when I was a kid but that's done man it's dead and gone like kids don't even think about that and so I in my 40s had to go in this journey of like okay wait comic books are still getting turned into movies so who's doing it right that leads you to Japan which then ultimately leads you to ask the question why does a single title a single title bedros in Japan outsells the entire Western comic Market okay outsells Wonder Woman Batman Spiderman uh Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles X-Men all of it combined is outsold by Demon Slayer and so I was like how the [ __ ] is that possible and looking at it then leads me to this idea that they call Shonen which translates as the few years so they had narrowed in on this idea which is now I know known as the age of imprinting 11 to 15 where the brains in a really weird state which is why power of myth taking kids on these Journeys that you guys are now doing which is incredible where you have to have this rite of passage but the reason that a rite of passage happens that that [ __ ] age is because you your brain is in this hyper malleable state where it's no longer drinking from the parents is drinking from culture and so now in my 40s I had to discover Manga and Anime and like really being in it and so it it's it's now very calculated I'm trying to learn I'm trying to figure out like what this moment is now maybe I've learned so much that's perfect and maybe I'm now at because I feel like I'm at The Cutting Edge of something I feel again the way I felt the quest where I see something other people don't see but I had to brute force it whereas at Quest I was of the moment yeah so I'm like I don't know like my whole life I get to answer this question is [ __ ] fascinating to me I'm totally unafraid of failure like that just is not a concern for me are you as into anime as you were in the comic books of art now this scares me I've sang this to my mom this weekend I don't know if everyone is as malleable as I am and they just don't do the thing I have a process I can walk people through it this is what you have to do if you want to fall in love with something new or is it not a process and what it is a process but that it won't work for most people and it works for me because by Nature I just happen to be hyper malleable I don't know the answer so I act as if anybody can do it but I don't know if that's true and I'm terrified by the 50 of us that's hardwired because some people don't meet minimum requirements bro okay can I tell you something about yourself that I've figured out about you please you my opinion I'm just going to share my opinion please that I think you give too much credit to the hard wiring and not enough credit to the [ __ ] Savage that you are interesting I only think about the Savage and the only reason I acknowledge the hard wiring is I've I'm watching culture walk a stupid line where they're acting like there is no hard wiring and that's going to end in [ __ ] disaster because you can no longer predict the outcome of your actions So speaking of which page Rose let's talk about this new movement in your life I know your sun setting the Empire podcast yeah starting something new yeah why yeah uh so you know vampire podcast well part of it is phases of life right like we all go through seasons of life and so when I was broke and you know living in Section 8 housing when we first came to the United States it all I wanted was money because I remember the conversation in our house and when you're when you're the small one in the house I was six years old and we came to America so my older brother was 19 my sister was 21. my mom and dad and my older brother and sister are always talking about how we're running out of money before we run out of month like every end of the month it was always having to make a choice between do we leave the water on or the electricity on and there's always water because you could live in the dark you can't live without water in the section 8 housing apartments that we lived in in Santa Ana and um so I kind of grew up thinking like money's going to solve a lot of problems and so I want money I want money and so as you as you become an entrepreneur you have money and then soon you cover your costs and and have a good life and give your family experiences and you start realizing all right there's more to life than money and so Seasons phases of life and so but and it turns out I was good at making money you do anything long enough maybe part of it is that 50 hard wiring the other part might have been just me being so desperate for it I just looked at any Mentor I could find from Old School copywriters like Gary Halbert all the way to you know people that really focused on how the mind operates from like the Tony Robbins is and Beyond um and so the Empire podcast was really about me sharing my gift of being an entrepreneur and how to turn any idea into into a business and that business into an Empire and then if you want to sell it sell it if you want to scale it scale it and go on but I realized especially right around 2019 2020 with the pandemic and all that holy hell man like we are in a place where Society is not doing well now we see how depression and anxiety has gone through the roof we see the prescription drugs for mood altering prescription drugs that are up by 400 percent especially during the core of the pandemic suicide suicide grades all those things right and so I was like man I'm in a place where I'm able to Mentor my kids and they're staying at home thankfully they're in a good head space we're working out but then we're going on Hikes we're talking to them about what's happening in the world like school kids no we don't homeschool them but they go to private school and uh you know the way I explain to them is hey guys this is your Great Depression this is your Great Depression this is uh your version of my 911 you know that we experience where there's uncertainty and chaos and economic crash Etc and and so rather than having them be afraid of it like you guys are of age you know there are so 12 and 14 at the time of the pandemic and so talking to them walking them through it because I just figured my dad never did that with me like I love my dad he brought us here he risked his life to bring us to the United States but everything else was on a need to know basis and I didn't need to know and so the Empire podcast was all about that making money building Empires the bedrose coolian show that's launching here is me talking about culture me talking about Community me talking about how we're it just seems like this is a perfect scientific artistic design to they're trying to separate us by left and right by black and white by mask and no mask facts and no vax by if they can if they can separate us by shoe sizes bro I feel like they would and I feel this they like do you believe in a grand conspiracy the new world order that kind of stuff I don't know if it's a new world order but I do believe that that they is a very smart group of powerful people that run the world and there is a smart group of powerful people they're called the heads of state and the people that voted them into or not voted them that financially enabled them to get into their have control a great example of that and I always use it as a micro economy like a micro scale I'm the president no longer the CEO but I'm the president of Fit Body Boot Camp a franchise right you could look at as every franchise location we've got