Suhbah: Building Meaningful Friendships with Imam Bilal Ibn Yusuf

You came just to eat. They look at him hiding, running away. Not you, brother. The other guy outside. So, no, it it was to him. No, I'm just kidding. Um, I'm going to start off with something a little controversial, which is probably going to get the YouTube video demonetized and taken down way eventually when they upload the stream. I'm going to talk about Jeffrey Epstein. You guys ready? Today's a Kirkversary. You guys know that? Hey, come on, bro. They're live streaming this, man. It's not not a good look around him. Not a good guy wants to go to law school. He's out here clapping, bro. Okay. Um, so you guys saw that picture um where, you know, your boy Jup was like standing over a big piece of the kiswa. What is a kiswa, guys? Is Yeah. as is a covering that they put on top of the so um we're not going to get into the occult and esotericism of you know the practices of the chosenites maybe another lecture I'll do privately I'll tell you all about them and what they get up to but why um did he and why do people all over the world consider you know that piece of cloth to be so invaluable priceless I mean if you go if you go to to you know Arabia. I don't call it by its uh you know forced name. I don't believe in that name. If you go to the Arabian Peninsula today, um you can actually go to the museum where they make that cloth. You guys know that, right? Where they actually thread it and put it together and stuff and it's just it's just a cloth. So why is it that you know like mah masids when they want to fundraise they actually sell pieces of it, right? 5 in x 5 in goes for like $5,000. I don't know why. You know what the reason is? It's not some magical cloth. It's not like if you hold it your duas are accepted or something like that. No, people just want to hold on to it. Why? It's something called means association. Association. So I'll give you an example that you know allahel he talks about the book of Allah. Does Allah have a book? Yeah. Yes and no. Depend how we understand the word book. What about the house of Allah? Does Allah need a house? No. What about the spirit of the soul of Allah? What does that mean? All these things, this of Allah, that of Allah. It's called association that you associate one thing to another in order to raise that initial thing in its rank and its status and its honor. So why is thea considered so special? Allah calls it the ancient house of Allah. And every other masid that exists on earth is a subsidiary and a satellite masid of the original masid. Just like every single madrasa in the world is a satellite and subsidiary of the initial madrasa which is nei the first Islamic institution was the one established by the prophet sallallahu alaihi wasallam. So theiswah itself when it's placed on top of the Kaa we automatically associate you know this piece of cloth now with something special significant right sacred even though technically it's just a piece of cloth so like this this is a piece of cloth right here no one is going to be like oh my god I want this cloth because touched it right and if you do then you need some help right was connections khal center right mistan I can recommend you so many places so it's it's not that significant but automatically we associate value and virtue to that thing simply because of what it is associated with. Now you and I think to ourselves, right? Why is it that we hand out resumes and we say that I went to this university and I worked for this company and by the way here are my references and resources. We know like a million people in our lives but we are very particular who we write down as our references. Yes or no? And often times we leave off a lot of things from our CVs and our resumes. Why? Because what we write down on that piece of paper either brings us up in the eyes of HR or not or or lowers us, right? In the same way we we'll tend to do like a little thing. We we name drop in a conversations, right? You know, we're like, "Oh yeah, you know, I was just with Shikh Omar Sulman the other day. Oh shoot, Bid's hanging out Omar Solan, right?" Automatically that makes Bal somebody special, you know? He hangs out with a million people a day, bro. He doesn't know me. In the same way, all of us we do that, right? Why? Because what we associate with, we try to associate with things that will inshallah elevate us and raise us in reputation and in rank. Right? Now, I want you to keep that idea in mind because that's what we're talking about today. That's today's the first inshallah of a series of of lectures that will be happening at MCC called means companionship. It means the company that you keep. Now transitioning to a a principle in the Quran Allah says many many times throughout the Quran Allah tells us something and it has to be understood in context that you know if you were to tell me that you know when you fly make sure you don't hit any trees that's a that's a nonsensical statement it doesn't make sense because as far as I know I cannot fly so you're telling me to do something that is something impossible right so it's redundant you can't you should shouldn't say it doesn't make any sense so Allah tells us time and again don't be like these people don't be like these people don't be like these Don't be like these people. Now, if it was impossible for us to be like those kinds of people, he would not tell us don't be like those people. So, when he says don't be like the Yahood, that means that you and I have the capacity and the capability to be exactly like them, right? Don't be like the people who abused their prophet and took him as a joke, which is what the Yahood did with Musa Alam. So Allah is like, don't be like those people. And guess what? There are mus Muslims today who do that with our prophet sallallahu alaihi wasallam, right? They call it the Quranist movement. That's the kafir movement right there, guys. The disbelief. So in the same way the prophet sallallaihi wasallam also told us the same principle another example he says that don't be like he was poor and Allah made him rich now all you young professionals out here are like yo that's me right there in the trenches right now in going to make it out the hood one day right we're all trying to make it big so what do you mean this guy was poor and he got rich and he's saying don't be like him and the prophetam is telling us don't be like this guy that's all I'm striving to be like Zimbab Jam. You know his name is the son of the beautiful trying to be beautiful and rich. So what do you mean don't be like him? You have to understand his story. Im Jam was a impoverished man poor guy quite literally and he didn't have anything to do kind of jobless you know just wandering around looking for stuff to do had just enough to get by he comes to the prophet sallallahu alaihi wasallam one day and he's like messenger of Allah make dua to Allah that he makes me rich. How many of us make this dua on a daily basis? Don't be shy. Don't be shy. raise your hands. So's like, "No." He's like, "Messenger of Allah, make dua that Allah makes me rich." All says, "No, messenger of Allah, make dua that Allah makes me rich." Like, no, it won't be good for you. The man persists. He doesn't care. Now, imagine the prophet is telling you what's good for you and was bad for you, and you're like, I don't care. It already tells you what's in the guy's heart, right? You know, people are always like, "What do you want to do?" Instead of, "What do you want to do?" It's, "Is it good for you? What's good for you? What do you want to eat? Instead of what do you want to eat, but what should you eat? It's a better question. Where do you want to go? Rather, where should you go? Do we ever ask ourselves that question? Where should I go? What should I eat? What shouldn't I do? Instead