How To Achieve SUCCESS FASTER Than 99% Of People (START DOING THIS) | Tom Bilyeu

Failure is the single most information-rich data stream that exists. I cannot promise you that you'll ever be successful. The very thing that you're pursuing in your life is very [ __ ] simple. It is fulfillment. That's it. So, if you want to actually make your dreams come true, I'm not telling you not to chase money. I'm just saying it's not going to feed you emotionally the way you think it is. So, you've got to completely divorce yourself from this notion of outcome and become completely obsessed with the idea of sincere pursuit. The reason to tie that to sincere pursuit is it's the only part you can control. And now, please put your hands together for a night with Tom Bilyeu. Hi, I'm about to ruin that [ __ ] good mood. Let me tell you right now. We'll see how fast we can get cut right through the [ __ ] So, we want these nights to have their own unique fingerprint. When we decided to do a live series, we didn't want it to be the same old, same old. I didn't want it to be just the speech that I go and do when people bring me out to an event. I wanted it to be something where if you came to 10 of them in a row, every one of them was going to be different. And so, that's why we wanted you guys to participate. We had people send in those videos. We had you guys write up on the wall what your hopes and fears are. I watched every video that was sent in. I read everything on the wall. And that put my team in a bit of an anxious state because nobody knew what the hell tonight is going to be. And quite frankly, I know what my intention is. I know what I want to do. I know what I want to accomplish. But I don't know the path that we're going to take. And that path is going to be uniquely determined by the people in this room. So, this night will only be as good as you guys engage. I'm going to try to get us into a headspace. And then I'm going to open it up for questions. And the questions are really where the magic happens. If you can keep it a question and keep that [ __ ] brief, which is not necessarily everybody's strong suit if they have anxiety and someone puts a [ __ ] mic in your face. So, I get that. But if we can do that, if we can get to a place where we're really cutting through the BS and we're talking about what's really going on, then we can actually get to the true nature of success. And that's what I want to talk about. Tonight for me, this is all about demystifying success. Because there's this sense that people that achieved something great have some innate thing in them that allows them to do this. And if you go read that wall, you're going to see certain things over and over and over. I'm afraid I won't fulfill my potential. I'm afraid I'm going to embarrass myself. I'm afraid that I'm not going to be good enough, that I don't have what it takes. That's the kind of stuff that you see over and over and over and over. It is so [ __ ] universal that until you can address that in your own mind, until you can understand the hard [ __ ] truth, which is that you're not yet good enough. In fact, I want you guys all right now. I want you to look to your left. And then I want you to look to your right. And see the people sitting around you. And I want you to know this about them. Their dream almost certainly is not going to come true. Now, that's some dark [ __ ] to open an evening like this on. And like I said, we guys were all standing and cheering and it was so nice and I should just come and say some nice things to you, but that is my biggest [ __ ] fear in life. Lisa and I have already been very financially successful. We don't have to work, and yet we're working harder than ever because I believe that there is a way for the most average of people to actually make their dreams come true, but I'm only interested in the actually part. I spent a lot of years of my life being an empty dreamer, where I had a vision of what I wanted. I had all the [ __ ] ambition in the world, but I did not have the drive, the fortitude to do what his shirt says, which is do the work. Now, if they had let me, that shirt would read do the [ __ ] work to really get people's attention because that's that's the truth. And for those of you that resonate with David David Goggins, like then you'll get the thing that you have to have inside you if you want to be successful. Now, in all of these talks, I'm going to make one presupposition. And if you're with me on that, then it's going to be a good night. And if you're not, maybe it'll be fun and entertaining, but at the end of the day, I don't know that I'm going to be of use to you. And the supposition that I'm going to make is that you want to be extraordinary. You want to do something big, that the dream that you have is worth fighting for. That's also why I say when you look to your left and to your right, the people that you're looking at are almost certainly going to fail at making their dreams come true unless unless in these 90 minutes, and this is my intention. In these 90 minutes, we're able to touch on the real [ __ ] that it takes to actually be successful, to get your head in the place you need to be, and then to do the things you actually need to do. All I'm going to be talking about tonight, it is a game of [ __ ] execution. Once you realize success is not some mysterious thing, it is simply a relentless game of execution, of falling on your [ __ ] face, embarrassing yourself over and over, picking yourself back up, and asking one simple [ __ ] question. Why did I fail? And if you can ask that question without pointing the finger at somebody else, but really look at what you did that caused that situation, then you're going to be able to begin down the path of real skill acquisition. A lot of the things that I say are not [ __ ] sexy, and I know I could have a following 10 times the size. There's Jeremy Mary, by the way, the guy that runs our Instagram page. Do not clap for that [ __ ] And I'm going to tell you why. He may be the hardest working Frenchman you were ever going to find, but he'd be real [ __ ] happy for me to just lie so he can hit his OKRs. And if I came on and I spitfire about, "Man, you can do it. Your dreams are going to come true. This is going to be [ __ ] awesome. I believe in you. Everyone here believes in you." And then I would go shoot myself in the face because it wouldn't [ __ ] work. And when you get to like, "What do you really want?" Like someone put up on the wall that their big fear was watching someone they love suffer in front of them and feel powerless to do anything. Now, I will hazard a guess that many of the people in this room are living that nightmare right now. How many people here have someone they love who is living a very sub-optimal life because they can't get their mind in the right place. That's basically all of us. So, that is the human condition. The human condition truly, I think the Buddhist have it have it right. The human condition is [ __ ] suffering. And what I'm going to talk to you about, like I said, there's two paths. One, I'm going to assume you want to do something extraordinary, but it is a path of suffering. And when you understand that, when you understand what you're going to have to fight through to actually accomplish things, then you can begin to really frame things correctly so that you can follow through and get where you want to go and not live the cliche of money can't buy happiness and all that. You realize that you're chasing fulfillment, but fulfillment is often born of suffering. But it has to be suffering with a purpose. And so when you begin to understand that cocktail, you can differentiate it from the other side of the coin, which is a stress-free life. A life that is not on offer tonight. Because I cannot help you with that. That is not the life that I've chosen. For me, I am driven. And if you've read Tim Grover's book Relentless, you know exactly what I'm talking about. For whatever reason, a little bit of wiring, a little bit of