hundreds of franchise locations as a state the clients in there as the citizens of that state now I could say that um we're going to start using Tom billu's water and I can mandate all franchisees to start using it and Tom Billy is going to give me HQ the president a kickback from using that water instead of the other water but now I can force my franchise used to use that and I'm a franchisees have to then Force their clients their citizens to use that I could raise the prices I could raise the franchise royalty fees and I could justify it by saying whatever I want and if you don't comply you've well you've signed a franchise agreement that franchise agreement says that I could pull your franchise and make you de-brand and if you de-brand you lose your money I could stop sending your your money right and so it's I'm My Own Little Country when you look at a franchise it's a little country with a leader and states and citizens and so when I just look at it that way well it just makes sense that they exist the franchisors and so when you look at all different like what if I'm not saying this this doesn't happen but if me and the other franchisors across many Industries hell let's just say Fitness industry come together and we're like hey from now on we're all going to raise the franchise buy and feed to 80 grand and not lower minus 49.6 right now right 80 grand so we can spire on that and we're the franchise royalty fees are not going to be seven percent anymore it's going to be 10 across the board right if we all conspire to do that now whatever franchise brand you want to open up it seems like six and one half dozen in the other really what we did is we conspired together just like the universe might conspire and people conspire to do things and again you know everyone's got best of intentions but they say the path to hell was paved with good intentions and so do I believe in that they I do believe that there's a they in some point maybe they did go into power to there's power absolute power is absolutely corrupt bro we're not supposed to be this powerful we're not we're not I I plan on giving away as much of my money as I can so that I save my son and daughter from corruption money is corrupt money is corrupt when you don't make it yourself I believe that it's another personal belief that I have I earned mine I built mine from the ground up with my wife certainly stood on the shoulders of giants and watched what they did and modeled that and paid for coaching and got the results from it but if I just hand them all the assets and I hand them all the passive streams of income I do believe that they will [ __ ] on their lives that is probably the biggest thickest blanket I could put on their Radiance that's interesting in my opinion and so anyhow I do believe that there is some level of conspiring happening at the top and so when you look at it that way why divide us what's the what do you think is the purpose the internet did something especially as we're entering web 3.0 bro it created freedom in a way that we hadn't seen our like you remember pre-internet I remember pre-internet vividly right and like I would have to get on a bus and go to Service Merchandise or whatever to buy something or gemco or zody's or whatever the department store was now I could Amazon Prime it and it's here the next day it's exactly what I wanted and now anyone can create a channel the YouTube a network a platform the internet has given us so much freedom and that freedom and humans are like we take an inch we'll take a mile that's just how we are we have gotten too free and I I'm pretty sure it gotten too scary going back to the franchise model if my franchisee started to add a juice bar and I said nothing about it and now they're adding squat racks because Fit Body boot camps don't have squat racks now they looks like a a CrossFit now they're adding child care right like hey now they're going to monetize more with child care but wait a minute that's Child Care is not part of the Fit Body model it's a whole different liability insurance plus you have to have certified people like watching those kids like you can't just do that now you guys have too much Freedom I've got to bring the compliance officer of Fit Body Boot Camp down on your ass isn't it the same thing the web the economy has been good for so long so long and this web has given people so much freedom that I believe that they needed to create something to create this Division and control and compliance of humanity um and so let's tighten the Noose down again because it's compliance the compliance officer coming down on us is how I see it on regular P I hate to say it this way on the civilians on Regular People wage earners because first they were going to tax you on us we're going to tax the rich they're going to tax you and us and I'm like no don't do that because me and Tom know how to pass that cost along to you I would raise my prices I will find a way to still make my product profitable you the customer and the employees will end up paying for it because I'm too clever and then to tax you they will create inflation and they did right and and so anyway that's I don't know if we're getting political but but that's how I do believe that control and compliance is being exercised right now by them yeah it's interesting I sometimes worry that I'm too naive so I don't have a sense of the they I am willing to accept that that probably is naivete because I hear your example and that makes a lot of sense to me and somebody has to be uh getting funding people to run campaigns and all that at the end of the day we elect but here in the in the west anyway but going back to this idea of the evolution of everything that you know Cycles happen and um you've got Ray dalio mapping out these cycles and Empires rise and they fall and the reason he says that that cycle just repeats endlessly is because there are only so many human personality types again why I think about the 50 that's hardwired even though in my own life I'm only thinking about the malleable part is that if there's only so many personality types then of course things are going to repeat because you just find people bumping into each other and there's a finite number of ways that those personality types will interact and they get in these sort of cause and effect loops and and they just are what they are and it doesn't repeat exactly but it Rhymes and it Rhymes because enough changes and we're we there's just like the Earth isn't just rotating around the Sun we're also actually flying through space right so there's directionality to everything so there's directionality to culture but there's also this sort of loop right even though we're going that way in things do change but there's a lot of rhyming that goes on so I don't think a lot about the they but I'm willing to just say okay but what I do think a lot about is as social media has come along it's an evolutionary moment right so we couldn't have predicted how social media was going to impact us and the bad news is it's not all bad in fact I would say it's primarily good but it's created this weird moment where because humans are so influenceable that I mean it's why they're called influencers that you end up getting this when you marry it to an algorithm with our desire to connect with another human and to be swayed by their influence if they have some sort of magnetism or whatever and then the algorithm just [ __ ] really goes oh this is what you respond