Video summary
Ginger Breedlove, a pioneering figure in midwifery and former president of the American College of Nurse Midwives, delivered a closing keynote focused on navigating conflict as a catalyst for professional change. Drawing from her extensive experience spanning over 45 years, she argued that while no practice setting is perfect, conflicts arising from war, collegiality issues, or the push for evidence-based care are inevitable triggers for necessary evolution. Breedlove emphasized that rather than avoiding these tensions, midwives must embrace conflict as their most powerful tool for driving change. She highlighted three critical scenarios facing the profession today: clinical burnout due to excessive work hours without compensation, institutional policies that restrict evidence-based practices like nitrous oxide or water birth, and regulatory confusion that undermines the financial viability and legal recognition of midwifery.
To address these challenges, Breedlove introduced a negotiation framework based on the work of renowned anthropologist William Ury, urging midwives to move from destructive arguments to constructive dialogue. She advised practitioners to depersonalize conflicts by focusing on issues rather than individuals, to utilize strategies like silence and mirroring to deepen understanding, and to avoid triangulating conversations with third parties. A central theme was the importance of preparing meaningful data that combines clinical outcomes with compelling stories, as narratives often move people more effectively than statistics alone. Breedlove also stressed the need to shift from rigid positions to underlying interests, aiming to find win-win solutions that transform adversaries into partners by creating a "golden bridge" that allows opposing parties to save face while achieving mutual goals.
The presentation further explored the necessity of financial literacy within midwifery practices, revealing that many providers are unaware of their actual revenue and profit margins despite being significant revenue generators. Breedlove explained that without access to fiscal data, midwives cannot build a business case for their worth, leading to economic devaluation and burnout. She encouraged practitioners to demand this information as a federal right if billing under their own NPI and to use predictive modeling to anticipate consequences like staff turnover when working unsustainable hours. By involving the broader community in decision-making and staying engaged even when facing resistance, midwives can sustain their practices and advocate for policies that support patient autonomy and provider well-being.
In conclusion, Breedlove called for a collective mobilization of midwifery voices to fight for change through strategic negotiation and internal preparation. She promoted the concept of going to the "balcony" to view conflicts objectively and maintaining a "yes-no-yes" structure in conversations that expresses values, sets boundaries, and proposes alternatives. Her message was one of empowerment, reminding midwives that their confidence should not depend on any single deal but rather on their internal readiness and ability to articulate their purpose. By adopting these negotiation skills and fostering a culture of deep listening, the profession can overcome barriers, reduce attrition rates, and ensure sustainable, high-quality care for families in an increasingly complex healthcare landscape.
Read the full video transcript
And now I have the great pleasure to
introduce our closing keynote note
speaker um Ginger Brid Breedlove who is
a true midwiffery pioneer and innovator.
Among her many accomplishments is as the
past president of the American College
of Nurse Midwives
and co-founder of the first licensed
freestanding birthing center in Topeka,
Kansas back in the late 70s, the first
hospital-based midrefree service in
Kansas City in the early 90s.
um and the founder and director of
University of Kansas graduate nurse
midwifery program. She's widely
published in journals and publication um
of speak much in demand speaker a
principal investigator for over $5
million in research funds. She is a
co-founder of um March for Moms with Dr.
Neil Shaw and the found and its founding
president. Um she now has founded and
runs the US consulting firm Grow
Midwives LI LLC to um scale and sustain
midwiffery. She is a a true promoter and
supporter of midwiffery and also an
educator. Um I had the pleasure of
teaching with her at Shannondoa
University nurse midwiffery program for
a number of years. Um she's also an
author. She um editor and launched a
best-selling book for new parents titled
Nobody Told Me About That which is into
its second edition. and she's also a um
consultant
and she learned skills at negotiation
and management at the Harvard School of
Business Mastery Certificate program in
2023.
So with that, I will turn it over to
you, Ginger.
>> Thank you very much. Uh Katherine, can
you hear me?
I can hear you and you're spotlighted on
the side so everything is good to go.
>> Perfect. Perfect. Well, first of all, uh
it's it's a true honor to be here today.
Over the years, I have uh tuned in to
virtual International Day of the
Midwife. And I just want to say happy um
happy International Day of the Midwife
to everyone who's here with me this
afternoon. A exactly 10 years ago today,
I was in Nigeria as president of the
American College of Nurse Midwives
celebrating with Nigerian midwives on
this special occasion and was able to
witness over a week the incredible work
uh they were doing uh for life
sustaining skills of moms and babies.
