Does True Love still exist ama dust delayed is not dust denied?

[music] A very good morning to you. How are you doing? How is the morning? Today's a beautiful Wednesday morning. It's exactly 4 minutes past 7 in the A.M. on the 16th of September. Yes, I am very excited because we are about just about to start singing I want to wish you a merry Christmas. Yes, Merry Christmas. I can't wait. But yes, good morning. How are you doing? My good name is Eliza Kimmani. I am your host. I am your TV host of the Yeah, [laughter] and I am your host for the day. And as always, I never sit alone. Yes, I'm here with an amazing de looking lady and yes I'm here with her. Let her say hello to good morning. Good morning. You know what's the occasion for my people and I have to be presentable before them host of the year. >> Oh yes, you know. Good morning. I go by the name and it's another beautiful Wednesday right here on Y24 and talk to us on our social media pages at Y254 Instagram, Facebook Xpia. Talk to us. Let us get to know where you're watching us from. And by the way, speaking of September 16th, I think we try again next year. >> Next year we have next year by the way because have you realized that time is really moving so fast? like and before you even notice September is almost over and cuz it's two weeks to quisha and you realize that like she is saying some resolutions have not even been touched >> that's the big big problem but I had someone say by the way that for them what they do they write according to the quarters of the year >> okay >> that that way and follow up and make sure that accomplish what she wanted to accomplish. So I think that's how we should work as long as you're living, you're happy, that's what matters. The rest don't give up. Don't give up. But I think because even when you look at the weather, I think September it's really cold. Tell us by the way where you're watching us from. Is it cold? The weather here. It's not our weather. This is not what you're used to. >> Exactly. They borrowed it fromwhere and it's not normal. But anyways, we are grateful because I had a friend who was telling me she's very excited. She's inal and she's a big big farmer. So, she was telling me that she's very excited because of her crops. I was like, "Wow. people we look for. Anyways, that's by the Speaking of [laughter] Have you seen the breakout stories? It's crazy especially among celebrities and you know you don't understand what's going on. What's going on? you want to get you're like, "Hey, let me let me stay back because are you sure this is what I want to do?" And um people have different views in regards to that. But one thing that stands out is why were you getting married to that person in the first place? >> Exactly. >> Was it out of me? I believe feelings in African feed. [laughter] >> At some point I feel I I I I was thinking about this story and I have this friend of mine. She's she's my best friend. I love her with all my heart. But [laughter] watch that's why I am I am saying she will watch it later. So I will explain myself later. So she like I love her and she's my friend. for the like every day almost more than two hours and at some point I see her call I'm like and not because I hate her but because I'm not just in the mood of talking to her on that day you see so I was thinking uh to myself like even in marriages and relationships you see that person again you're like not [snorts] again >> yeah and keep in mind this is someone that you're supposed to stay the rest of your life >> forever forever. ever and ever child >> kids are involved. So you grew up seeing your mom and dad together. So you want that for your kids or rather you don't want like problems single parents and stuff like that and you end up like for thick I mean through thick and thin. That's what they always say. But I feel like maybe they should change that it's forever maybe contract. >> No, >> because [laughter] at this at this point the number of breakups >> but I feel like as so the question is what's the basis of your marriage? What's the foundation of your marriage? Because I'm not married guys, okay? But I think and I know for sure if God is the foundation of your marriage in one way or another, it's going to work. >> And if purpose is what ties you guys together, no matter what happens, the purpose behind it, what the driving factor, why are we doing this? Why were we here >> in the first place? And I think that is enough to keep you going. But now most people are there for the feel for the vibe because these guys are celebrity. Let me just run on this wave of of fame. But >> behind the fame, behind you seeing Tulu on TV, there is the emotional needs. There's what makes you happy, but now you're a celebrity. Everyone sees you and they're like, so like you have a totally different life. And maybe uh when these people see you or when these people are coming, they're coming because they're in love with the TV personality and they're not they don't know that there's a person behind the scenes that there is you who just wants to be in your shot and just watch a movie all day and you know like no I want us to go out so that they can go show off with you. There are so many things behind the fame and the face that everyone sees online and on TV and I think that is one big factor >> that influences these breakups. >> Exactly. Because because we we just rush with the like the fame the beauty we don't want to get to know this person like deep down like what makes them happy. Can