Video summary
In this episode of Inkplot Alchemy, artist Kim Das Holm explores the intersection of creativity and mental health by transforming a chaotic ink blot into a visual representation of his current state of mind. He begins the session feeling overwhelmed by immense pressure, admitting that despite his efforts to cancel various obligations to relieve stress, he has instead been procrastinating until the tension builds up excessively. This cycle of waiting for pressure to accumulate before entering a frantic "beast mode" of productivity is a tactic he has used his entire life, a pattern closely linked to his diagnoses of autism, ADHD, and bipolar disorder. The video documents his struggle as he attempts to draw while feeling like he is buckling under the weight of these accumulated demands, highlighting how unsustainable this high-pressure approach ultimately becomes.
As the process unfolds, Kim experiments with adding water to the ink blot, only to find that the act itself becomes another source of stress rather than a release. He acknowledges that while he claims to be the master of his creation and can ignore external expectations, the reality is that he is running out of energy and steam halfway through the intro. The initial attempts at drawing fail to materialize into a cohesive piece because his mental reserves are depleted, leaving him feeling unable to continue. This exhaustion forces him to confront the consequences of his delayed productivity, where the only output left is the very act of creating art under duress, resulting in a third attempt that finally yields an image after significant internal conflict and fatigue.
The final artwork emerges as a somewhat generic design resembling logos or album covers, which Kim accepts not for its originality but for its honesty in reflecting the pressure he endured during its creation. He concludes that while the piece is not what he initially envisioned, it serves as proof that he did not completely buckle under the strain, allowing him to declare the mission accomplished. By releasing some of the tension and accepting the outcome, he hopes that looking back on this drawing years from now will evoke a sense of truth regarding his experience with pressure. The video ends with an invitation for viewers to support his work freely or through purchasing prints, emphasizing that there should be no pressure in engaging with art, contrasting sharply with the heavy burden he carried throughout the session.
Read the full video transcript
Hi there. I'm Kim Das Holm and this is
inkplot alchemy where we use our
creativity to draw something from out of
chaos. Now what will we see in today's
ink blot?
Oh my
Oh my [sighs]
I don't know what I'm seeing here.
But I know what what I need to see
because I've been putting myself under
too much pressure
and I feel I'm buckling under it. I want
to draw something that that in some way
represents that. That's what I'm looking
for in today's ink plot. You can look
for something else. But while we keep
looking and seeing the possibilities,
allow me to explain what we're doing
here, what inkplot alchemy is. Two times
every week, I make art from a random ink
blot, and release the full process
video, unedited and unscripted, except
for this tiny little intro script.
I may have ideas of what to draw, but
the ink ultimately decides the
direction. It might get dark, it might
get silly, it might get personal, it
might get political.
If you want to skip the whole process,
then that's okay. We are marking the
final image in the video, so you can
just jump to it. But if you want to come
along for the journey, then random ink
drawings is not just drawing. It's fun.
It's play.
It's magic. It's inkplot alchemy.
Now, do you see anything here?
Comment below what you see and I'll ruin
it by doing this.
Okay. So, I said that I I've been
putting myself under too much pressure,
and that is weirdly true
because
what I've actually been doing is trying
desperately
to take the pressure off.
And
that hasn't
it hasn't not worked,
but it hasn't
quite gotten me to the place where I
need to be. And
well, I just now I I I'm just playing
around still.
Let Let's play around some more. Let's
do these as well.
Let's do a little bit here. We're
overloading
the
paper with water. So we should have used
some more heavyduty
water
than what we have available.
Yeah. So, so, so
this was the first.
See, I I I'm already starting to buckle
under the pressure of just doing this
damn thing.
And
that's not too much pressure because it
doesn't have to be anything. I can I'm
the master here. I can decide exactly
what I'm doing. I I can
ignore
what I want to ignore.
I can add what I want to add. And I can
take away the whole damn ink plot if I
want. I I'm making the rules here.
There's always these comments saying,
"No, no, but you should have done it
this way or this way." No, I I do it my
way. That's
that's the magic of inkplot alchemy is
there's no right way of doing it.