to and so it takes you down these like hyper Niche holes and if you don't have a rule in your life that says You must seek disconfirming evidence you end up really seeing the world that way and it just seems true so whatever the algorithm is showing you it just feels that's the true narrow it doesn't feel like a narrative it's just that is true so to your point about okay we have division so I asked myself okay if I'm having a biological experience and when I say there are rules to this game I mean that the world Works a certain way based on the way that the human animal is based on gravity and physics and all of that stuff there just is a way that things work why are we able to split into camps of two why could they divide Us by our shoe size and hopefully people know about that study where you can give people a red shirt or a blue shirt and people will click up and automatically start treating people in the red shirt differently like what the [ __ ] you know it's make-believe but we were just tribal like that so it's Evolution so what is it that allows us to be so evenly parsed into these groups well left and right is the the basic thing that a tribe needs is you need some people that are um All About compassion so that we don't leave people behind that we have cohesion we're looking out for each other there's reciprocity but then you have if you look at that on um on a large enough sample what you find is then you get the freeloader problem so if we were all compassionate you get freeloaders who go oh word I'm in it there's an evolutionary Niche for just taking advantage of people it's like the the um the cuckoo bird which is where you get the idea of a cuckold from right cuckoo bird's like a word I can drop off my egg and your nest and you'll raise it and feed it and all that stuff amazing idea of a cuckold came from 100 no kidding yep so you always run into the freeloader problem so the other side of the equation has to be people that go no personal responsibilities everything now what you get is a group that works because you get people who are like yo you cannot just leave people behind you can't be tyrannical and not think about people you've got to love them and like you know worry about them and lift them up and you've got other people that are like hey you can't [ __ ] take advantage you've got to pick yourself up and you've got to like really a group only becomes strong as the weakest link and so we've all got to rise up now when you bring them together they're high functioning because it's in the friction between the two where it's like this half knows okay I need to like find Concessions where it's going to work and then this half is like okay we've got to find we really should look out for people and when they are working well then we Thrive but now the algorithm is pulling us down into these what's called Peak shift and I'm I'm thinking of this stuff out loud so everyone's gonna have to bear with me if a week from now I think very differently but this feels right to me so there's this idea of peak shift where if you take there's this bird that the mother has a big [ __ ] red nose beak and when the bird sees that big red beak it goes crazy and there was a research scientist that was like is it responding to the size of the beak to the fact that it's red like what actually makes a go mom like I'm gonna go into my Feeding Frenzy what they found was the brighter you could make an artificial one and the brighter you made the red the bigger you made the beak the crazier the chicks went and they just like went berserk they called that Peak shift so the algorithm is all about Peak shift oh you like that then you really like this you like that then you'll really like this and you begin to dopamine habituate and so it's just like ah it goes crazy people are in there scrolling all day you get one narrative it takes you down this one path you're not seeking disconfirming evidence you get tied into these influencers and if I can really put something that's hit me recently if you're feeling overwhelmed I guarantee there's a study on this even though I don't know it but I have felt this so I know it must be true if you're feeling overwhelmed and someone tells you hate that person it feels awesome because it's certainty well I know exactly what to do hate that [ __ ] they're wrong I'm right that feels awesome I agree people are Intoxicated by certainty so you just gave me certainty combined with all those other things and so now it's like even if there isn't a they and this is just spontaneously evolved we're living in this [ __ ] moment and so this is happening this is real and [ __ ] is getting weird and for the first time in my life I'm paranoid I'm like not literally paranoid but I'm like oh like I'm worried I'm worried that things go to Bloodshed that's my actual concern how does a paranoid Tom bilio prepare because I think I'm a bit extremist so I can't trust myself and I I'm selling this is good for your audience and for me I'm selling everything I don't want to be tied to anything massive Mobility read radelia he he wrote a book called principles for dealing with the changes and he said you need to be mobile you need to be able to go basically wherever stability is um I've heard you talk about this so I know you know the concept get off the X yeah I don't know where the x is going to be but I know that I own a lot of real estate and I probably shouldn't so that's move number one now I don't think I'm the guy people should listen to I'm [ __ ] fumbling my way through this I just want to make moves I was just curious what your move was but that that's where yeah I think Mobility is key like my personal feeling and opinion is that liquidity and Mobility is key yep today more than ever like all everyone who's stockpiling like guns and weapons and like making that underground bunker like I haven't gone that far I think it's quite the opposite like that's all great what do you mean it's the opposite the I think the vision that most people have is when they come to take my property or to take my [ __ ] to rape and pillage like I will me and my wife will defend you know our canned food and our gold and our with our guns and ammo hmm yeah not really first of all I think statistically less than like 99 of people have any training with their weapons number one number two most people are ill prepared if that were the the apocalypse should hit the fan thing was going to happen and because I actually studied with these the guys like uh John Lovell Warrior Poet Society and others like them who have been actual true Warriors like they don't think about hunkering down they're all about liquidity and Mobility like very intelligent Warriors who understand that I've got to be liquid and mobile because I don't know where yeah the x is going to be but I know I won't be on it and the resource that helps is obviously money right yeah and I hope man I hope I'm just being paranoid and that ah it's like a healthy paranoia yeah I mean it's when it keeps you up at night it's when you begin I believe there's a Tipping Point to anything like my dad was taking uh whatever like two baby aspirin a day his heart's doing just fine I bet if he took a handful a day he'd probably burn a hole in his stomach it's it's when we hit the Tipping Point which goes back to your social media example that the algorithm sucks us down this hole this rabbit hole is so accurately and gets us to believe that this is truly the reality and if we are