Video summary
The video addresses a sensitive and complex question regarding marriage and divorce through the perspective of a viewer named Nikki, who has been married five times to the same man, with periods of separation due to his incarceration. Currently single, Nikki seeks clarification on whether she must remain unmarried until her first husband passes away or if biblical scripture mandates reconciliation with him as the only option for remarriage. The host explains that while 1 Corinthians chapter 7 suggests a wife should either remain unmarried or be reconciled to her husband after divorce, this instruction is rooted in the principle of prioritizing God above all else. The core argument presented is that before seeking fulfillment in any human relationship, an individual must first find their heart filled by God, making Him their primary love rather than looking for completion in another person.
To illustrate this point, the host draws a parallel to the story of the woman at the well from the Gospel of John, highlighting how Jesus corrected her understanding of her marital status not just factually but emphatically. By analyzing the Greek word order, the host emphasizes that Jesus focused on the husband she did not have while implying that her current partner was not her lawful spouse, effectively shifting her focus away from human relationships and toward Him. This narrative serves to reinforce the idea that the desire for a relationship is natural, but true comfort and fulfillment can only be found in God first. The host argues that if one tries to fill life's voids with anything other than Jesus, it will result in disappointment, likening it to pouring water into a bucket full of holes; therefore, the question of "who to marry" must remain secondary to the primary pursuit of a relationship with Christ.
Although the biblical standard dictates that a divorced person should ideally reconcile with their first husband or remain single, the host offers a nuanced perspective on grace and consequences for those who have remarried outside these parameters. He clarifies that while such actions may constitute disobedience and carry consequences, they do not result in perpetual sin or disqualify a person from God's love. The discussion underscores that God does not hold a grudge against individuals for past mistakes but desires to model His marriage to humanity through the example of Christ and the Church. Consequently, the host encourages Nikki and others to prove their faith by living a life where Christ is the center, ensuring that any future decisions are made from a place of spiritual satisfaction rather than a desperate need for human validation or emotional filling.
Ultimately, the conversation concludes with a strong exhortation for Nikki to make herself the "true bride of Christ" and to pursue a deep, personal relationship with God regardless of her marital history. The host reassures her that she is not looking for an excuse but rather seeking the right path, affirming that her desire to be right with God is commendable. He advises that if she can find true satisfaction in Him, whatever future holds will be manageable and blessed, whereas seeking fulfillment outside of Christ will likely lead to repeated relational struggles. The video ends with a message of encouragement, reminding viewers that while biblical principles provide a clear framework for marriage, the ultimate goal is to worship God in spirit and truth, making Him the sole focus of one's life and love.
Read the full video transcript
All righty, Nikki. How are you doing,
sister?
>> I'm doing great, thanks, Corey. I
appreciate your show. I've watched you
forever, but never mentioned um
>> Did I talk to you before?
>> No,
>> I didn't. Okay. Okay.
>> So, I have a question and part of it um
is a little embarrassing for me, but I
really want to know. So, I've been um
I'm I'm thinking about uh 1 Corinthians
chapter 7, I believe.
>> Um
>> where it says that the wife should if
there's a divorce, the wife remains
unmarried or gets reconciled with the
husband.
>> Mhm.
>> Okay. The the embarrassing part for me
is that I've been married five times.
>> Okay.
>> Um my first husband and my last husband
were the same person.
>> Okay.
>> Um but in between he was in prison, blah
blah blah. But um so my question is I'm
I'm single now. I'm I'm single now and
should I remain unmarried until my first
husband
passes away or should I be reconciled to
him? Is that what the Bible says? Cuz
just feels like everybody skips over
that passage.
>> Okay. Can I be honest with you?
>> Yeah.
>> Okay.
You should remain as you are right now.
Um, you should make your focus be God.
>> Do not look for anything in any other
man. Look for everything in him.