So, it's it's kind of a a full circle
moment in many ways. I live in Kansas,
uh, as you may have noted from the
introduction, but I'm sitting in
Washington DC, uh, getting ready to help
participate in a two-day convening of
Maryland, Virginia, and the District of
Columbia as the midwives have come
together to try to activate what we call
little P and big P, uh, political issues
and policy issues to to really fight for
change, which is what today's a little
bit about. But I want to I want to just
start by saying I heard the opening
keynote uh yesterday afternoon by
Daniela who discussed a lot of resources
that are crucial for midwives to know
are available and to utilize them in the
settings that they practice in. I also
listened uh to Selene today talk about
linking the midwiffery spirit to
professionalism
and it it sort of ties in to what I want
to address today is how we connect our
passion which which I would call our
heart. I' I've been a midwife over 45
years with sort of the mental savvy that
we need to begin to build to promote
change. And I just listened to Alice. I
could have listened to her all
afternoon. I missed the last part of her
presentation sharing the historical
analysis of Hilda Sutton, a Cardiff
midwife who went through uh decades of
midwiffery service and talking about how
the condition she worked in and how she
transitioned um helping with really the
National Health Service in England get
established. And all that to say
that the changes that we face are often
triggered by conflict. Whether it's the
conflict of war, which was being talked
about a little bit, whether it's the
conflict of um collegiality in our
practice, the conflict of wanting to add
evidence-based care to the families that
we care for. And um it's not easy. There
is no practice that I've ever worked in
that is perfect. There is no team that
is perfect. There is no setting that is
perfect. And really begin to realize how
we are the folks who need to promote the
action and that really embracing
conflict and I'll say it again,
embracing conflict is your best tool for
change.
So, that's what we're going to talk
about. I think I'm supposed to leave
about 20 minutes for questions and
answers. We'll see how that how that
plays out. But, there are three
scenarios that I'm going to give to you.
These are all actual uh clients that
I've worked with over the years. And
we're going to talk about how these may
be relevant or gerine in some way to the
practices that you work in. Because what
the focus is here is is what do we do
about these barriers? How can we
mobilize our midwifrey collective voices
toward a call for action?
Next slide.
So the first scenario wh we went we went
too fast there.
The f wh wrong way.
That's okay. We can we can do this. The
first is about clinical practice and
burnout. Um,
wh somebody's advancing here a little
too quick.
Let's see if we can get the rhythm of it
better. There we go.
>> All right.
>> All right. This is an established group
of six midwives working in a hospital
that average a 55hour work week. In the
United States, most people think a
full-time job is a 40hour work week.
They worked along six physicians and
following the departure of two of them
in that large practice, the
administration mandated that they were
going to move them to a 65-hour work
week to help cover the gaps in patient
care. So, let's talk about the conflict.
There was no corresponding increase in
their salary or benefits. They were
simply told, "Do it. That's what we do
for each other. The patients need the
care and it's your responsibility."
The context for the midwives was they
had not been given a raise for over two
years and now they were being asked to
work even more. And the concern you can
imagine is workforce sustainability.
How does that continue on in a way that
doesn't lead to provider burnout? And as
we know uh patient safety risks begin to
elevate as our workforce begins to
become exhausted. Next slide.
The second scenario is about
institutional policy and autonomy. And
many of us in the US and I think
probably around the globe listening to
one of the presentations I heard are in
situations where we know there's
evidence-based care recommendations, but
our institutions will not allow them,
including nitrous oxide, which Hilda
Sutton used in the home back in the
1900s. intermittent fetal monitoring
instead of continuous EFM and offering
water birth in institutions, not just
water immersion in labor. What's the
conflict here in this particular
practice? Despite the support of their
chief physician, the anesthesia
department and many of the other
physicians in the department remained
vehemently opposed. What's the
consequences? Rigid rules often drive
the families towards another hospital
setting or perhaps a community birth
setting. And we are seeing a rise in
free birth in our country. And a key
concern could be loss of hospital market
share. Always think about the hospital
and the institution is following the
money and truly the restriction of
patient choice and autonomy with
evidence-based recommendations. Next
slide.
And the third scenario is about
professional politics and regulation.
And we're facing this conversation here
in the DC, Maryland, Virginia
contingency that I'll be at over the
next two days.