not looking for the contrary actively looking for it we will begin to believe that this is a [ __ ] it hits the fan moment and I must I must prepare and what preparation looks like for one guy may be very different than the other no doubt yeah you were born in soviet-controlled Armenia yes sir how is that informed the what you're telling your kids about this moment might be the most interesting way to ask that as you were talking about see this is why I like hanging out with you this is the most selfish thing I do like like whether it's food with you or just this it's like I do realize that when you've grown up under communist control and then when your dad was a member of the Communist party and so he kind of tell you you grew up hearing the story so seeing it and then hearing the stories it does influence you and the way you think like oh shoot that government did that like they literally went to oppress the citizens like there was just different classes my dad was part of the 18 of the society and the Soviet Union who had a uh this different colored dark red passport and I remember he'd be able to get bread and cheese from any store that he wanted when they were out and there were lines me and my mom would have to wait in lines until my dad became a member of the Communist party and we never once waited in the line again in fact I grew up eating caviar we talked about this in your in your previous uh show the last time you interviewed me I was eating caviar in Armenia for breakfast and then come here and I'm eating like out of dumpsters and Section 8 housing so talk about it but that government did oppress its people and so I do realize that I look through life through those lens at times and so hearing you talk about like hey what if this is just like really good algorithm doing what it's supposed to do oh [ __ ] what if all right so okay I'm a little less paranoia cool more preparation yeah and then just live your life and just live your life um but it just breaks my heart when I see dude when I see people this far apart like our country Humanity has never been this far apart and and maybe we need it we need to go so far apart where we feel the pain and then get back together again um and maybe it's that I'm 48 years old and I've got more gray than I've ever had and I'm realizing that I've had a really good life experience and worried from what my kids are going to have as a life experience like what's going to happen for them and their kids like I want to I can't wait to hold Andrew and Chloe's babies but I also know I'm gonna be like [ __ ] what's life going to look for like for them so I'm so hell-bent on trying to influence Society humanity and what I feel is a better way and I know it's you know hindsight's always 20 20 and things always are more glamorous when you look back but how simple was it for us dude growing up in the 80s and 90s you know like all right so you got your Walkman you got your CD player your like there was no fentanyl to to overdose on there was I wouldn't say though I was legitimately afraid of nuclear war really I mean that was like a thing and I was right at that age where my amygdala was just 80 of my brain during the Cold War yeah yeah and it was like Hey this mutually assured destruction I remember having to explain that to my neighbors I don't know the reason they won't launch nuclear missiles is because of mutually assured destruction that's that's rough yeah so but I do remind myself of that like okay have we been this divided before probably I mean we were at Civil War like literal guns being fired Civil War people being killed so it's like we have gone through things like this and people rebound and we're super resilient but I don't think it happens by accident and so it's like how do we you know nudge each other back in a loving direction is how I think about it um but how do we I think it comes with the individual and I think that's where it comes when we try and change a whole party's ideology and belief system is not going to work it's going to be the individual like the individual watching this listening to this right now and going shoot I had two different ideas on on maybe the rules of life and how things work but then they kind of agreed that there is a Radiance within us whether it's we're born with it or we have to turn it on and then Stoke that fire um yeah I could I could bind to the idea of that there's something within us that needs to thrive so to your point the right place to start is with yourself right so trying to figure out okay what do I have wrong how do I be the open mind that comes to the table to try to you know find a path forward but I just don't feel like I have wisdom in this like Ray dalio talks a lot about things that have happened in history but that have not happened in your life and the things that are going on right now have happened in history but they haven't happened in my life and because I'm so experiential like for whatever reason I've always had to learn things the hard way and so yeah I don't know that I have any wisdom to impart here but in my I find it very fascinating and I really want to understand what's happening like what is this revealing about human nature I don't think we can ever count on the algorithm to do anything other than maximize um what humans respond to and unfortunately we respond to um certainty extraordinarily strongly which is the opposite of an open mind we respond to fear a lot more than the flip side it's going to be a lot harder to have a good news show than it is to have a bad news show right if it bleeds it leads and so all of these things are real so it's like okay I know all of these things are real what can I do like do you have advice I know you do I know the punchline to this but like what's your advice to people on social media like how do you deal with it how do you make it a part of your life do you not make it a part of your life I do it's a very big part of my life uh but I I divide social media people into two two camps consumers and creators and I believe that you're better off being a 90 Creator 10 consumer and that's what I am and I create content that the 1.0 version of me would want because I've been able to take myself from 1.0 to 2.0 and if 10.0 is my goal then when I get to 3.0 I'll create content for the 1.0 and 2.0 version of myself and if I feel like that's what you've done I have to see your Evolution over the last four or five years I I feel like you are coaching the younger Tom Toms who were who are like Tom 1.0 out there in society um it's it ain't it ain't rocket science that social media is a business and it is there to Stoke fear create a level of certainty and also it Stokes uncertainty so that we can be attracted to those that that speak in certainty that's what's beautiful about social media when you just look back at the hell that social media is it creates uncertainty and it's like okay well what do you mean well let's face it social media has probably caused a lot of kids to kill themselves like some kids have like been bullied been been felt like they don't belong fear of missing out right it's created this uncertainty within them and they felt the certainly the solution to this is death um and so we do have to see how powerful this thing is like anyone would be stupid to not look at Hitler or Bin Laden and and not realize there's something to take away from there that those those evil powers did have a great way of communicating that perhaps if we