2.5M Q&A - Naval Ravikant, Quitting Alcohol & Having Kids

what's happening people welcome back to the show it is a 2.5 million subscriber Q&A episode and this one is I guess a bit more special because 250k was the number of Subs I had when I moved out to America two and a half years ago and this is 10 times that which feels like a a cool milestone in two and a half years uh it's been a lot of work to get here and a bit of Sanity lost I guess along the way but um very worthwhile and it feels good you know every time that I do one of these I try not to get too soppy about support and and and all the shares and the likes and the nice messages and all the rest of it but I really do appreciate it more than I can ever say so thank you as usual I ask for questions from YouTube community and Twitter and Instagram and there were way more than I'm going to be able to get through so let's get into it Chris kavar you've talked about the importance of getting more comfortable with asking critical questions and how difficult it can be has this given you some appreci ation for traditional journalism and confrontational style interviews yes massively looking at uh Kathy Newman or Helen Lewis against Peterson uh every conversation Douglas Murray is ever involved in uh you know like Piers Morgan Chen Yuga like these people I don't know it's it's so to be able to have that level of what kind of feels a bit like vitriol it it certainly seems like aggression but then it's sort of controlled and then people walk away at the I mean do they shake hands do you shake hands did Jordan Peterson and Helen Lewis shake hands after they finished that up I don't know uh but yeah it's a real skill set um debating being around Alex o Conor being friends with him and seeing how going for dinner with him can be a [ __ ] nightmare because he just wants to debate everything uh so yeah hugely given me a different appreciation it's a a skill set that being said certain things come to certain people more easily uh for me asking sort of probing questions and chasing down random thought patterns little Curiosities comes very easily I'm sure there's some confrontational style journalists that go God it would be great if I could sort of continue to pursue a particular question more effectively like that but I can argue very very easily so everyone's got their different skill sets and I guess I'm just trying to uh fill in the weaknesses of mine wherever I can Kyle Pereira 5190 what would you say to the people who said you won't make it um I I think it's even sadder than that it would make for a very romantic story for me to say that there was people who doubted that things were going to work but I actually think that no one was paying attention or even cared like so few people have genuine enemies out there there's people who are have this sort of generalized cynicism about the world and that's not about you that's just about their perspective of how all risks or opportunities in life should be perceived uh I don't think really anyone said that I wasn't going to make it they just weren't they didn't care at all and still probably don't you know they're still probably living whatever totally Blissful life they've got and who even says that I've made it but uh yeah no one did and um I got rid of the chip on my shoulder I think about what happened to me in school and being an out instead of being bullied and stuff like that I got rid of that within the last I don't know 5 years or so and uh I much prefer uh not being driven by that stuff and yeah I honestly don't think that anybody even paid attention when I started doing this thing I know that for a fact the meder what is the best way to support your content monetarily I have Spotify Audible and YouTube I know streaming and payment are weird and I want to make sure I'm supporting the creators I benefit from the best way I can um if you want to support the show just subscribe it to it and share it with friends like that's honestly the best thing I don't ask we had we played around with patreon once we played around with locals once and I don't know it just didn't feel right it didn't kind of work for me uh I would much sooner just focus on getting the best guests I can and having great conversations um so if you want to support the show just share episodes with friends I think more than 50% of podcast listeners find shows through personal recommendation so if you ever think ah I I really like and appreciate what Chris is doing just share it with a friend that's the best thing you can do and make sure that you're subscribed that's all that I'm going to ask of you the Dolan one how much of your podcast is edited do you cut out long pauses coughs Miss slips never pretty much everything that you see is almost exactly the way that it was recorded we very rarely cut anything uh I always wanted to kind of learn to be accurate with my speech without having to use the ejector seat button of uh an editor coming in and fixing whatever errors I made also I think it sterilizes the conversation a little bit too much and on top of that you and the guest are creating this Vibe and sometimes it's really slow or sometimes it's really awkward or sometimes it's really protracted or sometimes it's super fast or aggressive or whatever and I think I don't know it's kind of respectful of the audience to show you what it was like and not show you this sort of I don't know face tuned version of that I know there's lots and lots of podcasts that cut out everything from pauses to coughs to ums and S AI can do it for a long time people had editors going through and chopping all of that stuff out that's not my style i' I'd much sooner I think just show you it warts and all so uh yeah you can have faith that what you see is what was recorded tati t444 how can you wear shorts and a t-shirt shirt to interview a former United States Representative um I'm guessing you're talking about Tulsi gabard here uh I have tried to construct my life in such a way so that I never need to wear anything I don't want to wear don't need to wear a suit or a tie or pants if I want if I don't want to and uh I don't think it's disrespectful to do that I I I are we not Beyond somebody's dress being indicative of how much they care about something and I live in Austin and it's 105 degrees all the time and I want to be comfortable and [ __ ] you I was wearing Crocs as well so there we go David Atkinson 5149 hey Chris love the podcast just wondering what it's like living with a giraffe I know he holds a special place in your heart keep up the great work thank you uh I'm no longer living with Zach he's moved with his girlfriend this as you may notice is a new house uh this is new studio we're halfway through the build again I know that we only just changed it for the people that care and pay attention to the way that we're lighting this thing uh this is very much a halfway house there's lots and lots of work to be done uh but I'm in a new place uh the last one was killing me so and I'm going to I guess talk a good bit about that over the next few months Health took quite a big hit um but Z's with his chick now uh they're super happy uh he doesn't have to deal with me me uh harassing him to wake up earlier or whatever it was I was doing um but I got to see him the other day he came around to the new house so yeah we'll uh you'll still be seeing more of him over the next year Matthew Bernett 9850 podcasts have provided a necessary alternative to the mainstream but do you think the pendulum can swing too far in the opposite direction podcast fans may be forgiven for thinking that all vaccines are evil and climate change isn't real would you have on more mainstream voices such as Dan Wilson vaccines and Simon Clark climate so your audience exposed to all points of view I don't disagree this was the entire conversation that Malcolm Gladwell and Douglas Murray had that debate a couple of months ago uh I think that there is definitely still a place for the more mainstream uh positions it wouldn't do for everyone to just be a degenerate heterodox like independent Creator um and I know what you mean that when the institutions haven't really showered themselves in glory over the last four years it's very easy and cool to just assume that everything that comes out of Independent Media is true and it's not it's that's not the case we're not subject to the same kind of factchecking and and uh restraint that mainstream are and that exact restraint and perverse incentives is why mainstream media is struggling too so I think a right balance between the two to me seems to be the right way to go about it when it comes to climate change and vaccines uh you know the director the lead researcher Richard Betts on the intergovernmental panel on climate change has been on the showah Richie that is the lead data scientist our world in data's been on the show vaccines I never talked about that at all um that was something that I stayed clear of so I'm definitely thinking about trying to balance uh perspectives and viewpoints you know having the uh founder of green pece on who's very climate skeptical and him going super viral with that episode made me think okay well let's get some other points of view on I'm I'm consciously trying to do that as much as possible and hopefully that comes across n flan do you charge your guests slay guests for podcasts no and I never have and I have never been paid we've been offered like obscene amounts of money like really really high amounts of money to bring uh guests on the show uh that's by sponsors