of what do I want to do? Want want wants? Just giving it to our desires all the time. Our wants over our needs. The man wants to be rich. So, he tells the prophet, I want to be rich. Make dua that Allah makes me rich. He's like, okay, fine. That's what you want. Fine. He makes dua to Allahh. And Allah obviously accepts a dua of the prophet sallallahu alaihi wasallam and the man starts getting very very wealthy. It starts off small like a little trickle and you know the man he's living right there in the in the midst of Medina. So he was able to go to the masid five times a day go to the everything of the prophet sallallahu alaihi wasallam. Now when he has a little bit of money you know when you have a little money you invested in you have a little bit more. So he takes whatever little he works here and there and he gets a little bit of you know fewhams and din together and he buys some animals. Now he uses those animals. He sells their wool and he sells their milk and things like that. He's able to invest that makes a little bit more money. Invest it and buy some more animals. Now once you have a few, you're able to get more. So he's got multiple now. Now you can't live in the middle of the city with all these animals roaming around the Medina. You know, people are like, "Listen, man. You know, your animals are just going crazy. Take them out of the city." So he says, "Okay." So he takes his animals and he moves them just outside the like, you know, basically outside of like the crowded streets. Goes into the BBS, right? So he lives in suburbia Medina and he takes his animals over there and he settles down in that area and over there it's a little bit further away from the city the the masid and it's also now he's occupied he's very busy you know he's got to take care of all of his animals so he's not able to go five times a day you know to the masid he's not able to go for all the classes the tea and chai and stuff right so he can only go a few times a day he's able to go like three times a day he's still going to the masid and he's looking after his animals now once he's got a bunch of them and now he starts to have more animals animal. Takes that money, invested. Takes that money, invested. Now he's got a lot of animals. And people are like, "Listen, man. Your animals are encroaching on our territory and our property, right? They're coming over on our farms and stuff. Get him out of here. Okay, what do you guys suggest I do?" He's like, "Why don't you go move to the Awali? Go and move to the Ali." The Awali are basically the outskirts of Medina. So, you know, if you've been for you've been for you know, if you go to Medina, you will go to Masjid Kuba. Maj is an example. That's in the Awali. That's far away. It's outside of Medina, right? So, go over there several miles, couple miles outside of the city. He says, "Okay, fine." So, he picks up all of his belongings and he takes all of his animals and he settles down in a farm outside of Medina. Now, as he's over there in Medina, sorry, he's out there, you know, in the awar he's outside of Medina. Now, it's kind of far. He can't make it to the masid, you know, every single day for prayer. He's able to go for Jum basically. So, he's able to go, you know, they would carpool. Carpooling is mentioned in the Quran. Do you guys know that? I'm serious. Read is mentioned in the Quran. Read the you'll see. So they would actually carpool from you know caravan pool all the way from like and stuff to the inside of me. They go all the way to Majui and they would pray their prayer and then they would come back. Okay. So they would come all the way back. And so he's only able to go to Masjid Nui when once a week. So five daily prayers guy's able to go once a week. Now he's got even more money. He's got so many animals and so much property and wealth that basically increases just that small amount of animals to having two valleys worth of animals. Two valleys. Imagine, imagine if you have two valleys worth of cars for them. Let's take a car, right? Like a camel or something is like the equivalent of a car. So this guy's got so much now and people are like, "Listen, you know, you're taking up all the land, all the all the farmland, everything. You can't stay here." He said, "What do you suggest I do?" And they said that, "You know what? Several days journey away, there is this massive forest and you can go and settle there. Take all of your animals, go over there, and then you'll be rich and you'll be able to live comfortably." He's like, "Okay, great." So he takes everything and he moves moves multiple days journey couple weeks journey away and he settles down in this this area in Medina the prophet sallallahu alaihi wasallam gets the command from Allahhana of zakat the believers have to give zakat so you have to give zakat there's what 2.5% of what's left over after a year of holding you know your assets of the if you have over the okay so like go ahead and deliver this command to all the believers and including like anyone who's not currently in Medina so he would have to send out messengers and and emissaries to go and find people who are living far away. So this guy is living like he's deep you know in in somewhere in you know the desert. So he takes selects two of his go and find this person cuz one of my companions is living over there go and tell him that he has to give zakat on his money. They said okay. So they go and they drive drive get on their their camels and they go all the way out there until they eventually find this man knock on his door. The prophet sallallahu alaihi wasallam has received the command from Allahh that we have to give 2.5% of whatever is left over of our savings and has to be delivered to these eight categories of people prominently those who are in need the poor and the needy and you know the travelers. And the man's like okay so why are you here? Well m you have a lot of money a lot of animals so you have to give 2.5% on your savings and we have to give it to the poor. He said I don't have to give anything to the poor. This is my money. I worked hard for this. You know how what I had to do to build all of my assets up and do all you want me to give 2.5% of all of it away? No, I'm good. And he slams the door in their face. Now, a person who rejects one of the five pillars of Islam is not a Muslim. Left the fold of Islam. A person who rejects the direct command of the prophet sallallahu alaihi wasallam is also not a believer. Now, how that applies to us is a different story. when you're in the presence of the prophet sallallahu alaihi wasallam and he tells you to do something and you're like no that's disbelief because Allah says we have to obey the messenger sallallahu alaihi wasallam just like we have to obey Allah obey Allah and obey the messenger so this man's like no I'm good so obviously his faith is in doubt and looking back you know hindsight is 2020 we're like the guy's not a Muslim they go all the way back to Medina and Allah reveals an ayah to the prophet sallallahu alaihi wasallam he says that even if this man comes to deliver his zakat to the poor and the needy don't accept it from him. Now you're like, "Whoa, why? Why not?" Because the only reason that he would ever come back after this is because he's like, "Oh, what are people saying about me? Look, you know, what are people saying that I'm I'm a guy who doesn't give charity? I'm a stingy man. So I know I I got to boost my image in the eyes of people. My reputation is hurt and damaged." That's the only reason he would ever come back to give zakat. He's not going to come and give zakat. Watch the entirety of the life of the prophet passes. Eight years pass. The man never comes to Medina to give zakat. Doesn't come. Abu Bakr becomes a leaves dun and the man comes to meet Abu Bakr and he comes with bags and bags of gold and