they get angry but does this person even cry at times? Maybe you I am a cry baby. I cry a lot. How did you guys meet? sleep over and be like vibe not knowing one night maybe for that day for that day I was on makeup I was looking pretty and it like [laughter] >> wait a minute who are you you know so all that >> know this person on and off go to them on a date and tell them you don't have money and see how they react will they pay the bill like just try this person because >> don't do that they will run away. [laughter] >> But but you know, try them. Yeah, it's true. In absent like >> not always perfect >> and the sad part is the fact that breakups happen when kids are already involved like >> which is sad. Yeah. Because >> you don't want your child to be raised by a single parent like a single mother like the kind of That's the normal exactly >> and that's how they're going to start living their lives. >> Actually, that's how a lot of us think like it's normal. you're not support you know for people who've not grown up with uh dads they feel like my mom has been doing everything forever so I can also do it alone and they don't know that that's not the right >> way to live but they feel like see I have never seen a man in my life and I've been okay so I don't think I need a man and unless you get to a point of understanding that that is not the right way to live and you need a husband and you need to get married >> then and yeah so like the way society is is bringing up these kinds of um relationships that are funny funny is the way that this person is going to grow up and you have your mom and some aunties the friends that they hang out with growing up you'll think that that's how you should live life but in reality that's not how you should live life by the end of the day I mean in a toxic relationship by the way don't Don't stay there. >> No, no, no. It's okay. >> God hates divorce. He does, but God hates divorce. I cannot divorce this man. Yeah. And for single people by because we don't have like nails. And [laughter] I saw Winfre [laughter] that's the reason right honestly speaking I do not think there's any man who finds long nails attractive. nails. What's [laughter] happening? I don't have nails, guys. [laughter] I am not I'm not in that category, please. >> But but I think uh actually this thing nails make you pretty. Exactly. At times just decide to stay without them. But that is not a reason for you to judge like bro. Okay. You're talking to me [laughter] and I am on full makeup and you're telling me are you blind or something? even here. >> So with nails it works the same way. >> Exactly. >> Yeah. So whatever nails go ahead and something else. >> She's saying that men don't like don't find that attractive. I'm not doing it for any man. I am doing it for myself. >> Speak baby. Tell them because like we are doing we we are putting on makeup for men. I am dressing up for who told you? >> Who lied to you? I am I am looking good to to make myself confident and love myself. I'm doing it for me, not for any man. I'm dressing up for a man if I'm going out on a date. It's for you. But any other time, I don't even need you to look at me or anything because I am confident in myself. I look good and that's what matters. >> Yes. >> Yeah. And the thing is how do men think? How do what do men want? Baby girl alone. >> Exactly. You know, I had a roommate in like she can't even hold blanket and she had men. So if you I don't know which kind of men you're talking about. >> Yeah. [laughter] baby girl even holding anything. Wow. >> You're like, "Okay." >> But it makes her happy. >> Yeah. That's what she loves. Yeah. And it's okay because that's what she wants to do, baby girl. So, okay. Yes. [laughter] And we are celebrating as a country because of a woman here. >> Yeah. >> Her name is Marci and she gave birth to five babies. She's from Georgia. And it was through normal delivery at VA level five hospital. >> Five. >> Five. One 2 3 four five. >> I'm trying to imagine how how her belly was >> carrying five babies. But God is such a maybe some like five of them like okay that is God is great and she's also a strong woman and um >> she should like we say like the doctors and the family should really take care of her. If giving birth to one baby the ladies feel like the end of the world. five five even how now she's going to breastfeed them but I know they are going to be ways people should support her >> you know what I'm trying to imagine is that maybe for even that one kidless But before now you'll add five plus to those ones. But exactly. Oh my goodness. A story in regards to that. Um, four kids died yesterday. Yeah, I'm just getting that information right now. And >> what what happened? >> My says to you, I don't know. Maybe we will follow up on that story and update you guys. But yeah, o that's sad. >> It is very sad. >> Yeah, we're getting five kids then God is taking away four. Yeah, >> but I feel like maybe maybe they were lacking nutrients or something cuz you know >> they look healthy. >> Yeah. I don't know what Yeah. So I think which is really like it's a blessing man. because five kids >> but right now we should pray that God strengthens her because losing four kids is not >> a simple thing. >> Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. >> Yeah. We are here celebrating and she's she's sad and she's >> um you can imagine being in labor for all that period of time and then you lose even losing one baby is so painful but now right now losing