A midwiffrey practice in any region or
any country or even within a state that
lacks uniform definition can cause
inherent challenges. The conflict is
that stakeholders of all types,
families, payers, governmental
organizations, licensing entities are
confused by the different types of
midwives that are practicing. The
consequences can lead to title ambiguity
which diminishes the understanding of
the role. It can create barriers to the
scope of practice. It can influence
funding sources and create an amount of
barriers that are really hard to imagine
unless you're trying to practice through
it. And the key concern then becomes the
financial viability of the profession
and the legal recognition of the
profession. Next slide.
Wh we're going too fast, guys. I I don't
know how to help you here because I
don't have control. But can we go back?
So the themes of these three scenarios
evolve
to three key pillars. I I'll just say it
that way.
Economic devaluation is significant. The
assumption that midwives in that first
scenario can work excessive extra hours
for free suggests that their time is
seen as less valuable than other
providers that are paid. Whether that's
the physicians or the nurses that are
employed. Clinical gatekeeping where
hospital departments or institutions
serve as gatekeepers restrict midwives
from full scope practice
and legislatively and legally without a
clear identity of a midwife. We become
vulnerable to who controls the funding,
who allows certain things to happen
within a state and confusion among the
public.
So on the next slide you're going going
to see a book that I highly encourage
you to think about purchasing.
Next slide. Uh there is an anthropology
professor whose name is William Yuri. He
is without a doubt the most
worldrenowned global negotiator alive
today. His background is anthropology,
but his work with the Harvard School of
Law and School of Business has made him
the negotiator that most presidents of
the United States and globally have ever
used, including successfully negotiating
peace between North Korea and the United
States. He's negotiated middle peace
talks. He's done more than anyone could
imagine unless you learn about him. And
from his perspective as an
anthropologist and the study of human
behavior, he has created steps that I
believe midwives need to learn and begin
to articulate to use our voice to
persuade others. And that's where we're
going to go next is what are some of
these steps that I believe needs to be
as highly elevated as our prowess as
practitioners. So what is possible? Next
slide.
Five. Wh we're going too fast. That just
must be a super sensitive um super
sensitive arrow here, guys.
>> Ally,
>> can we go back?
>> There are
>> Thank you.
>> Um there we go. Here they are. uh
addressing organizational conflict. And
what that means is to not walk away from
it, to acknowledge the conflict exists
and instead of human nature trying to
sort of
have a step away from the tension and
the emotional energy and the anxiety
that conflict brings up to embrace it.
Once you do that, you have to begin to
organize meaningful data, come up with
possible solutions, think about a bridge
to common ground, and stay engaged with
the other party or parties until you
achieve multiple mutually favorable
outcomes. So, we're going to talk about
each one of these.
Let's see if we can move it to just the
next one, which is organizational
conflict. I know you probably understand
a lot of these concepts, but I think
it's really important sometimes in the
moment of frustration, anxiety, anger
that we really realize this issue isn't
between Katherine and I. You have to
depersonalize the conflict. It's about
the issue. It's not about the people.
One of the things my husband um who's
helped me really focus on a lot who who
is an attorney and a mediator is always
think about the position of the opposing
party. What might be the plan they
create against your argument?
What could be a counter plan to their
response? So you're always thinking two
heads a step of what you're thinking,
what the counterparty might be thinking,
and how to respond to that counter. It's
really important to avoid triangulating
conversations
because when you're not talking
birectionally,
you're getting the biases or the
translation among a third party. So
really having the conversations direct
and not third party is essential. And
sometimes that's very hard for midwives
to do to get to the actual people who
are the conversation uh decision makers.
I love this phrase, listen then listen
deeper.
There's something always beyond what you
hear the first time. And there's a
couple strategies he talks about. One in
particular is very easy to do called
silence. Just be silent. You will be
surprised how people fill that space
very quickly. And the other's called
mirroring. So if Katherine says, "I just
think it's ridiculous." Then I would
say, "It's ridiculous." and she'd go,
"Yeah, it's ridiculous." And I'd say,
"It's ridiculous." When you mirror that
conversation three or four times, the
person you're talking to then begins to
give you more depth rather than creating
anger. You're just reframing what
they're saying. It's also important to
look into the why. What is your why? Why
are you moving this forward? And why do
you think they're taking the position
that they're taking?
taking yourself out of the emotionalism
and really thinking about the purpose of
why this conversation's even happening.
