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I found joy in making art again and so should you. (reacting to fanart)

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Video summary

Freddy, the creator behind "Ex-husbands," shares an inspiring journey of rediscovering her passion for art after a period where she felt disconnected from creative expression due to personal struggles and societal pressures. She explains that during her transition, she initially relied on makeup as a form of artistic outlet but eventually fell into autopilot mode, treating it merely as work rather than joyous self-expression. This shift led to feelings of burnout, anger toward the world, and a loss of purpose, causing her to stop engaging in activities like sketching or painting that once brought her happiness. Through therapy and a conscious effort to reclaim her identity, she has begun healing from these negative patterns and is slowly reintegrating hobbies such as drawing animations, writing by hand, and playing games simply for the sake of fun rather than content creation metrics. The core message of the video revolves around the importance of creating art without fear of judgment or the need to please an audience. Freddy emphasizes that while social media platforms often encourage comparison and criticism, true artistic value comes from personal fulfillment and the act of sharing one's unique perspective with others who appreciate it. She encourages viewers to stop apologizing for their work regardless of its perceived quality and reminds everyone that art is meant to be a sanctuary between oneself and the canvas, not just another job or performance metric. By focusing on internal joy rather than external validation, she hopes to inspire others to pick up pens again, charge tablets, or engage in other creative hobbies like crocheting or baking as ways to maintain their humanity amidst a chaotic world filled with politics and digital noise. A significant portion of the video is dedicated to reacting to fan art submitted by her community, which serves both as validation for Freddy's return to creativity and proof that others are also finding inspiration in similar spaces. She expresses genuine delight at seeing diverse interpretations of herself, ranging from simple stick figures to detailed sketches with specific attention to shading and anatomy, noting how each piece helps her appreciate different aspects of her own appearance, such as her monolid eyes or facial symmetry. Freddy uses these examples to illustrate that there is no competition in art; every artist brings a unique style shaped by their age, experience level, and personal preferences, making the act of creation inherently valuable regardless of technical perfection. She also shares how creating fan art has reignited her own desire to draw daily, leading her to start sketching herself again despite previous insecurities about proportions and facial features. Ultimately, Freddy concludes that reclaiming hobbies is essential for mental well-being and preserving one's soul in an era where life often feels like a relentless chore list driven by economic necessity or political stress. She acknowledges the rising costs of living but argues that engaging in whimsical activities adds necessary color and meaning to existence, urging viewers not to let fear of failure prevent them from trying new skills. Whether it is learning cursive handwriting for better motor control, experimenting with pixel art blocks, or simply enjoying Animal Crossing music while drawing cats, these small acts serve as "third spaces" where individuals can exist purely as humans outside the constraints of productivity culture. Freddy ends on a hopeful note, promising to continue sharing her artistic process and encouraging everyone to find whatever hobby brings them joy, assuring viewers that their efforts matter even if no one else sees them, because the primary goal is simply to remain connected to what makes us feel alive.
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Hey, what's up you guys? My name's Freddy. Ex-husbands, am I right? Can we pan to camera two? This looks so ew. Ew, I hate that. Hi, how are you? It's your local autistic girl. Would y'all have bullied me? Yeah, y'all would have bullied me. But now I get to live it as an adult. Anyways, hi y'all. My name's Freddy. I got a little update for everyone. I want to do a listen to them video and look at some fan art that y'all have been doing. Thank you so much. Back in my day, we didn't have a YouTube community tab for other people to randomly post and the fact that they just rolled this out randomly, I finally realized and I checked, there's been fan art this whole time for months and I didn't I want you to know if you're watching, I have 100% seen it. I will always try to like it, to reply. If I don't see it, post it again after a month. So, small update, if you haven't seen the last one that I did earlier this year, my favorite phrase, I was going through a lot, went down in my personal life, with my family, with myself and now I am doing better. I used to care so much about what people thought of me when I was first starting to transition that I went down the inevitable pipeline of constantly on Twitter and Instagram comparing myself to other trans women, hating my own body and that happens in like the first month cuz then you were finally conscious of the fact that you're transitioning and that things are happening to your body. Also, hormones are just a whole other level when you're going through adult puberty. Those have settled down now and I also lost the purpose of like my life. >> You what? At least I thought because I was going on autopilot for content. If you don't know, it's been my job most of my life. 10 years, she's a grandma and also your local art teacher, I guess. Had to do a lot of things to just pay bills for me, other people that I started to hate the content I was doing and the work I was putting into the world because art at its core, that's what this video is about, is a form of self-expression and I was doing that my whole life because I had more time as a kid. I was in art classes in college, I was doing photography in high school, so I actively was making art and trying to encourage my mind to be more creative and then doing YouTube on the side for the fun of it cuz it wasn't a job, it was just a hobby. That's when uh Freddy's Art Camp, now renamed Freddy because, well, transition, became a thing and I stopped doing it. I tried cooking, I tried digital essays where I was yelling about everything including Steven Universe