silver. He drops it at the feet of Abu Bakr. I've come to give my zakat for the past decade. Abu Bakr is like you didn't give it to the prophet when he asked him and you want to give it to me and I have to answer to Allah and his messenger. No, I'm good. You can take your zakat leave. So he leaves. Omar becomes a khalifa the next year. He comes back again two years later. So comes back to Alam drops all the gold and silver at his feet even more. I've come to deliver my zakat. Omar is like you didn't give it to Abu Bakr. Abu Bakr didn't take it from you. The prophet you know when he asked you to give it to him and you want me to be the guy responsible for you? No I'm good. Take it. Go get out. We don't want your money here. The guy leaves and he passes away during the time of many many of the scholars they mentioned this person who's afocus needs to be aware of the importance of the company you keep the importance of the environment ment that you are in when this man though he didn't have a lot of assets and resources though he was in a place where everybody was going to the masid I got to go to the masjid so many people are here so many people are here you guys could be anywhere Thursday night you and some of these guys I know you guys came from deep like bro you live out there and like where do you live bro Nevada you you know yeah so I lives like you know 354 minutes away from here right mash a lot of these guys here from like walnut creek a lot of my students and my friends are here and stuff guys coming from so far away coming with you know friends and what why I again like everyone's coming. I might as well come to the masjid. It's a program. I might as well go. This guy's so far away then it's like oh my god it's that far away. I have to caravan and pull with these guys. No, I'm good. I'm not going to the masid. Right. How many of us like you know when you're closer to the masid then it's easier to go. The further you are away then it's harder. Like ah I don't feel like it. The importance of what? Picking your neighbor over picking your house. Choose your neighbor before you choose your house. Choose your neighbor before you choose your house. Today we do the opposite. What do we do? We choose it. We look for the house, the perfect house. Find it on Zillow, right? Red fin, find it, get that house. And then we move in and then we discover who our neighbors are. And then we end up on a Netflix documentary, right? Because we didn't take, you know, two minutes to do due diligence of who is living around us, right? Famous story of the wife of she makes a dua to Allah right before her death. What does she say? Allah make a house for me in your neighborhood in Jenna with you in Jenna. Allah I want you to be my neighbor. She chooses her neighbor before she chooses Jenna. Imagine the importance of the company that we keep and we don't realize you know like you think that in order for you to be like someone you have to imitate them. No, it's enough to just be in the presence of those people to just be near them. The hadith of the prophet sallallahu alaihi wasallam which explicitly tells us he says that you know the example of a righteous companion a righteous companion and an evil companion a person that you sit with who is like a good person a person not so not so good is like the example of a musk seller a perfume seller and a blacksmith now seriously what happens if you if you just stand like you know just in the vicinity of somebody who is smoking you're not smoking but every single doctor on earth will tell you what that that is destructive and detrimental to your health. Even if you touch something that a smoker touched, that's called third-hand smoking. Even if you touch something that a smoker touched, then that's bad for you, right? So imagine the prophet was not just, you know, just speaking just for just for fun. He's warning each and every one of us that the environment, the people that you surround yourself with, that is who you eventually end up becoming. You will absorb those qualities and traits of people third hand if you have to, whether you like it or not, whether you're aware of it or you're not. During the time of the prophet sallallahu alaihi wasallam, it was a habit and custom of people that when they returned from a journey and because they were traveling through the desert. So coming back after like weeks and months is a big like bro the guy he passed the entire desert and didn't die. That's amazing. So he's going to come home. He's going to celebrate and he's going to invite all of his boys. So this man he comes back he he returns from his long journey. His name is M. He comes back and he invites all of like the leaders of his people. He invites them to come and have dinner or lunch at his house. So invites the prophet sallallahu alaihi wasallam to his home to come and eat amongst other people comes in and everyone sits down and they're about to eat and he's like please you know help yourselves like no I'm good now like this is you know that a man comes to your home and he left without eating you didn't feed that man it's your responsibility why didn't you accommodate him so Akbar's like this is going to hurt my honor my dignity my social credit it's going to take a hit so he's like no no no you have to eat what would you like is like and look at how persistent the prophet sallallahu alaihi wasallam with giving dawa to people even these like stubborn obstinate disbelievers like if you say if you sayham I will eat the man's like okay okay I accept I accept Allah and I accept his messenger like okay so then the prophet eats food obviously word immediately spreads that this guy who's like this huge enemy of Islam all of a sudden accepted Islam so it begins to spread like wildfire and people left and the next day goes to see one of his best friends his best friend's name is Obnf. He goes to see Oay and Oay like ignores him. He turns his cheek, doesn't want to talk to him. And Akbar's upset like what's going on? What happened, man? Left me on red. What's going on? And Oay's like, I heard that you have left the religion of our forefathers. Have you definitely left the religion of our forefathers? He's like, no, I have not. What are you talking about? He's like, no, everybody knows, man. Everybody knows. It was on your Instagram story, bro. We saw we saw who you were with, Muhammad sallallahu alaihi wasallam. We saw what you said that you took the shahada in front of everybody. He's like, "No, no, no, no, no. This man, he came to my house and he didn't eat when I told him to eat." And he said that only if you say this, I'm going to eat. So, I just said it just to make him happy. OB's like, "No, no, no, no. I don't believe you." You have to prove that you're not a Muslim. Prove to me you're not a Muslim. Okay, what do you want me to do? I'll do anything you ask. I mean, how many of us and people are like, "Oh, how do I advise my friends? How do I advise my friends?" Why do you always find yourself in the situation where you have to be the one advising people? I have students of mine, friends of mine that are coming to me, you know, man, you know, like how do I give my friend advice? How do I give? I'm like, bro, like you come and complain about your friends every other day. You have a different friend to complain about. Why are these your friends? No, seriously, why are these your friends? If you are the one finding yourself in every situation that you have to advise him, let's not do this, let's do that instead. What is wrong with you? Go find other people as friends. You are not obligated to be anybody's friend. Seriously guys, this is like there are certain things in life we have to realize. One of them is that you're not obligated to be anybody's friend. You should be friendly with people, friendly with everybody. Have a cheerful face, but