and just people that wanted to pay outright and I've never taken money um if I want to bring someone on the show it's only because I'm interested in speaking to them I will never ever charge guests uh and I will never ever pay or take money from guests uh for coming on like this is something that I guess is maybe a an Insight that not that no one really gets to see which is a lot of the time podcasters will get or in any independent content creator will get accused of being a grifter or a shill for the things that they do but nobody sees the things that you don't do nobody sees the tons and tons of money that you turn down from sponsors that you don't believe in or from guests that want to come on the show that you're not interested in but just have a ton of money behind them or maybe some weird nefarious organization that wants to push their point of view like no one sees or gives you credit for the things that you don't do for the guests you don't bring on that you don't agree with for the Partnerships that you turn down because you don't think that they're legitimate and that's kind of sad uh that I've sacrificed growth tons of growth so much so much and and money and all the rest of the things to then hear someone say I don't like ag1 and you shouldn't be and I'm like bro I [ __ ] used it every day for three years I used element every day for three years like it's I work with partners that I like oh you shouldn't I don't like this Tulsi gabbard is she's not a respectable she's got zero credibility I'm like I thought she was interesting sue me I don't care so yeah like trying to uh portray or trying to show that you're doing things in the right way is super L difficult because people will find a problem with all of the things that you do do and never give you credit for the things that you didn't and uh I don't know there's no way to change that it's kind of like um giving a homeless person money but filming it at the same time it's like I'm not doing this thing I'm not omitting to work with this company or bring this person on or accept this money or whatever uh because I want to get the good boy credits but I'm doing it because that's sort of The Virtuous thing to do and that's where my values lie but then to also have to be like it would be like giving a ton of money to homeless people not videoing it and then loads of people saying you don't give any money to the homeless how could you and you're like I just with so but no don't charge guests or receive money for it never will elen gelfand how can I get better at asking questions I made a podcast thanks to you well good luck uh I honestly think that following your curiosity it's such a obvious uh suggestion but following your curiosity what is it that you want to know and it kind of feels to me it's like touching the top of a like a membrane or something some kind of surface like at the top of a balloon and every so often there's a little divot and that is kind of it's an unqualified statement from the guest or it's something that you don't quite understand and just listening to the little voice in the back of your head to me seems to be um the best way that's when I'm at my absolute best when I'm just sort of sat sinking into what the guest saying and then they there's something happens like on wait before you move on and I ask a question couple of other things asking for clarification what do you mean by that can you elaborate say more you know encouraging the guest to keep going if you don't think that they're there um why is a fantastic question that very few like not enough people use keeping questions very short as well uh and something else that I did a lot of when I first started which everyone does because they're nervous is that they ask a question and then they offer up options um so they'd say uh so tsy it's interesting sort of what we've got coming up for the next couple of months what do you think the uh rest of 2024 has in store for the US cultural climate do you think that it's going to get and as soon as you do that do you think that or that you have now created this weird binary choice where the guest needs to either you've already kind of perverted the direction that they're going to go in and they have to either select one of the two or do this really awkward thing of saying no it's neither of the things you suggested it's a third thing so just asking the question and then allowing the discomfort there is a little bit of discomfort or at least I find found there was because everything's [ __ ] uncomfortable to me allowing that discomfort to sit and just letting it hang there what do you think the rest of the year is going to be like and just you don't need to offer up suggestions that's one of the things that new podcasters do a lot eeru have you ever shaved your head completely I mean this is pretty short this is a one and a half and a two uh even shorter than this no never I don't think the world doesn't need to see skin head Chris I'm not convinced that that's a a gift to the world or myself at all s Mario 2820 gosh you utterly beautiful human thank you thank you for being such a brilliant role model to so many young men the truth will prevail and O only if men and women like us will stand up for it may you continue to be healthy and Thrive for the good of us all question when are you having children and when you do so can you please have at least three SL Beyond replacement rate and can you please do more to actively encourage young couples to start having children earlier uh need to find the woman first I I feel like that's one of the important elements of having kids uh so once I've got her then start on the second part uh three God two is really the number that I like the sound of um I really like the idea of two just because all of my friends that have got more than two talk about the challenges of going to a restaurant or going to a theme park or getting in a car or getting a hotel or flying on a plane like the world is built for families of four and that would be great if the world could be built for families of five maybe that would actually encourage people to have more kids I don't know but um I don't know I it'll be it'll be at least two okay just give me give me time multi first how big would you dream if you knew you couldn't fail that's a cool question um I don't know I guess I think a lot of my life is driven by fear uh a lot of it is uncertainty and um vigilance and uh fear it's a it's it's a fear that things are not going to go well or that they're going to fall apart or that I'm going to mess up or that somebody's mad at me and that definitely does curtail my like ability to be ambitious so I guess I'm kind of a role model for people who don't actually have particularly Big Dreams or Ambitions I'm not like honestly I don't have a Five-Year Plan every time that someone asks me at whether it's a business Guru Mentor person on the show or somebody in my private life or a therapist or whatever I don't know where I want to be in five years I just it's like the ultimate proof that you don't rise to the level of your goals you fall to the level of your habits and my habits are that I work pretty hard and I pay attention to stuff so if you are someone who doesn't have particularly Big Dreams or a massive amount of self-esteem or or uh confidence uh it kind of doesn't matter you can feel like you don't deserve it and not believe that it's going to happen and it still go well so I know hopefully that's uh reassuring an American Jedi why were you sitting next to Craig Jones at cji are you the super secret donor no I'm certainly not I do not have $2 million to give to Craig Jones's degenerate Brazilian jiu-jitsu tournament that being said it was very fun and to all the people that came out and saw us there that was awesome uh but I don't know who that super secret donor was um I was trying to probe him even privately I was trying to find out who the [ __ ] it is that's got a couple of Mill to just toss to the Cub I don't know maybe one day he'll tell us the same day that he tells us why uh whatever it was the Dana death squads broke up there's so much law around Craig and that lot it's great what they've done it's kind of like a the the best seasons of Game of Thrones where everyone didn't have any idea what was going to happen next Tom the taxi driver fantastic achievement Chris you're a true Bastian of the movement against mental masturbation and I guess the physical kind too hooray for no fap thank you I'm really eager for you to dive deeper into your thoughts on no alcohol as you are someone who's gone a long time without and have reintroduced it at various points presumably successfully I'm over two years sober and for all the life-changing benefits that it has yielded I wonder if it's probably sitting in the same realm as other self-improvement practices like monk mode is useful for a period of your life before reintegrating into society sometimes wonder if drinking alcohol is a similar thing I know you've brought this up at odd times on your pod but would love to get you in full depth view on it thanks man I know you're crushing the American dream but we really could use a figure like you back in the UK can we draft you back in the taxi ride is on me Tom what a beautiful message thank you um okay so first thing uh I certainly do believe that there is a place for alcohol in your life I'm actually so horses shoy that I'm I'm on like the third Loop Round of this I'm now very like non fussed with alcohol even though I did the sobriety and then reintroduced and