reinforcement as a kid, a whole lot of obsessive beliefs and value changing as an adult, has led me to the point where the only thing that gets me on fire, the only thing that wakes me up and makes me feel alive, is to believe that I can do anything that doesn't violate the laws of physics. And now I'm just racing against a [ __ ] clock to do it. But now the reason that Lisa and I have had the kind of success we've had is it was never okay for us for it just to be an idea that we pushed out and pushed out and pushed out into the future like we did about having kids. Because that we had planned 2 years after we get married, right, baby? That was 17 years ago. But with making our dreams come true, we always had after the initial period, which you guys have heard about and I'll walk through it a little bit, but after I got past that, it was all about relentless execution and constantly judging myself against metrics. Like, was I actually making progress or not? So, if you want to actually make your dreams come true, man, and if I can [ __ ] explain this, this is like one of those breakthrough moments for somebody, like when you really get what I'm about to say. All right, my friend, I have a big announcement. My incredible and talented wife, Lisa, is about to launch her new book, Radical Confidence. In it, she has managed to perfectly capture the process of how to go from feeling lost and insecure to taking control of your life and doing amazing things despite feeling fear, sometimes a lot of fear. Now, let me tell you, nobody knows Lisa better than me, but when I read Radical Confidence for the first time and heard her describe what it was like for her to go from having these big, exciting dreams as a kid to then as an adult scheduling her life around the TV shows that she wanted to watch, or how lonely and isolated she felt instead of pursuing her dreams, it was brutal for me. I would never say, though, that it was worth it for her to go through all of that just so that she could write something down that allows others to avoid it, but I will say that at least she was able to capture the strategies that she used to break out of that rut, find her voice, and begin doing incredible things despite her insecurities and fears that she wasn't going to be good enough to achieve great things. So, while it hurts me to know the dark place that Lisa went through, I really am excited for people who are going through something similar right now to read this book. Radical Confidence is an instruction manual for how to become the hero of your own life, even when you're scared to death. Look, I know better than just about anybody how easy it is to get off track in life, or to just not have yet found your calling, and it's even easier for people to feel so insecure and unprepared that they don't even want to pursue the things that they want. But what Lisa shows people in Radical Confidence is that the radical part is that you can accomplish extraordinary things even when you feel fear. That's what radical confidence is. Being afraid and unsure and having a toolkit that allows you to still make massive progress. Pre-order your copy today because if you act now, you can claim the bonuses that Lisa has created for you at radicalconfidence.com. They're only available if you pre-order, so act now. Then, once you've done that, we'll get back to today's episode. All right, guys. Read the book and get ready to be the hero of your own life. Peace out. In fact, right now we're all going to make a promise to ourselves. You can do it silently. We don't have everybody shouting it out. But you're going to make a promise to yourself right now because if if you follow through with what we're about to say, everything will be different. If you fail to do this, you'll come back a year from now and you're going to write the same [ __ ] on the wall. I promise. Because this is the part that you have to break out of. Make yourself a promise right now that you will disengage your sense of self, your sense of self-worth from achievement. And you're going to marry that [ __ ] to pursuit. Once you are wholly focused on sincere pursuit, everything changes. When you're focused on outcome, when you're saying to yourself, "I want to get rich. I want to win the Academy Award." Ah, those are my dreams. It's an end state, right? It doesn't work. Like here's one of those things. Things become trite because they're so [ __ ] true. So, please, for the love of God, don't make people repeat the most obvious [ __ ] ever like money can't buy happiness. Okay? Money can't buy happiness. It can buy a lot of cool [ __ ] It bought me a really [ __ ] nice house. In fact, baby, show the photo. Yeah. We actually own part of that jet company. I'm not [ __ ] joking. How crazy is that? We know the [ __ ] CEO. There was one time where I was trying to get on the flight and they were giving me [ __ ] I can't remember why. And I called the CEO up and I was like, "Yo, you need to talk to your gate agent." Like, that's [ __ ] money. It's [ __ ] bananas. Money is better than you think. It is more powerful than you think, but it is not at all what you've been told. Money solves [ __ ] money problems. And that's awesome. And there's a lot of cool stuff that you can do with money. There's no joke. So, we run Impact Theory out of our house. Our house is like 10,000 square feet, [ __ ] swimming pool, balconies, all that crazy [ __ ] One of our rooms is actually called like actually when we bought the house, they called it this. It's called the great room. And that [ __ ] thing is big. I'm not joking. We once played um Nerf with Nerf guns. We did like a whole hide-and-seek, capture the flag thing in the [ __ ] house. It was crazy. So, money does really extraordinary things. People will chase money forever because money actually has utility. So, I am not the guy that's saying, "Oh, money doesn't matter or money's not a thing or money's not worth the pursuit." What I am saying though, money really can't buy happiness. The very thing that you're pursuing in your life is very [ __ ] simple. It is fulfillment. That's it. Now, I sum up fulfillment very simply. How do you feel about yourself when you're by yourself? Do you feel good? Do you feel like you're making the most of your life? Are you tapping into what the Greeks called techne? Are you working your ass off? And that's a key component. Is it hard? Are you working your ass off? Sad but true. Are you working your ass off for a set of skills? This is oh, you This is the angry face. This This is This is about tapping into rage. We talked about that, Elizabeth. Not at rage yet. We'll get there. But there we go. So, you really have to work hard for a set of skills that matter to you. Now, the skills have to matter. That's a key part of the equation. Once the skills matter to you and they allow you to serve not only yourself, but other people, and then you actually go and serve those people, it becomes this really potent cocktail of neurochemistry. But I want to make sure that everybody understands the game that you're playing is a game of neurochemistry, right? In the last year, at least two billionaires committed suicide. So, let me say like it's [ __ ] heartbreaking when anybody commits suicide. But when billionaires start committing suicide, like if the answer is not just self-evident beyond all imagining that money is not going to solve the problems that exist between your ears, like there's there's nothing more anyone can tell you. A fool never learns. A smart man learns from his mistakes. A wise man learns from the mistakes of others. On this one, I'm [ __ ] begging you, be wise. I'm not telling you not to chase money. I'm just saying it's not going to feed you emotionally the way you think it is. So, you've got to completely divorce yourself from this notion of outcome and become completely obsessed with the idea of sincere pursuit. Now, why sincere pursuit? The reason to tie your sense of self, your self-esteem, your pride, your ego, your identity, all of that, the