And the last is to move from destructive
to constructive conversations.
It's okay to say stop. You know, I think
we need to stop. This conversation isn't
helping us. Can we take a pause, maybe
step out of the room five or t minutes
and come back and be more constructive
about how we're speaking to one another?
Let's move to the next slide.
The next principle is preparing
meaningful data. I've spent years in
high school and college in debate and
it's the best thing that I think rounded
me in midwiffrey. How do you how do you
think about gathering the evidence to
make your argument?
We need to come clearly prepared to
articulate clinical outcomes. At least
in our country, it doesn't seem like
outcomes means as much as money. It's
like follow the money is the saying in
our country, but clinical outcomes are
important. Creating a list of shared
goals is important. Finding
evidence-based professional documents
from every professional society in your
country is important to demonstrate that
you're looking at multiple lenses.
Synthesizing peer-reviewed articles and
providing them in the context of your
presentation. This next one I think is
really valuable because many of us in
the research world tend to be
qualitative or quantitative. But in
reality, when you're trying to speak to
change, numbers might provide logic, but
stories provide the urgency. And in my
time in advocating and uh spending time
in Washington DC or my state legislative
body, the stories seem to move people
more than the statistics.
And the last one is to think about
predictive model thinking for that first
example of the midwives that were being
asked to work more. Here's an example.
If we continue at 65 hours per week,
there's a prediction that 50% of the
staff over of the staff will turn over
will leave within six months. And then
what might be the responses to that?
Next slide.
designing possible solutions.
These all are are really, I think,
important to finding the shared goals or
the win-win. So, how do you separate
inventing from deciding? Every idea on
the table should be brought forward
without criticism to generate as many
ideas as possible before even starting
to articulate what might be the best one
on both sides. Get everything out on the
table. Nothing is nothing is improper.
Shifting from a position to interest.
Positions are what people say they want.
Interests are why they want it.
You want to understand the why. What is
the underlying issue about the posturing
of the opposing parties? Because the
goal is to find a win-win. You want to
find mutual gain here. You want to turn
your adversary into your partner to
solve the problem. And there are ways to
do that. Dovetailing different
interests. Solutions are not found
because people are the same.
But because they value things
differently,
one party might care more about cost
while the other cares more about
autonomy. So how can those fit together,
especially in that first scenario that
we were talking about? Next slide.
One of the things Yuri really stresses
and it's probably his most famous
concept is to create a golden bridge.
Instead of pushing someone towards your
position, which only creates them to
push back, you meet more resistance, you
want to make it as easy as possible for
them to say yes. And one of the ways to
do that is to swarm the community. And
what that concept means is that any
conflict does not involve a twoperson
relationship or two parties. There are
always people around the issue that are
influenced by the outcome and the
decisions that are made. other staff,
people who are involved in
reimbursement, people that you are
caring for, nurses on the unit, they are
the community. And the community's voice
is quite powerful when you bring them
into this conversation. You also want to
help people save face, right? It is okay
to frame the victory as an evolution of
your opposing party's idea. In fact,
it's a great strategy so that there's a
handshake at the end and you walk away
satisfied and they think they're the
winner.
It's also important to involve people as
much as possible in that in that
the solution was from their advice,
right? That's a little bit different
than saving face. How would you handle
the safety concerns if we're going to
pilot nitrous oxide in this program? Are
there ways and people we need to talk to
that I haven't thought of? So, the goal
here is to keep them engaged in this
bridging conversation so you're not cut
off with a no. That's the ultimate goal.
The longer that you're in negotiation,
the longer you're likely to get to yes.
Next slide.
So, here are three possible bridges from
the scenarios that we started with. the
practice hour scenario of the midwives
working 60s some hours a week instead of
paying them more versus working less.
What about brainstorming or dovetailing
options such as a flexible schedule,
remote charting time, hiring predium or
part-time staff to come in and help them
during weekends or nights or peak hours.
That is a way of beginning the
conversation with possible solutions.
What about the water birth policy? move
from the position of no water birth to
the conversation of safety issues for
options for people to have a variety of
protocols that might be something they
want within the setting that's never had
that you've never had before. So instead
of answering the question about water
birth, you create a safety protocol task
force that may talk about issues far
beyond water birth. And the last one is
politics. Something we're going to talk
about for the next two days here in DC.