was like it's not just about going sober it's also about reintroducing it because anyone that says that a night out can't be made better by being a little bit tipsy hasn't had a sufficiently good night out and I do stand by that but the last couple of years each time I drink it's been less and less fun there just such better drugs out there if you actually want to enjoy yourself and not feel so bad the next day and I don't know just the effect of alcohol as a drug isn't that fun that being said the effects of sobriety are especially elective sobriety which was kind of the super lame term that I came up with for people who don't need to go sober but choose to go sober um the benefits of elective sobriety are so strong it's really really easy for you to just never want to reintroduce it uh I do have a sense that if you've got a problem with a particular substance even if it's a very mild one like uh it reduces the amount of personal growth that I'm able to do I do kind of believe that until you can reintroduce it on your own terms you haven't fully sort of transcended and included that uh so if nothing else it's a really interesting test to see one rule that you can use which I used quite successfully was uh sobriety was domestic and then if I ever did go away on holiday I would try out drinking and that usually meant that you know once every few months or whatever when I was taking a break from running clubs uh that I'd maybe get to have a few beers and see how I felt and usually I'd feel exactly the same that I'm not too fussed about that um reintroducing it is important that's why I've always said that people that are doing uh Focus period of elective sobriety should do it until a deadline and then reintroduce and then go again you're not doing this to be able to say I went sober for a th000 days I went sober for 500 days I went sober for 2 months or whatever you're doing it literally just for yourself no one else is counting the numbers you're not going to if you've done two years there's no chance you're going to slip back into being a party boy on a weekend you're already evidently in love with the idea of of being sober so just test it have a couple of be it'll take you one and a half beers to remind yourself about what the sensation of being drunk is like uh and when it comes to the drafting me back into the UK I will be in the UK on the 28th of November at the event in Apollo in London tickets are available at Chris williams. live London and apart from that uh it's going to be a rarity I'm afraid but you can see me on stage Nick twin1 14 have you read all of the Red Rising series onto book two now great read dude I [ __ ] love that Series so much I went back and started a again from the first one even though I haven't finished the seventh one or the sixth one whichever one it is now uh I went back and read the first one again and started it's so fantastic for the people that don't know what we're talking about Red Rising awesome sci-fi fantasy future novel series by PS Brown it's my favorite fiction series of all time it's available at the Modern wisdom reading list which you can get at Chris Williamson Chris willll x.com books 100 bucks that you should read before you die all of my favorites and there's a link to this one in there and a justification for why I like it uh but I'm just about to finish the final book in the series and I can't wait to see what he does next he's he's great that that series should come with a addiction warning label it's so fantastic Mark Crouch 25 congrats well earned thank you when will you become an adopted son of Dr Mike isrel when there will there be any animosity between Jared feather and yourself best of luck and keep up the great work uh I mean last time someone said that me and Mike isrel look alike and I accused them of having some kind of mental defect uh Jared feather and me probably look a little bit more similar but it's still not that much he's trailer trash from [ __ ] nowi in America and I'm trailer trash from the northeast of the UK so we have a little bit in common maybe all three of us have got four skins at least two of us do so who knows user 19 38 38 29 29 299 do you feel anxious about being 36 this year and not subtle down uh huh not anxious uh but it's certainly I'd be lying if I said it didn't play in the back of my mind that there was this sense should you not have got it more sorted by now uh I also understand that you make sacrifices in certain areas for progress in others and if I was going to do the move to America at 33 thing and try and you know restart a life or build a business on my own like completely on my own in this brand new country probably would have been quite tough to have held a relationship together or a marriage or something uh but I'm looking for I'm working hard okay I'm trying I'm I'm settling down I'm settled settling on in the process of settling and trying my best as quickly as I can after sun any plans to have progressives like Kyle kolinsky Krystal Ball Hassan Ali or politicians so Rory Stewart uh was on uh found him very good uh Brian class quite Progressive uh Ryan Holliday actually super Lefty although people don't give him credit for it obviously Destiny's been on uh Dean Phillips the Democratic n presidential candidate was on but I would love to get kylon and Crystal massive fan of both of them are impossible to get a hold of if anyone knows Kyle kinsky or crystal ball or can do the intro please feel free to Loop Us in uh because they don't seem to have email addresses at all and we been looking for it so yeah I'd love to have a chat with them I think both of them are very interesting uh Hassan ABI I've been in touch with a little bit um busy guy streams like 25 hours a day so we'll see if we can make that work shat Devo works out have you filled the positions you hiring for uh still ongoing we got 6,000 applicants like 6 and a half thousand applicants for two roles which sounds great but actually kind of made everything a little bit harder so that was a general manager and a guest Booker and uh we got just really phenomenal talent for both but it's taken time to go through it and my standards for uh the people that I want to bring on are obviously uh quite High maybe unrealistic so I'm we're doing the assessment period we're taking our time with that but we are getting there and hopefully there will be assistance to give me a little bit more time to actually read and have a life soon because I haven't necessarily had that recently Stuart danger Stuart Lee is the comedians median what are the podcasters podcasts that's a good question so Founders is definitely one that's the first one that comes to mind with David SRA being on the show before phenomenal Insight he takes one book or one person from history uh and just breaks him down uh that's great what else do I think I think Lex has uh a lot of podcasters listen to Lex's show uh oddly enough decoding the gurus uh is kind of like um the a little bit like the gossip it's like a left leaning more left leaning gossip thread for I know a lot of people in the industry listen to that or something similar to that q and on Anonymous uh blocked and reported very bad Wizards like there's something from that area which is the sort of critique sphere thing like a lot of people take um a lot of guys in the industry listen to something from that and then there was this whole I don't know whether they're still going because I I I stopped seeing them on my YouTube but this whole sort of critique sphere that was on YouTube A lot of it was focused towards uh comedy and stuff like that so to be honest much of it there's not many that are kind of underground Heroes uh much more of it is like weather reports and uh Gossip Girl but for podcasting uh I would say actually I would I would say um Tim Dylan is probably uh one of those because the solo style shows lend themselves to easy listening and it's good to kind of get a oh actually two more uh pirate wires by Mike salana um not necessarily A podcasters podcast but certainly from a news perspective I know a lot of people listen to that for their news that's in the industry uh and Allin all-in podcast crushing at the moment it's one of my favorites comes out every Friday uh the boys are great I I really really love what they're doing so that's some a combination of uh history uh news news and Tech SL gossip and then just exclusively gossip is kind of a a little blend there Thomas H 1944 didn't want to mention anything during the duo tour in Florence Chris big fan and all the best thanks Thomas yeah I went to Florence I went up the DMO uh and I very much appreciate seeing you there even if uh you kept quiet ASAC do you think being articulate is a talent to be born with um I can only speak for myself and I got teased a lot in school for using different words so one of the most common like one of the earliest insults I can remember is that I should [ __ ] off and read the dictionary again uh so it's some of it's innate uh it seems or at least was like very uh precociously uh started for me begun um but it's certainly something that you can develop and the the the goal is not to be articulate it's just to be precise right you're looking to just say the thing that you mean I'm actually actively trying to sort of dial back the complexity of of the language that I use especially when I'm writing you know some of the best writers George Mack Rob Henderson Ginder Bogle that did kind of in this online article sphere stuff that I love they don't use fancy words they're very very simplistic