reason to tie that to sincere pursuit is it's the only part you can control. I cannot promise you that you'll ever be successful. You cannot promise you that you will be successful. But you can promise and know if you actually did it to show up every day and really pursue it. You control your mindset. You control how you feel about yourself. Nobody can actually get you to feel some kind of way about yourself. You allow that [ __ ] in, right? That's like the cheesiest self-help [ __ ] you're ever going to hear, but it got cheesy because it's so true, so people repeated it a lot. And if you lose sight of that, if you lose sight what you allow yourself to think is going to control you at a neurochemical level and at the neurochemical level, that's going to influence then again how you feel and how you think and then you get into this death spiral where you're thinking negative [ __ ] you believe in the negative [ __ ] which makes you feel badly about yourself, and then you get stuck in that and you can't get out. And you see a lot of that on the hopes and fears. People afraid they're never going to be able to break free. People in this [ __ ] room that took the time to write it down that they were never going to get out of that negative loop. And that negative loop is really real, but here's the thing, the negative loop is based in biology. And once you begin to understand what the biology is exactly, then you can begin to take control of your life. And step one in the biological train is to break the tie that you have between outcome and worth. Once you begin to break that down, then you can step to the [ __ ] naked and raw and say, all right, this is just practice. And once you're in that mode of practicing, you're in skill acquisition mode. And the name of the game is [ __ ] skill acquisition. Like it really is sort of that dull and boring. It's just about getting so good at something that you can't be denied. And that's one of those things like I'm going to say that phrase so much that I worry that's going to become trite, but that is one of the most awe-inspiring notions on the planet. The thought that you could become so good at something that you leave people in awe. And when you can leave people in awe, you can do just about anything you want with your life. The easiest way to talk about awe is to think of sports figures. Right? You've got sports figures, you see somebody like Michael Jordan or Kobe Bryant, you see what they do, and you think, "Oh my god, like they're given a human body just like I was, but look at what they're able to do with theirs. It's absolutely extraordinary." And whenever you talk to the best of the best, these [ __ ] always they always put in the work. And that is the obsession that anybody that wants to be great and achieve something has to have. It's got to ultimately boil down to the skill set. Now, here's the problem. The reality, and this is where I think most people get derailed. If you're able to detach yourself from the outcome, you're able to start thinking in this new way, it's about sincere pursuit. That idea of sincere pursuit puts you in the path of skill acquisition. The next thing that kills dreams real [ __ ] fast is the reality of what you're trying to build. To understand the reality, who knows what is the second law of thermodynamics? Entropy. Now, entropy is a fancy word for chaos. What it's saying is this is a this is a [ __ ] law of physics. Everything moves towards chaos. A system without additional energy added will always move towards chaos. Think about your bedroom. Think about the dining room table. Think about anything. You leave that [ __ ] alone for 30 seconds, she's already poking him like, "Yo, motherfucker." I'm going to send him pictures cuz god damn, that's chaos. That is certainly my wife. She's literally laughing right now because I am an agent of chaos when it comes to that kind of thing. That is for sure. Anything left to its own devices is going to move towards chaos. All right. Staying with physics, how do we then create things that have order and structure? We pour energy into the system. And I'm not saying this in a woo way and everyone in this room has permission. If you ever hear me use the word quantum mind, just [ __ ] punch me in the mouth. If Einstein didn't understand quantum physics, I assure you self-help movement does not understand quantum physics. So, I want to keep this [ __ ] nice and real grounded. That that drives me [ __ ] nuts. The reason it drives me nuts is I think it throws people off the trail of what you really have to [ __ ] do. All right. So, the thing that really begins to [ __ ] people up is that they have this idea. They want to accomplish something with their life. They're able to move over, start thinking about practice. It's all about pursuit. They're judging themselves based on that or they sincerely going after it or not. And then they get into the middle of that [ __ ] And it is so mind-numbingly boring. In fact, we I think have some photos, Lisa, if you haven't already shown them, that are the realities of what Quest was like to build it. Because what people see, they see the sexy side. They see us at the Inc. 500 gala. They see Lisa wearing her Louboutins showing off the red undersole. She was very proud of those. But they don't see this [ __ ] which is where it started, when nobody knew who the [ __ ] we were. This is before my man Dave Beram, who's hiding in this audience somewhere. This was when nobody knew who we are. Nobody gave a [ __ ] People were actually saying things like, "I don't eat protein bars, man. No, thanks. I don't want any. We were giving them away for free. People wouldn't take them. We called one distributor up and he said, "And I quote, I need another protein bar like I need another hole in the head." We went into a category that had 1,600 other bars and flavors and had been declining 4 years in sales. Nobody wanted the product that we were making. But we believed we had what Peter Thiel calls the zero to one. We had a secret that nobody else understood. It meant that we had to become our own manufacturers, which is how I went from making software all day to making protein bars all day. So this is me literally making protein bars. Like this is the the grind. This is the boredom. This is the sincere pursuit. This is the showing up every day. We had to assemble our own equipment, which I actually think we have a photo of as well. So this is us. This equipment showed showed up one day. A big [ __ ] off like semi backs up and we're all like, "Well, how the [ __ ] are we supposed to get it out?" I'm not joking. And we're like, "Are we really that dumb?" And so we're scrambling and we're like, "All right, the neighbor in the building, he's got a forklift, but nobody knows how to drive forklift." And I'm like, "Actually, I do." And my partners are like, "What the fuck?" And I'm like, "As a kid, man, in my family you had to work dead end jobs. My dad had me in a paint factory. I worked in a paint warehouse. I worked in a paint factory and a paint store. I'm a [ __ ] certified forklift driver. So, we actually had video of me. I turned to the camera cuz we were filming it and I was like, "Dad, wax on, wax off." I was like, "Fuck, you want to talk about a skill I never thought I would need." There it was. So I literally drive a [ __ ] forklift, put all this [ __ ] down, and now here we are not knowing literally there's a manual in here somewhere and we're opening the manual going through trying to figure out how to put this [ __ ] back together. It was [ __ ] bananas. But this is like this moment right here. One, what's on my face? I'm [ __ ] smiling, man. I'm smiling because I believe in what I'm doing. I have a mission. I'm not just trying to get rich. There's something that I believe in. There is people that I love that were suffering that I wanted to do something about. I had them on my mind and then truly advanced class [ __ ] and hopefully we'll get into this more later. When [ __ ] really [ __ ] goes