can learn that put it to good use that maybe we can do create good outcomes with it so my belief system on social media is to be a creator of content that the older version of you would benefit from and would help those people level up to the entire version of you and if we all did more of that and consumed less of it um there would be less influenced by it but I also realize like there's literally like variable response the whole idea of this like a very it's a casino thing right like you pull the slot machine do am I going to get the three cherries if I do I'm a winner [ __ ] I only got two cherries that was close let me try again with another 20 Bill variable response so variable response works on pumping out dopamine like no one's business bro they figured out how to get this thing our brain to pump out the right addictive chemicals so well that you do goes back to routine goes back to morning ritual rules and rituals I believe will save someone from going down the social media depression anxiety time suck vacuum that it really is yeah uh rule because I've got rules and rituals about it like I won't like more than three things right so if like you and Lisa and my friend Craig pop up and my first I'll like you three that's it if I just keep going I've now starting to suck to the variable response funnel and now I'm going to keep liking liking I will literally just go through all my friends [ __ ] and it'll show me stuff from yours like six weeks ago like there's no end to it so I've I create rules and rituals and when I have rules and rituals and also I know I have I'm an addictive person um and I think most of us are man uh that's why we're so easily to get addicted to social media I'm an addictive person and so I know that I'm more susceptible to to getting addicted to that pattern and that pattern could and then I'm also a CD so everything I do is obsessive that's a bad combination right apparently not for entrepreneurial not entrepreneurial success touche but in that path oh my God man to get addicted to it and then to go OCD on it forget about it like this is why man I could eat a bag of bagels my wife was like that's like a Baker's Dozen 13 bagels and two things of Philadelphia cream cheese like where did it go like I must finish it all Tom I can't leave anything half finished even Bagels how long would it take you to eat 13 bagels or I would stand at the Kitchen Buffet um 45 minutes no way did you not I thought you were gonna say four days no dude whoa that's interesting I have an obsessive mind but not a I don't have an addictive personality so I don't find myself doing that if I I don't like eat one chip and then I'm fine but I'm like food used to be more of a problem for me food is not a problem but I thrive on rules to your point what are some rules and rituals that you have in place so we know the social media one yeah so there's a social media one uh you know going back full circle to a morning routine uh the best morning routines I believe start in the evening so some of the rules that I have read right right um no iPhone no no no no no starting at what time uh for me at 9pm because I go to bed at 10 okay no iPhone no iPad no laptop hour before bed hour before bed what are you doing talking to Diana we're either watching uh we'll typically watch right now we're watching uh the blues uh oh my God where they built it's a comedy show oh yeah yeah yeah oh God Arrested Development there we go you're watching that with the kids so we'll watch one episode of the blues or the rest of the development then we'll go in the hot tub because we'll [ __ ] around in the pool while we're going and the hot tub is just relaxation yeah talking that's a rule too to relax talk 20 minutes 30 minutes while the kids goof off and then they go in the hot tub with us and we all get out they go to bed we go to bed 10 o'clock lights out um that's just how it worked out but the screen's off by nine o'clock in terms of computer laptop and iPad we do watch a show and then go into the hot tub uh number one number two bring the 30 ounces of water upstairs with me because if I'm gonna drink 30 ounces of water in the morning it needs to be on my nightstand otherwise it might take me 20 minutes to get there if I'm showering and doing all this [ __ ] um create my GSD list the night before I believe taking that stuff out of my brain and putting it on a notepad just allows me to do a brain dump and I always put the hardest scariest thing that I'm going to do tomorrow morning the thing I want to avoid at the top of my GST list right it's common sense and it's not swirling around in my head and my subconscious mind is keeping me awake thinking about it it's on a list of three to four things to do the worst one at the top of that list and so again that's another one of my evening rituals and I'll set my alarm and and lights out off I go um but but some other rules are that if there's people who always and uh to date I've got 119 people blocked on my phone some friends some clients former clients I guess I should say some just people who were friends but it's the people that go hey Tom did you see this article about your brand your company your thing and it's always negative the ones that always do like [ __ ] did you hear that I was on the Inc magazine did you hear that I was an entrepreneur magazine's top 500 fasting franchises I didn't see you text me the link to that right but you hear that somebody died at a Fit Body Boot Camp it's a gym people do die at a Fit Body Boot Camp you know all of a sudden you're sending me did you hear that somewhere in Tallahassee Florida somebody died at a Fit Body Boot Camp thank you I'm aware of that right and so people who are just so quick to show up with negative news especially via text I just block them like I'll see a pattern I don't tell them or whatever like I'm gonna block you you gotta not do that but if I see someone's got that pattern in my life they are addicted to causing drama I don't need that so that's one of my main rules as well of blocking them on my phone uh at which point they could just call the house line and talk to Marlon my house manager and not me at which point she'll leave a little notepad note and that's that those are my big major rules and then but mostly on social media create 90 percent consume 10. you have rules man I think that this is one of the most underutilized things for people that want to be successful you really you have to one identify what are the things that I struggle with what are rules that I can put in place for me the biggest one I know we've talked about this before is I have to be out of bed in 10 minutes or less because otherwise I will lose hours man it's crazy like I am still shocked I when it comes to laying in bed I'm like an alcoholic it's like no matter how many years go by that I don't do it I still every day want to do it it's super weird and I just find myself wanting to to lay in bed how do you like and maybe you feel like you've always had this but how do you teach other people to be a Savage you talk about being a servant Savage and the need to be capable of that savagery yeah one do you mean Savage literally or do you just mean being tough like how do you think about that both both I'm sure you would jump to my throat and like attempt to kill me and probably kill me if I even made any attempt to attack Lisa like you need to be a Savage right but you're also a Savage in creating your your businesses and and and the impact