don't be everybody's friend. So this man and how people are like, you know, they're afraid like if you cannot be yourself in front of these people, whoever they might be, your friends, your colleagues, your peers, then are those really the people that you want to be rubbing shoulders with? How much time do you want to spend around people not being your authentic true self? So this man is there obeys like I I refuse to accept that you're not a Muslim unless you do something. It's okay. What do you want me to do? I want you to go to Muhammad and I want you to spit on his face. And this man who would have never done that is like okay I'll do it. I'll do anything to be accepted back into the fold back into the ranks. I'll do anything to hang out with all of you guys all over again. Whatever it takes. So he goes and however he does so he sees the prophet sallallahu alaihi wasallam and he comes near the prophet and he spits on the face of the prophet sallallahu alaihi wasallam. Imagine imagine what's going to be waiting for this guy. Seriously even then his some things that a person does is some sins are so bad and so destructive that they feel the consequence of them in this life. One of them is disrespect to your parents. One of them if you disrespect your parents in this life you will feel the adab and the pain and the punishment of that. Allah protect us. Forget what's waiting in the hereafter. You feel the repercussions in this life. This man, he spits in the face of the prophet and a little bit of that spit, it ricochets. It falls back on him and it falls on his face and it scolds and it burns his face and it leaves like a burn mark on his face. That's like that's like a taste. It's like an idea of what's going to be waiting for you in the hereafter. This is what happened to you right now. This is from here on he would go on to become an even worse enemy of Islam. At one point he said the shahada he actually took like accept accepted Islam so to say at that point then he would be the person we've heard the famous story the prophet is praying in Mecca in front of and someone comes and they put the inards of a camel on his back where he's unable to lift himself up imagine right like a camel is a massive animal all of his intestinal organs and everything poured on the body of the prophet sallallahu alaihi wasallam unable to even lift himself up that was this is the man who did it and the man who who who instigated him led him to do it Obey that friend of his. Imagine like he could have been he could have been okay. He could have been saved if only he wasn't hanging out with these people. Who knows? You know the silliness of friends, the silliness of the company that we keep. There's a man during the time of the prophet. Um so there's a man you know he accepted Islam. The one guy he accepted Islam. You know why he accepted Islam? He's like I don't want to go to hell. That was the reason he's like I don't want to go to is I don't want to go to hell. So I'm going to accept Islam. So would do anything in his power to actually, you know, avoid um anyone becoming Muslim. And he was rich. He was like very wealthy. So he hears about this. He goes to the man. He's like, "Why? Why did you accept Islam? What's the deal, man?" I don't haven't you heard about the verses of of hellfire? I don't want to take the chance. I don't want to go to hell. He's like, "Okay, how about this? How about this? I will pay your ransom every single day. I will basically pay for you to avoid the hellfire. If I give a certain amount of money to you every day, can you avoid Islam? Can you stay with me? Yeah, sure. No problem. No problem. Give me x amount of money every day and I'll be a disbeliever. I I will basically I'll leave Islam for that long. So for like several days and several weeks would pay him. Basically, he would give an installment plan to remain a kafir to remain a disbeliever. And the man would take it. After a while, like yeah, forget this. I don't care. And he stops paying him. And guess what? The guy remains a disbeliever and he dies on disbelief. Imagine a person who has no principles and no morals that they're willing to sell out their their dunya and their for a few p poultry pennies. That's it. You guys know Alex Karp? I saw this picture today. You guys know Alex Karp? Y'all need to get educated, bro. Who knows Alex Karp? Go ahead. Raise your hands. There you go. Got some people. Anyone else? Okay. He's the the CEO of Palenteer, right? Um he's a he's a rabid, you know, um like Zionist and and you know pro genocide. There's a picture of him actually. You can see there's a picture of him wearing a kafa in the 1980s. Yeah. And today now he's openly on stage saying that yeah we're using you know uh as a as a testing ground for all of Palanteer's technologies. People are like yeah don't think that I can't be you. Don't think it can't be us. What do we think that these people are anomalies and they're different? No. He's a human being just like you and I are human beings. He was born to human parents right? He went to the same universities and colleges that you and I go to. Eats the same hopefully not the same exact same food as we do but in the same many of the same restaurants as we do. drinks the same water that we do here in California. Don't think that we cannot be like these people if we are not careful who we spend our time with, who we associate with. People say money corrupts us and that. No, it's the company that you keep, the people that you are with. That's why the prophet warned us. You know what he warned us against? He said a man, a person, a woman, an individual is upon the identical and same religion as their friend. He does not say their parents. He does not say their children. He doesn't say their boss. No. What does he say? Doesn't say they're a hero that they look up to. No, the friend that they keep. So he warns the Sahabah, be very careful who you take as a friend. The Sahabah needed to be careful. The Sahab, the prophet is telling them, you guys be careful who you keep as your friends. What about us? How much does that apply to us? Who are our friends? Who are the people that we are spending our time with? And we think that it's a small little thing. So small things have huge repercussions and consequences. There's a statement there's a story that um mentions in his and he he says that in this year in this year a man by the name of Abd he passed away he died may Allah disgrace this individual there's a person he was a Quran he was a scholar of the dean and he was a he go and fight in the path of Allah now you think like is making dua against it that may Allah disgrace and humiliate this person like dang what do you mean die, you know, as his legacy is that he passed away and this year may Allah disgrace him. This man Abad he was actually fighting jihad with the believers and they're in the land of the disbelievers. So in you know in the in the Roman territories Persian ter sorry outside the Persian the Roman ter the Byzantine territory and during that time you know like as the Quran he's like you know can you imagine right guys a complete package and one day they're you know they laid siege to a city they lay siege to the city and they see some of the inhabitants of the city and his eyes fall upon a woman who is a resident of the city a citizen and she's a disbeliever and he immediately becomes attracted to her immediately it's can't get her off of his mind. So, he finds a way to go and communicate with her. And he's like, "How can I get to you?" That's it. How can I have you? And you know what she says? You know what she says? She's like, "There's only one way that I want you to leave that camp and come back to come to this camp. Join us here." And so he's like, "Okay, if I do it, you'll accept me. You'll take me. You I can be yours." She's