and I regret that. And I moved it to makeup and makeup was a great form of art expression. But then it started to change because I started to see it as trying to look feminine only, trying to be pretty. This is like the first few months in the transitioning. I was just doing makeup for the sake of getting it done and just auto piloting. And when Freddy doesn't have a way to express herself through journaling, sketching, painting trades. >> What did you say? Then I get mad. Then I lash out at everyone including this guy right here. Not him. Lane's right here and Bender's here. It basically felt like I started to I just started to hate the world. That's like the simplest way to put it. I hated how people treat trans people. I still do. Hated this country because of how many people are Trumpies. I stopped doing things that fuel my brain creatively. I wasn't doing art anymore. I was just treating it like work. Nothing was fun. So it poured into my videos, the way I treated others. I am now working on that because I've been in therapy for a few months. One of the most humbling things was being told you've made a lot of mistakes. It was extreme ego death in the best way because then I just immediately was saying hey you can't do this anymore. I started doing makeup again. I did this post the other day. So embarrassing to say. It made me cry because suddenly I was drawing for hours doing these little animations that end of the day people can generate AI that now. Bad thing by the way, stop. There's templates online. You don't even have to make anything. You can just upload it. But I was just able to put on some TV, listen to Animal Crossing music, be with my cats and just draw for hours. And then I started sketch booking again. Let me show you. I just started it. This is literally the first page. Is me writing again cuz I don't write anymore. I just only type. There's people who don't know cursive. Please learn it by the way. Will help you down the long run and it's this deep. Learning cursive gives you a steadier hand, helps you in instruments, helps you in college. If you're learning how to do surgery, calligraphy, painting, something as simple as cursive or doing a drawing every day and help round up your learning as you age. Whenever people ask me for an eyeliner tutorial I go one it already exists, but two you need a steady hand. How do you get one? Those of you who care so much about being perceived, it doesn't matter. Why do you care so much about strangers? They don't matter. In the sense of their opinion doesn't matter about what you're doing. This is meant for you. No one has to see it. You don't have to post it. Even if you do, of course there will always be a side that is judging. Every video I post, some transfer will end up on it. Someone's going to hate my video. Someone's going to say they don't like the lighting, they don't like the aesthetic, they don't like how I look, they don't like my voice. But am I going to let that take away the joy of me being able to do what I want and just share it with the community I want to gain. I have seen people on here who have watched me grow up from high school to college to to now. Like you've seen the whole transition. You know too much. And I keep getting reminded that I used to do more art back then. That was when I was the happiest. And I haven't been that happy since well, starting to now. Because I'm doing art again. I'm not saying you need to. I'm not saying make content. I just mean in a world where everyone wants to take away your time, make you miserable, prevent you from being to access hobbies, being third spaces, play video games for the sake of it. Have the time to crochet. Find something. Cooking, baking, doing science projects, reading a book. All of these are just to train your mind to help you get out of this world for a little bit. To exist as a human outside from politics. Actually, it is political because for us in the US, the Department of Education is being defunded. There are less and less teachers, there are less art programs to even fund. We started crocheting these little Woobler. What are these called? Wobbler? This thing. I've only done one. Most fun I've had in so long to just film. I'm so excited to edit it. Sorry that I randomly It's just that the video I posted about Generator Guy last week, I did not see such an influx of people just wanting to draw in general because of it. I didn't realize that it could inspire people that easily. This is not me gassing myself up by the way. I'm just trying to point out. It makes me very emotional to know that there is something as simple as a video like this where you can inspire someone to want to draw again. To pick up that pen, to charge that tablet, to learn a new skill, a new hobby for the sake of it. And at the same time there are people who say, "I don't see the point of this if you're not getting better." It doesn't matter. I don't care if you're say you're good or bad. You're both equal to me unless I'm paying you for something. Work is good or bad. Art is meant to just be shared between you and the canvas or the world if you choose to. No one has to see the art for you to be happy about it. So please, if you're doing art, stop saying I'm sorry if it's bad. I'm sorry I'm new to it. I know the internet has become a place where people fear judgment within the community which unless you're asking for it, it doesn't matter. As long as it's making you happy and you're not hurting anyone, please just do it to remain human because there are there is less and less of that because everyone is in a relationship with a chat GPT therapist. Anyways, we're going to look at fan art. Some frequently asked questions. Yes, of course you can draw me. I don't know a person who would say no. I love any fan art. It can be a stick figure. I don't care. It's all beautiful. It's fun to share. Oh my god. I'm sorry. I want to put more effort into this community and make sure that there is just a congregation of lesbians every day. I'll keep this world afloat. I am going to be consistent with weekly videos on Saturdays cuz I if I could do it as a kid, I can do it now. There is a Twitch stream of me turning latent into Pam Bondy if you want to watch that on Twitch. We also play games on there. You should join. And we got a podcast, too. I'm not doing this video to like judge fan art. I just want to say what I like about it. That's all that matters. Don't feel bad if the fan art isn't good compared to other people. You are all different age groups. You have all different levels of learning art. There's no competition needed. Like look