four. >> But yes, may God give you um strength. May God give her the strength because >> uh she really needs she really needs um >> she needs help. >> Wow. >> Yes. Uh okay, let's leave the sad stories aside and we pray for strength for her but we leave sad stories aside. [laughter] Another sad story came out. months people obviously have to talk online like you know what my personal and family issues I'm not going to bring them online but I see the sister here I reply I respond to that surely like why would you accuse us of not helping you at all but from what is happening here because I'm even seeing um Wesley I know these people but the reality is that the mom is the one that is um on the wrong here and this brings the aspect of black tax which is real >> that's what I wanted to say actually I think black tax is really especially for us for our African parents like feel entitled to your help like you have to help her or him immediately after college once get the job like you have to be there for your parents of which I feel like that is wrong because you also have your own life okay and you helping your parent willingly not them actually forcing you or asking you to help them yes for help once in a while but making it like it's a it's a must like your paycheck is a must like and funny enough it's not even $25 5% 60% like you have to give it 6%. We have seen people on Tik Tok or even on Instagram they complaining that and they're like is this really like your parents? I know life is hard especially back in up country life is hard but it's not that in Nairobi things are good also your child also needs that lifeactly you're paying for everything like everything that you're using yeah so um what I would say is that some parents Vizuri. >> Yeah. >> And what you're supposed to do is that Mimi, I strongly believe in the Bible verse that says children obey your parents in the Lord. >> Yeah. >> In the Lord. >> But also that is not to say that there are kids who come to Nairobi or go to places and they get money and they forget about their parents. tie that is happening. So if you're that kind of a person, change, help your parents, but help them not neglect yourself because most of the times people have gotten to a point of you are now giving everything and you're leaving yourself at zero. Especially also they really take advantage of you and by the time I realize >> you've given everything and but I feel like parents also please just understand your your kids. >> Uh my pastor once gave an example like before you you were born by these parents they were having fun. Did you ask them to come? No. So they should not force you to do things that you don't I am your mother. I gave birth to you. It's all right. But you having fun. I didn't ask to come. So the same way like I am not like it's not a must a master idea. I am supposed to do that. But don't make it seem like >> it's a must. >> It's a must. And sometimes what they don't know is that some kids end up doing some crazy stuffs because they want to raise money and help you back home because you don't have the money. They feel like they need to. It's a must cuz you've made it like it's a must. If you don't do that, I'm going to c you that point of I'm going to c you. I'm your mother. I'm going to c you if you don't do that for me. So for parents who are watching us, please stop like putting so much pressure on your ch children especially the one who are in the city whether in Mombasa, Nairobi, Kisumu like whichever city like help well and good but don't make it like it's a must cuz I feel like black tax a lot of youth pursue their dreams because instead of you building your life you're looking forward to build your parents' life or taking care of group. Mom, he is your son. Remember, this is your son, not my son. So, you're the one who's supposed to take care of your son. So, yes, it's very important that you parents um just give cut like and for the kids, for the young people, please help your parents, okay? [laughter] >> Don't get what we are not saying. What we saying is that neglect Yeah. do not neglect your parent and do what you can. God knows that you've done your best and that's what matters. will never leave the rest to God. But again, parents, please. >> Have a plan. Have you going to handle your kids? Yes. >> Not putting the burden on the first, everyone else. load masha to take you to college and >> well your responsibility as my parent you were supposed to find [laughter] >> you know it's funny that right now um >> I love my generation because we are not really um like we speaking the reality and the truth yeah because now your story oh I did this for you and now you should do it for me no M like it was your responsibility as my mom as my dad but for me it is my responsibility also but over you not over the 10 siblings that you are having fun in the game. Okay. >> Anyways we love you parents I love my mom so much and she knows that I do and I always help my mom. She's the only mom you have and she's the only woman that will ever love you >> genuinely >> forever. Like, hey, >> it's very sad. I don't want us to really dwell on this, but uh let me say this. It's very sad, especially for men, >> that you have this girlfriend that you're sending girlfriend allowance and you're not sending your mom money. >> Yeah. >> Yes. Like, >> yeah. Yeah. Those guys, those guys like baby girl in Nairobi, she's wearing that Brazilian hair while your mom back in the >> 15k. That's where the comes. You see that we talking about >> Yeah. That's where comes in. Yeah. So >> we not talking about defending you guys. >> Oh, where be very careful. And by there as we wind up that story of what's trending, have you seen that story of uh there's this content creator Malcom? I mean, he was talking about this lady. I'll confess that he did some magic. I mean, black magic like her friends because they were getting married, but she wasn't. >> She wasn't. >> And she actually says, "I'm the most beautiful of them all." Okay, >> that kind of like made me question myself like do we really have like friends like genuine friends? Can I count on you as my friend? I'm a everyone for themselves for us. Okay, my love. Okay. The story is um a lady confesses that marriages because every time that they get married before her. Okay. The other one is two and a half years. They've not gotten kids and their marriages are now headed to being destroyed. She knows the cause. She knows that she's the reason people were like relationships. But yes, the world is doomed. That's why I always tell you guys pray. Hey, only God can protect you. Only God can help you. Someone said that the first thing you need to do during your honeymoon. that yes this is an advice for you who who is getting married today [laughter] [laughter] so like the first thing you're supposed to do is pray like pray pray and God hears our prayers like that's the beautiful thing and as long as you're covered mimi I don't believe in witchcraft I know that those things are But I don't think there are things that can really scare me because I know I have God. Be the same. Like have God and pray and believe in God so much that nothing else scares or affects you. And today it's a WCW. So I feel like I just want to talk to baby girls, please. Baby girls, we have those friends. You know that this babe, she's just fake and they're still like there for them. You know, you can just tell your instincts will just tell you that this she's not the right one. So love yourself a little bit more. Yeah. If this one you feel like this relationship or this friendship is not working the number of years that you guys have been friends have been friends with for 14 years but all that are you losing yourself in the process. >> Exactly. >> Trying to say that you're trying to save a relationship because it may last for a while. >> Yeah. Or a friendship. >> Yeah. It's not worth it. >> Yeah. It's not worth it. So just love yourself a little bit more. So don't be in such places in such friendship where you even know like I'm sure this babes kind of like knew exactly kind of jealous or something cuz you can just tell a jealous friend she's a jealous friend but maybe you even end up inviting the wrong people in your friend I mean wedding just because you don't want to break the friendship. No, don't do that. I saw a a video of a lady that was celebrating her birthday and she uh surprised her friends that she was married 5 months ago >> and none of them knew. So that's that's that's the way to go. >> Just do it. >> Find your own way to deal with whatever happens. So the girls were so surprised and shocked. birthday guys I got married and they like what when >> anyways that is what worked for her. >> Exactly. >> So but at the end of the day don't be the p the person that's ruining other people's relationships or other people's lives because what's what goes around >> comes around >> comes around and karma is real >> and God God fights for his people. So don't be the one that is being fooled. Let me let me promise you. You don't want to fight against God. You don't want to be on the wrong side of God. >> Plus, for me, I feel like since she knows that she's the reason again >> it's not undone. >> What? >> Yeah. Okay. ACCORDING TO WHAT I HEAR or maybe the price is too is it's too it's too heavy to pay. But God only God can I think that is the only way out that they have. >> That's crazy. >> Yes. And so we are speaking about >> hearing not [laughter] just hearing listening. So I was I was serving on Monday in a service and so I was outside >> and um the a person came and then he asked me can you hear what pastor is saying and I told him I can hear what he's saying but I don't understand what he's saying because now today we speaking about or rather our question is be honest when you're in a conversation or maybe you just want to prove your point. You want to say I let me let me say something. Okay. [laughter] >> Yeah. So, are you really listening or you just waiting for your turn to speak? And we are speaking about or the topic is the art of listening. Yes. The art of listening. Do we really listen? Because if you listen, you're going to understand what this person is saying. But listening, hearing, but listening is where you're really keen. You're paying attention and attentive. Yes, you're paying attention to what someone is saying. So, our discussion for the day is revolving around that. And do you have a comment? Do you have an answer? Do you have anything that you want to tell us? We are on all social media platforms at Y254 channel # Y in the morning. Yes. And we're going to be getting to interact with you and maybe you can tell us be honest. That's the biggest question we ask. And the reason we're asking this is because a lot of social media reading those comments didn't even listen to the whole video. first few seconds. You know what they say, okay, make it make it like I want to get your pointational speaker. So I'm not going to listen to it. So summarize in five five