with their language they're just precise and I think that that's the goal Precision uh so uh you can develop it um if you spend time listening to people who have great vocabularies and then if you get a word for instance I read meretricious uh and really loved it as a word and thought that's cool like I really I really could do with that it fills a hole that I don't need and then I try to force feed it into a a bunch of of uh sentences and bits of uh writing over the next couple of weeks and now it's locked in I've got meretricious in in the old Arsenal um but yeah it's certainly something that you can develop mg. Squad Crocs in sport mode or regular it's regular all day I hate the way the Crocs look in sports mode if you see me in Crocs in sports mode some [ __ ] is going down like it is really it's [ __ ] on I'm running for a plane or I'm playing pickle ball and I've got no other pair of trainers nearby I've had to do it in Crocs which I have done before but yeah I just think they're so much cooler without that backstrap on and uh I'll fight anyone that disagrees Les Mills body coach what's your experience with lasic is it worth it yes 100% I had fantastic experience obviously if you read and I did uh if you read the nightmare stories on the internet you're going to get a lot of people whose vision went blurry and it never came back or who had some mishap in their surgery and all the rest of it so maybe the maybe the likelihood of that going wrong was 10% and I'm just in the 90% I don't know but my experience is great my vision is super sharp it works on a nighttime it was about a year that it tucked to settled I'm about I probably had it for about a year is now uh Vision on the nighttime took a little while to settle down uh there was this sort of flaring around lights which sounds cool and looks beautiful on a movie but it's really [ __ ] annoying if you're trying to drive so uh that was tough but now it's great I'm so so so glad that I got it done so for what it's worth I went to the uh OC in London I think it's like the optometrist College of London or something it's ocl London anyway you should be able to see it Wes Edgeworth unfortunate name do you work out at the same time every day or does it change to fit your schedule uh it's the same time pretty much every day 40 uh either doing class or with my trainer or sat on an assault bike doing Norwegian 4x4 and hating myself 7:40 in the morning which means I can get up at just before 700 roll myself around until I'm ready to move get in the car get to the gym and then be done and back at my desk by 9:00 a.m. that's the the plan finish by 9:00 a.m. and 7:40 does it rick folder do you fancy game of cricket when you're in Sydney yes yes I would love that apart from the fact that the last time I tried to play cricket I ruptured in Achilles so I'll watch and I'll I could field I could definitely field if I'm allowed to stand in slips I would 100% be down the field bat me down the order put a runner in for me so I don't need to actually do anything I would be down to do that uh by the way coming to Australia for the first time ever tickets are available at Chris williams. live Australia uh Wednesday the 6th in Melbourne Friday the 8th in Brisbane and Saturday the 9th of November in Sydney I'll be there on stage James Smith's going to be there as well sorry about that Q&A live talk from me intro from him it'll be great so if you want to come and see me in Australia Chris williams. live Australia Danielle Sinclair 28 have you signed the change.org petition for Alex oconor to shave his mustache or are you in favor I have seen this um I'm very Pro Alex becoming as visually spicy as possible I would love for him to start wearing skinny jeans like cropped skinny jeans get a high fade uh I I think that turning Alex into a [ __ ] boy would be one of the great gifts that I could give the world especially you know given my background in NTI I I do truly believe that I'm the man to be able to make this happen uh but I'm I'm completely in favor that guy's gone through multiple mustache eras uh a full-on beard era recently as well only as recently as as last year uh sh he went for a sort of a stubble approach as well I'm I'm on board I'm on board let let the guy cook right let his face cook M MIT m m mtis 88 when will you have benir on your podcast soon that will happen soon I promise nickovic if you hypothetically weren't seeing results from the Pod would still be doing it dude I did this thing when nobody listened literally no one when no one listened at all there's days in 2018 where we did zero plays we launched the Pod I was doing an episode a week we had all of the plays all of the backlog catalog history of old episodes were like 10 15 episodes in there was days where we did zero plays I did this long before anybody listened and I will do it long after I'm canceled I enjoy doing the show because I enjoy the people I'm speaking to if I ever stopped enjoying the people that I was speaking to then I would stop doing the show but it's not about the numbers it's never been about the numbers and that is you know the uh Bros fallen off meme uh it means that you're kind of immune to that because you were never doing it for that in the first place and it's the one thing that I found in life that I did like not as a commercial Pursuit it was done everything in my life in my 20s was always about some form of money or some form of sort of positioning or or whatever whatever and I did the show because I wanted to learn about the world and myself I wanted to better understand myself and the world around me and it allowed me to do it and that meant that anything else that came along you know that scene in peaky blinders where uh Arthur Shelby and Tommy Shelby are talking and they say that they came so close to death during the first world war at the Battle of the Som that everything after that was extra that's kind of what it feels all the things all the good things that have happened to everything after just getting to speak to people I'm interested in was extra so yeah I'd still be doing it beast when do you bring on nval do the thing uh I would kind of need to make the call about when I would like to ask in that favor uh I've got his WhatsApp we've spoken we spent a week together in Rowan at the start of the year uh I he very well may even say yes if and when I do it but I need to pluck first off pluck up the courage and secondly it's only going to happen once I think so when do I want to do it uh and pick the time appropriately and pick the the the shoot and make it sort of really beautiful this would that would be like the crowning episode for me I think like the full full circle so I need to work out how I'm going to do it but it'll happen stay patient Isaac mango when are you going to get the number one podcasters the number one podcasters the world Tim Dylan on the podcast the number one podcaster in the world Tim Dylan on the podcast uh we were so close I kind of teased that it was going to happen and it was uh and then his schedule and mine both changed uh but we are back speaking to his team so again give me time I'm slowly inching my way toward all of the people that we all want to speak to it's just [ __ ] busy man like they're busy and sometimes so am I MA Stevens like you I've drastically decreased my alcohol consumption how do you differentiate between times to let loose and have a drink and times when you should say no easiest way that I found this has been to set uh either uh Geographic or duration based limits and then it means that you don't need to actually make this call because how do you differentiate between when you should let loose and have a drink and when you should say no there's a lot of cognitive effort that goes along with that uh and it's kind of exhausting to am I going to do it tonight or am I not going to do it tonight and it just takes away from the enjoyment of the event should I have said yes I'm drinking or no I'm not drinking when you start to do it or you don't like you just don't need that so for me set a block of time and within that block of time a month or 3 months or six months or a year or whatever you don't drink doesn't matter you don't need to make the call right you've already made that commitment and or on top of that if you are uh away if you're abroad somewhere for me 2019 uh 4th of July in Nashville on Broadway with a quarter of a million people watching Chris Stapleton or someone play I'm having a beer I'm not not having a beer at that even if it's simply for the sort of tribute to be able to raise it in the air I'm going to have a beer so beer I did uh so I think that's the best way to do it don't differentiate between times to let loose and times to have a drink uh times to say no just stick to is it within the period I said I wasn't going to and am I in a location that I said I wasn't going to as well that's it Rock Health 22 how are you like really all of this instant Fame must be taking a toll on you yeah I mean again it's kind of hard to talk about the uh negative side effect of a ton of attention because it's like a millionaire talking about how difficult it is to file their taxes for all of the money that they've made or something you know it's a thing that lots of people aspire to have and that you created yourself and then you're whining about weird externalities that come along with it uh it's odd um and again this whatever version of Fame that I have is like degenerate Niche micro influencer Fame it's not real proper Fame at all um what's interesting that's