like, "Yeah, absolutely." So he leaves. He defects from the Muslims and he goes to fight with the disbelievers. He becomes a disbeliever. Imagine half of the Quran. Guy who used to pray, you know, fast every single Ramadan, did Hajj, did Omrah, memorize the entire Quran, scholar, mujah, fought in the path of Allah. The next day when they're fighting the battle, he's on the other side of the battlefield on the side of the disbelievers. The Muslims are here. this guy who was fighting with you brother in arms for years and they see him over there and they call out to him said oh Abda said where is your fasting today where is your hajj today where is yourra today where is you going to the masid every day today where is your salah today where is that of Quran you have the Quran memorized where is it today all of us got to ask ask ourselves that question we have all of these things we fasted x amount of months and we've done this we've done all these things great wonderful wonderful but the people that we we are there with how do we not know they will not cause us to slip Abua is there on the other side and they said you're half the Quran man if there's anyone who knows better it should there's no one who knows better than you what are you doing you know what his response is he's like this is just what's led me here they said that have you forgotten the entire Quran have you forgotten what Allah said in the Quran he's like actually I have forgotten I have forgotten that in one night Allah made me forget the entire Quran except one ayah when Allah says that the disbelievers the disbelievers will have intense desire and hope and regret that if only they could be Muslim. So that man is there. I forgot the entire Quran. And that that that disbelief that's in my heart right now that I have all all the only thing that is fighting against it is this one ayah said it's just constantly reminding me that I'm never going to overcome this disbelief. I'll never accept Islam. Imagine that regret that he has that story I mentioned about Allahel mentions him in the Quran indirectly and he says you know what's going to happen to this guy on the day of judgment. Allah says on the day of judgment the oppressive person the oppressor this guy but he's just he's the archetype that's just the individual and our scholars mention there will be millions of people like him on the day of judgment he will stand on the day of judgment and he will be filled with so much regret and remorse you know some people they have coping mechanisms so they do like interesting things right some of them will bite their fingernails yeah something like my students will know karim knows man don't don't do that in front of me right don't bite your fingernails in front of me so That's what he will do. People bite their fingernails on the day of judgment. And this man will be biting and he will go through his fingernail and then he will move on to his finger because the nail doesn't exist anymore. And he will chew off the flesh from his finger. And then he will keep on going till it gets to his hand. And then he will eat all of the meat from his hand until it's just bones. And then he will continue till he gets to his wrist and his forearm. And he will just be there out of such intense anxiety and remorse and regret because he's just sitting there waiting. He knows what's coming. He knows he's going to get exposed. And he sees somebody and that's the source of his regret and anger. And he will say, the man will speak up. If only I followed the prophet of God. If only, if only I didn't make that guy my friend. Guys, think about it for a moment. A man will cannibalize himself. A woman will cannibalize herself on the day of judgment. You know why? You know why? Because they regretted making that person their friend. That's unbelievable. The source of a person literally devouring their own flesh out of intense regret and remorse and anger is because of the company they kept in this life and in particular one person one person. Why did this person do that to me? That's what happened to the disbelievers. Even believers on the other hand, Allah mentions they'll walk into Jenna and they'll have gatherings. They'll have in Jenna. That's another thing by the way. can't enjoy Jenna unless you're with other people. You're going to be sitting back, you know, reclining with other people, hanging out with people. It's it's imagine how lonely, how how you know the joy of any success is only to be amplified when you're with people, when you have somebody you can share your joy with. When something when you have good news, you got the job, you you passed the interview, you got into the school you wanted, you have so many people you want to share the news with. It only makes you happier when you see their happiness. Imagine you have the best news in the world and you have nobody to share it with. Imagine you have the worst news. You've just been devastated with some extremely painful news and you have nobody there to help you shoulder that burden. Nobody there. It's like, "No, it's all it's all good, man. Don't worry. We'll get through it and surely you'll be fine." And you come home and it's a dark empty apartment, dark empty house. Then what? I I know people I'm not kidding. Like I know people that are billionaires. I'm not legitimately. And I know people, you know, and and that person would do anything. They would give their entire treasure and their wealth away just to have a happy, stable family life. Seriously, think of the blessings we have, guys. The people of Jenna, they walk into Jenna and when they're having these gatherings and they're seeing everybody, you know, and they're hanging out with people, then one of the guys, one of the sisters, she's going to be looking around. Where is that friend of mine? Allah, they're going to, you know, interact with one another and they'll start asking questions. How was this? How is this? How is how's all these people? How is this and that? And then one of them will say, one of them is going to speak up. I used to have a very very close friend. They call them a Muslim friend. Someone who I was very close to. I don't see that friend here. To compare. Like my parents used to be like, "Why can't you be more like him? Be more like her." Like that's how close we were. I don't see that friend here. I'm looking. I don't see him. Where is he? The only way that I remember him today is that he used to be the one always challenging me. You guys seen those memes where it's like, you know, someone tells, you know, someone doesn't believe you and then you Google it and you turn out to be right, you know, and you look at them like, see, so he used to always tell me like, "You really believe all this stuff? Are you serious? Come on, really? For real? Get real. We die. We turn into dust and bones and dirt and nothing. And then we will be brought back and we will be questioned about it. Seriously, are you for real? I don't know about all that. And he's like, "Do you guys know what happened to my friend?" And the angels will come forward, the Torah guides of Jenna, and they will say, "You come, come, come." And they'll have him stand right there. And they will tell him, "Look down." And the floor of Jenna at that moment will be made into a window. And he will look down through this window. He will look down and he will see into the depths of the hellfire. and he will see that friend of his, the one that his parents used to say, why can't you be more like him? Why can't you be more like her? People used to mistake the two of them. They thought they were brothers and sisters. That's how close they were. And he will see that friend in the depths of the hellfire. And you know what he will say? I swear by Allah. So there's three ways of doing in obvious ways. So there are higher levels. Don't go around home from