There's no obligation to do one thing or
the other thing. It's just
the doing of the things. The thing
doing,
the thing doing
and uh the thing doing
can be whatever
you want it to be. And I have a little
secret
because
so far in the Inkplot Alchemy series,
every drawing
you've seen has been
the first attempt.
All of them always nailing it
in the first attempt.
But this time,
my first attempt
was this thing here,
and I just ran out of steam.
The second
is this thing here. It's still wet.
And halfway through the intro, I just
felt I can't do this.
And then
with this one,
I felt the same.
I felt all the steam leaving me,
all the energy
leaving me. And I felt, no, no, I don't
want to do this.
I can't do this. It's too much. And and
I've been, as I started saying, I I've
been trying to take the pressure off
myself
this fall and cancelling so much
different stuff that I I
need to do the the, you know, jobs and
obligations and hobbies and
appointments and it's cancelling
so much and I hate that so so incredibly
much. It it feels so bad. I don't want
to cancel things. I want to do
everything.
Then
when I cancel
everything,
I'm still
left with this.
I I'm diagnosed
with autism and ADHD and a bipolar
disorder.
And
what I've come to understand
after getting the autism and ADHD
diagnosis is that a lot of the things
I'm
experiencing are
more typical
than I'd like to admit.
Uh
a and one of the things that I've been
doing all of my life
is whenever there's something that needs
to be done, [snorts] I've been waiting
and waiting and waiting, procrastinating
for the pressure to build up. And when
the pressure has built up enough,
I get this incredible burst of energy
and
I go into beast mode and I can do
everything.
And
that's been
a tactic of mine to postpone until the
very end. and then
somehow landed together. Sometimes that
go sometimes is good, sometimes is bad,
sometimes things come together,
sometimes less so. But
that's been
a tactic of mine
and it's not an uncommon tactic,
but
it's not sustainable either.
And
lately
I've been noticing that that
how much energy that takes, how that
leads to crashes, how that is probably
very much part of the reason why I got
diagnosed
bipolar. whether or not
that's true or that's an accurate
diagnosis or not that I'm not going to
in go into that now
but there's sort of waiting to build the
pressure
and then
hoping you can go into beast mode and
yesterday
I sort of for the first time in a while
managed to go into beast mode and I made
did a lot of stuff. I I made four videos
and I wrote some stuff and I planned
some stuff and I
um made dinner and I did the dishes and
I did all this and you know all jumping
between all of these things.
Um,
and I almost got to the place where I
needed to be.
I almost got enough work done so I could
breathe out and
try to
relax and
not
not exhaust myself,
but I didn't. And so this morning I woke
up and the beast mode was just gone.
And now
I have to deal with the consequences.
The consequences is
drawing.
This is the third drawing
in order to get to one drawing. And I
think this this looks like
this looks like something.
I think it works.
I don't know if it's the Punisher logo
or Wolverine
um
Uprising album cover or or something
like that, but it it definitely looks
like
something.
Um
but I that's okay.
In my visual library,
I have all these
things that I I've looked up to all my
life.
And it's only natural that sometimes
what comes out
is inspired by that.
And I don't know if this is the
uh did I say vulvin logo, punisher logo
or
the the the
uprising album cover or [snorts]
whatever it is. I don't know. That's not
too
important really.
But it is
something built under this
pressure that I've put myself under
and also
something that is
reflecting
said
pressure.
So I think
it's simple.
It's not
terribly original.
It's not what I thought it would be.
But it is what it is. And I think I
should
[sighs and gasps]
release some of the pressure and say,
"Yeah, mission accomplished.
You did it. You
didn't buckle.
Hopefully you agree.
And hopefully when I look back at this
drawing
in a few days or a few years or decades,
hopefully
the feeling of it
will ring true.
And that is ink blot alchemy pressure.
And if you like this drawing and want to
support what I do, then remember all my
art is released for free use under
creative comments attribution license.
You can use it freely and using it is
supporting me. If you want to buy the
art then this one is available.
The original is available at donga.com.
So are highquality prints. So that's a
fantastic way of supporting art in the
age of AI and all the and the
slop.
Support artist. That I think that's I
think that's important. And I would
appreciate your support if you like art
like this or if you want to use it for
anything. And uh if you there's you can
do it. You can do it. There's no
pressure. There's no pressure. See you
in a few