at this. It's a sunflower. So cute. And I love my eyes. What I've also learned through that, everyone who draws my eyes, it makes me appreciate them more because I used to want double eyelid surgery. Hated my monolid growing up. Now I definitely don't cuz of that. Yeah. Drawing where I had double eyelids. Like look, you got every part of my face. And the background colors is two a T. Which crayon is that? Love the blush. Love my dress. Also with every piece of art, you get to know so much about who's drawing it. I can reasonably predict an age range. I guess you know how you personally color things in, that you prefer markers. And that there's people who prefer sketching and I just uh the eyes are so cute. I haven't seen fan art of this yet. It's my lipstick makeup. Beautiful. There are so many that I saw just from that one video about AI and they're like, "Hey, I drew this in an hour just to spite them." It's gorgeous. This is the beginning of a thumbnail and I know exactly which one. Like look at the shading. I've never I don't really see reverse shading like that. I just want to point out this one. This is one specifically that really made me appreciate my monoliths. And you have a ton of blue pencils. Amazing shading. Also hair is so hard to do. Never be afraid to trace. Never be afraid to do a simple shape. Stylize it in a unique way. I don't care about the hyperrealism. I don't care about AI trying to go as close as possible to mimic humans. I like seeing how people interpret humans. How would you interpret drawing a rose to 100 people? They'd all look a little different. >> There can be 100 people in the room. There can be 100 people in the room. You can have 100 people in the room. 100 people in the room. You know, 100 people. You know, there can be 100 people 100 people >> Also you can make candy. You can make a bracelet. I just struggled to do this and I used to know how to Rainbow Loom as a kid. Any hobby could help you in life cuz it helps here, okay? Y'all need to care more about the soul and adding more fun and whimsy into your life. Literally if even if it is dressing colorful because I don't do this as much. That was during the #arthoeesthetic on Tumblr. Thank you all so much. It is a priceless thing to be able to say, "Because of y'all, I was able to find my passion for art again." Seeing other people get inspired to art makes me want to do it again and I started like in one week, I started doing sketchbook, I opened up Procreate again, practiced more animations for myself, started playing games again off stream just so I could have a little bit of me time, bought more pixel art blocks. I can't wink. That was bad. I know life is getting more expensive and that everything feels like a chore and I always said skin care and makeup are ritual, but separate from that, skin care is not art. For me personally, I need something physical. I need something physical. I need something with my hands while I still can use them. Everyone is temporarily able-bodied until disabled. I just want to draw it again. I hope y'all start to enjoy doing art. I didn't realize how many people liked art still here. You know, it's been a long time since I've done a Freddy's art camp, but I hope me showing this We stopped because Layton un- did a whole row and he got mad. I'll be showing more of my sketchbook. I'll be showing more of the how I do makeup. There is a whole separate channel for it, and that's like the tutorial side. But, I'll just be making more edits. I want to tell you how I do photography. Like I said, I want to show more of the artistic and artistic side of me. And to do something for exposure therapy, I'm going to sketch myself. Hopefully, I've been drawing this whole time on the side, but now you get to see it. I should be finishing up my sketch. I haven't sketched in a while. I'm already doing it. I'm doing what y'all say. Sorry, I'm not the best, but guess what? It doesn't matter. I'm doing it. I'm learning. And I have proof that I can be good. I don't care about that right now. I just want to do it. I've been editing this all night. You can tell I just woke up from a nap. I'm pretty sure this is my first self-portrait of myself. Like, I've taken photos of myself in the past, gotten used to my face, but I hated drawing them because I just didn't know proportions, didn't know how to do facial symmetry, so I avoided it my whole life. I know it's not the most accurate photo of me. I did this in like 20 minutes. This all goes back to that one journal video I did so long ago, where I journaled every day for a month, and I just documented it. And I also did that in Procreate, where I just learned how to use Procreate in a month and documented it. And I want to emphasize that unless you are literally doing this for your job, there is no need to one post it online or focus on other people's perception. Because even while sketching, I was like, "Ugh, what if the eyeliner is off? What if it's not as good as other people that have posted things?" And then I remember, "Hey, you don't do this stuff. This is literally just your free time you're just choosing to upload it. Who gives a truly, if it's bad?" If art is only made to be consumed and judged, I think it loses its value in learning it. Cuz then more people never bothered to pick up the pen because they believe they'll never improve or that it's not worth it. Or they get mad at themselves, and that is a separate issue, and that's something you need to heal from within. I learned how to do eyeliner after 5 years. I think it's safe to say that working with my face every day helped me just learn how to draw myself. Now, I know how my face actually looks. And because I'm 24, and I just have more of an idea of what I want to draw, how I like to add a little bit of my own style into it. I hope this inspires y'all. I really have been enjoying the last few weeks because I've just been getting back into my own hobbies. You know, they say don't turn every hobby into work and I was like, I will do the opposite because it's fun. At some point it does get to you if you're not compartmentalizing those parts of what is truly a hobby and what are you doing for work just to get it done. What do you mean you started to hate something you've done your whole life? So yeah, let me know what art videos you want in the future. I'm currently working on that crochet. It's going to be Freddy's art camp revamped because we have better cameras now and I'll see y'all next week. Leave a comment about your favorite album cover and why. I love you all. Everything is less than three. See y'all next week on Saturday.