Theory show um a Savage and like doesn't matter how you feel you're up doing your show you're up doing your ritual you're up stacking your wins it might be walking like molasses during days that you're not maybe you didn't sleep well or having an off day but you're still savagely going through your day so Savage in both ways I do believe that those who are skilled in the art of violence are least likely to become violent and I've known this really interesting why do you say that because of my experience as a kid see growing up in Section 8 housing uh so so in in Russia Judo and [ __ ] are some martial arts that were really big in the Soviet Union so my dad taught me that very quickly Judo [ __ ] and then as soon as I became uh 11 years old he put me into Kempo Karate kicking and and punching and this is pre-ju Jitsu era uh and growing up in Section 8 housing so I'm the Foreigner imagine me the Foreigner kid with the funny bull haircut and the clothes that my mom made in the section 8 housing and and uh in Santa Ana there was a game called f troop they're still out there causing violence uh but my dad had bought me a little bike like from a garage sale like eight bucks or something dude it was like Rusty and but it worked right and then these gang bangers stole it and they lived in the same complex in the neighboring complex they stole it I went I went home kind of crying like hey this is what happened my dad gave me a beating because that's what the Communist Dad does and when I told that to Kevin by the way my therapist he's like hey anything ever happened to you as a kid like do you want to talk about because he helped me with my stress and anxiety and all that stuff right that was the reason I went to a therapist I was like no man like no there's nothing as a kid that I want to talk about like okay I might he goes well what about your parents he goes well what about your parents I want my parents you know my mom spanked me my dad gave me a beating but I would have rather had those beatings and spankings than like all my other friends they were put on restriction for two weeks they're gonna come out and play with their GI Joes with me like they really have to like pay the price I just got a good beating and I can go out and play again Kevin and he's laughing he goes that didn't leave a scar on you I'm like nah I go plus what happened to me as a kid even before that was even worse but that's where I had enough I apparently built enough Rapport and trust with him where I hinted to what had happened to me hence being molested and that's how we what was supposed to be one month of therapy ended up being 15 16 months because then we started working on what happened to me as a kid but anyway going back to the Savage and the servant what I found was that when my dad was he beat me and he goes if you don't come back with your bike the beatings will continue whoa because that was a lot of money he spent eight bucks for having three four jobs living in Section 8 housing about eight bucks can go towards food and water and all this other stuff that he put towards a bike give me a flathead screwdriver and as I go get the bike I didn't have to ask him what I do with the flathead screwdriver wow and so it was simple enough that the more violence I could cause the more compliant they became are you a big kid I I was a bigger kid yeah I was a I was a stocky kid and my two friends in America were my first friends in America were were black Section 8 housing it's either Mexicans black kids or foreigners Dwayne and Torrance Torrance I found and when we stay in touch Torrance Jackson in Anaheim Dwayne I have no idea but he lived in apartment number 22 at the Shade Tree Apartments God I still remember that we played snake in the grass together and all this so them two had my back and we went and got my bike and it didn't even have to take any use of the flathead screwdriver to get my bike back because they understood why we were there and and so but I realized in that moment that like all right sometimes violence is is the way but I also understood that violence could work against me when a whole bunch of them showed up and whooped my ass uh many years later put me in the hospital um all this to to tell you that you begin to and now man doesn't matter how big someone is how wiry someone is how muscular someone is some of those Jiu Jitsu or they've taken the you know a few months of of Muay Thai kickboxing like they will just like meatloaf your face right in or just take take the air out of your brain and you're you're passed out and so today people are more dangerous than ever and when you realize that I don't know what do they say in Texas like an armed Society is a polite Society well technically most people these days with the knowledge of violence that they have um I just want to treat everyone as though you know Jiu Jitsu you know kickboxing you might have a flat head screwdriver in your back pocket and therefore I'm going to be cool to you so I'm going to be a servant but I love knowing that I could show up as a Savage knowing that I don't really pull that card out unless I have to uh and the Savage is also the guy or gal who's willing to they see a car accident everyone else is rubber necking and you know taking video like that Savage is someone who's running to that car breaking the glass window and pulling out the people out of it right they're willing to stand in the gap between good and evil um I don't know if I shared this with you on your show last time I was here my family and I we do our annual trip to Maui right around Christmas it's just something that we we enjoyed Hawaii when we got married for our honeymoon so we decided to do an annual trip with the kids um several years back Andrew was probably six Chloe was four we're flying back it's one of the from Maui we took an 11 pm flight back from Maui to LAX and uh it's those big jumbo Jets where there's like the lay down seats up front like in the in the middle and on the sides and so we're in the very back of first class we all have our fun seats and then but way up front in first class there's a dude going off like smashing the seat I didn't tell you the story no okay so he's smashing dude we're up at like 35 000 feet up in the air we're over the Pacific Ocean bro like he should have done this on the tarmac where they could have removed him he smashing the seat back in front of him and now the dude's like dude bro relax what's going on and he's just like foaming at the mouth going bananas people have gotten up and kind of gotten into that Galley where they make your coffee and all that stuff and uh I look at my wife next to hers Chloe across the aisle my wife and Chloe and next to me is Andrew Andrew looks at me I'm like buddy everything's gonna be okay I look at my wife she looks at me I just like Hey we're gonna be fine Chloe's knocked out sleeping I look at the guy behind my wife he's he's now sitting this thing up right and we made this eye contact like no words were spoken no words were spoken Tom but I just knew he had my back and I know he knew that I had his back now I'm thinking this is post 911. something happens like we're all going to Dogpile in this bad guy right because No One's Gonna Die because you're not Landing this thing in the water so you got to make sure this guy just goes down so anyway long story short we see the flight attendants go all the way to the back they're coming down our end of the aisle their plans to cut through the