wrong. Man, this is promise to yourself number two. Promise to yourself number two. When [ __ ] really [ __ ] goes wrong, that's the time to laugh. That's the time to be like, all right, if I go playful right now, it will change the dynamic of everyone in the [ __ ] room. I'm going to ask one person in this room. I want to [ __ ] hear you when I say your name. You better be in this room, too. Casey Elliott. Make some [ __ ] noise. That woman is so hardcore, you can't imagine. But she really feels it when she [ __ ] up. So Casey, when you [ __ ] up, what's my attitude? Learn you're going to learn from that and be glad it happened and Am I angry? No. Am I upbeat? No. She's like, [ __ ] you're not upbeat. Understanding. You give me that much. Whenever possible to bounce in that opposite direction and change the dynamic of the way that you're thinking so that you don't get trapped in your own neurochemistry because when you have an emotion, the chances are you believe that emotion. But the brain has this crazy [ __ ] weird mechanism where however big you react, it goes, "Oh, it was that big of a deal." So if you freak the [ __ ] out and you're yelling and screaming, then your brain's like, "Yeah, man, it really it matters that [ __ ] much." Like, I said no cheese on this [ __ ] hamburger. There's [ __ ] cheese on this burger. That [ __ ] is crazy. You You can't [ __ ] do that. You can't put Get the [ __ ] paper. It says no cheese. And when you wind yourself up like that, then literally it just gets hardwired that yeah, this really is that catastrophic. But the reverse is true. Something horrifying happens. Something terrible goes wrong. And if you can in your mind just flip it and be like, "Yeah, we're going to figure this out." And I remember in the early days when we got the equipment, everyone told us, "Guys, the bar you want to make, it cannot be made." And I can't tell you how many times we heard that. It's kind of a boring story as to why, but people just kept telling us over and over, "It can't be made. It can't be made." We never planned to be our own manufacturer. We thought we'd outsource that. Every time we went to make it somewhere, they said, "You're going to have to add liquid sugar to this. Otherwise, there there's just no way to make it." And we said, "Well, that would defeat the purpose of the whole company, so we're not going to do that. So we're going to go buy our own equipment." They're like, "You can buy it. It's not going to [ __ ] work." And we were like, "No, no, no, man, this is definitely people are just being too lazy." And we've got the will to see this [ __ ] through. So we're like, "All right, let's buy it, send it in." Got it, put it together. We're like, "I knew it!" Forklift driving, the whole nine. We're like, "Yeah, we got this." And then we ran the first attempt. And it didn't work. Yeah, that [ __ ] You can't You can't make that bar in that equipment. I'll just I'll save you some time. If anybody wants to buy some old equipment, by the way, let Let know. So we had like this area that we called our follies. And so, we would take things that didn't work and we would put them over there. And when we first got this stuff together and it didn't work and we were trying and trying and trying and trying and it was hours. And by the way, I'm not I am not This is a a shout-out to the guy earlier who told me he burned the ships to be here. I'm not a burn the ships guy. I don't think you need to burn ships. I'm a nights and weekends guy. I think you need to work harder. That way, you don't have a gun to your head financially because that puts you in a place to make short-term decisions instead of long-term decisions. You always want to be somewhere where you're making long-term decisions. So, we were running a software company by day and then on nights and weekends, we were building Quest. We were making the bars at first by hand, then we were getting the machines and trying to figure that out. And then when it didn't work, one of my partners was a literal Iowa farm boy and he had worked on tractors his whole life and he's watching the line one day as it's just all going to hell. He's like, "I think I can fix this." And we're like, "Okay." And he was like, "No, no, no, you're going to have to let me cut it apart though. And if it doesn't work, then we're out." It was like all of our money. And we're like, "Whoa." Now, you have to keep in mind, I went to Lisa and I said, "Hey, we're going to have to put our house up as collateral for this company. And if we fail, then we lose everything." And she literally, without missing a beat, she says, "I bet on you." That that is that was one of those things where literally in the moment I was like, "Say it again." Which she has so many times. That woman, she is for real ride or die. But in that moment where he's like, "Hey, I want to cut this [ __ ] apart and then put it back together, but if it doesn't work, then we're out the money." I'm thinking I'd be out of my house. And the one conversation that I don't want to have with my wife is "Hey, you know, we we had literally, I think, just gotten the house like 6 or 8 months before that." So, I was like, I do not want to have that conversation. And so, that's where the the mentality of burning the ships becomes important. But, tie it to something that is already real. It's already there. There's no way around it. You're not going out of your way to create more problems for yourself. So, I was not going to lose that house. And so, that became like the thing in my mind. All right, we're going to try this, but we are going to make it work. And so, he literally got a Sawzall out and a blowtorch. He cut that [ __ ] apart. He put it back together, and it actually [ __ ] worked. And that was one of those moments where you're like, "Whoa, man, you really do have to have a certain appetite for risk." And so, that's the third thing I'm going to say you guys need to do. You've got to give your yourself permission to royally [ __ ] up. Because if you're afraid to royally [ __ ] up, if you're afraid to lose the house, it's okay to say I'm I'm not going to do it, man. I'm going to [ __ ] fight and push, and I'm going to do everything I can to stop it. But, if you're not willing to accept those kinds of consequences, you will have to play it smaller. So, you've got to give yourself permission to royally [ __ ] up. Now, why am I not afraid of royally [ __ ] up? Because I know one thing. This is so [ __ ] important. Failure is the single most information-rich data stream that exists. You will never learn faster from anything than you'll learn from failure. One, pain, psychic pain, triggers all kinds of things in your brain. The hippocampus becomes more active. Your amygdala becomes more active. You write the memories harder. Your brain focuses on it more. So, there's just this intensity that happens when you fail. Also, failure is essentially the closest thing you're going to get to a sporting result. The nice thing about sports and part of the reason they become like this gladiatorial thing that we obsess over and think about is because you know who won and you know who lost. You know who's the best, you know who's the worst, you can see the [ __ ] stats, you watch it happen before your eyes. It's very hard in life. We don't often get that. Does my boss like me? Do they not like me? Am I going to get the promotion? Am I doing what I want? Should I even be in this job? Like you've no [ __ ] idea. And then you make a decision and you don't know like would it have worked out better the other way? Who knows? You never get to try it. So, when life slaps you in the [ __ ] mouth and you realize that you've really made a catastrophic error, then if you can approach it defenselessly, meaning you're not trying to protect your ego. Because you wisely have already promised yourself that you're not going to tie your ego to the outcome. You're going to tie it to the sincere pursuit, so you need only ask yourself one question. In attempting that thing that I just