happened recently I had the first time where the the attention was I I saw the glimmer of it being too much um which was just like the frequency of people coming up was too much uh that was new and kind of weird because up until now it's been whatever every hour then it was every 30 minutes and it was every 15 minutes when you're out in about and that's lovely like perfect Cadence couple of times an hour brilliant hi mate love the POG thank you um other than that like the other thing is I'm not built for the level of scrutiny that happens I don't think uh you know I am very much at the mercy of other people's opinions quite sort of chronically uncertain about things that I'm doing and this has gotten worse over the last year as I've started to do more therapy and do more emotional work because you don't hide away all of the things that you're feeling through bravado or distraction or uh you know comforting fibs that you tell yourself or whatever um it's all there just staring you in the face and um yeah that's been this year's been like a really difficult want to navigate I think as all of this stuff's happening with the show which is really great and flattering but then also kind of difficult too and who am I and why does the world see me differently and blah blah blah and then also who the [ __ ] do you think you are think the world sees you differently you just do a podcast like what the [ __ ] is this but then you can't help but feel the thing it's very complex and like unpacking it is real interesting so I don't know this is why I got a good bit of stick for uh talking to people like a billionaire Andrew Wilkinson or whatever uh about the fact that money might not make you happy and people just either discredit him or say that it's an obvious insight and I'm like well if it's so [ __ ] obvious why does everyone keep on trying to be richer hoping that it's going to make them happy and you know I'm really really trying hard to lay the breadcrumbs behind me as each of these different stages occur in becoming better known or whatever of like this was the first time that I ever felt that the attention was too much in person and having lots of people following and scrutinizing the stuff that you do on the internet might sound like it's great and just ego inflating but what it actually feels like is just increas in hate because you don't remember the compliments you only remember the insults so larger platforms are largely just more negativity because you don't remember all it's your your [ __ ] Teflon for the nice stuff and your velcro for the bad stuff like trying to leave it behind me as I go uh and that's my sedimentary layered Rock archaeology thing of that's that's what it was like and that's what it is like Whitley dark matter what life decision alternative Chris would you want to see play out I can't answer this question without spoiling dark matter and everybody should go and read Dark Matter uh because the book is fantastic I know that this a series on Apple TV uh that I haven't watched yet but a good friend told me that I should read dark matter and she was right it was awesome uh highly highly recommended I'm not going to I I can't answer that question without spoiling it and I want people to go and read it so I might answer it in future once more people have read it there we are uh do delus what is the hardest part about being you most people can't see or understand uh again it's like the millionaire whining about his this is the inner you know when we talk about that sort of British uh need to minimize suffering or to not sort of be too bigheaded like that that it gives me this sort of response like that um look I spend a lot of time on my own and I spend an awful lot of time under pressure largely pressure that I put on myself but the last couple of years has resulted in me just working more than I ever have on the show not doing the things that I started the show to do dealing with scheduling with guests and how we're going to shoot and budgeting and contracts and negotiations with partners and because as the show grows we need to be able to fund all of these big shoots to get out to the guests if I want to go and see Jordan Peterson in Arizona shoot with him I need to get together all of the money to be able to make that happen and then we need to schedule it and then we need to organize it and then we need to get the guys in there and then I still need to do the research and the prep and I need to sit down and have a conversation with them and then I need to chill out afterwards but oh there's ad reads to do before you finish up so the toughest thing about the show is all of the things that aren't the show that I still need to do like I am CEO founder operator host guest Booker guest researcher uh like chief of operations chief of marketing the Instagram like everything everything everything and I'm really looking forward to relinquishing that I'm so ready to let go of that and I've hesitated I don't talk about how the sausage is made on the show that much because you guys aren't here to hear me whine about the very thing that you're here to watch like you're here to just sit down and enjoy the show and learn interesting insights from somebody who hopefully I love and you find engaging and me harping on about the minutia detail problems of the actual way that this thing you enjoy comes about to me just I've always steered clear from kind of showing you guys that and it does feel kind of like I've got this weird relationship with someone I don't know who it is there's like a someone that represents all two and a bit million of you and uh I try I try to sort of keep you know it's like you don't tell your mom things to not to not sort of worry her there's like certain things I just don't bother saying um but that's the big thing the show involves a lot of stuff that isn't just the show and I know that that also sounds like well you why why bother going through it's so complex why not just make it simpler it's like well look if I want to achieve the things that I want to with the show which is to push the limits in terms of the guests that I can get and in terms of doing things people haven't done before F world's first podcast on the video wall or 3D or on location or whatever the [ __ ] we're going to do if I'm going to do that I need to be able to scale things up I need to make it more sophisticated ated but that's still come to this one point this tip of the spear Apex which is just me spinning tons of plates and screaming Into The Ether trying to hold it all together and that takes up a lot of mental space like way more mental space than I would like to admit so that's the toughest thing I think at the moment uh but I'm looking forward to having someone hopefully that can just be you like a big I used to stand on the front door next to these huge Jordy bouncers right these these Doorman from Newcastle uh and I just want a big Dorman in front of me and hopefully that's going to be the general manager SL CEO person that'll come in and they can deal with all of that stuff and I just get to go back to doing what I love to do which is finding interesting people and coming up with cool ideas so hopefully that's what's ahead de molon de molon any plans to interview Mel Robbins and have you been to Japan or any plans to visit Mel Robbins has been on the list for ages she's got a new book coming out later this year speaking to the team would love to get her on hopefully it'll happen I think it's going to happen Japan also yes ton of friends out there guy that asked the first question actually Chris cabana's out there uh I'd love to go but I've traveled a lot this year so I'm kind of I'm happy just being here in my new house Jay Clark you mentioned you were newly single how has your approach to life changed since you mentioned you were newly single how has your approach to life changed since since I'm near the single uh not much has changed to be honest man uh you know my last relationship was uh long distance so very much I was focused on work with brief periods of doing the girlfriend thing uh and then now life's kind of just the same but with without brief periods of doing the girlfriend thing which is probably definitely for the worst because it's just allowing me to work more and more as opposed to giving me uh a justifiable reason to stop working more um not much has changed to be honest uh it's certain a very different world to the last time I was single which was four years ago you know more before Co basically um very very big difference I think um which given that I was someone that spent all of that time researching it you know looking at maen Crisis online dating The Prestige and Status that's associated with a platform and how that impacts make preferences and so on and so forth It's like wow um I don't know uh when you experience it firsthand all of that stuff all of the changes in the world and and perverse incentives and all the rest of it it's a it's a real change I can see why people are confused Becky Irish why do you respect Dan Bilzerian that's a good question I do respect Nan actually uh caveat evidently that doesn't mean that I agree with even everything even anything that he says one of the reasons the reason that I respect Dan is that he says what's on his mind Dan's super power he's not the smartest guy in the room he's not the best looking guy in the room uh he's not the most really anything guy in the room but he says what's on his mind his brain or his like heart to mouth filter is one of the lowest of anybody that