galley to create a wall between angry ballistic mad guy making the gun gesture and hitting everyone's seat they're trying to make a human wall between him and the cockpit got it so as they're coming down I see two interlaced black handcuffs those zip ties and I like stopped the flight attend like ma'am is everything okay how can we help like she goes he's a fight risk we need to ask him to put these on and I I'm like well can we help and she goes we have to ask him to put these on I guess the law is they have to ask you Tom so the next time if you decide to lose your [ __ ] on the plane he has to agree he has to agree interesting they come in front of him three flight attendants and you can see this older lady flight attendant gesturing like got to put this on he stands up he's like I'm not putting those [ __ ] things on she looks up towards me and like help I look at this guy just through the corner of my eye and I see him standing up and we both I had just finished remember I told you I did the six week uh Marathon challenge I just since then I've been doing like about two challenges a year I just finished an MMA challenge nice I was like all right man I want to learn to really fight right let's see how this works yeah with at the time King of the cage Welterweight Champion Aaron Weatherspoon awesome tiny little guy tatted up peaceful until he brought me on the mats and he would just have his way with me but in six weeks he he taught me some really cool stuff um and then he went in the ring and beat the [ __ ] out of me because every six week challenge has to end with either a marathon or whatever right so anyway that's a different story so I we go and that's just me and this guy and I I look at this guy he's like what are you going to do about it I was like bro just put those things on like just like it be cool right I'm wearing flip-flops and I got my Hilo Hattie shirt on it's like [ __ ] we're coming from Maui dude um sweating profusely because I'm nervous he goes to shove me and I did exactly what Aaron Weatherspoon taught I parried out of the way got behind him and got him in a rear naked Chokehold Tom I'm not gonna lie to you bro I hope Aaron Weatherspoon never sees this video in the back of your mind you're like okay I'm paying this guy to coach me so like the times that I got him in an arm bar or rear naked Chokehold or Guillotine maybe he was just like kind of going with it you know he really wasn't choking he just tapped because I'm paying him right dude it worked so I'm trying to this guy I'm choking this guy out I'm on his back I'm talking in his ear like dude just calm down now he's bucking like a Bronco I'm sliding out of my flip-flops because I'm sweating and I'm wearing flip-flops and he's taller than me so I'm I'm like my toes right I'm like that's right Aaron said like when that happens take a deep breath it'll tighten up more and then he started to like crumple over top Jesus it's working he's on his knees I'm on his back now I'm like [ __ ] now the one dude who's here to help me he's trying to wedge he's trying to wedge the zip ties between my gut and his back and bring his arms back and it's not working I'm like okay what would Aaron do I quickly got him in a guillotine Chokehold you know the old elementary school get a kid and then choke hold and walk him around the campus thing that would happen to me all the time because I'd get bullied right so dude I flipped around and gone I mean the guillotine and it worked and this guy zip ties him he zipped had really too tight and so the zip tight cut into him so with the re-zip time that's a different story but anyway flight attendants made us sit in the back with him we take turns Jesus yeah we've got all the hummus and wine you could drink and eat uh on the flight and then we landed in LAX LAPD took him away and that was that but all this to say that thank God that my dad had instilled this Savage mindset in me like you have to be the one that does something son you can't just be the one who goes hey someone should do something about that and so that's always been my mindset it's if I have to cross my arms and go someone should do something about that maybe I should be the one maybe I should be the one funding that movement maybe I should be the one saving that person out of the fire or saving that flight whatever the thing is and so I've always but but I also want to show up as a servant and love you up and and how much value can I add to your life and what could I do to connect because I also realize I'm a big commanding guy and so I could come off as a threat so look I see a ping pong table everybody let's play ping pong you know plus I enjoy it so anyway that's I believe the more Savage servants we can build the more confident capable protectors and providers we will have men will finally feel that they have this role in their life their every guy feels like they want to have conflict like we have this thing called the project it's a 75 hour men's personal development program but a 75-hour strike great so my lead instructor for it Ray is a former Navy SEAL then we have the psycho sociopathic form Marine I've learned not to say former Marine once a marine always a marine apparently then there's me teaching life productivity time management building businesses because they're all entrepreneurs that come to this thing MMA fighter uh former SWAT operator teaches pistols and rifle stuff and so we really T 90 of these guys when the Marine asks how many of you [ __ ] have never hit another man before 90 of the hands go up how many of you have ever choked out another man 90 uh have never choked out on a hands go up and so realize yet they still have a desire you're a man you have this desire to be aggressive to to have some level of conflict to be able to like but you can't because Society has neutered us so much and so there we teach these guys to be violent but to also learn how to control their violence so that they're not because otherwise when you never show your violence and you're Savage within you become a passive aggressive man and that is where toxic masculinity Begins the passive aggressive man the nice guy syndrome there's a great book out there called No More Mr Nice Guy that's the passive aggressive man that's you know toxic masculinity is the passive aggressive man who will yell at his wife and put his fist through a wall at home where it's safe but where when he's supposed to stand in the gap or raise his voice in a situation between where the opportunity of right and wrong are presented or jump out of a seat and choke a [ __ ] out he won't do that he won't do that because he's not really sure if I can I know I could probably yell at my wife and my kids and scare them well here's your chance to fight with a pugil stick here's your chance to wrestle a guy here's your chance and when they do they realize oh you know what first of all I could take a punch secondly I know what it feels like to get choked out and choke another man out you know I think I am going to go learn this thing on my own Jiu Jitsu or Muay Thai and every single one of them report back that they're more peaceful that they have less stress because you're on the mat two to three times a week or in the ring getting after it I literally have zero stress bro like because of it in terms of like where I want to like rage out and kill someone because I'm like somebody else might try and kill me like I'm just gonna be cool this is very interesting to me because