failed catastrophically, was I sincerely pursuing the right outcome? And if the answer was yes, you get to feel good about yourself. And so, you step into that moment saying, "I tried and I failed. I know that failure is the most information data rich stream that there is. So, what is the lesson here?" And getting good at teasing that out and facing even more than I'll say figuring it out, facing what you've done wrong, owning it, accepting it, allows you to not make that mistake the next time. And my encouragement to you guys is never judge yourself to the lens of a moment. You're going to mess up. You're going to mess up a lot. And if you loop negatively over that mistake, it just isn't effective. And I always tell people, do and believe that which moves you towards your goals. Like if you just repeat that one obsessively in your head, then one day you're going to get to a point where you do something and it really makes you dislike yourself. Hello, my friend. You know that I believe success requires you to see failure as the ultimate learning tool. Success requires you to be disciplined and gritty and to never ever quit on your dreams. I say all of that because one thing is certain, the road to achieving your goal is not smooth or linear. I wish it was, but it's not. It's going to be bumpy, sometimes scary. Some days you'll take two steps forward and slide 10 steps back. And that's why success also requires you to know how to pull yourself out of a rut and get unstuck fast. Life is short. You can't be messing around with your goals. You've got to make progress every single day. So, I've pulled a class from Impact Theory University called how to get unstuck, which you can watch for free with the link on your screen or by clicking below. When you join me for that free preview of that workshop from Impact Theory University, I'm going to teach you my strategy for how to understand exactly where you need to be going, how to identify the obstacle that's blocking you, and the best way to make the most progress towards that goal and keep your momentum. All right, click that link and let's get to work. All right, I'll see you on the inside. And you're going to have to ask, does disliking myself move me forward or not? If it moves me forward, then I'm going to do it. But chances are it's not going to. You may want to feel the sting of it. That may really propel you forward. But you don't want to exist in that state where you're just allowing yourself to beat yourself up because no good ever comes of that. At that point, it is simply punishment. And so you have to ask yourself the value of that punishment, the value of the duration of the punishment. And so I began to be able to talk myself out of these self-limiting ideas, these beliefs about myself not being able to do it, simply because I said I'm willing to live, even if I don't believe it. I'm willing to live by the edict that I should only do and believe that which moves me towards my goals. And I had this thing in me I wanted to punish myself, I wanted to beat myself up when I did something stupid. I want it I certainly started thinking less and less of myself. And it just became ever more clear that that wasn't serving me, it wasn't propelling me forward. And so building in these beliefs rules in your life become the foundation upon which you're going to build. And so this notion of building something brick by brick of looking at your life on a long timeline, of not judging yourself in a moment, but rather I like to look at myself in 10-year increments. If you ever want to feel good about yourself, look at your life in a 10-year increment. Because maybe over a month you didn't do anything very interesting, you can't really put your finger on what you've learned or who you've met or have you really made any progress. Maybe you had a bad year. And so looking at that year, you're like, "Damn and I really moved backwards." And I asked this question one time of a guy that went through his residency. And I said, he was about to become a full-fledged medical doctor. And anybody in ITU, this literally just happened this last week. And I said, "Think back 10 years and what you knew about human biology at that point. Imagine you were going to step out and perform surgery on somebody or be a GP and make recommendations for somebody with the knowledge that you had then. What would that feel like?" He was like, "That'd be terrifying. I'd be terrible." And I said, "Now imagine how much you've learned in that 10 years." And he was like, "Yeah, fuck." And he's smiling. And I said, "Now I want you to realize if you play the game right 10 years from now you're going to think of who you are today the way that you thinks of you 10 years ago. And that's when this [ __ ] gets fun. Because when you realize stumble here, there, failure, fall on your face, whatever, none of it's really going to matter if you're just relentlessly learning and learning and learning and learning and learning. And if you're doing that and if you're staying focused, then you're going to be able to begin to stack these bricks and build the thing that you want to build. But to build that thing, you're going to need clarity. Now, I'm just curious as to what's on the screen behind me. The bad news is if I were to sit with you and push you on it, the odds are that you still lack that clarity. Now, clarity is one of those things that I talk a lot about, so I'm not going to beat it to death tonight, but I just want to say however clear you think you are, you're not clear enough yet. And the reason that I can say that just beyond a shadow of a doubt is when you know something from like 10,000 angles, you just know it from every which way, you know exactly like quadrants on a map, you know precisely latitude, longitude, all of it down to like a grain of sand of where you're trying to head, when you have that, then you really can come at it from any angle. You can divert for a moment because you know where you're going back to. When you don't have that clarity, you're always lost. And that's where most entrepreneurs spend their time because remember, if I was the person I wanted to be, I would have walked out tonight and said, "The only thing that stands between you and your dreams is a set of skills." And then drop the [ __ ] mic. But I know that that doesn't break through. It doesn't get through to people the way that I want it to. But once you if you can return to that over and over and over and over, every time something goes wrong in my life, I am asking myself one simple question. What is it that I suck at? I suck at something. There's something I'm doing wrong. By definition, if I were doing it right, then I would be getting the outcome that I wanted. I'm not getting the outcome that I want. Therefore, I'm doing something wrong. It is all my fault. I'm not trying to feel badly about myself because I am divorced from the outcome. I'm only valuing myself for being a learner, sincerely pursuing. That's it. So, I'm not saying all that stuff to kick the [ __ ] out of myself, to feel badly about myself, to hold myself back. I'm saying it because the [ __ ] reality working your ass off, getting [ __ ] good. By the way, this is me at an airport. We had a delay. And in fact, anybody see the Tony Robbins episode? That's me stuck in the [ __ ] airport on our way to interview Tony Robbins. And I was like, this [ __ ] is going to know I know who he is. The intro was like broken into chapter and verse. I had that [ __ ] down. He actually, I don't remember if it made the final cut, but he was like, "Yo, I'm sorry you had to read all that." I was like, "Tony, I needed you to know. I know who the [ __ ] you are, Tony." But like really going in heads down, like just just believe. This This is my new obsession. The human animal. We don't have big fangs. We don't have sharp claws. What we have is the ability to change. We're crazy [ __ ] adaptive. And I'm sure you guys have heard the quote, "It's not the strongest of the species that survives nor the most