Because, and I understand when people
get married, when people want to be with
somebody, they're they're trying to
fulfill something in them. But before
you can fulfill anything in you, you
need to you need to let God fill your
heart up.
>> Let that be let him be your first love.
It can't be Earl, Bob, Troy, or whoever
else. No matter how alone or lonely you
might feel, the reason why a person can
feel alone or lonely is because they
don't recognize who is actually still
there with him. We've it's easy to
forget that God is there when my focus
is on somebody else. Okay. Now, does
that mean that no matter that you can
get close to him and the desire to be
with someone is going to go away? No.
No. Um, but you're going to have to find
your comfort in him first.
You're at a point because that who who
should this remind us of? It should I
don't know you've heard this before. I'm
pretty sure you have, right? Who Who am
I talking about?
>> The woman at the well.
>> The woman at the well. And what's
interesting is how Jesus spoke to Let's
go there.
>> Something that Jesus said there that is
actually pretty cool. I think it's verse
is it one of these verses? Um,
there it is. Verse 18. No, verse 17.
She said, the woman said, I have no
husband. Jesus said to her correctly,
you have stated that I have no husband,
for you have had five husbands, and the
one whom you have now is not your
husband. But notice how Jesus kind of
switches what she says. She says in
verse 17, I have no husband. Here's the
Greek. The woman said uk e echoandra.
Let me highlight that. Uk echo andra.
Our English says Jesus says you are
correct when you said I have no husband.
But that's not how he says it to her. He
didn't say uk echo andra. He said andra
uke echo. Now by the way in Greek means
the same thing. It literally means the
same thing. So why are you making a a
point about the the word order? Because
Jesus is letting her know that a husband
you don't have. He's putting emphasis on
the husband. What is Jesus trying to get
her to focus on? Yours truly, not me,
but him. Me,
>> a husband you don't have. I mean that
you don't have for five. Husband you
have had. And now the one who you're
with is not your and by the way the word
that that that he puts here is man or
anair. He could be saying same thing as
a husband. Um he says this is the truth.
He says uh no he says you have truly
spoken
even though
she was a little bit embarrassed about
it. Okay fine. But notice what he didn't
do. He didn't say you know what I'm
through with you out. Nope. She's She
says, "I think you are a prophet.
Our fathers worship on this mountain."
And Jesus says, first of all, you got it
wrong. But what does she finally say?
She says, um, woman, believe me, an I'm
sorry, I should have on the screen.
Believe me, an hour is coming when
neither on this mountain nor in
Jerusalem will you worship the Father.
You worship what you do not know. We
worship what we know for salvation from
the Jews. Look what he says. But an hour
is coming when the true worshippers will
worship the father. Well, let me ask you
a question. Um, when is that when is
that hour coming?
>> Now.
>> Now. Cool. So, right now. And then, so,
so now that now is a time he says, "For
such the people of God seek to be his
worshippers." Um, God is spirit and
those who worship him must worship him
in spirit and truth. So the time for
Nikki is now to worship him in spirit
and in truth. And so he says, the woman
said, "I know that Messiah is coming. He
who is called Christ. When the one
comes, he will declare all things."
Jesus says, "Young lady." He says, "Ego,
uhoh." He says, "Ego." He says, "The one
you're speaking to, I am he. I'm the one
you're talking about." Verse 20. Where
is it? There it is. He says, "Ego, I am
the one. The I am that's me. I'm
speaking to you. So your f what Jesus is
trying to get her to focus on is him.
That should be I should be your focus.
Let that be your focus. Now she says
that I met a one someone who opened up
and told me all about me.
Did Jesus tell her everything about her?
No. They weren't there that long. But
the most pertinent thing. So the thing
that is most pertinent in your life that
been has been the issue has been this
issue about who to be with who to marry
that has to be secondary in your life.