it's the very thing that I know uh I have not focused on in my life and ought to but the first time that somebody put it on my radar was Frost the hobby who was the I don't know if he was the all-around MMA coach of George Saint Pierre but certainly the uh Jiu Jitsu coach for George Saint Pierre and had him on the show in the early early days and he said Tom I want to choose kindness I don't want kindness to be my only option I was like damn very good point and then Jordan Peterson has started talking about this recently where he looked at the phrase from the Bible the meek shall inherit the earth I have to admit this always bothered me because I always interpreted Meek as weak so I was like why would the weak inherit the earth it doesn't make sense like I know that it isn't true and so how does that like the Bible believe it as a literal thing or not it's got wisdom that's obviously lasted for a reason so I was like ah why does that resonate so Jordan Peterson whether he's right or not is another question but this feels right looks up I think the ancient Greek translation of Meek and it means to basically to be good with a sword but keep it sheathed and so there's a reason they didn't say the weak shall inherit the Earth but when you are a competent fighter then you can choose combat or you can choose not to but there's no internal conflict there's no uh nervous aggressive like a Chihuahua that's like barking and freaking out because it feels like it has to act big and tough because if if it can't get you to back down and it actually goes to blows now it's going to be in trouble because it doesn't actually know how to fight Bingo or just paralyzed like you said and they're they just stay because they're you know afraid that they won't be able to do anything and I do feel that that is one that as guys you do have that impulse that you get in an elevator and you think could I take this guy like even in business like it still does run across your mind and so to not address it I think does it to to not have that tool in Your Arsenal just robs you of one more thing but also it sets up what you're talking about where you've got people who are like guys are going to try to get laid full stop period end of story it just is what it is and so if you don't have that confidence you don't feel like you can be manly and sort of win over a woman's heart by being the sort of prototypical tough guy not even tough guy but like to have that yeah a dangerous man but but Meek in the that you're weaponized but you keep your weapon uh hidden then you go for the nice guy tactic oh the the subtlety the more feminine way of being Sly where it's reputational oh he's not the right guy for you anyway like they you know they slide in that way there's a whole strategy that in the animal kingdom there are actually like frogs that do this I think there are other ones as well where there is a legitimate male strategy where they try to look like a female and so they they can bypass the dominant male and they can mate it's crazy so it's uh it is a I fear a strategy that that guys are tempted to deploy but it isn't a confident grounded expansive strategy it's a uh sort of Shifty like secretive it's a desperate attempt it's not a good energy when that's your only tool you have to make that tool as useful as possible and so and a lot of dudes end up in in the nice guy friend category that's like hey how'd you become a friend you're kind of get laid and now you're a friend uh there was a comedian I forget the community comedian he goes all those people you just described those guys they're the dick in the jar now because then when that girl gets a boyfriend as in as soon as there's a conflict with the boyfriend and she goes I hate him I'm thinking of breaking up that's the guy who goes it's like in case of emergency break glasses right you know what yeah he is a bad guy he is a dick maybe maybe he's hoping that if he just also pisses on the boyfriend that he can get laid for the night like that's not a cool way to do it but if that guy also had the tools of confidence and he was capable and he knows how to protect but he also knows how to stay cool like Fonzie because there's no good even in the best fight where you win you still get hit I've been stabbed whoa I've got a giant scar on my calf like the guy went down I hit him up in your calf because when you hit him and you're like I'm done and then he pulls out a knife and just slices your calf that's how you get stabbed in your calf so even in your best fights you still get hit right in the process of trying to win and so but see again if someone's been on the mats before they've been in a ring before they've been in a fight before they realize like okay it's Gonna Hurt it's gonna hurt me even when I win right can I now try and talk my way out of this can I be cool if I have to I can always resort to that but can I be cool but if but if that Shifty desperate I'm the I'm the beta you're the alpha thing is the only tool I got I don't I don't want that dude I don't want that desperate thing because what if I'm with my family and you decide not to have mercy on me and I can't plead my way out of this I want to be able to like get both thumbs in your eye holes as quickly as possible right that's just a reality we all like you said it man we go in the elevator we start like sizing people up that's just how it is I don't know about you but I've got such a predator's mind that I'll be in an I'll be in a grocery store and I'll see like a woman with a purse and she's like looking at something I'm like I could steal that purse right now I see a guy who's like in his car and he's got his door opener but he's got his head in his ass is sticking out I'm like that Five series BMW could be mine right now like I know exactly what I would do to like pull him out of his car and take that car so quick like I do believe that every man has a predator's mind it's in our it's just a wayward wired but I also have experienced a lot of violence where I've had my ass whooped where I'm like that dude could also have a concealed carry permit as I'm pulling them whack that also that dude could also grab a knife and slice because I've been sliced before right and so and I would never do that these days right like the old me I've carjacked and home invasion robberies but the the new me like realizes that there's people that great might equalizer is the gun the knife or multiple people and if you get past all those then there's a universal uh karmic Justice that always has to take place to balance out you know you being an [ __ ] means your kid gets cancer interesting I believe in that too that my sins will be paid for by my kids and so I have to add so much value bro to make up for all those [ __ ] years of being an [ __ ] it's a useful way to look at it even if it's not literally true where can people follow you best place to follow me is on Instagram I love it guys follow him he's absolutely incredible he's right about an incredible amount of things and speaking of incredible things if you haven't already be sure to subscribe and until next time my friends be legendary take care peace I think there's a misnomer around like education and so a lot of them I don't know how explicit I can be but like they mentally masturbate so watching lots and lots of videos they you know want the pump up features they buy the tickets to the things and so they just learn and I think that they think that exposure to information is learning