I've ever met like the thing that he's saying is the thing that he believes even if what he believes is wrong totally open to the the Pro Prospect of that being the case it's just really [ __ ] impressive to be around somebody who just does that and that doesn't mean that you need to agree and that doesn't mean that I'm [ __ ] glazing him what it does mean is he's a very non-fungible human in that way that are not many people like him and there was a lot that I think that everybody should have taken away from the episode that I do to them real Chris sailor 95 congrats Chris on 2.5 million I've been listening to Modern wisdom since early 2020 and it's been fantastic to be alongside you on this journey thank you you got me hooked on sleep toen earlier this year and now it's a regular gym playlist what other music recommendations do you have or what's on your frequent rotation nowadays keep up the good work big love to you and the team thank you very much so wearing the T-shirt today bad Omens uh they are [ __ ] fire their most recent album actually everything they've put out is so good highly highly recommend bad Omens what else have I been listening to recently um Paris still getting into a bunch of that I know they kind of ended up on the bad end of a a [ __ ] T of me too stuff Architects again kind of an obvious answer I guess uh but they're fantastic uh who's the dude that is supporting um sleep token in the UK there's this guy that's supporting sleep token in the UK does uh uh uh cranking my [ __ ] hog let's see if this comes up of course it's not going to come up because it's all one word uh let's see if I can get this come on come on Bill Murray [ __ ] yes got there Bill Murray b i l m u r i it's kind of um throw back to Mid 2000s like emo style breakdowns um I started listening again to Day to Remember 4 your strong uh Silverstein Taking Back Sunday I'm really in my full-on retro teen Age Era right now so I'm going back to a bunch of that what else uh Palisades bring me the new album's Fantastic like obvious but Bring Me The Horizon great and then a lot of anjuna deep like that's the sort of two barbell ends of the spectrum is aggressive sad sometimes hopeful emocore post hardcore stuff and melodic fruity uh deep house on the other end like absolute dopamine Chris and serotonin Chris um those are the two the fectos hi Chris how can you trust your decision-making confidently when you become more and more insightful into the flawed space of your mind good question when you see through the transient biases and impulses that drive you towards certain things not knowing if those destinations are the ones you want how do you get over the indecisiveness that inherently comes from seeing through the charade for example when I'm trying to feel if I want to spend the rest of my life with a goal I am seeing I cannot separate the wanting of closeness and comfort from the of what really is good for me I find it challenging to separate the immediate desire for closeness from the rational assessment of what's good for me I just love your podcast man keep it up you're an inspiration and a role model bro well thank you very much and I know you know the basis of this question is how can you make decision- making confidently when you become more and more insightful into the flawed space of your mind dude it's all for me it's all explained by a quote shock horror to the guy that [ __ ] loves everything explains everything with a quote uh ultimately happiness in life comes down to the discomfort between choosing to become aware of your mental afflictions or the discomfort of becoming ruled by them you can choose to be aware of your mental afflictions or you can be ruled by them and I want to be aware of them yes that is going to bring with it a whole host of insight about the fact that well [ __ ] I was so confident previously that this was was the right thing to do but now I see how inherently broken and flawed and uncertain and and winging it everybody including myself is how can I have any how did I ever make any decision before how did I ever make any sort of big commitment I think one of the problems that you have is that you increase the grandiosity and the importance of the decisions that you're making further than they need to most decisions are reversible in one form or another if any decision is revers you can make it pretty much immediately because you can turn it like you leave a a job okay you go to do a thing but you can get a new job presumably unless it's a very rare job or something that you're not going to be able to replicate but if you're in a sales role like everybody needs a good salesperson so okay leave the job try the thing and then go back to it when it comes to your relation your idea of in spend the rest of my time my life with a girl I'm seeing can't separate the wanting of closeness and comfort from the rational assessment of what's good for me I don't know why the desire for closeness and the rational assessment of what's good for you wouldn't be the same thing like it seems quite rational to want closeness it seems like if you're enjoying something what's more rational than that uh also I would try and pull you out of your own head I'm aware that like I'm saying this Mr cerebral uh but the more that I've tried to sort of embody emotions in that way uh in fact there was a a really great study done there was a a guy who needed either he was in an accident or he needed an area of his brain removing and this area of his brain was associated with emotion and the problem was that they asked him I think what time tomorrow he wanted to have his next interview with the doctors that were conducting the study and it took 30 minutes for him to not choose until someone suggested a day and he just agreed because without any emotional veilance no decision your priority set is constructed through emotions like it's just Vibes bro is so true the I the more that I think about it the more that I learn about life the more I'm convinced that it's just Vibes so I actually think that relying Less on rationality and not praying at the feet of that like if you did a thing and it felt good and you didn't regret doing it tomorrow what else is there like it was right in the moment and it was right in the future I don't think that you need to try and be able to predict every individual permutation like in [ __ ] Dark Matter uh you don't need to be able to predict how everything's going to go you just find something that feels right go with it if it's a reversible decision you'll be fine if it's something that you can do step by step that's also fine you'll be all right you're you're paying way more attention to all of this stuff than anybody else is so if you can learn to just release a little bit more instead of tightening up I think everything will be good Bogan 0402 what are your current goals in the gym what are you focusing on right now need more Vlogs about your training and routine greetings from Ukraine [ __ ] Ukraine bro wow that is cool these by the way element have started doing a RTD salty sparkling drink and it's so good um goals in the gym just absolute bro physique push P legs and at with a couple of additional sessions one is the Norwegian 4x4 thing that I spoke about with Dr Ronda Patrick trying to get a healthy heart and shoulders buys and tries on a Saturday with one of my boys and that's it it's nothing fancy it's what 1 two 3 four five and a half five and a half hours of training a week maybe a little bit more uh it's great uh Vlogs about training Mike isrel one is coming up soon George Heaton one is coming up soon Chris Bumstead is coming up soon so there will be more training like the least legitimate person to be doing training Vlogs in the world a guy that trains five and a half hours a week but here we are we're doing it s psycho 666 hey Chris appreciate your content congrats on the 2.5 mil thank you I have a question how do you get out of a rut do you even have ones or just your podcast requires you to never get under a certain level this a really that's a really smart Insight um I am unbelievably familiar with getting into ruts and uh you know throughout my 20s I was pretty sure that I had some intermittent depression thing that would just come along and flatten me and I had no idea why it was happening and I would struggle to get out of bed for a couple of days at a time it wasn't it wasn't I wasn't self Haring I was I wasn't in the absolute depths of despair but it was this very normal very sort of mundane boring type of depression just this mala's [ __ ] thing that I was swimming in where everything felt heavy getting out of bed felt heavy going to work felt heavy speaking to somebody felt heavy so I just didn't do it and I was working for myself so nobody could tell me to do otherwise so I'm very very familiar with it um I actually do think that the Pod kind of drags me through uh I work very well with accountability and this may be a useful insight to other people too that um one of the reasons that I've being able to stay so consistent with the show is that there is no way I'm not going to show up when there is a guest waiting on the other side think about how many times when you were in school or University or with a project for work or something where there isn't strictly a deadline and there's no expectation that you're going to do it I'm just going to learn Spanish Spanish because I'm going to learn Spanish or I'm just going to complete this submission early or whatever you never do you never do because you just continue to