now on saying everything. Okay guys, don't do that. Right? So the highest level I swear by Allah you are this close to making me slip. I was about to follow your footsteps and it's only Allah's blessing the shield that he created around me that I am not from the inhabitants of the hellfire today. That's it. This Jenna that we have this is the greatest victory. Nothing can be better than this. So for this, let those who strive and work hard compete for this. What's amazing is that this is I mean time is a very interesting concept. One day in I'll give a lecture on it, okay? To the best of my ability, how is understood in the Quran. Okay? This is a story in the future. It's going to happen in Jenna. Jenna operates outside of time. It's a story in the future. Number one. Okay? Hasn't happened yet. Number two, Allahh uses the past tense to talk about that story to denote something called in Arabic, this means to denote absolute certainty. It's as if it's already happened. So it's a future event that is described in the past tense. Okay? So it's it's already happened. But the man who is speaking is saying that this is the greatest victory. The man in the future is saying this is the greatest victory. Let those who strive and work hard work for this. What's incredible is that guess what? All the working is done. You're already in Jenna. So this is a man in the future talking to you and I in the past today in the Quran. Isn't that incredible? Telling all of us guys this is the real victory. I'm telling you I had friends like this. My friends are in hellfire. Don't be like them and be like us who actually ended up in Jenna. So this is a message in the Quran from the future for you and I. The Quran is in the past and that it was revealed to us chronologically in the past. However, it's sharing a story of a man from the future relaying a message to us in the past so that we are not people of regret in the future. Listen to that again on YouTube so you're able to catch. Okay. So, so yeah, final parting advice is that you know our friends should not always be those who make us feel good. They should be those people who make us better people. That's it. Don't always try to surround yourself people just make you feel good. Make you feel better. Forget about feeling better. What about being better? May Allah give us good companions in this life and unite us with the best companions in the hereafter. We'll open the floor for any questions. Does anybody have any questions? Obviously, that was a beautiful talk about friendship. >> Um, I had a couple questions. The first one was um in like today's world especially living in the west you know you could find um couple or several flaws from like our friends and our peers and like classes whatnot. I wanted to know how would you strike a healthy balance of still trying to give nasi to your friends because um you don't want to be completely isolated by just leaving every friend due to whatever small mistake you see of them and knowing when to actually leave your friends um you know if it's compromising your dean. >> Yeah that's a good question. So u um I would say like one very simple litmus test is um well two right um one is if you are trying to have them leave like major sins then I I would very much discourage you know that I'm not saying that you shouldn't advise them no you should advise them saying don't advise them advise them but be very careful in how much time you spend with those people right major sins uh there's many reasons behind that but that's for another time inshallah if it's minor sins you know your friends are doing like some things they shouldn't be doing but we also do things we shouldn't be doing right that's a different story. You can still be friends with them. You can still like spend time with them so long as you're not engaged in major major sins, right? Um cuz the m the minor sins that if you just come to the masid and you pray salah together, all your minor sins are erased anyways, you know? But major sins are a different story. So number one is that yeah, if you find yourself you have friends, companions who are engaged in like severe severe sins, I would really recommend, you know, reconsidering that friendship. Yeah. And the last question is um when you're like uh in school trying to get a degree or let's say you're at your internship um a lot of my non-Muslim peers would say this like you got to network a lot you got to be in certain environments with like this supervisor this manager and XYZ etc etc so you can keep in contact keep in touch and they could help you like you said with the references and whatnot to advance um your career or whatever it is that you're trying to accomplish. I want was wondering what practical boundaries can we set to keep safeguard our faith while still trying to advance in this prof high level professional corporate world without trying to compromise our dean. >> Yeah that that's also a really good question. So again you know I would recommend you know observing the ayat of Quran and the hadith of the prophet sallallahu alaihi wasallam that already you know automatically set boundaries for us and they already tell us for example there's hadith of the prophetam where he warns against spending you know time uh in the company of people who are you know drinking alcohol. So basically that even a a a gathering where alcohol where alcohol is being spread around. So if you're sitting at like this massive you know banquet table and like you know your co-workers your colleagues are ordering whatever it is like oh it's happy hour you have to network. No that is something that is cursed according to the hadith of the prophet sallallahu alaihi wasallam. So that's something you just straight up you avoid. Oh but networking that's fine. I don't need to network with these people. I'm okay. You know I'm fine with this position. I'm fine with a lower pay if if I have to rub shoulders with these kinds of people to get ahead. Guys, if you really want to get ahead, you can forsake all of your principles, you know, forsake all of them and you can be very far in life, right? It's not that hard. Um, so we we follow the principles that are set, you know, for us by Allah and his messenger sallallahu alaihi wasallam. So, this is just one example. I would recommend, you know, going, you know, with a fine tooth comb through the Quran and through the statements of our prophet to see like who are the people that I and what venues and locations should I avoid? A statement of the prophet. Stay away from places where you can be accused. Stay away from places you can be accused. So, I mean, technically, there's nothing wrong with going into a liquor store. Technically, there isn't. It's just a store and they're selling things that not every single thing in there is, you know, haram. You can get like a maybe like, you know, I don't know what else you can get. I've never been in one, but like maybe you can get some, you know, like um gum or something, right? So, technically you can go in there, but if somebody sees your boy Mad walking out, yo, you know where I just saw man's right now? you know, I saw him walking out of whatever these one of these places are. So stay away from anywhere where a person can point at you be like, what were you doing there? Seriously, it's a bad look. So that's again, that's just another principle. There's many of these kinds of principles. So I would recommend finding them and exercising them in. >> Anyone else? >> Yo, you look exactly like my cousin, bro. It's been throwing me off the entire time. I swear to God. >> That's so funny. You made eye contact with me a couple times. I'm like I don't know the brother. He looks like he knows me. >> I know. I'm like I'm like I'm like Ma, what are you doing here, man? Like >> you live in Canada, you know? What do you you have a