intelligent, but rather the most adaptive to change." Our ability to change is unparalleled. There is no other animal that you can find in the number of locations that you can find us. My famous before and after. Hey, nothing quite like standing in front of a group of people in your underwear twice. Uh I would like to point out my wife put these together. Um, well, first, let's talk about the one on the left. This is one of my favorite stories. So, I had been lifting, believe it or not, for a long time over on the, uh, I guess your guys's left. Yeah, so, on the left, my my heavy picture. I've been lifting and lifting and lifting and lifting, and I went to see this friend that I hadn't seen in years, and I wore my tightest shirt, and I was like, "Oh, my gosh, she's going to say something." And my wife knew how excited I was. I was like, "She's going to see me and be like, 'Oh, my god, you got so buff. [ __ ] what did you do?'" And sat down, spent the whole night with her, and she didn't say a goddamn thing. Like, didn't even bring it up. I was like, "What?" And so, my wife and I are leaving, that lovely, beautiful woman who introduced me, and she said, when I asked, I said, "Yo, can you believe Sophie didn't say anything?" And she was like, "Oh, maybe she just thought you got fat." What'd you say? That's a possibility? I was, "What?" I was literally beside myself. That is actually the night that that was said to me. I was like, "All right, we're taking that [ __ ] before picture right now. Right this very second." And then it's about an unending amount of work. There are 2 years in between these pictures, two grueling years of fighting with my wife, because she was telling me that I was dieting wrong, and I was so [ __ ] hungry, I could not hear that [ __ ] You can't try to take a man's fat burner when he's doing 2 hours of cardio a [ __ ] day, all right? That's icy [ __ ] But, when you put in the work, you and the body is is a really [ __ ] tangible example of just how much change the human body is capable of. And so, when you see what you can do to your body, it is this insanely powerful reminder of just how much adaptation you're capable of. And that game of adaptation, like once you buy into, I am an average human, the average human is capable of extraordinary adaptation. Adaptation follows certain rules. All I have to do to become extraordinary and get where I want to go is follow the rules of adaptation. That is the [ __ ] gospel truth. That's it. That is the name of this game. That is how you acquire skills. You do what is called deliberate practice. Read the book The Talent Code. Read the book The Talent Code. It's on my list. So, everybody in this room, of course, has already read all the books on my list, right? Read the book, man. That [ __ ] book makes it really clear, "Hey, there are three levels in the brain that you learn in. One's sort of surface, one's intermediary, and then one's deepest [ __ ] your brain, and that's where it gets into the autonomic nervous system, where things are happening automatically, where you're just good at [ __ ] and where you look effortless." Like right now, I know one of you people, even though you know me, you know my [ __ ] story, you know when Lisa said, "We were in a room with four people." They were her [ __ ] family. I'd known them for a decade. They asked me to tell the story, and I could I literally couldn't speak. I had gotten so anxious, I had let my mind run away with me so much, I could not have people talk to me, I couldn't have them look at me. If there was any expectation that I was going to talk, my [ __ ] heart would start racing. So, nothing that you're seeing right now is a result of, "Oh, he has natural talent." But I know that's where people go, because you do something so much. Like none of you are thinking about, I'm not joking, when I was a kid, I wanted to be a stand-up comic. So, I would spend [ __ ] hours with a hairbrush in front of the [ __ ] mirror making faces and [ __ ] And the fact that now I only have two faces really pisses me off. I have big smile and neutral and I look pissed. Literally, we just had this conversation yesterday at Impact Theory. Somebody was like, "You know, have you ever thought about standing in front of the mirror?" Yes. I've already [ __ ] done it. I did that when I was 12, god damn it. Didn't help. Here we are. But you clock so many hours doing something over and over and over that you really, if you do it in a deliberate way, and Daniel Coyle in the book The Talent Code breaks down exactly what deliberate practice is. It is not simply repeating something. It is going to the thing you suck at. So you often will hear people say, "Hey, just figure out what you're good at and do that." I have never, ever, once, ever encountered something where I could get paid to just masturbate. So if that's the [ __ ] deal, then I'm in trouble. But that [ __ ] I took to that fast. I won't lie about that. No training, nothing. I just [ __ ] I knew what to do. It was [ __ ] amazing. But getting good at other [ __ ] that I could actually monetize and do something with, that's been a very different story. That's all been about deliberate practice. It's been about figuring out how the brain works, really understanding the brain science of this all, and getting into that, and structuring things like that. So you're going, "What am I weak at? Where am I not good? What is the thing that I need to focus on?" Because once you start doing that, like once you get into ah, this is what is necessary for me to get where I want to go. This is the gap between where I am and where I want to be, and that gap is made entirely of skills. Then the fear kicks in, and you're not going to believe in your ability to cross that chasm, okay? Now, here's what I want you guys to do. Crossing the fear chasm is actually deadly simple. It's the easiest thing you're going to do. But it requires you to unwind some of your beliefs. Because right now in fact, this is a lot like money. People are going to tell you, "Oh, money can't buy happiness." And they're they're going to say then don't don't chase it. And you're going to think, "But god damn, I have to pay rent. I want to drive a car. I need some gas. I need to eat." And so part of it when people say that, you're like, "Yeah, yeah, yeah. Money can't buy happiness, but it [ __ ] pays for a car payment and it puts my kids through school and all of that shit." And so you can't like ever make it gel. And fear is the same thing. Because when you fail it is going to hurt. You will go through a momentary crisis. I still do. Every time I fail, I go on that roller coaster. The key is how fast can you make that roller coaster? Can you get it to a day from 3 days? Can you get it from a day to an hour? Can you get it from an hour to a minute? From a minute to a second? Can you get it to the point where it doesn't even register on your face? And that became my goal. I wanted to see how rapidly I could change my emotional state. And could I change my emotional state so quickly that people didn't even realize that I'd had a big reaction internally. That I fell on my face and that it sucked and I was embarrassed and horrified. And when you begin to get that kind of emotional control over things, then you're going to be able to move forward. So the key to doing that is one, you have to practice shortening the amount of time that that hurts. But the only way that you're going to be able to do that is letting yourself off the hook. One, to stop thinking the negative voice is going to go away. It almost certainly is not. I've never met anybody who didn't have a negative voice. I've seen monks speak that have been meditating for 40 years and they have a negative voice. It is This is why I think really understanding the truth of human biology is so [ __ ] important. Like, to to not be tricked by your brain because you know how it works. You know that there are literal parts of your brain. It's job It's job. It's evolutionary function is to worry. There is