It has to be doesn't mean that it can't
happen again or won't happen again. What
I'm saying what has to be primary in
your life is him because there will
never be any sort of fulfillment ever in
life outside of Jesus. Whatever you're
trying to fill up in your life, it will
be a bunch a bunch of holes. It's like
pouring water into a bucket. Um because
God has put holes in those buckets. It
will not last. It has to be him. So your
questions can no longer be especially in
the foreseeable future. It can no longer
be can I get married again? Should I get
married again? No.
It has to be who you should be married
to.
>> So
>> make make yourself out to be the true
bride of Christ.
Okay.
>> Bellifi didn't do anything for you
anyway.
>> Correct. What I'm And I understand what
you're saying and that's where I'm at.
I'm single and I am pursuing a
relationship with God. My first
husband's alive and he wants to kind of
I guess he wants to reconcile. And I
guess like I don't want to be married
right now or in a relationship,
>> but it seems to me the Bible's saying I
shouldn't get married again unless it's
to be reconciled with him. So just
moving forward cuz I'm only 50. I'm
thinking, "Oh, I got to be by myself for
the rest of my
life."
Then I'm thinking, "But he's alive, so
maybe
Once their time comes, I have to go back
to him. There would be no other future
for me.
>> Okay. And I'm trying to
say
>> is he even a Is he even a believer?
>> Yeah.
>> Okay.
Are you?
>> I am.
>> How do you know?
I'm not And by the way, I'm not saying
you're not.
>> I'm not I'm not I'm not saying you're
not, but I do this with everyone. How do
you know?
How do I know that I am a believer?
Well, because I believe the Bible and
everything that it says and Jesus Christ
is my savior.
>> Okay. So, you've you've entrusted what
he his finished work on the cross for
your for your salvation. Absolutely.
Okay. So, now
>> uh prove it.
>> Not to me.
>> I'm not talking to him.
>> Not to me. Not to anyone else.
>> I'm really trying to figure out. Okay, I
understand.
>> Prove it to you and to God.
Prove that you are a a believer. Prove
that it is in him that you live, move,
and have your being. Prove that it is no
longer I who live as Jes as as Paul
says, but it's Christ who lives in me.
Prove it. Cuz if you can be satisfied
with him,
you then whatever the future holds is
whatever the future holds. But it
doesn't do any good to get saved. I mean
to uh to to get married to be with
somebody or to do or get a job or do
something else
>> if you aren't fulfilled in Christ,
>> it's going to be it's it's going to work
work for a bad marriage again, a bad
relationship.
>> I'm not interested in in um getting
married right now.
>> Okay.
>> I I'm I'm more so trying to understand
what the Bible says about it so that as
I move forward, I'm doing the right
thing. Are you asking if biblically you
can be reconciled back to your first
husband?
>> No, I'm asking if that's the only option
since that's what the Bible says.
>> Bib biblically. Biblically, you are to
either be reconciled back to your first
husband or not be married. Now, I hate
to say what
>> that's that that's that question.
>> I hate to say what I'm about to say
because I don't want you to think that
that that I'm giving you a way out. But
there are
>> I'm not looking for a way out. I'm
looking for the right way.
>> There there are people who have gotten
remarried and the question is going to
be, am I in trouble because I got
remarried and my remarage was not
biblical.
You're not in trouble because there are
no perpetual sins that God holds against
you. But is it disobedience? Sure. Will
there be consequences for it? Sure.
But you're not but God is not going to
hold his thumb over you because you did
this thing. But it is because God wants
to picture our marriage with his
marriage to us.
>> Right. And correct. And so that's what I
want to be. I just want to be I want to
be right. I have no interest, you know,
right now in that. But that scripture
just always comes back to me um because
I'm single again and different things
like that. So, I just wanted to be
clarified and I understand God's not
going to put his thumb on me, but I want
to be right with him. I want him pleased
with me. So,
>> that's what I would do.
>> Yeah. So, biblically, that that's that's
that's how it should be done biblically.
Okay.
>> Thank you so much, Corey. I appreciate
everything you do.
>> All right, sister. Thank you.