sentences. >> Honestly speaking, yeah, >> I feel like we don't listen to to to understand the other person. We listen just because we want to answer deep down and then when we are just given the resp I feel like nowadays we don't even listen to to actually understand the other person we listen to answer we just listen to past time so you just need listening so I think it's a big problem by the way yeah we don't listen to understand the other And what do you think makes someone a good listener? At what point would you say that I am actually a good listener? >> When when you're just paying attention and listening to this person like without rushing them, >> you know, without like telling them okay so we should use the other route maybe I should. So there's this point or story. >> Listen to me. I just want to talk. I was once there. So >> you don't understand what I'm saying. >> We're talking about me, not you. >> Not you. I feel like that is one wrong thing that people always do. like I'm coming to you to ask for advice or rather to just speak my heart. >> Most of the times actually especially someone that's hurting you just listen to them not your advice. Yeah. Like just listen to me I'm struggling with my relationship. Wait let me tell you mine. >> [laughter] >> At your own time, not at my own time. >> Exactly. >> Look for me. Buy me some nice coffee and then tell me about your business. Today we are talking about my information or my story. So you have to listen. But why why is it so difficult >> not to interrupt? Like I think we used to like that's when the point comes through. So you're like let me drop this is how we should do things. So I feel like yeah that's the reason as to why we we can't like wait fast and I think we forgot those things. We were taught in high school English by the the art of listening how you should be a good listener. Actually there was this being a good listener but nowadays make things so we don't even pay attention and end up picking the wrong information because you don't listen careful to the first point and like oh so that is it you end up yeah we end up like judging people or understanding things in the wrong way other than how we were supposed to understand them because we don't listen. >> Yeah. >> And um when it comes to communication like cuz now listening is just a segment of communication. I feel like communication is the whole umbrella. Um do you think that someone can be a good communicator without being a good listener? >> No, they have to work hand in hand. >> They have to work hand in hand. They can't go like those two have to work in hand in hand. You have to be a good listener for you to be a good communicator or you have to be a good communicator for you also to be a good listener. So I think those two cannot be separated. >> Yeah. And that's why maybe you feel like cuz if you don't listen to me careful how you going to communicate like to me now cuz you don't even understand what I expected you to say. >> Yeah. And I think the this is a pandemic actually. >> Yeah. It's a it's a it's a thing that people should really work on especially young people. >> Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. We don't listen careful and even you you can just tell even on social media when you just see a video maybe the very first second and yeah >> before concluding things it doesn't hurt and okay I get it we are in the era of like we want things to be ch >> immediately like one second two seconds man make your things, summarize your stuff and and leave. But yeah, we have to understand that for you to just be able to communicate well, for you to fit well in the society, you have to understand other people and don't really understand other people also. If you you don't want to listen to them, if you don't want to give them time to explain themsel or you don't want to communicate well. So I feel like it's a it's a big problem for us young people. Yeah. Now when we think about uh communicating there's the aspect of phones. I realize that you even go to your to the washroom with your phone like that's how addicted people are to their phones. Do you think that when you're on your phone and someone is talking to you that is you being disrespectful? It's a sign of disrespect. >> Exactly. Cuz for me, first of all, I just go through my phone. >> Yeah. >> Have you Have you ever been on a date? >> Have you ever been on a date and you're like check? [laughter] >> Just be honest. Have you never like first sign to show you that bro? >> Because if you're interesting, this person even keeps their phone away to pay attention to you. So, I think uh it's a tip. You're helping them. If you see someone has started taking their phone, sorry, >> you're not making sense. [laughter] >> You need to work on yourself. But I get it also for I wouldn't feel good. By the way, I'm talking to you and we were supposed to have a meeting and then you're not even listening to me or you're pretending you can multitask. >> You can't ask. Yeah. >> How you going to multitask? >> Yeah. >> You end up giving me like uncooked answers because >> And if I ask you what I've said, you can't even tell me what I've said. >> Exactly. >> Yeah. Which is crazy. >> And I think this is something that we we also we young people like young people, we are struggling with this. We were we were busy like on our phones even on meetings we may attend conference someone may attend like a summit or something helpful and then you're busy scrolling you're not even >> you're not even