a region of your brain called the deep limbic system. If you want to really get [ __ ] up, this is so crazy. Read the book by um V.S. Ramachandran, Phantoms in the Brain. And he talks about syndromes where people get certain parts of their brains damaged. And there is a part of your brain, the deep limbic system, if I [ __ ] that up in you, you no longer experience emotion. So, your brain has a region that tells you not what's happening. It tells you how to feel about what's happening. If that doesn't right there already tell you you're living in the [ __ ] Matrix, your brain has no intention of of just giving you like objective data. It's not about that. It's not just saying, "There is a thing with fur, a face, a heartbeat, claws, it's 6 in you're dead." Right? It's like, "Yo, [ __ ] Something moved. It's a little bit orange. Run like [ __ ] hell." And that's it. And so, you have these things. That's their job to keep you alive, to keep you safe. But now you put yourself in a modern context, you have to know what's going on so that you can de-escalate that [ __ ] Because more people, or I should say, people are more afraid of speaking at a funeral, giving the eulogy, than they are of being in the [ __ ] casket. Like, about the time that you are so afraid of what other people think you would rather be dead than be embarrassed. That's when you know your mind is not always working for you. Once you begin to realize, "Oh, my mind is not always working for me. It does not have the same agenda that I have." Then you can begin to say, "Okay, how's it work for me? How does it work against me? What are the rules? How can I bend some of these? This is why I'm obsessed with the movie The Matrix. It is the perfect metaphor for the human condition. I don't think we actually live in a simulation, except for the one created in our own minds, right? David Eagleman episode. Watch that one. He talks about how your brain is literally encased in total darkness, and yet right now, do you not all feel like you're perceiving light? It feels like the [ __ ] light is just getting into your brain, but it is not. It is being translated into electrical chemical signals that your brain then translates and creates a virtual representation of what it sees, and it's good enough that you don't bump into too much [ __ ] but it is all [ __ ] painted with what the brain thinks you need to stay alive. And one of the things it thinks you need to stay alive is a really [ __ ] negative voice telling you, "Don't [ __ ] do that, man. You're really going to [ __ ] that up. Now, for real, people are going to be super embarrassed when you [ __ ] that up. You're probably going to lose your house. By the way, you barely got this job. If you quit this job and go to another job, who knows how long you've heard the economy's going to turn. What the [ __ ] you going to do then? Are you going to get laid being broke? Uh-huh. Real sexy in the back of a [ __ ] minivan." And that [ __ ] just plays and plays and plays and plays and plays. And if you know it's coming, then you can interrupt it, and you can insert other beliefs that actually make [ __ ] sense because they move you towards your goal, right? Which is why we have to have clarity. So, once you have clarity, you know what your goal is, you only believe that which moves you towards your goal, you hear the negative voice, that does not move you towards your goal, you interrupt it because you understand the way the brain works, you hit it with this mantra, phrase, whatever rule, belief, whatever that thing is, and now you're changing your neurochemical state, so you don't actually feel that oppression. But that's what I want people to understand is all of this you're living this life in this neurochemical soup. Like [ __ ] is going to happen. You're going to feel some kind of way all the time. And that feeling is as real as you let it be. Or you can be like, "No, I don't choose to feel that." And then change the narrative and feel something else. And that sounds like just self-helpy words, that [ __ ] is real. That is the truth of the human condition. There's a book called The Brain That Changes Itself. Think about that. You have an organ between your ears. It is considered to be the most complex thing in the universe, more complex than the stars, more complex than [ __ ] plants. And if you know anything about photosynthesis, those [ __ ] are not for play. I mean, we can get into all the like crazy plant [ __ ] That That's like a whole thing. But there are a lot of lot of really complicated things in this universe, and nothing comes close to the complexity in the human brain. And so, beginning to understand how to leverage that thing to not be beholden to it, to really begin to harness its power so that you can move where you want to go, where you can take control of that process and propel yourself forward, but it all comes back to actually understanding how it works. And when you understand that you're living in this neurochemical soup, that all of that stuff is alterable, and that it changes through thought alone. That's crazy. Through thought alone, you can change You can change the physical wiring of your brain, the most complicated thing in the universe, by thinking about changing it. By thinking about changing it. And if there's anyone in this room that is I I am not an expert on this, but I find myself deeply, deeply, deeply fascinated by it. If there's anyone here suffering um from major trauma, something has happened to you, and just a room this size, I can guarantee a massive percentage of you have, you owe it to yourself to explore medically supervised MDMA or something like that. Now, why? I've never done it, but why do I think if I had a trauma, I guarantee it is the [ __ ] first thing I would do. Why? Because what it's doing you guys know who Roger Bannister is? 4-minute mile. 4-minute mile. All right. The notion that the 4-minute mile was beyond human capabilities stood for decades. So, imagine for decades we have professional running track and field people going for it. I'm going to do it. No, you're not. It's not possible. The lungs, the heart, they can't handle it. People kept getting close, but nobody could break it. And so, everybody just said, "Look, it is medically impossible. Humans cannot run a 4-minute mile. Just [ __ ] accept it and move on." And then one guy was like, "Nah, I refuse to believe that." He was a medical student. And I don't know if some of it came from actually understanding the body. And he was like, "There's nothing in the physiology of the human body that would tell you you can't run a [ __ ] second faster." So, for decades this thing stands. Then people start saying, "Well, maybe somebody could break it, but it would have to be under perfect conditions. It would have to be a windless day, dry conditions, and he would have to be in front of like a big crowd cheering him on to run his best performance ever." And Roger Bannister shows up on a rainy, cold, wet, windy day in front of like 26 people. And [ __ ] breaks the record. Now, that's not the trippy part. The trippy part is 19 days later somebody else broke the [ __ ] Beat his record. It stood for decades. Imagine something standing for 40 years and then within 19 days is broken again. Within a year, within a year three people break it in the same race. Once you believe something is possible, once you taste that thing, that other thing, like Tony Hawk when he was trying to do the 900. He was like, "Honestly, I didn't know if it could be done." And so, once he landed it, then everybody started doing it. And it just became Dave Mirra. Like, "Yeah, yeah, yeah, of course. If you can't do the 900, you can't even [ __ ] compete." But it had stood for so long until you could see, "Oh, it can be done." So, the MDMA thing is it puts you in such an altered brain state that you realize you can love yourself again. And when you feel that just [ __ ] intense acceptance, and you're looking at the trauma, you're looking at the trauma. Do this with