The types of midwives in our country and
the pathways to education is quite
complex. And I know we're not unique
globally. But what does these types of
midwives mean for patient access and
improved outcomes? In this scenario,
what could be billing codes and
credentiing processes and state laws
that could be rewritten and redesigned
so that midwiffrey could be an option
for more people that is sustainable.
Next slide.
So, how do you stay engaged in
negotiation to the outcome? You go to
the balcony. Literally imagine yourself
going to the balcony and looking down.
Look down on yourself, your team, and
the opposing party objectively.
Think about your emotions. What do you
see in their posture? What are the
tactics that are being
promoted to diminish you, to discourage
you, to intimidate you, and just look
from above as what is going on here?
Because there is a goal you want to
achieve, and you have to avoid the drama
to do that. You'll almost have to
compartmentalize
all of that stuff in order to stay
focused on the goal and to stay engaged.
And the other is step to their side. Do
the opposite of what the other party
expects. Instead of instead of arguing
with them, acknowledge their concerns.
Find small points to achieve a climate
of orness rather than either or.
So finding voice in midwayfree conflict.
True confidence in negotiation comes
from your internal preparation before
you ever ever have your first
conversation with the other party. All
of those things that were outlined above
need to seriously be thought about. What
are your own practice needs and fears?
Personally, as a group of midwives,
as if you were a third party, we've
talked to many midwife practice groups
where all the midwives weren't ready to
approach a difficult conversation
because of fear of losing their
livelihood and they're covering their
family with their job and their health
insurance. How does that impact the
conversation?
And the last one William Yuri talks
about is the BATNA.
How do you make a commitment that your
happiness and self-worth do not depend
on this deal? What is your best
alternative to the negotiated agreement?
Is it you're going to walk away? Is it
you're going to give them an eitheror?
Is it that you're going to give them
your minimum line in the sand? What is
it? If you haven't created the option
for whatif, then desperation is going to
interfere with your negotiation prowess
and it's going to subject your
confidence to a lot of vulnerability.
Next slide.
Courage comes from the ability to stay
calm under fire. I think we've all
experienced that in our midwifrey
careers. and I practiced 25 years of
full scope practice in a freestanding
birthing center. We did home birth. I've
worked in a tertiary care center. We all
know what it's like to be under fire in
the birth room. Being under fire in
difficult conversations is not as easy
for us to navigate. and going to the
balcony often is what will calm us down
to sort of rethink our approach
and to be more strategic about those
conversations we choose to have. The
recommendation is a yes no yes
structure. Yes, express your underlying
needs and values or you will always
harbor them in your place of employment.
No means set a firm boundary on your
values. you're not going to move from
them or you're going to compromise. And
yes, propose an alternative and a way
forward and be willing to engage in the
long run because there are consequences
to not speaking up. And what we're
seeing happen in our country is a high
attrition of our midwives in less than
five years from burnout, undervalue, not
being paid, not being acknowledged, and
they're ready to move move on to another
profession. Next slide.
Again, here's a reference of the book
I'm uh talking to you about, possible,
how we survive and thrive in an age of
conflict. William Yuri has five authored
books, multiple podcasts, TED talks, and
his website is there.
Next slide. There's contact information
if you'd like to reach out to me. Next
slide.
We have a podcast that we launched in
January. My colleague and I have called
it the possiblest midwives which is
really the framework that William Yuri
works from and you can find us on a
variety of um platforms in the United
States.
Next slide.
I think the last thing I wanted to
mention that's not there is we're
actually having a conference in July uh
that is virtual. There is no limit to
registration and William Yuri will be
the keynote presenter at our conference.
>> So, Katherine, I'm going to stop there.
>> Well, um we we don't need to stop. We
just need to engage our participants and
um see what's in the chat and ask any
questions or comments that people may
have. Yeah.
>> Um, Seline is referring to the quote
that actually you had in your
presentation, Seline. Out beyond ideas
of wrongdoing and right doing, there is
a field. I'll meet you there.
>> There. Absolutely.
>> What a wonderful quote.
>> Yeah. Absolutely.
>> The fact that that you're willing to
meet someone there is the key to that
quote. Um, it's it's very difficult when
we feel disempowered to find our
control. And when we lose control, we
fall into uh despair, helplessness,
hopelessness, um anxiety, and tend to
run away. So my hope is to give you
tools to regain that control
uh and to know that you have every right
to speak out.
>> Right. Well, car Carol wants to know a
little bit more about what this
conference is that you're speaking
about.