listening to what that that person is saying you know when we used to go um as reporters in the field looked after news it is very important that you get to listen to what that person is saying because people get different things so what is going to catch your attention is different from what is going to catch my attention all All of us need different stories. All of us need different headlines. And it was one thing to be very, very, very attentive. So right now, I wonder how you attend a conference and all you have is photos and selfies with the person that was speaking, the main speaker, and you have nothing to tell. Like you can't even tell them, hey, wow, what you said about this actually makes sense cuz you are not even listening. All you want is a selfie. We see. But then after that, what do you get out of it? Because >> we have to to to be very attentive and um like I said last week, I've seen someone in the morning 5 a.m. Tik Tok and it's an old person. I'm looking at them. I'm like, I thought it's just young people that are um addicted to Tik Tok and everything, but bro, >> it's cut it's cut across nowadays. Like even the older people are struggling with that, too. But I feel like it's really bad because right now we are missing the like to like us to like human like physical talking without letting the internet or rather social media interfere our conversations because I feel like social media like everywhere I don't want to feel you. I don't want to listen to you. I just want to focus on social media. So when I'm going a place instead of socializing and getting these people like I feel at times um as an interviewer I would ask one question that I know very many people would fail at an So, I'll ask you one question. What's the name of the person that was seated next to you? And most people wouldn't even know >> unless it's someone you came with. >> Most people wouldn't even know because they don't even say hi to each other. We don't even say hi to each other. I just come sit my phone then. I know people say hi when they realize that maybe you are a boss, you had a position or you were someone and that's that's you sucking up and that's not the real you. The real you is the person that that's the real you. Yes. And it's high time that we really work on ourselves because let's let's learn to communicate or listen to you even see at times when you're in the bus >> you're talking to someone and they're looking at you in a very weird way and it's crazy. You're even saying hi. Hi. They're looking at you like what do you want? >> When you're saying hi someone is like you want to steal from me right now. I was just saying hi. Nothing much. respond and you're like, "Okay, it was just a greeting. It's not like I was saying anything else, but um it's high time that you get to just be good communicators with people." Do you think that not listening or rather not being a good listener is affecting relationships and friendships? >> Definitely. That's what we are seeing with these breakups that are happening right now because we don't want to listen to each other. M >> we don't want to like get to understand one another and understanding one another is like when you listen to someone else >> and listening to this person talk. So we don't we don't even give room to that. We to the vibe to the vibe. Yes. We don't even listen. So how do you expect this friendship to work if we [clears throat] have not cemented it with like that first conversation of us getting to understand each other or even the family like your mom or your dad like no longer talks to you guys like there's that communication like he's not even a good listener. So definitely >> the man in the house definitely how is that family going to like be a good family? So I feel like in in aribu even friendship family. So I think first of all the when it comes to friendship not even friendship like relationship there is that first conversation that you guys always must have that conversation but you can have that conversation and not listening to your partner. So it's also lead to the breakup. So yeah I think this will affect your family your your friendship your relationship. Just be a good listener. Yeah, it does affect. >> Yeah. >> Yeah. Have you ever like lost a friend because you didn't like listen to them? >> Yeah. Yeah. Most of the times, yes. Because like for example, they they did something >> and you're there feeling like it was wrong, but they're trying to explain to you why they did that, but like you don't want to understand them. And at some point, you know, and they just have to leave. But when you sit down with yourself and think about it, you realize, by the way, I should have listened to them or by the way they were hurting or they had a reason as to why they did what they did. But at times you find that it's already too late. >> Yeah. >> So, because you know, not listening is one thing that leads to people getting depressed cuz you never understand them. So so they start keeping things to to themselves and that's the first uh ingredient that adds to the aspect of depression. Yes. Because now like they know no one understands even if I try telling them nobody's going to hear >> especially like speaking of that like in the current generation that we are in let me die with my own problems because nobody's going to listen to me and even if they're going to listen nobody's going to even help or offer solution. So you end up >> especially with the online people it's funny but at the end of the