somebody who knows what the [ __ ] they are doing. Not saying go to Vegas and get ecstasy. Medical treatment, MDMA. Find a study, they're out there. But being able to taste that other thing, the other state of loving and accepting yourself totally, even though the neurochemistry is going to radically change as you come out of that, you've now tasted it. You've run the 4-minute mile. You know it is possible. You've experienced it. You lived it. You were there. It's not somebody telling you about that [ __ ] It is actual to you. You know it's possible. And that's the [ __ ] thing about success. That's what I want you guys to taste. I want you to know that this has been broken by somebody just as dumb as you. I'm not joking. You look at me as like an after photo. I look at me as a before photo. Like, if you show me This is one of our first offices. But if you show me And I don't know if you already rolled them, baby, but um show the the photos of me as a kid. So, genius, right? Obviously. You can tell that kid's [ __ ] bright. He's going places. Uh I used to wear that all the time. And yep, there's another one. This was a This is a hat I was particularly fond of. So, I did not take myself very seriously. So, when I always tell the story that uh my own mother, who was my biggest cheerleader, quietly assumed that I was going to fail when I left for college. There she is. What's up, moms? So, she had reason to believe that I was going to fail. I didn't take myself seriously. I didn't take anything seriously. I cheated all the way through high school. And it wasn't until shame, quite frankly, started dragging me out of bed. I was engaged to the lovely and beautiful Mrs. Elizabeth Villieu. And yeah. And she would come home. This is we are living at her mom's house, by the way. And that's not sexy. Living at her mom's house, she was working, I wasn't, and my only job was to make her a sandwich when she came home for lunch, cuz she would come home for lunch. And I would lay in bed saying, "I'm going to get up in 5 minutes. 5 minutes. 5 I'm going to get up in 5 minutes." And I would lay in bed for 3, 4, sometimes 5 hours in the morning, and the only thing that got me up was knowing if I didn't get up right then, I wasn't going to have her sandwich ready when she came. And that was like a shame too deep to bear. And so, I would scramble down, my hair a mess, in just sweatpants, the same sweatpants that I wore every day, which she uh did not find very sexy. And I would make her a sandwich and be kind of mad if she seemed a little off that, you know, I had I made the sandwich. Yeah, you know, if you could do your hair, maybe that would be nice. And I was just like, "Jesus, ask, ask, ask." And finally, I realized I told her I was going to make her rich. And when I proposed to when I went to her dad to ask for his blessing to propose to her, he told me no. He wasn't going to give me his blessing. And he asked me a super powerful question. And he said, "How are you going to take care of my daughter?" I was broke. I didn't have a job. And I said, "Sir, look. I know what you see is a broke kid who's under-educated from Tacoma, Washington. And what you don't see is that I'm the most ambitious person you've ever met." And I thought he would be moved. And I thought he would be like, "You know what, kid? Good on you. Go marry my daughter." And he didn't. He was like, "Look, you can have sex with her, but for the love of God, do not marry my daughter." And I'm not joking. He didn't use those words in his defense, but he made it abundantly clear. "I'm not old-fashioned, Tom. I'm not old-fashioned." And they have a Greek phrase, "Sigasi ya." Which means slowly, slowly. So, that became like the mantra for the whole family because everybody knew that Andreas had this whole thing where he wanted me to take it slowly, and I was going far too fast for him. And I said, "Look, sir, I respect what you're saying, but I am going to propose to your daughter." And there I am. She said yes. I gave her the whole speech. "I'm going to make you rich. This is going to be [ __ ] amazing. I've got all this ambition. I'm going to make it happen." And as I'm laying in bed, I have a pivotal realization. Which is that there is a massive chasm between ambition and drive. And I had the ambition, and I did not have the drive to see it through. But I was so ashamed of myself that that shame actually propelled me forward. Because I now had essentially people watching. I had a father-in-law who wanted to know what I was going to make myself. I had my fiance who wanted to know like if I was really going to be the man that I promised her I was going to be. And so, that got me moving and that got me headed in the right direction and that got me into all the things that you see now, but it was this incredibly long journey of being disappointed in myself and having shame and not knowing what I was doing and being in over my head and spending so much time in over my head that I end up developing crushing anxiety because I'm failing so much and I'm failing so often, but I have not yet divorced myself from the outcome. So, because I'm so tied to the outcome, every hit is a hit to who I am. And so, I begin turning inward and I'm thinking less of myself even though I'm moving up and moving forward, I just spent so much time smack bang on my face doing something stupid, saying something stupid, actually [ __ ] something up and costing a lot of money over and over and over. And so, because I thought that meant I was bad, I was unworthy, I was never going to be able to achieve something, it was sending me into this [ __ ] death spiral. And it wasn't until I really started having to learn about the brain to get out from underneath the anxiety that I began to put a lot of the pieces in place, the rules, the beliefs and everything that ended up allowing me to catapult forward. And that is what for Lisa and I Impact Theory is all about. It's just getting people to realize you're an average human, being an average human is enough, you can change far more than you think, but it's going to be really really [ __ ] hard. And so, I cannot promise you that it is going to be easy because the dreams that you guys want to do, they're big. And some of you guys have specific dreams that are gigantic. And I [ __ ] love that. And while I think the most powerful thing you can give any human being is doubt, I'm not going to give you that tonight. What I want to give you tonight is a very simple idea. You can have, do, and become anything you want. Anything you want. If it doesn't violate the laws of physics, you can have it, do it, become it. Doesn't matter your age, gender, ethnicity, sexual orientation, literally none of it matters. But what does matter is you have to become extraordinary. So the first step in this incredibly arduous journey that you're going to be on if you want to be extraordinary is simply to believe you can become extraordinary. It will be hard. You will fail. You will be afraid. You will embarrass yourself. You will make mistakes. There will be the dark night of the soul. And in that moment, in that dark night of the soul, the only thing that's going to rescue you are your beliefs about the way the world works. Because you're not going to feel good about yourself. But if you can piece that mindset together where it's about the pursuit, that you're a learner, that's your identity, then you can begin to cobble this stuff back together and get back up on your feet and get moving. So said simply, the idea I want to leave you with, it does not matter who you are today. It only matters who you want to become and the price you're willing to pay to get there. Thank you. All right, the first thing to know about me is I am not a born entrepreneur. Now, there are many people that consider themselves a born entrepreneur. I am not one of them. I know that there were kids out there that had lemonade stands when they were like 6 months old. They couldn't hold their head up, but they could sell. That was not me. I was