baby? Go to your baby. Like why are you here? >> No, not me, man. Not me. Lazair, nice to meet you. Thank you for being here, man. >> Um >> so my question is a little bit related to the other brothers. Um we often do find ourselves in life with uh with friends or people we're associated with who are in different stages in their journey with Islam and journeys with Islam even personally they come in and out. They're a curved path for many of us. These journeys take a long time and guidance ultimately comes from Allah. >> Yeah. So, how do we strike a balance between being a long-term gentle presence in an attempt to draw someone closer to Islam? H how do we how do we engage in that sort of long-term thinking while also guarding ourselves from potential long-term slippage? M >> yeah it's a really good question mah cuz you don't want to abandon like childhood friends you know and especially like you know and people are sometimes people are just so harsh with other people like all of us like me when I start like I wasn't born with a beard I always tell people right like up until I was as majority of your guys' age right like you know you're always on something else so but alhamdulillah you know and then after like I was like very zealous I was like hardcore kafir kafir kafir you know what I mean I'm like shoot I'm surrounded by kufur you know like um but alhamdulillah like I I toned it down after you know it took some time. So, one thing to help us, you know, inshallah like be more easygoing with people is that this is how you used to be. Just a couple of days ago, Allah favored you and today now, mashallah, you're able to pray. You know, today you you're demanding that, you know, this person wears, you know, this and that, dresses like this and comes to the masid 17 times a day, you know, but mah you didn't even know how to make wudoo until two weeks ago, right? So all of these like keyboard warriors these will be attacking me and like you know bro like your sheh is sheh PDF don't come for me bro like seriously like that's another thing that's the second step is that you spend time with good company like scholars in particular for yourself your personal self is that you should spend time in the the not me but like actual like and stuff we have tame go out to mash huda you know that's my number one recommendation go to masjid huda once a week spend time with shik tamim he has many durus and classes go and just sit in his classes surrounded in that company in the masid for your personal thing. Don't hit up your guys like, "Yo, guys, you want to go to Union City so we can go to the masjid and sit in the class and then go out to eat." No. Then your intention is for every other reason for yourself personally. I'm going to go to I need it for myself. So your personal and worship, stay on top of that. If a person, if you and I are going out giving dawa to people, to people, but we are not making dua for that person, especially into we not making dua for them after salah. We don't really care. We're giving and advice from our ego. That's it. because it feels good to tell him, "Brother, we can't be doing all this." Duh. He knows that. Okay. So, your own personal and worship, stay on top of that. Stay in this in the company of righteous people, scholars in particular, people of knowledge. Number two, number three, constantly remind yourself that where were you just recently, just a month ago, just a year ago. Where were you? It took you forever. It took you forever, sister. It took you forever to start wearing hijab. You didn't wear hijab until you're 21. And now you want someone to start wearing tomorrow. Like, come on. Get real. All of us. Where were where were we recently and where are we today? Alhamdulillah. And in the same way that is such a scary ayah man you know what that means that if we wanted and we desired we can take away whatever we have revealed to you. I shared the story of that guy with you right half of the Quran mujah and everything. Allah took the entire Quran away from his heart and he forgot everything. So if we are looking down on other people because we have slightly made a little bit of progress in our journey, how do we not know that Allah will not erase all the progress we have made, all the gains that we have made. So be very very mindful of that. Constantly remind ourselves. Finally, you know this idea of meeting people where they are. I I'm on board with that. I agree with that. However, if you have what do you do when you meet somebody where they are? You don't sit down with them and have tea with them. You take them by the hand inshallah and you lead them further down the path. You guys should be able to go further. If you look back at your friendship with somebody, two years you guys have been boys. And guess what? The guy is still doing all the exact same sins and you have not progressed in your memorization of Quran, you have not progressed in coming more to the masid, then that friendship has borne zero fruit for you, has given you nothing. So all of us, I'm meeting them where they are. Great. Where are you now after a year of your friendship, five years of your friendship? So we have to be able to gauge and and keep track of these things inshallah. Um, I have a well two questions regarding a main idea that you said earlier on a little bit later in your talk. Um, so you said that the best sort of friendships, if I've understood correctly, are those that uplift both of you guys, where you two work to make each other stronger, whereas some of the worst types of friendships is where you're just trying to make the other person feel better, uh, you know, regardless of what they're doing. >> So from that sort of principle, I have two sort of questions that arise. So if I am to pick a friend that is better than me at something, well just better than me at anything in general, what is stopping me from thinking that that friend himself can just look at me and say, "Oh, this guy has nothing nothing on me. I should go look for a better person than him." And then it's just like a constant cycle where you're just looking for better people your entire life. And then the second thing that arises from that is what's stopping me from feeling a sort of pride in my own self where it's like oh I can't be friends with this person because oh he's poor, he's broke, he doesn't got it up like me or you know just whatever it is. Uh >> I'm sorry. Can you repeat that one more time? I I zoned out. Sorry. One more time. >> No, it's okay. Um, so this the second thing after that last part was um what's stopping me from thinking, oh like I shouldn't be friends with this guy because I'm better than him in some way. And then ego and pride all of that starts to develop >> from those sort of principles once I'm looking for someone that's >> you know better than me and then >> inadvertently that actually creates pride and ego. >> Yeah, that's a that's a good question, you know. Um so sorry for zoning out, right? It happens sometimes. No, you're good. I'm a human being. So, you know, the reason like the thing is that, you know, you're not like um looking for for people in the sense of like, okay, this person is going to I'm going to get something out of him, right? Like that's not how we should approach our relationships and our, you know, uh companions and friends, you know? Um instead it's that a person in in their exercising their dean in you know finding better friends finding better companions and encouraging them to come to the masid that person you if you're inviting other people to the masid you're doing it not for them you're doing it for yourself whenever you and I give to people whenever we give dawa to people whenever we talk about doing whenever we say guys let's go to the masid never think that these guys need to go to the masid I'm going to take them to the