expand and expand and you can justify to yourself you Manana Manana Manana but if you were doing it with somebody else if you were sitting down to work together you're not not going to do the work there's someone there looking at you you're the partner in this project or your your teacher at the piano or [ __ ] Spanish or whatever it is that you're doing and the show has permanently kept me in the presence of an external accountable person and that's meant that I've never missed I've never once ever missed an episode ever in nearly a thousand episodes I've never once not shown up and I've been in like really sad moods like really really down moods although they've gotten less recently but I do think maybe 50% of it is probably actually maybe a third of it is because I've habituated myself into not sort of Permitting that milu to take hold maybe another third is that I've improved my quality of life sleep pattern diet training Social Circle uh weather of where I live lifestyle stuff uh and then the final third is kind of what you said which is that the Pod just means I I I I can't get under a certain level or else I can't perform and I want to perform and I care more about being good on the show and about keeping this thing this thing that I care about going and and proving to myself that I can do it I care more about that than I am worried or prepared to indulge me feeling sad so yeah I think find a Pursuit which is stronger or bigger than your bad moods is maybe a lesson to take away from LJ theog 12 what advice would you give to Rising public figures about dealing with being recognized in public harassment stalking not knowing if someone knows who you are when trying to make new friends Etc uh I'm not sure I'm the person to to give this advice I would love to hear from the person who could give that advice I can only talk about my own experience uh for me being recognized in public is unanimously good nobody has ever said this isn't [ __ ] challenge okay uh but no one ever says nasty things to me in public no one ever sort of I mean what what are you going to say like I didn't like that quote from John Paul SRA that you said or you you you're actually not not a public intellectual and like bro the fact that you've considered me to potentially be a public intellectual is's a problem of you not me I never claimed to be one anyway all the stuff in Public's fine harassment stalking uh again I don't know whe I think I might be a bit boring at least like personally quite boring uh and also the right level of out there and not out there uh I just the harassment stalking thing doesn't doesn't happen no one no one seems to Care by look or by crook whatever that saying is uh I seem to be getting through it not knowing if someone knows who you are when trying to make new friends you seem to really be able to tell that pretty easily um and yeah Mark Manson has this insight about like friends and fans and the sort of Challenge and the tension between the two um but largely it's just been a a mostly enjoyable experience uh with some mostly self-imposed uh problems and externalities when it's about the story you tell yourself about who you are Tangy renod 1261 hi Chris you've become my favorite podcaster by large margin I barely look anywhere else anymore your insights examples aphorisms and quick laughs have opened my eyes to a new way of seeing the world thank you thank you very much here's my question one I've been wrestling with how do you raise the bar and the pressure on yourself to work harder and change when the cost of this hard work seems higher than the life you are already enjoying what levers can you pull in your environment in your daily routine to force yourself to change and push harder when life is already pretty fine but could be better this seems mostly applicable to employees like me who have a stable N9 to5 but dream of more great question and I think it's where a lot of people sit you know this is the Reg beta Paradox in many ways life is not that bad but not that good you kind of have this sense that you're maybe built for more but you're not too sure uh you would have to risk a lot uh but not an unsurmountable insurmountable amount have to risk a bit which even makes the fact that you're not making you're not taking the risk seem embarrassing because it's not everything but also how much better could life be it's largely giving up the good for the great and how do motivate yourself to do it so one of the things that I did uh Tony Robbins awaken the giant within has a really weird if you look on Audible there is a 90minut version which is just workbook exercises there's a bit of narrative in it too I have no idea what the [ __ ] he made this for but a friend sent it to me it's so odd like this thing it's 20 years old and it's not the book it's awaken the giant within something just do a search and have a look through a bunch of them and he has a a few different exercises one of which is think about a thing that you want to make a change with now and bring into the present moment all of the ways it's cost you in the past is costing you now and will cost you in the future all of the situations you've been through where you wish that you could have changed it what it's doing to your life in the moment and all of the ways that in the future this is going to continue to cail and limit your happiness and your fulfillment and then do the opposite think think about how much better life could be if you did do this thing whatever the thing is whatever the change is that you're looking to make and then he redefines change uh making the decision to change as taking a physical action that moves your world toward it so there's no such thing he says as making a decision there is only taking an action what does it mean to say I've decided to leave my job what's that mean like doesn't mean anything just I have sent an email to my boss asking him for a me on Monday that's taking a step toward leaving a job deciding deciding is [ __ ] and I I I think uh for the chronic overthinkers amongst us uh it's a very good solution so uh that was something that worked really hard really well for me uh on top of that what are you here to do are you here to kind of exist in this Comfortably Numb interquartile range middle period thing of life or do you want to make some [ __ ] waves I want make some waves I want to do something that I look back on and I go yeah I actually I made that happen out of nothing I had an impact I left dent and that's not going to happen if you're sitting in good but not great and that's fine for a lot of people but I kind of get the sense that if you're listening to the show and asking questions like that that that's probably not for you and unfortunately the discomfort which includes udes potentially letting go of a good life to risk getting a uncertain great life is one of those prices that you have to pay and that's why so few people do it but if you want to do it that's a step that you have to take Aaron Mt love your work mate what's your favorite cologne to wear so at the moment I'm wearing bakarat Rouge uh the Yellow Version not the red version and any of my friends know that like if I have a borrow a hoodie or whatever that hoodie will stink of it for the next couple of weeks uh one of my friends this ad bucket for the show Sky uh I put his hoodie on on a plane maybe like a year ago uh and his girlfriend or his wife fiance at the time started complimenting him on how nice he smelled and he felt like he was being uh how do you say like uh nasally cooked by me from wearing this thing but backarat Rouge is fantastic I've been through a few Cycles uh pent halan Hal Fetti is fire that's really really nice it's a little bit stronger bit darker um there was this world in which everybody wore Creed aventus in Newcastle and it became a meme smell so I had to stop wearing that but yeah backarat Rouge at the moment is is my favorite and those other ones are are belters as well D willly 8408 do you wake up do you feel well rested waking up every day and if so what do you attribute it to I struggle with feeling well rested at seemingly random times all right so yeah that's a good question this year I've had probably the lowest energy I ever have uh largely because of fighting with health [ __ ] from this previous house and uh no I haven't I I'd love to just you know be the [ __ ] picture of podcasting health and tell you yes I'm always great or whatever uh but I'm not I'm sleeping more than I ever have and feeling less rest did but that's part of the recovery process for this [ __ ] I'm going through um I would do a mold check a toxic mold check on your house and I would get some uh immune markers Bloods of immune markers done um [ __ ] what what what are they called there's a couple of labs that do really great break if you just search for immune marker uh blood test uh that would be one of the first places that I would go to um maybe it's something in the environment uh maybe it's something in testosterone levels obviously you could get your tea levels checked you could get just like a full blood panel done Marik health.com wisdom and then modern wisdom I think is 10% off if you want to get that done in America if you're outside of America go and speak to a doctor um but you if you're sleeping well you shouldn't be tired and it means there's something else going on so I hope that you find out what the solution is Rasmus callman congrats thank you question it seems as though I'm either really productive with work in periods but my health and joy take a hit