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Should You Rush Marriage Because You’re Living Together?

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The video addresses a complex situation where two individuals who were living together prior to converting to Christianity are now both believers and planning to get married soon. The central question raised is whether continuing to cohabit until the wedding date constitutes living in sin, even if they have stopped engaging in sexual immorality. The speaker argues that simply stopping physical acts of fornication does not automatically resolve the spiritual issue, as the arrangement still creates a situation where God's honor and the sanctity of the marriage covenant are compromised while waiting. The core argument presented is that believers must avoid even the appearance of sin and should not make provisions for the flesh by remaining under one roof without being married. The speaker emphasizes that staying in the same house, sharing bedrooms, or merely sleeping in different rooms within the same dwelling does not constitute true separation; it only delays the inevitable temptation. Consequently, those who are not yet married but plan to wed soon face a clear binary choice: they must either get married immediately to honor God and their commitment to one another, or they must separate physically by moving out until the wedding takes place. To illustrate this point, the speaker references a pastor named Philip Anthony who attempted to solve the issue by sleeping on a couch while remaining in the same home. The video firmly rejects this approach as insufficient, stating that unless there is a completely separate living space with a locked door, such arrangements do not honor God or protect the couple from temptation. The underlying principle is that a believer's will and desires should be subordinate to God's standards, and allowing a partner to remain in a situation that could lead to sin is tantamount to wanting God to honor one's own sin rather than seeking His glory. Ultimately, the conclusion is decisive: there is no middle ground or prolonged waiting period for couples who are already living together before marriage. If the goal is to walk in holiness and avoid stumbling blocks, the couple must act immediately by either tying the knot today or separating their residences until the wedding occurs. The speaker urges young believers to do the right thing without hesitation, asserting that true honor for God requires removing any opportunity for compromise, ensuring that both partners are treated with dignity and protected from spiritual danger before they can fully unite in marriage.
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for let's say like individuals who might Okay, like let's say for an example, right? Let's say you have a guy and a girl. They were together, living together prior, whatever is the case is, and during their during their time of them living together, they both have came to Christ, and they both made a decision to Okay, we're going to get married ultimately to not be living in you know, like sin. Stop fornicating, and you know, like stop fornicating for the most part, you know, like stop committing sexual immorality, and have plans on getting married. Would you still consider that as still living in sin? Cuz I heard a I heard a lot of people or not a lot of people, but I hear like people say, "Oh, yeah, it's still sin. Like it's a stumbling block." Or whatever the case may be, but I mean like your take on it, like I I know the Bible says that a man is to leave his mother and father and be joined to the wife, but if two people were already living together prior to them coming to the faith, it's like how does one go about that when they're both willing to you know, like uh you know, like be under that oneness under God? >> Hold on. Ask the question again. Two people that are living together. >> Right. >> Um they weren't married. They come to Christ. >> And they both like plan on getting married. >> Mhm. >> Like as soon as possible, like not really prolonging it as in like oh, well, let's wait another 2 years or whatever else the case is, but you know, like as soon as as soon as possible, they're going to tie the knot. >> Mhm. So, should they Are you asking should they do it? >> Well, no, not should they do it, but in a sense it's like until that time frame comes. Like let's say they already have like a set out date. Like a month or two. >> So, it So, so uh Earl and Mary are living together. They want They They become believers, and they want to get married, but they're not getting married till December. Right. Okay, so what what I you asking what should they do then? >> Well, Yeah, in a sense. Like, you know, like is it still like since they are since they already been living together and they already are planning to get married like in December as you put it. >> We got two choices. >> You know, like is it Okay. >> They have two choices. One, stop living together until you get married or go get married today. If you want to have a ceremony in in December, fine. But you got two choices. Get married today or separate until you get married. That's it. E- either you're going to honor God or you're going to make honor or you or you're going to want God to Either you're going to honor God or you want God to honor your sin. Right? >> Right. So, even if Right. So, even if So, even if sexual immorality is out of the picture, right? Like no fornication is taking place and none of that. It's still It's still either separate and leave or or like I get married tomorrow in a sense. >> So, so even if they stop having sex um should what should they do? Do not avoid the very appearance of sin. And Paul says don't make no provision for the flesh. So, here we are, we're in the same house. Um she's going to wear what she's going to wear. I'm going to wear what I'm going to wear and we're going to act like we got We all of a sudden all of a sudden now we have self-control. No. Either again, are you going to honor God or do you want God to honor your sin? >> Right. >> So, if you don't want to get another place then, you know what? Go get married today. Go get married today. And then have you have your ceremony in December or whenever you're going to do it. But we're we're not we're not going to Shall I join the Holy Spirit to a harlot? And do I want to make her into a harlot? No. So, your honor for God should cause you to honor her as well. I don't want her to be treated this way, not even by me. My desires and my will should not go before the Lord or before how I should see her. And I want others to see her. Amen. Right. Okay. Now, are you Earl in this thing? Are you Earl? >> Yeah. Yeah, my name Earl. >> All [laughter] right. Okay, cool. So, listen. So, so, so, young brother, do the right thing. Do the right thing. You either getting married today >> Yeah. >> or uh separate until then. Go Either you go stay with your parents or she go stay with her parents or or something. Amen. >> Yeah, uh cuz I was hearing um you know, like not to really bring any any other pastors or whatever else the case is into this conversation, but I was hearing a sermon from uh Philip Anthony and um he was basically saying that, you know, like he was kind of like in like the same boat in a way with, you know, like his wife and then he ended up sleeping on the couch for the time being. I know it's still under the same roof, like you said, make no provisions for the flesh, as Paul says, um but, you know, like he was like that he kind of like separated himself from the bedroom, you know, like he was >> That ain't That ain't separating yourself. Listen, unless she got a a a separate interest to the bedroom and a lock on that door, that ain't doing nothing. That's not No. No, no. So, rather than burn, get married, as Paul says. Uh because I'm sorry, her being in a different room is not going to cause me to not want to be with that person sexually. So, again, I'm not And I'm not equivocating on this. You got two choices. Get married now or separate now. That's it. Amen. >> Yeah. Yeah, I hear you. Thank you, Corey. >> All right, brother. You take care.