>> Sure. Um, if you go on the Grow Midwives
website, you will find information about
the conference. July, it's in July. I
don't want to give the wrong date. I
think it's the 23rd. It's all day on a
Thursday. Uh, a virtual conference
focused on the business and leadership
savvy of midwives. uh we do not have
clinical topics in this uh in this uh
CME event but we have phenomenal
national speakers uh who will be
present.
>> Great. Thank you. Um Linda in Scotland
comments that nitrous oxide has been
used by midwives forever in the UK both
at home and in hospital.
>> Yes, we know it's quite a challenge in
the US.
>> Right. and Jay Kaplan u I think she's
referring to different types of midwives
in that confusion is in many ways
>> part particular pe pe pe pe pe pe pe pe
pe pe pe pe pe pe pe pe pe pe pe pe
peculiar or particular to the US
>> although other countries have direct
entry midwifery and nurse then midwife
paths but we have a lot of paths here
and it does create confusion for the
public.
All right. And um Jay Kaplan also
comments, "Low volume rural practices.
Midwives easily work that many hours and
more, referring to a 65hour work week."
>> Um it it is a challenge. It's not only
midwives that are leaving, but a lot of
physicians are are giving up abstetrics,
especially if they've been in practice a
while. Um, and a lot of our rural
hospitals are closing because we can't
find uh maternity care providers,
>> right? Yes. And um and that brings up
another point that Jay Kaplan is making
or question. Um, Ginger, she'd like you
to say a few words about when hospitals
decide to pay consultants to come in and
fix the financial mess the place is in
and how this affects midwives OB
services
>> and what can midwives do when the
consultant is not midwife favorable?
>> Yeah, isn't isn't that a great question?
It's actually part of my presentation
tomorrow. Uh is the institutional
barriers and how midwives in our country
seem to not have readily available
fiscal information. Meaning they don't
know what their accounts charged are.
They don't know what their accounts
received are. They don't know what their
work units are, which is terminology
wvus in our country. And when midwives
do not have access to this information,
they cannot create the business case for
their fiscal worth. And that is the key
conversation. It's not patient
experience. They know hands over heels
with evidence we have better outcomes.
The fiscal denominator is the issue. And
many many times I would say some
opportunities step one is to demand the
fiscal information. If they're billing
under your NPI, you have a federal right
to get that information. And if it's
denied, that's a problem. So, you have
to gather that fiscal data and analyze
it and be able to counter
what they're saying with what you know
to be true. In every group we have
worked with in every setting you can
possibly imagine a full scope full-time
practicing midwife in the United States
is charging about a million200,000
a year.
>> Wow.
>> And almost every midwife we've talked to
has no idea that's what they're
charging. Now there's a lot of more
conversations that go into actual
accounts received and then what's the
cost for you to work there. But in the
end, when we do these performers,
midwives are averaging a profit margin
of $300,000
per midwife. So if you have a practice
of 10 midwives,
do the math.
Midwives are revenue generators, but
they rarely know how to describe it or
help others understand it. And that is a
significant issue in our country. We
don't have free health in healthcare in
the United States. It's totally in uh an
industry built on profit which is
destroying our health care but it's also
destroying our profession.
>> Yes, agreed. Um Fatima has a comment
about the statement she loves the
statement listen and listen deeper. This
can bring a lot of change in our
profession. Not just listen and act but
listen deeper before you act.
>> Yeah. You know, where I I pulled that a
little from was a nurse midwife whose
name is Walia Early that works in
Florida who I knew for a few years when
I worked with her and we interviewed her
on our podcast during Black History
Month in February. And while Leah shared
a lot about racism in maternity care in
our country and specifically related to
midwifery and families and one of the
things Wahi really shared in a way that
resonated with me is it's one thing to
say midw midwives listen to women like I
think that's the tagline still in the US
but we need to go beyond that to listen
beyond that and to really be able to
provide provide an environment that's
conducive to the deeper story.
And when you're in conflict, you rarely
know the entire story in the first
encounter. It takes a couple exchanges
to develop some kind of reciprocity in
the conversation, trust, respect, where
are we going in this conversation to
begin to really listen to the next layer
of why, right? Why is this the way it
is? Why is this a barrier? And is there
a pathway forward
where we can begin the conversation? You
might not find full resolution, but
staying engaged in conversation is
critical. Um, and you got to get past
the first one or two.