masid rather you think to yourself like guys let's go to the masid I need to go and if my friends don't go I'm too weak I'm not going to end up going I'm going to be like nobody's going forget I'm not going to go look at yourself in that context not like oh these guys need to go yo let's go man no no no no no rather I need to convince them to go because I need to go more than anybody and if they benefit great you know so now what other people do is not up to us so if it's like oh well what if you know I go and I want to spend time with people who are better than me and you know they're going to turn their nose up at me it inshallah it won't happen right the people who have you progress further in their spiritual journey and their path to Allah subhanaa tala are not the people that are going to turn their nose up at us and be like oh you want to come to my majus and hang out with my friends no no no you're not elite enough you can't come here no and if they are the kind of people have that mentality and mindset they're the furthest people that you should be you should be far away from them last people that you want to spend time with right so yeah it is about self-rectification but always do it for yourself any advice any anything like that that's why the company we avoid is not because we don't trust them don't say I'm not going to hang out Sorry bro, I can't I can't hang out with you guys Friday night. It's not because you don't trust that person. It's because you don't trust their shaitan. Every one of us isan with us and you don't trustan himself that he's not going to, you know, cause something to happen with the two of you guys and all of you guys going out somewhere. It's very easy, you know, foran to pull his tricks. So it's not because, oh, I look down on that person, he does this, therefore I'm not going to. No, no, no. It's myself. These guys, they they they do silly things. If I'm with them, I'm going to do 10 times sillier things. So I'm not going to. Right? is about looking at ourselves more critically than it is about other people. Yeah. >> So, would you then say that friendship is actually a a selfish endeavor? >> I mean, naturally, human beings are, you know, social creatures. Yeah. Undoubtedly does. Just because it's selfish doesn't mean it's a bad thing. >> I agree. >> Thanks, man. Appreciate the stamp of approval. >> I think we have time for one more questions. Anyone on the sister side? We can take one more brother then. >> So the best of your friends are those in which you're able to go and you know get from inshallah. Where's the balance in asking for while also protecting uh yourself from revealing your sins as well as also protecting the honor the honor of others in terms of like and yourself in terms of backbiting and whatnot? >> Yeah, it's a good question. So um you know we should not reveal our sins and our mistakes and our bad habits to our friends. Just don't very simple. The only time that you know we should perhaps open up a little bit is to uh let's say wiser more righteous inshallah more pious people um in the hopes that they will be able to advise us and guide us to hopefully leaving that sin or to you know get over the the maybe the trauma or the regret and guilt that we have over that sin. That's the only time that you should be opening up about your sins. The prophet of Allah told us that Allah will forgive everyone for my ummah. He said except some of the worst of people. So who are those people? That a person that Allah covered them at night and the next morning he gets up and he brags about what he did the previous day. Allah put a sat Allah put his hijab on that person and then he goes and he boasts and he brags about the sins that he went and committed. So those are the people Allah will not forgive. Why will Allah not forgive? Allah is the most forgiving. It's because that person will not ask Allah for forgiveness because they're open with their sins. They don't consider they don't they don't care. They have no shame in front of Allah. They have no shame in front of people because they're bragging and boasting about the kind of vices that they got up to just yesterday. So they will never ask Allah for forgiveness. Therefore, they're not going to get that forgiveness. So we don't want to fall accidentally into such a category that especially when you talk about sins with friends. Let's just say, you know, um past times that we have with our friends, we might mention something here and there and we'll just laugh it off. We'll just joke about it, you know, but we might have just accidentally trivialized a sin because when we are with certain close companions, we don't take a lot of things seriously and sins are something to be taken seriously. bad habits or something to be taken seriously. So my advice is to not bring up you know those kinds of things about ourselves in certain company. Um if you're going to then do so in a very restricted and limited capacity and only do so with as I told you people who are righteous inshallah wiser elderly people inshallah you know elderly is older than you inshallah people who have the wisdom and the knowledge and the experience to be able to guide you in that respect. Yeah. So just don't talk about those things. Um and then there's an amazing hadith and we'll end with this hadith inshallah that the prophet sallallahu alaihi wasallam you know he gave his but like some amazing advice and I'll tell you guys all of this too right that a person if you know about the sins of a person you know about the mistakes of not something that they're harming other people but just a personal individual sin habit bad habit that that person has and you know about it and you have the ability and the power to expose it and to spread it amongst the people even if it's just to one other person just to pass it you know in passing you say something over you know coffee at comedy or something right instead of doing that instead of actually sharing some very very privileged and private information you have about that person you keep it to yourself and you don't share that person's you know sin to other people the reward of that person is like you know what is like the person who during the time of Jah before Islam that they would go to the grave of a recently buried young girl and they rescue her and they save that girl before she suffocates under the ground isn't that crazy because that's a habit it's mentioned in the Quran. Allah mentions that she will be asked right so is a girl a girl who was just born hours ago hours ago and then she's put into the dirt to be suffocated to death. Allah protect us. What a horrible crime, right? And imagine a per imagine you're that person and you hear about somebody they just did that to their daughter their infant daughter and you run you sprint and you dig it out of the ground and you dig that child out of the ground and then you you are able to save that that child's life can you imagine your rank and the status in the eyes of Allahh if you were to do something like that in the status of humanity if you do something like that and people knew about that you get the same reward if you do what you know about something that a person is struggling with dealing with a sin of theirs and instead of spreading it to the world you keep it to yourself it's It's between that person and Allah. May Allah make us sincere people and surround us with sincere people. Alhamdulillah everyone. Thank you for coming. Inshallah. Next month we'll also have another one of the events. Uh we're going to have brother Moyes Mo do the program inshallah. I'm sure it's going to be very very very nice. He's currently playing basketball instead of coming to my talk. So you know that what great friend he is, right? I'm gonna have I'm going to make him watch this video of mine. So all right everybody.