day like why you guys you you really don't believe this is happening to me and he was trying to open up to see if anyone can help but in turn you guys are there laughing at you start having funny comments and at the end of the day you are trying to communicate and nobody's listening to you. >> Yeah. I feel like listening is the foundation uh of like being a good communicator. So if you cannot listen well then you can't communicate well and if you cannot communicate well then you can't make that friendship equip poor or relationship equal poor and that's the end of like everything and you realize that you don't even have friends anymore or rather like your circle you are with them but you're not with them like this but you're not here >> literally because you don't know how to communicate well or we don't know how to listen well >> you can relate with them >> yeah you can't relate with them so I feel like yeah communication I mean listening and communicating those go those two goes hand in hand so yeah those two things are a must like you have to improve or to work on them you can learn it's never too late you can learn how to be a good listener you can learn how to be a good communicator especially even in relationships before you guys go separate ways kindly try to listen to each other because sometimes I feel Like a lot of relationship also do end because those couples or partners don't listen to one another or don't like give each other that time like what makes you happy as my wife or what makes you happy as my husband? They don't do >> and what do you want when you're angry? >> Do you want me to listen to you? Do you want me to sit there and be quiet? Do you want me to speak? What do you want? uh and this you're going to get this if you're attentive enough to understand that person but if you don't get to a point of understanding them every time you're going to react in a very different way and that's why you find most of the times with someone else who understands them someone else who knows what they need at a specific and at a given time. >> Yeah. So, by the way, we want to know, do you listen to just because you want to answer? >> How would you rate yourself in a scale of 1 to 10? >> Yeah. Are you a good listener or you're just there? >> Yes. And you're going to find us on all social media platforms at Y254 channel in the morning. Yes. And we are going to be very excited to get to read your comments, but for now, we're going to take a short break and um Before we do that, let me give Tunu a moment um your parting shot in regards to this discussion about listening. >> Wow. As I've just said, I think listening is the foundation of being a good communicator. So, if you cannot listen, then you're not a good communicator. So, you have to learn that art of being a good listener. It doesn't cost you anything by the way. Coming to think of it, I could cost anything. Imagine too. I could cost anything too. Okay. And that thing that thing is so bad by the way cuz sometimes you kind of like you can make your someone feel like so I have nothing to tell them. No, be a good listener. And also just because someone is maybe below you in terms of age in terms of career doesn't mean that they can't offer something helpful. So learn to be a good listener not because this person has something to offer in return because sometimes you realize that you're not from maybe a certain position or maybe feel like or she feels like his or her mind. No. So we should learn to listen to people whether or not we should just learn to just give them time. Let them let people talk. Let people express themselves. There's always something that you learn from them whether one or two things. So yeah we should we should do that. And also for you to be a good listener remember you have to be a good listener. So I mean for you to be a good communicator you have to be a good listener. For you to be a good listener you have to be a good communicator. So those two goes hand in hand. You can't separate them. Yeah. >> All right. >> That's what I feel. >> Where can we find you online? >> Okay. Instagram. Yeah. So that's where you can find me and you can also keep interacting with us on our social media pages. Yeah. And you amazing. So uh we for me uh what I would say is that uh just to add on what you've said it's very important that we get to listen and listen to understand what is this person saying and most of the times listening goes beyond what you hear. It goes beyond you understanding this person. It goes beyond you getting to >> to know why. The why behind this reaction the why behind what they are saying. the why behind how they are taking everything because most of the times we say things you ask me are you okay but everything is screaming that I'm not okay so you shouldn't say no like think about it like this person but are they really okay because we always stop at but you saw everything around them was saying from how they were looking their face from the cheers they had are Are you okay? Yes, I'm okay. And they're crying like, yeah, just just be very attentive and be very intentional. If you're asking someone if they're okay, actually mean it. Don't just ask for the sake of asking for us to see that you're asking. I think that's all I would tell you in regards to that. You're going to find me on all my social media platforms at Eliza Kimmani, your TV host of the year. And we're taking a very short break to Mambona Basha. Anyways, yes, please do not go anywhere. We are coming back.