or I'm in full Zen mode living life meeting more people in 100% serotonin Rasmus mode very cool uh but failed to get enough work done so then I feel the lack of purpose and an overwhelming pressure to work harder do you run into this problem and how do you deal with it is the answer as simple as balance finding that seems arduous after all this time [ __ ] awesome question dude so this is the issue that we have multiple sometimes conflicting goals in life and we want to try and do both serotonin chill meditation have fun with my friends thing and I also want to be in Grind Mode my solution for this and this is something that I talk about on the new hosi episode is to have Obsession in the micro and variation in the macro I think the best way to try and work this in is to do let's say weekdays you work hard in Grind Mode and then on a weekend allow yourself a little bit more time to chill out and do stuff or if you find that you need to be more committed for a longer period of time you do one month on and then you have a week where you take a little bit more time to have fun and if that's not enough you keep pushing it out until you find the right Cadence and the right balance between the two for me personally I'm very much a creature of obsession and habit so I need to be in kind of one mode I'm either in Holiday mode I mean Venice on a gondola taking photos of ancient [ __ ] buildings that none of them are straight or I'm binning myself doing long days and allowing myself to just go fully obsess I'm obsessive on both right so I'm using my I think using my obsession to my advantage completely dedicated to work and then completely dedicated to Holiday and that pivot seems to work well so it sounds like you're built at least slightly similarly to me allow Obsession in the micro and balance in the macro which is basically periodizing things right health and joy something that you need to focus on so how often do you need to have health and joy and how often do you need to have the work thing in order to satisfy both of them and then as opposed to trying to balance them across a day try and balance them across a week or across a month or across a year that's a much easier way to do it same as Mike isrel said about getting a step count in it's like look my goal is to hit I think he does 11,000 so his goal is to hit 77,000 steps a week and if he does 9,000 one day he can do 13,000 the next day the same thing goes for calories it's not about how many calories you eat every day it's about how many calories you eat per day multiplied across an entire year right so it doesn't really matter about how your balances have work within the the minute right you're not trying to have a little bit of Zen and a little bit of grind per minute so just scale that out why do it per day or per week or per month periodizing between the two at least for me is my current working hypothesis and I reserve the right to reneg on it and say that it was a [ __ ] terrible idea not long ago Dr Brian keting you said you never aired your interview with Andrew Tate why not do you not worry about similar damage to your brand that comes from hosting anti-semitic misogynists like Dan belerian what other interest is there other than he's supposedly Rich what's the upside there okay so I think you might be a little confused about why I didn't share the episode with Andrew uh I didn't say anything about it being damag to my brand uh I didn't post it because at the time YouTube was taking down any uh covid skeptical information and then the reason that I didn't air it after that was because I actually felt a little bit harsh on Andrew I don't have really any um degree of loyalty or I don't have any obligation to to not stitch him up with a big video but just seems like a shitty thing to do it's not something that you do to somebody else to post a video of a quite gregarious person talking about a highly uh chaotic rapidly moving news situation three years later when we can kind of stress test a lot of the speculation that he was doing and it would just result in him making a ton of claims that kind of maybe didn't come out to be true or whatever I'm like well I don't know I wouldn't like that if somebody did that about me uh and also it's a bit out of date and it's three years and it would have been plainly transparent that the only reason that I was doing that was because he was a massive name he was the most Googled person in the world so all of the incentives aligned for me to just not do it uh taking this second question just as its own do you worry that similar damage to your brand comes from hosting anti-semitic misogynists like Dan Bilzerian so Dan went straight from the episode he did with me to do an episode with Patrick B David and that episode went up before ours went out Patrick turned his around before mind did and then Dan started sharing some clips uh about Israel and his position on that I don't care about his position on Israel I didn't know about what his position was and I didn't have a conversation with him about it I think that what other interest is there other than he's supposedly Rich what Brian you run a sign mostly science podcast uh I think if you were to look at Dan as somebody who has reached the Pinnacle of the Hedonism mountain and not think that there is something for us to learn from him that seems quite surprising to me uh maybe it's because running a science podcast you can't see the angle of this from a personal development lens but I think that there's an awful lot to learn from somebody who has been to the absolute extreme of fulfilling all of their gratuitous desires it would be surprising to me that you could couldn't see that there would be something to learn uh when it comes to damage to my brand I don't make judgments based on damage to my brand I speak to people that I'm interested in about things I'm interested in that's it uh and I'm sure that you do the same on your show so it wasn't to do with damage brand damage about Andrew Tate and I will continue to bring on people that I'm interested in regardless of what everyone else thinks about them there's no username here I'm just going to continue as a mom of two boys thank you for discussing issues men face the dating crisis topics and evolutionary psychology podcasts are amazing and have helped me to build up a library to reference as my boys grow up in this crazy world in addition my husband and I have in-depth conversations about what how we want to raise our boys while keeping these issues in mind thank you I appreciate that I very much do I didn't think about um I don't know the second order trickle down effect of mom's listening to the advice for guys and then teaching it to their sons but uh that's pretty cool are there any other books or researchers that focus on male adolescent development that you would recommend not my area of expertise but I would just stick to the big ones when it comes to sex differences I think that you learn an awful lot from the world of evolutionary psychology about how men and women uh sort of are in a more natural sense in terms of their sort of uh typical biases uh and you can learn an awful lot the a of the universe by Steve Stewart Williams uh the moral Animal by Robert Wright the happiness hypothesis by Jonathan height um Richard Reeves of boys and men uh Billy no mates another good book who else would be in there that's a good starting point and then in terms of followers like George from the Tin Men is just the the absolute best at this sort of men's rights ascended third wave manosphere stuff at the moment I think uh so I will continue to find the people just listen to the show you don't need to don't worry about new books or researches just keep listening to the podcast and I will continue to tell you everything Michael Rooney 934 oh man congrats thank you now you've been doing the newsletter for a while and have so many people reading do you think of yourself as a writer as well as a podcaster I actually do uh which is kind of cool didn't ever consider I don't like writer just seems like such a a salubrious uh title it seems like something that you know the upper echelons uh should be able to say but I've written like over a quarter of a million words uh since I started that thing so uh I guess I I guess I am a writer uh and I I really like it actually I really think it clarifies my thought in a way that um just speaking doesn't just speaking gives me a lot but uh writing gives me something else too so yeah I very much uh I very much appreciate that all right all right I'm done that's it I appreciate you all two and a half million Subs which is [ __ ] wild uh what are you going to see over the next few weeks you're going to see Chris bumpstead you're going to see lyanna Dee you're going to see will Tennyson Jesse James West you're going to see Casey neistat look at all of this releasing all of this stuff at the very end an hour and a half into an episode and so few people are going to get to hear it that's the little Easter egg that you get for sticking about Ben Shapiro Ben Shapiro is booked he's coming on I'm going to Florida to record with him as well what else is coming up um that's kind of it that's kind of that's that's the next few weeks uh that'll be happening while this comes out I will be away I'll be in Florida I'll be recording but uh I appreciate you all thank you for the support and and the kind questions and the patience of putting up with me while I work out how to navigate all of this stuff uh it's very very meaningful I'll see you next time